Not just a girl blog... an online dating blog - Page 2

On March 21 2011 23:14 Hawk wrote:
wow your profile makes you sound like a winner!!

I particularly liked the part where you specifically say you won't talk to anyone who lives at home, and then you mention how you're studying Philosophy/English and want to continue on to study law or psychology. I wonder if you'll be singing a different tune when your lib arts degree doesnt get you a job and then you take on $120k in debt to go to a crappy law school and be in the same situation again + hopless debt


try being a little less swarmy

On March 22 2011 01:20 Hawk wrote:
except most people who say that are actually well off or on the way to being so (not that it's any less douchy or logically flawed that living at home = a lack of a maturity). Meanwhile, you're an undergrad in a joke liberal arts major, with intentions becoming either a social worker or a broke ass, unemployed lawyer

nothing screams maturity like writing a douchy profile in a shitty apartment that's balancing upon a mountain of debt! wooooo!!!

On March 22 2011 01:27 shinosai wrote:


I have zero debt, and a pretty nice apartment. I am financially responsible and pay all my bills on time. Now, I'm also glad that you predicted failure for me with your future predicting skills, it's always good to know that anyone with the intentions of going to law school is going to be broke. I mean, damn, I'm going to stop messaging girls that are majoring in English or philosophy. They have a joke major and aren't going anywhere. Thanks for letting me know what I really need to disqualify in my profile.

On March 21 2011 13:34 shinosai wrote:

Teamliquid is harsh, heh. I've had other friends tell me they laughed when they read my profile. But I guess to the average person I didn't come off the right way.

On March 22 2011 01:27 shinosai wrote:


I have zero debt, and a pretty nice apartment. I am financially responsible and pay all my bills on time. Now, I'm also glad that you predicted failure for me with your future predicting skills, it's always good to know that anyone with the intentions of going to law school is going to be broke. I mean, damn, I'm going to stop messaging girls that are majoring in English or philosophy. They have a joke major and aren't going anywhere. Thanks for letting me know what I really need to disqualify in my profile.

Should any potential reader, upon witnessing the breadth and scope of this profile, through a lack of interest or by absence of motivation, fail to devote a reasonable period of time in an attempt to fully review its contents, said reader may forfeit any expectation of interest on behalf of the profile’s creator unless the reader proves him or herself to be of above average physical attractiveness, intelligence, creativity or an acceptable ratio of all aforementioned qualities as deemed by the creator with significant weight and consideration given to attractiveness with regard to provided photographic documentation.

"There's nothing worse than being ordinary, except a kitten falling into a well and drowning just out of your reach."

I try hard to appear nice, and I’m totally not sarcastic at all! I will not let you forget this.

I enjoy having fun. Wow, I bet you've never heard that before. What an odd thing to say. You can't have fun and not enjoy it. Do you enjoy masturbating, too? I just can't get through my day without masturbating. It's so amazing.

I spend a lot of time on internet forums. Watching sports or going to a bar, not so much. I try to live a healthy lifestyle, which includes exercising and eating food branded “real food”. I know it’s not a popular opinion, but I think music is awesome!

What I’m doing with my life
I am still in college, getting a degree in Philosophy or English or something. After that, the plan is to get a degree in Law or psychology or something. The future is a long ways off and I haven’t really fleshed it out much yet, and that’s just, like, my opinion, man.

I’m really good at
I'm good at philosophizing, writing, being sarcastic, and noticing irony. Can you imagine having 2000 spoons, when all you need is a knife? I can.

I'm good at video games. I guess that makes me a bit of a nerd, and I'm okay with that. I understand things like “xbox” might seem out of place on a college campus, but I’m not ashamed of who I am.

The first things people usually notice about me
That I'm sarcastic and smart, because I wear T-shirts with sayings that would indicate this so that people notice it before they notice things like my face, fashion sense or hygiene.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Mystery, philosophical
Things like Dan Brown finding the Da Vinci Code or solving mysteries.

Movies: Horror, intelligent comedy, the occasional romantic film as long as its not too cheesy. Examples: Scary Movie 4, Fast and Furious, Pulp Fiction. Maid in Manhattan, Boondock Saints. Fiddler on the Roof.

"There's too much beauty to quit." – P. Diddy, Ma$e and Black Rob

TV: Joss Whedon, Show Time. That takes care of most of them. Scrubs, Lie to Me. I don’t watch much TV because that seems like something intellectually actualized people wouldn’t do.

Music: Techno, Rock, as long as it isn't rap we're good. All that crazy fast talking with rhymes makes me nervous, like a crime might break out.

