An individual’s most valuable asset is obviously him or herself – knowledge, skills, experience, etc. What then is the second most valuable asset one can have? To me the answer is obvious. It’s other people’s assets that indirectly become my own through friendship and acquaintance. This fact underlies the fact that so many people – including myself – answer the question “what is the most important thing you gained at college?” with something along the lines of “the people I’ve met and become friends with.” This is what truly separates the best schools from the rest, since the education content is comparable between any set of respectable institutions. A student that works his butt off at a state college can easily develop a more potent mind than the Ivy League counterpart. But that student cannot escape the handicap of being deprived of the level influence and inspiration that comes only from one’s peers.
It goes well beyond the academic scope as we age and mature. If we need expert advice we can ask our friends for referrals if they themselves aren’t the expert. When it comes time for you to seriously consider investment options, your friend who went into banking will gladly offer help and/or recommend a good manager. If you need to kill that guy who slept with your wife, you can ask Kennigit to go ninja his sorry behind (or front, if that suits your style of payback). Situations where you’d have to spend a great deal of money and time to even get the bearings straight are greatly simplified because of the mutual network of friends and acquaintances.
I say acquaintances because just ‘knowing’ someone even on the loosest terms makes it infinitely easier and more likely that they will oblige to your request. For instance, if you are a businessman and you want to get in touch with some VP you don’t know, you can ask that other VP in the same company who you’d done a little work with to contact him. I heard a story from Tim Ferris (iirc it was him) that his friend’s goal while being in a MBA program wasn’t to graduate at the head of the class, or to get into a great consulting firm; it was to call and have lunch with every single one of the businessmen whose business cards he had somehow accumulated (it was some gigantic stack) before he graduated.
Every opportunity for meeting capable individuals should be taken advantage of to the fullest. In this day and age this is no longer limited to in-person contacts. Consider for a few moments the friends you have made on TL.net alone and the mutual value you have to one another through your respective studies and expertise. Just off the top of my head I count 3 future lawyers, 9+ programmers, a handful of biologists, 2 doctors, a crap ton of engineers/physicists/mathematicians, a few great writers (hi Etter, how’s your hand doing~), 1 hair expert, probably about 15 different languages spoken, along with about a hundred degenerates to make me feel better about myself. While it sounds utterly terrible to say something like “take advantage of your acquaintances,” as long as the relationship is symbiotic and mutual it can be positively maintained, as both sides recognize the benefit of helping each other out when asked. A unique part of our community is that we have several opportunities (i.e. excuses) a year to take off our online guise and meet each other in person, be it at Blizzcon, WCG, or just random OSL finals get-togethers.
We really should stop making excuses to not come out to these ‘events’ and should strive to organize more low-key meetings locally, particularly in hotspots like the Bay area, Los Angeles, and New York. For instance, I still haven’t met Tiffany and he lives like 30 minutes away! I know it’s hard to spontaneously get together without an excuse – hence the finals meet ups and LANs tend to be popular. Honestly though through my experience you don’t even need these, because you can thoroughly enjoy yourselves by just shit-talking forum retards and have a good laugh about it. The release of SC2 – beta or for real – should become another catalyst for members to have smaller but more frequent gatherings. Seriously guys, I’ve met something on the order of 50 TL.netters in person and I can only name one guy who was unbearably annoying while the overwhelming majority were tremendous individuals.
The opportunities and benefits for each and every one of us should grow in the next 5 years as the sudden increase in disposable income will allow us to expand our range of travel significantly (although a fulltime job will make it somewhat difficult to arrange for adequate time). And as we become more ‘free’, our value proposition to others will increase dramatically as well, as we will be actually doing shit that matters for a change.
TL’s strongest attribute is its community and the strong sense of connection amongst one another that stems from the site’s intolerance against morons and the respect we have for one another (with a few exceptions of course). It is because we interact with consistent personas that we come to believe that we know ‘who’ we all are. It takes something special to feel like we know one another well without having met one another in person, and TL has captured that magic. Before being a part of this community, I could have never imagined myself meeting someone from online – yet when the opportunity presented itself, I felt no hesitation to make it happen. It’s a sentiment that I know many others share on this site, having heard from them myself.
Hence you yourself should take advantage of the tremendous opportunity that TL offers you. But in order to meet people and feel comfortable about it, you need to know the others’ persona and more importantly, they need to know yours and be confident in it. For this to happen, you need to interact with others actively – be it through discussions, writing, drawing, talking, playing, coding, flaming, joking, translating, whining, uploading. The bottom line is that you need to make yourself heard and make yourself seen. That doesn’t mean spam a thousand posts a week in live report threads – that does nothing to depict who you are as a person except that you have way too much time on your hands and your sleep pattern is messed up (like mine was during college). If you love to live report, by all means keep doing it. But without participating in something that will actually show people who you are and why they should give a two shits, you are never going to be able to form a character that people will recognize and remember. There are people with 200 posts with clearly defined personas, while there are plenty others with thousands of posts who are but vague recollections in others’ minds.
Make your time here meaningful and actually be a part of its community. Otherwise, why are you even here?
from the replies:
On December 17 2008 01:40 Xusneb wrote:
I've been a lurker for a long time so this is just from my perspective.
WHY DO I LURK?
