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Park my car. Run home, open my desk and take out all the tools needed as fast as I can. Foil, my lighter, a straw, and.. fuck I left the dope in my car. Sprint to my car, frantically look for my dope. Fuck, where is it? Did I drop it somewhere? Fuck..FUCK..oh shit there it is. Grab it, and sprint back to my room. Rip off a little piece of the dope, put it on the foil, straw in my mouth and light underneath.
Hear the sizzle as the heroin starts to vaporize. Smells and tastes like vinegar. Inhale as much as I can and hold it in as long as I can....slightly relieved...exhale. Need another hit. Light it up, inhale...........exhale. Ahh...much better. Just one more for now...light it up...inhale...exhale...
Tingly sensations throughout my body. Feeling light as a feather, as if I'm floating on water. Fuzzy warmness...extreme contentment...put down the tools... close my eyes for a bit and let the music take over....
Why was a I worried before? Everything's okay. Why did I ever even consider quitting? Feel like getting some Starbucks. A Venti Java Chip with extra chocolate drizzle, there is no such thing as too sweet. Put on my sunglasses, got my ipod. why drive when I can walk? Such a beautiful day, others might find it cloudy, dark, gloomy and cold, but it feels just right. So warm and cozy.
Good afternoon~~  just greeting random people as they walk by. Not a single negative thought on my mind.
Life is perfect.
  
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I when i saw the title i was going to ask what it taste like but you had that covered. Vinegar huh =/
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A blog every eight year old should read :D
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Is this a piece of fiction or a rl blog? I hope its the former....
In more positive news, go team 8!
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10387 Posts
I can only think about the Krokodil thread whenever I hear anything about heroin .. D:
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On November 29 2011 18:42 ArvickHero wrote:
I can only think about the Krokodil thread whenever I hear anything about heroin .. D:
This. I think about that shit all the time now...
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On November 29 2011 18:42 ArvickHero wrote:
I can only think about the Krokodil thread whenever I hear anything about heroin .. D:
eww that stuff is crazy man..
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This feels so wrong :-/
I'm glad that I've never even tried a drug (Except for Alcohol and one obligatory cigarette when I was 14 years old or something like that).
Relying on something to make your life bearable feels so strange to me, but I guess everything has a story and nothing is as one-dimensional as mankind would like it to be.
But at least you are happy, embrace the feeling! (And because of my own view on the topic I hope that you will not have to rely on drugs forever <3)
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i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP?
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On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP?
Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck
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On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck
Noooo OP! Watch some brood war to overcome the withdrawals. Even nature has to rejoice when proleague's back on again.
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Life is perfect until you don't have any money for a hit that your body needs and steal from your family/friends/strangers.
0/5. Go and brag somewhere else.
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On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck
pawn some cd's and get a bottle of t1's over the counter. cold water extract the codiene out, drink the solution and you wont be THAT dopesick.
ive been clean from drugs/booze for about 3 weeks. try it out ._.
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On November 29 2011 18:59 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck pawn some cd's and get a bottle of t1's over the counter. cold water extract the codiene out, drink the solution and you wont be THAT dopesick. ive been clean from drugs/booze for about 3 weeks. try it out ._.
you Canadians are lucky codeine is OTC! it isn't in the US 
On November 29 2011 18:57 Gridlock wrote:
Life is perfect until you don't have any money for a hit that your body needs and steal from your family/friends/strangers.
0/5. Go and brag somewhere else.
lol yeah I'm bragging because being a junkie is such an accomplishment. faggot
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Come to the united states, drugs are a lot cheaper here considering mexico border security isn't very good drugs slip in quite easily, and there is a large market. You won't be broke for a fix as easily, and the jobs generally pay more as well... Also some states rehabilitate offenders instead of giving them prison sentences, so who knows, that next bust might get you on your way to being fixed.