The six things I could never do without
A lot of times you can just skip to this section without even reading a profile to get a good measure of how interesting someone is. Just scroll down past the wall of text and check to see if the person lists food, water, and shelter. Wow, you know how to not die. That's HOT! Since I actually enjoy going out on dates with people that aren't dead, would you like to go get some coffee? Oh, what, was this paragraph too snarky and confrontational for you? Big whoop, who cares? Not me. (Did you get it? That was my sense of humor).

Here's the things I can't live without:
Computer with an internet connection. I will get rid of you or anyone else who gets between me and the internet.
Bottled water for my amazing health, because regular water is for fat people. Also, I’m staunchly “pro-litter,” but if you are hot and against littering I can change that.
My music which gives me the motivation to do things in life (except become a professional musician, don’t worry).
Good company. I would loosely define this as “people I know on the internet and a few old RL friends.”

That about sums me up. Only need four things to survive! I'm so much better than everyone else, make sure you remember that.

I spend a lot of time thinking about
The silliness of some match making questions. Seriously, they're funny if you think about them. Like airline peanuts. Who are they trying to keep out of those things? I have lots of funny things to say.

On a more serious note, how to tell when people are lying, and the nature of the world. Also, I like to think about how great it would be to cure all major diseases, and that I would love to end suffering. I can be a serious person, and enjoy things like poetry and commitment. Global warming and cooling are big on my mind.

Less serious... Wondering why it's so difficult for people to use a blinker when they're changing lanes, how Scientology manages to still have followers, and about how Tim Roth is an amazing actor. Do you like any or all of those things? Did you ever notice how much they play Saving Private Ryan on TNT? Isn’t that wacky? Also, don’t you love cat videos on youtube and writing about your feelings? It feels good to cut loose.

On a typical Friday night I am
Friday night, I am at home chilling out. It is the end of the week and it's my relaxation time. Plus I have to work tomorrow, get off my case, I don’t have to prove anything to you.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I am happy with the way my past relationships have turned out. Everything is a learning experience and each person has taught me new things about myself. My greatest weakness? Sometimes I think I’m a little too loveable, and sometimes I just care too much.

I’m looking for

Girls who like guys or will settle for a guy
Ages 18-26
Near me
For: new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, one awkward date, splitting a bill at applebees

You should message me if

1) You believe in equality for everyone but aren’t going to ask me to do much in the way of protesting or making an actual difference.
2) You are awesome, like Chuck Norris jokes and Dane Cook.
3) You are witty and sarcastic. Nothing better! (just kidding, there are plenty of things better, like the things labeled 1 and 2)
4)You want to make a new friend with whom you may one day find yourself drunk or desperate enough to fool around with.
5) You'd rather read a book than go to a football game, because I hate populist things and love intellectual pursuits.

You should probably not message me if:

1) You live with your parents. Sorry, college students who live at home. That’s gross.
2) You didn't read. I’ll know, because I’m going to passive-aggressively quiz you if you message me.
3) You think movies in general are boring, even though generally most movies are boring.
4) You are insane. I know, it probably shouldn't have to be said, but I figure this works kind of like how if you ask a cop if he’s a cop, he has to tell you, right?

That’s just a rough idea of what I'm looking for... but I am open minded... message me if you dare!

On March 22 2011 03:17 JackMcCoy wrote:
I re-wrote your profile with an emphasis on clarity and honesty. Now, go catch those fish!

The silliness of some match making questions. Seriously, they're funny if you think about them. Like airline peanuts. Who are they trying to keep out of those things? I have lots of funny things to say.

Your profile description is absolutely amazing. I think I'm going to translate it to German, adapt it a little and use it myself!

edit: To clarify: I'm not judging your personality in any way, it just reads very well, like it's going to have an encouraging effect on women.

On March 22 2011 12:13 MoltkeWarding wrote:
Usually tl.net is fairly good at the business of criticism, but in this instance, everyone has read shinosai wrong.

The genius of shinosai's profile is that its tone functions as an automatic mechanism for filtering out bad mates- mates who are overbearingly cynical, sarcastic, critical, or prefer to kick a man when he's down.

For the only sort of woman who would ever entertain a response to his profile is that superior being who freely and willingly offers a sympathetic ear to the awkward, a loving shoulder to the desperate, and an outstreched hand to the grasping.

The fact that it failed the tl.net test of merit is the proof that it will pass the test of life.

Not to be despondent, even I initially failed to see the design in the chaos.