I've been visiting TL frequently for over four years and I've only started posting recently. I didn't even make an account until a few years into my visits. I think there's a few reasons for this.
In real life, when you 'post' an opinion, you usually get a response. When I discuss a topic with a friend, there is real-time rapport as we exchange ideas. This conversation is what we're used to - this back and forth talk.
There are many differences online. On the internet, when one posts an opinion, there is a chance for a response. Someone might quote you, although more often than not it's to laugh at you or ridicule you. For less articulated individuals such as myself, my ideas may be taken out of context. Then, by the time I find out, the topic is 10 days old and closed. But the vast majority of the time, nothing happens. Noone quotes you and your opinion is not acknowledged as the later posts soon leave your ideas isolated on page 3 or something.
This is so darn different from what I'm used to. I remember I posted a bit earlier in my years thinking to myself "wow, people are gonna love this idea! I wonder how many people will share these beliefs and respond with their own stories?" However, to my disappointment, my "brilliant insight" was completely overlooked as the next posts devolved into a flame war. As this kept happening, the negative reinforcement just turned me off posting online, anywhere. What was the point? People online ignore you whereas people in real life listen to my rants and respond with rants of their own. This was my mentality as a lurker.
Personally speaking as a science major, I think our brains are hard-wired to behave a certain way. We've evolved to be used to real-life circumstances where our insatiable hunger for social acceptance is more easily appeased. Things are different online but luckily for us homo sapiens, we can adapt to new situations and environments.
Of course, the story doesn't end there. I'm typing this up and I've overcome my "lurking". One day, I just realized the internet isn't real life. There are differences, for better or for worse, and I have to just accept them. To function socially online, I realized I had to abandon my excessive real-life social needs for acknowledgment and acceptance. Actually, I also analyzed my own behaviour on these forums. I mean, as a lurker, I'm part of the problem. I'm not acknowledging people! Too often, I just read their comments, think "wow, that was interesting", and move on. I could have easily quoted the man and commented "thanks for sharing!". Bam, problem solved. Plus, I realized that everytime I post something, people will read it. TL has a large community and I'm sure someone will read my post even if they don't physically acknowledge it with a quote or comment. Knowing that 1) online isn't real life; 2) I'm part of the problem; and 3) people are reading my posts, has really helped me shed my lurking skin.
So to the lurkers that share my views, I advise you to post. If a topic irks you, post your opinion. If someone says something completely wrong about something, don't be afraid to correct him with your expert knowledge. If you feel you have something more to add to a topic, add it! You may not get acknowledged all the time like in real life but you will be getting through to real people.
Anyways, this is all opinion. I hope someone reads it!
I've been a lurker for a long time so this is just from my perspective.
WHY DO I LURK?
I've been visiting TL frequently for over four years and I've only started posting recently. I didn't even make an account until a few years into my visits. I think there's a few reasons for this.
In real life, when you 'post' an opinion, you usually get a response. When I discuss a topic with a friend, there is real-time rapport as we exchange ideas. This conversation is what we're used to - this back and forth talk.
There are many differences online. On the internet, when one posts an opinion, there is a chance for a response. Someone might quote you, although more often than not it's to laugh at you or ridicule you. For less articulated individuals such as myself, my ideas may be taken out of context. Then, by the time I find out, the topic is 10 days old and closed. But the vast majority of the time, nothing happens. Noone quotes you and your opinion is not acknowledged as the later posts soon leave your ideas isolated on page 3 or something.
This is so darn different from what I'm used to. I remember I posted a bit earlier in my years thinking to myself "wow, people are gonna love this idea! I wonder how many people will share these beliefs and respond with their own stories?" However, to my disappointment, my "brilliant insight" was completely overlooked as the next posts devolved into a flame war. As this kept happening, the negative reinforcement just turned me off posting online, anywhere. What was the point? People online ignore you whereas people in real life listen to my rants and respond with rants of their own. This was my mentality as a lurker.
Personally speaking as a science major, I think our brains are hard-wired to behave a certain way. We've evolved to be used to real-life circumstances where our insatiable hunger for social acceptance is more easily appeased. Things are different online but luckily for us homo sapiens, we can adapt to new situations and environments.
Of course, the story doesn't end there. I'm typing this up and I've overcome my "lurking". One day, I just realized the internet isn't real life. There are differences, for better or for worse, and I have to just accept them. To function socially online, I realized I had to abandon my excessive real-life social needs for acknowledgment and acceptance. Actually, I also analyzed my own behaviour on these forums. I mean, as a lurker, I'm part of the problem. I'm not acknowledging people! Too often, I just read their comments, think "wow, that was interesting", and move on. I could have easily quoted the man and commented "thanks for sharing!". Bam, problem solved. Plus, I realized that everytime I post something, people will read it. TL has a large community and I'm sure someone will read my post even if they don't physically acknowledge it with a quote or comment. Knowing that 1) online isn't real life; 2) I'm part of the problem; and 3) people are reading my posts, has really helped me shed my lurking skin.
So to the lurkers that share my views, I advise you to post. If a topic irks you, post your opinion. If someone says something completely wrong about something, don't be afraid to correct him with your expert knowledge. If you feel you have something more to add to a topic, add it! You may not get acknowledged all the time like in real life but you will be getting through to real people.
Anyways, this is all opinion. I hope someone reads it!