Edit: wait y ARE in the us? Shit. O.k., i dunno how to help, i hope you cqn get through the next week, just don't do that krokodil shit and you should be fine.
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On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck
Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo
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Thanks dude but my cigarettes are more than enough for me. I smoke a pack 4 days btw. Good write-up about a bad thing.
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On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo
uhhh, thanks for the judgement. i think it really says something about someone when they come into a thread and call someone addicted to something "sad".
also, i call bullshit, nothing that isn't heroin feels as good as heroin, lmao.
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On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo
I envy you. wish I can say the same
On November 29 2011 18:57 casualman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Noooo OP! Watch some brood war to overcome the withdrawals. Even nature has to rejoice when proleague's back on again.
haven't watched bw for a while. maybe it'll keep my mind off things~
On November 29 2011 19:04 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo uhhh, thanks for the judgement. i think it really says something about someone when they come into a thread and call someone addicted to something "sad". also, i call bullshit, nothing that isn't heroin feels as good as heroin, lmao.
haha that's true and that's what I'm worried about.. I ask myself, will I ever find something as good?
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On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP?
I snorted it once too but it was the only opiate I used. I must say it had not a single negative effect the one time I used it but I have too much respect to use it again and enjoy hallucinogenic drugs more.
Why are you afraid to use it intravenous though? I thought if you educate yourself properly and are not a fucking junkie and use fresh syringes and needles from a pharmacy it is one of the safest since you can control dosages more then with other methods?
I could be talking bullshit but there must be a reason doctors use syringes to apply opiates.
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On November 29 2011 19:06 REDBLUEGREEN wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? I snorted it once too but it was the only opiate I used. I must say it had not a single negative effect the one time I used it but I have too much respect to use it again and enjoy hallucinogenic drugs more. Why are you afraid to use it intravenous though? I thought if you educate yourself properly and are not a fucking junkie and use fresh syringes and needles from a pharmacy it is one of the safest since you can control dosages more then with other methods? I could be talking bullshit but there must be a reason doctors use syringes to apply opiates.
i just have a needle phobia plus, as much as people love to brag about not becoming a full blown junkie after shooting junk, it's nearly impossible in the long run. my life already blows enough, not gonna ruin it further by becoming a full blown street junkie :3
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I wonder what it is that turns people to using drugs? I mean everyone knows it's bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. I'm hoping to get a different perspective here. Especially in 1st world countries, life can be rough but opportunity is always there, and the conditions aren't ever as terrible as you see in the slums in Russia and Eastern Europe.
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On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I wonder what it is that turns people to using drugs? I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. I'm hoping to get a different perspective here.
everyone has their own story
On November 29 2011 18:48 FinestHour wrote:
It tastes like vinegar?
black tar heroin does. never tried the powder form
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As someone that has met mad people addicted to Raw I hope you decide to back off OP. It just gets worse and worse, I understand the need to get high as I smoke pot regularly but raw is just a whole different ballgame .
Best of luck man, sounds like you need it.
<3
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All the junkies I knew ended up with the needle. Smoking is not an option kid, it just stops doing it's job after time...
The sooner you quit this shit - the better.
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On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. .
first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that)
the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose (you can, but non fatally, there are exceptions), you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different).
shut up, please.
User was banned for this post.
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On November 29 2011 19:10 Diamond wrote:As someone that has met mad people addicted to Raw I hope you decide to back off OP. It just gets worse and worse, I understand the need to get high as I smoke pot regularly but raw is just a whole different ballgame . Best of luck man, sounds like you need it. <3
Thanks man~
On November 29 2011 19:11 Corrupt wrote:
All the junkies I knew ended up with the needle. Smoking is not an option kid, it just stops doing it's job after time...
The sooner you quit this shit - the better.
yeah it's gotten to the point where i almost don't feel it anymore. that experience i typed up was how i felt the first few times i smoked heroin. the honeymoon phase as people say
User was temp banned for calling someone a faggot.
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On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please.
I'm sorry, I'm just repeating what has been pounded into me over and over again ever since youth. You know, D.A.R.E. and all that crap. Didn't mean to insult anyone...
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On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please.
No you please be quiet. Other drugs besides those thee DO kill people and ARE bad. T_T. It's you that sound uneducated. Also while some hallucgenics like LSD have no recorded deaths some people fuck themselves up bad on the drug, as I have seen it happen with my own eyes.
Some have less risks then others, however to call everything but meth, nicotine, alcohol, and heroin not dangerous is just plain wrong.
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On November 29 2011 19:15 casualman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. I'm sorry, I'm just repeating what has been pounded into me over and over again ever since youth. You know, D.A.R.E. and all that crap. Didn't mean to insult anyone...
facetiousness is not an argument.
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On November 29 2011 19:17 Diamond wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. however to call everything but meth, nicotine, alcohol, and heroin not dangerous is just plain wrong.
because thats exactly what i did. you should try out some reading comprehension. also, i was implying educated, recreational use of hallugenics/ethnogens/psychdelics is safe. of course you can ruin your life on lsd or any drug, but the important part is to do them in an educated manner, and safely (which many do, everyday, millions of people.)
so take your archaic view on drugs back to the bible belt.
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On November 29 2011 19:15 casualman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. I'm sorry, I'm just repeating what has been pounded into me over and over again ever since youth. You know, D.A.R.E. and all that crap. Didn't mean to insult anyone...
I actually understand where both of you guys are coming from, that's why i didn't take offense to your comment casualman.
but a lot of people have misconceptions and are quick to judge about drug use, which often pisses me off too. but i know that wasn't your intent.
apalemorning, perhaps a psychedelic trip can help me...haven't had one in a while haha. long over due
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Oh yeah, i remember you.. You wrote all those Opiate and Benzo blogs. I really don't know what else to say, drugs are interesting topics though.
Good luck to you, if you need it..
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On November 29 2011 19:20 danmooj1 wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:15 casualman wrote:On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. I'm sorry, I'm just repeating what has been pounded into me over and over again ever since youth. You know, D.A.R.E. and all that crap. Didn't mean to insult anyone... apalemorning, perhaps a psychedelic trip can help me...haven't had one in a while haha. long over due
haha, probably not. abstinence and detox is your best bet. it blows but being clean is much better than chasing highs all the time.
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this is kind of a sad blog, besides being poorly written with conflicting styles between sentence fragment panic and inner monologue interrogation.
I would strongly suggest an alternative OP. occasionally getting high from bud is fine, but if you get to the point where you question the sanity in quitting or can't enjoy simple things like coffee and good weather without heroin then you're approaching a slippery slope. the fact that you're only blogging about a drug experience is a window into how narrow your experiences are.
I hope I don't come off as precocious, I've just lost some friends to this drug, can be really fucking dangerous.
On November 29 2011 19:19 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:17 Diamond wrote:On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. however to call everything but meth, nicotine, alcohol, and heroin not dangerous is just plain wrong. because thats exactly what i did. you should try out some reading comprehension. also, i was implying educated, recreational use of hallugenics/ethnogens/psychdelics is safe. of course you can ruin your life on lsd or any drug, but the important part is to do them in an educated manner, and safely (which many do, everyday, millions of people.) so take your archaic view on drugs back to the bible belt.
hey I think you have a good point but you have insulted 1) americans and 2) christians within the span of a couple of posts. so if you would like people to not judge your recreational pastimes ignorantly then I suggest you stop generalizing other cultures as well.
kk?
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Well, different people have different things they do for enjoyment, just myself personally would avoid such a chemical form of recreation. It's interesting to see what the experience is like from that other side. I can't help but feel hope that you'll not let these chemicals control and degrade your life.
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Scientists need to find something heroin that won't fuck you up i've heard it's the best thing you will ever experience, too bad once you do it there's a chance you will never ever want to stop, and the vast majority of people who don't quit immediately end up really really bad :/
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On November 29 2011 19:19 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:17 Diamond wrote:On November 29 2011 19:12 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I mean everyone knows its bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. . first of all, i want to tell you that you probably lack life experience ( edit/ oh wait, you're american, this explains your attitude on drugs completely), drugs are not "bad" besides the big three, nicotine, alcohol, heroin. (and meth, but only full retards do that) the large majority of hallucgenics/ethnogens/psychedelics are safe. most of them cannot kill you, you cannot overdose, you cannot get physically addicted. (psychological addiction is something completely different). shut up, please. however to call everything but meth, nicotine, alcohol, and heroin not dangerous is just plain wrong. because thats exactly what i did. you should try out some reading comprehension. also, i was implying educated, recreational use of hallugenics/ethnogens/psychdelics is safe. of course you can ruin your life on lsd or any drug, but the important part is to do them in an educated manner, and safely (which many do, everyday, millions of people.) so take your archaic view on drugs back to the bible belt.
So rude. Casual said that it's bad. Generally heroin isn't a positive experience for most users. There was no need to jump down his throat. And all that "get life experience" "oh you're from america figures" stuff just makes you look like a jerk.
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On November 29 2011 19:08 casualman wrote:
I wonder what it is that turns people to using drugs? I mean everyone knows it's bad shit, but some people still end up doing it regardless. I'm hoping to get a different perspective here. Especially in 1st world countries, life can be rough but opportunity is always there, and the conditions aren't ever as terrible as you see in the slums in Russia and Eastern Europe.
I don't wanna judge you, as I don't know you. But most people turn to drugs (as in using them on a regularly basis) when their life sucks and they just don't know how to deal with it. Most people use first time because they are curious, most of these quit forever after they've tried that, at least that's the way with weed. Many continue to use once in a while. But some, and these are probably the people you are talking about I guess, stay with the drug(s). There is a lot to drug usage, much more than most people are able to understand, first of all since they've never used it. Smoking weed once in your life doesn't tell you shit about how it feels to just sit there with a big blunt, enjoying life for lifes sake and for no other reason.
To break it down in my own words, I think the most common reason for most people to use drugs, is to plainly feel alive or "feel themselves". If that doesn't make sense to you, you should just continue living your own life, as it seems you have everything you want. But some people don't, so they have to reassure themselves about being alive. Other people do extreme sports, fuck all day or get any other sort of adrenaline rush on a daily basis. Btw, I, as a once heavy potsmoker, now occasionally stoning my brains out, wonder myself what it is that turns people to do bungee jumping, cliff diving, etc., but I guess it's just the same reason I do 5g over a weekend if I have nothing else to do.
To the OP: I hope you'll find a reason to get better, I've never done anything harder than weed, despite having been tempted countless times. I've suffered from serious depression and I still do sometimes when things aren't going so well, so I'm afraid I'd get completely fucked over if I did something "harder". But in the end whatever you use, if you use it excessively you should try and talk to somebody, it doesn't matter who that is, just talk about what you really think, even if those thoughts are disturbing yourself. Don't be afraid.
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Heroin is bad because it produces extreme euphoric effects yet has no real positive impact on you. It feels so good and the withdrawal is so bad that addicts gear their lives toward obtaining it and eventually let nothing stand in the way of the next high.
Basically, heroin makes you think as short term as possible because the immediate reward for shooting heroin is so high that you don't care about long term rewards of pursuing other activities. Not to mention you are contributing nothing to society by doing so.
If you're smart, you'll think on a meta-level and realize that despite the extremely high positive short term effects of heroin, you are better off avoiding it and instead seek long-term positive effects in your life. They are out there, you just have to find them. They don't land on your doorstep or require 0 work like shooting heroin does.
A little on reinforcement theory in human psychology: http://wireheading.com/brainstim/
Best of luck.
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On November 29 2011 19:15 danmooj1 wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:11 Corrupt wrote:
All the junkies I knew ended up with the needle. Smoking is not an option kid, it just stops doing it's job after time...
The sooner you quit this shit - the better. yeah it's gotten to the point where i almost don't feel it anymore. that experience i typed up was how i felt the first few times i smoked heroin. the honeymoon phase as people say
I really, really wish to see your next blog saying how you got all clean and stuff..
Get some help man, please do. I know you want it.
(by the way, the op did fooled me.. how long you're doing this..?)
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Danmooj is banned, this is kind of sad. I hope everything goes well for him. Hopefully he took my advice about watching proleague, it's so beautiful that it has helped me through difficult times as well. My heart goes out to you danmooj <3.
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On November 29 2011 19:25 nttea wrote:i've heard it's the best thing you will ever experience, too bad once you do it there's a chance you will never ever want to stop,
Never tried it myself but I know of people who have and this is very inaccurate.
Good luck in life op. you know this shit is going to make you want more and more until it gets very bad, so I hope you make a conscious effort and manage to get out, the sooner the better. Hope all goes well
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I've tried it but how I threw up when I did it always put me off. That and the fact that most of the fucked up junkies who hang around the park were taking heroin steered me off it personally. I stick to weed/psychedelics/disassociates with the odd deliriant trip every now and then
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I'll try anything once. I just haven't had the opportunity yet.
Everyone I know who's done it has said it was pretty much the best thing ever. I haven't ever known anyone who had access to it though (that I know of).
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On November 29 2011 19:37 casualman wrote:
Danmooj is banned, this is kind of sad. I hope everything goes well for him. Hopefully he took my advice about watching proleague, it's so beautiful that it has helped me through difficult times as well. My heart goes out to you danmooj <3.
What would you recommend for proleague withdraw then? I know i went crazy during the off season.
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On November 29 2011 19:59 thopol wrote:
I'll try anything once.
This is just a clichéd, bad philosophy. I don't like to deprive myself of life experiences, and this is one of the reasons I'm quite progressive about drug use. I do, however, do my research before I ever do anything because the risks often outweigh the rewards. It isn't all DARE propaganda; some substances are severely addictive or physiologically harmful, even after only one use.
Good luck, op. You can still change your life for the better if you want to. In the long run, the highs are fleeting and the lows too much to bear.
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On November 29 2011 18:57 casualman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Noooo OP! Watch some brood war to overcome the withdrawals. Even nature has to rejoice when proleague's back on again.
But ..but ...then he will have to deal with the broodwar-withdrawal as well afterwards.... NOOOOO! First world problems
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On November 29 2011 19:43 SchOOl_VicTIm wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:25 nttea wrote:i've heard it's the best thing you will ever experience, too bad once you do it there's a chance you will never ever want to stop, Never tried it myself but I know of people who have and this is very inaccurate. Good luck in life op. you know this shit is going to make you want more and more until it gets very bad, so I hope you make a conscious effort and manage to get out, the sooner the better. Hope all goes well
what part?
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Everyday is a new day man, just try and stop everyday. Find something else to do when you get cravings. I hope you get better man.
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My father was on heroin for over 30 years.
It never directly killed him.
His fucked up liver killed him. Literally broke apart inside his body. It was an agonizing death that lasted longer than I ever thought one could survive the process of death (literally lived for like 4 days after you could smell the organ decay on his breath). During the last 36 hours of his life, pieces of organ tissue, god knows which organ they belonged to, passed through his catheter. Because of his drug history, he was not permitted to have any narcotic painkillers during this process.
Promise me, OP, that you'll put a bullet in your head before you allow your son to watch this happen to you.
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On November 29 2011 21:25 Chargelot wrote:
My father was on heroin for over 30 years.
It never directly killed him.
His fucked up liver killed him. Literally broke apart inside his body. It was an agonizing death that lasted longer than I ever thought one could survive the process of death (literally lived for like 4 days after you could smell the organ decay on his breath). During the last 36 hours of his life, pieces of organ tissue, god knows which organ they belonged to, passed through his catheter. Because of his drug history, he was not permitted to have any narcotic painkillers during this process.
Promise me, OP, that you'll put a bullet in your head before you allow your son to watch this happen to you.
My father was doing heroin for about 10 years too. Let the family down, got Hepatitis C. Went to brazil. Haven't seen him in years. Fuck that shit.
OP STOP THAT NOW or prepare to die miserably.
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Stop doing black tar. It's bad for you.
Don't do drugs kids.
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after trainspotting and requiem I will never touch heroin
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Cute read. Pretty neat. Cool to read about how it feels to be addicted n' stuff.
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one thing that people with little sense of empathy never realise is that the reason they moralize a drug addict is to make them feel better about themselves. it's never to prove a point, of course - it's like bullying someone at school, seldom with any sort of life experience or understanding of the offroads of this world. hardly do alcoholics get the same treatment.
at the base of it all, few recreational drugs known in modern medicine cannot be used safely and responsibly just for the sake of having fun. a person who wounds up abusing them (especially opiates due to their introverted nature) rarely gets there because of trying to have fun, much less in a safe and controlled manner. like, say, most people approach alcohol because it's common sense to us. good luck to the op, stay strong
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I get sad when reading this OP. Kinda reminds me of Perfect Day by Lou Reed, which is one of the saddest songs I've heard.
I think heroin is the best thing ever(from what I've read), but as I don't want to do it the rest of my life, I will never try it, as I'm afraid that the rest of my life will be bleak compared to it.
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On November 29 2011 19:32 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:Heroin is bad because it produces extreme euphoric effects yet has no real positive impact on you. It feels so good and the withdrawal is so bad that addicts gear their lives toward obtaining it and eventually let nothing stand in the way of the next high. Basically, heroin makes you think as short term as possible because the immediate reward for shooting heroin is so high that you don't care about long term rewards of pursuing other activities. Not to mention you are contributing nothing to society by doing so. If you're smart, you'll think on a meta-level and realize that despite the extremely high positive short term effects of heroin, you are better off avoiding it and instead seek long-term positive effects in your life. They are out there, you just have to find them. They don't land on your doorstep or require 0 work like shooting heroin does. A little on reinforcement theory in human psychology: http://wireheading.com/brainstim/Best of luck.
This is the perfect post of this thread
Heroin is bad because it's too good basically.
edit : and don't read that saying to yourself "Not me, I'm too strong for this, I'll just try and forget it" You won't. You'll try and you'll love it and you'll be a human waste 5 years later.
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The highs of heroine are great, sure, but the lows will ruin your life. After the first high it never feels that good again. You feel so bad that you need another fix to feel good again. Eventually you will have to use just to feel 'normal' again and after that you won't even feel as good as 'normal' and will be in a constant low. Addiction will consume your life. I used to work in a methadone/rehab clinic, I've seen what heroin addiction can do to people and I would not wish that upon anybody.
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hehe. sounds like me every day, but i shoot. been shooting since i was 16 (now almost 22  ).
i'm from oklahoma and all we get is KILLERRRRRR black tar here. shit is fucking sick, but its 40$// .2g, and $90// .5g
a good .1 will have me on my ass, and i've got a crazy tolerance though, if that tells you the quality . the dallas dope i've had takes me about a big to catch a buzz, but i can get a nod off half small here . ♥♥♥ me some dope. i wanna go get some at lunch. think i will
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Ill never be touching the stuff but hey, if it works for you, great.
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On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo
I'm glad you've found solutions to all your first world problems.
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About the first time thing - yeah, there are plenty of people who have tried heroin once, including some of my friends. They all say that they still feel the withdrawal from that one time months later, and that's the real scary part about that drug. Sure, you can do it just once but heroin is just insane in the way it makes you feel, so if you don't stay strong and go back after that first time it's hard to get out. ^_^
Not that I would know, as I never have and hopefully never will touch drugs~
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Calgary25980 Posts
You must be SoManyDeadLings and I forget your other aka.
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I feel somewhat sad after reading the blog and all the comments. I hope that you can find happiness without heroin. Good luck
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On November 29 2011 19:32 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
Basically, heroin makes you think as short term as possible because the immediate reward for shooting heroin is so high that you don't care about long term rewards of pursuing other activities. Not to mention you are contributing nothing to society by doing so.
So beeing a cocaine addict is fine because you contribute to society by beeing more productive because of it? You have a really fucked up way looking at live.
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I have mixed feelings after reading this.
On one hand, I just want to tell the OP that he's a retard (hear me out) - There is nothing to me that would justify doing heroin. I'm what I would consider a naturalist. I've fucked with chemicals here and there, but I will stick to my weed and my occasional low dose shroom trips because I don't want to wreck my body.
On the other hand, I commend the OP for posting it because it's real. Not sure if it's a subtle reach for help or advice or whatever, but I'm sure on some level you know you shouldn't be doing it.
TL is home to people from all walks of life. For all you know, Nyvone could be the biggest narcotic user on these boards (I mean, he does write up some pretty interesting ban poems!) and it sucks that people just came flying in here with their "Drugs are bad, mmkay?" attitudes.
But basically, I just hope you kick this thing dude. I understand about taking the edge off of a shitty day, but you couldn't have picked a worse way to do it (short of meth, but as stated, that's more of a full retard drug).
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On November 29 2011 21:54 Probe1 wrote:
Stop doing black tar. It's bad for you.
Don't do drugs kids.
Heroin isn't instantly (or just) black tar.. -_-
But yes, it's bad.
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This was a strange read. Must suck to rely on a drug to live a happy life.
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Hey there op, I wanted to share a little something with you. This is my first post on TL, but have been an avid follower of the site for quite some time. I am 26 years old and was a drug addict for 12 years. I was kicked out of my house, in and out of jail and rehabs, ended up in a half way house, and have finally got my life together the past 2 years. I'm not judging you, nor am I telling you what you should or shouldn't be doing, but I know the road you're going down. I just want to let you know that you are a person without the drugs. You're life is worth more than getting high. Jail, rehab and death is what heroin is. All the pleading and statistics won't help you. You are ready to change when you make the decision. If you ever want to talk or need information on support, let me know. I would also like to add if it wasn't for starcraft I would probably still be hustlin for my next fix. Gotta find something to replace it with when you're ready. I wish you the best of luck.
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On November 30 2011 02:12 Chill wrote:
You must be SoManyDeadLings and I forget your other aka.
I hated that guy. I didn't know he had an aka, if you remember, what was it?
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Cool imagery, almost makes addiction and drug use sound nice.
Almost
I'll stick to my healthier, safer, less expensive, and more legal hobbies. Good luck though.
On November 29 2011 19:04 apalemorning wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo uhhh, thanks for the judgement. i think it really says something about someone when they come into a thread and call someone addicted to something "sad". also, i call bullshit, nothing that isn't heroin feels as good as heroin, lmao.
Sex? Seriously?
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I always wanted to know what it was like on the receiving end of the syringe full of heroin. You can only guess so much on the observing end.
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On November 30 2011 04:04 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Cool imagery, almost makes addiction and drug use sound nice. Almost I'll stick to my healthier, safer, less expensive, and more legal hobbies. Good luck though. Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:04 apalemorning wrote:On November 29 2011 19:03 NrG.NeverExpo wrote:On November 29 2011 18:52 danmooj1 wrote:On November 29 2011 18:48 apalemorning wrote:
i've done plenty of opiates, including snorting heroin once. i don't think i have the balls to shoot it. are you fo reals OP? Yup. Never had the balls to shoot up either. Not that I'm scared of the needle, I'm scared I'm gonna be more addicted than I already am...it already feels good enough. I'm on my last dose of Oxycodone right now. I have no more money and no more dope, so tomorrow and for the rest of the week I'm gonna feel like complete utter shit. Withdrawals suck Sad you have to rely on something like that make you not "feel like complete utter shit". I have found many things in life that make me feel the way you expressed in your OP without harming my body or chancing an addiction Oo uhhh, thanks for the judgement. i think it really says something about someone when they come into a thread and call someone addicted to something "sad". also, i call bullshit, nothing that isn't heroin feels as good as heroin, lmao. Sex? Seriously?
Honestly i would not doubt the fact that heroin feels better than sex. Sex is just awesome because it gives your mind all those pleasure sensations that we all desire instinctively... but it would not surprise me if heroin did much more than that to your mind in the sense of feeling awesome, happy and perfect. Drugs are much crazier than any high you can get naturally, and that probably includes sex. I am sure the pleasure of heroin lasts much longer as well - but i dont even actually know how long a "standard" high on heroin actually lasts.
Tho i have never done heroin, but im just saying it wouldn't be a surprise to me.
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This makes me sad. My best friend from when i was 12 to about 17 recently died from what I assume was a heroin overdose, his parents never wanted to say, but he had addiction problems and just laid down on his couch and died so I assume. huge fucking waste of a life, hope you can kick it
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On November 30 2011 02:49 WhuazGoodJaggah wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2011 19:32 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
Basically, heroin makes you think as short term as possible because the immediate reward for shooting heroin is so high that you don't care about long term rewards of pursuing other activities. Not to mention you are contributing nothing to society by doing so. So beeing a cocaine addict is fine because you contribute to society by beeing more productive because of it? You have a really fucked up way looking at live.
I'm confused that you decided to focus on one sentence of my post. Let me be clear that I never said being a cocaine addict is fine nor do I think that way. I was merely implying that the fact that no good to society comes out of heroin is another point against the drug. In other words, excluding any factors besides the good contributed to society while under the influence, I would argue that cocaine is the better drug compared to heroin, as some people might use it to get work done that benefits more than just themselves, while people use heroin solely to rot in their own euphoria. Now some people might use cocaine in ways that negatively impact society, which makes this a complicated tradeoff, but let's not get into that much detail.
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When I wake up, I look at the sunrise, take a warm shower, drink some hot coffee, life is great, no drugs involved.
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Drugs are perfectly fine to take. The moment you revolve your life around it, that's when it becomes a problem.
- Once a year I go on an Ice binge for a weekend with my friends (usually new years)
- Twice I year we go snorting lines of coke
- Few times a year I take ecstacy
- Once a week I'll get baked off weed
I still:
- Work full time
- Study and now I got my accounting degree
- Live out of home
- Pay bills, save money, buy stuff for my home and myself
- Looking for a gf
I havent tried heroin honestly, I don't plan to, but I know that once you use it - your married to it.
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On November 30 2011 15:25 Zariel wrote:Drugs are perfectly fine to take. The moment you revolve your life around it, that's when it becomes a problem. - Once a year I go on an Ice binge for a weekend with my friends (usually new years) - Twice I year we go snorting lines of coke - Few times a year I take ecstacy - Once a week I'll get baked off weed I still: - Work full time - Study and now I got my accounting degree - Live out of home - Pay bills, save money, buy stuff for my home and myself - Looking for a gf I havent tried heroin honestly, I don't plan to, but I know that once you use it - your married to it.
Too bad the bolded part happens in a large majority of cases...It's this phenomenon called "addiction."
Also, fueling drug conflict for the lose...
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EPT![[image loading]](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_jvb_zWfEPsg/S97WU199KXI/AAAAAAAAAeo/gurnjCP0x3s/s1600/heroin_hero_de.jpg)
