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I don't know why, but I'm going to post a blog about a girl like everyone else here does.
I knew her for a while, we go to the same church, she's cute, fobby even though she's been in America for like 5 years. I never had any interest in her but alot of other guys did and still do.
Anyway, we're cool and stuff and then somehow she says we're married. Of course, its a joke, I play along, I think it started because a friend of mine and a girl he likes started it so we kinda did too. I didn't think it would last long, just like a one time deal but it kept going and soon I actually was interested in her. I guess I'm insecure or really up tight (something I shouldn't be) but I get like angry when other guys are talking to her and I know I shouldn't be, but its not like I get mad at them or anything. She always tells me she loves me, but if you say it in korean, its kinda more like a friendly way. One day she tells me that a guy asked her out and I asked what her response was and she said no, I have you (referring to myself) I was sorta suprised, I knew that guy and they were always talking, at least on facebook. She's probably kidding about why she said no anyway. This girl is pretty popular around the korean population, where I live there's not too many. She went out with older guys, one guy was super rich and the other guy was like a bi polar dude but he's cool.
And now for some reason around the same time I was starting to like her, I stopped masturbating, something I thought I could not stop and I'll probably start again soon. it's only been like a week but the last time I did it was while watching porn. Then I just stop, its been long and hard but I think I can keep it up. I also started working out more, nothing too much but I got a set of benches for 15 bucks from a guy going off to college so I've been using that.
Although I criticized that sqwert dude in the other blog about him being emo about that girl he likes, I feel like I'm in a similar situation. He likes that girl alot and feels that if it doesnt work out now, its over. She keeps playing around, I don't know if she's serious. But I'm not gonna stop being friends with her if it doesnt work out, it probably wont work out between us anyway. There are so many other guys waiting for her, all well.
/end venting
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I guess this is one of those girl mixed message schemes ;o XD lilsusie should be able to help you decipher whether she really means what she says!
ugh, girls
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Then I just stop, its been long and hard but I think I can keep it up.
wat
well, good luck~!
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On September 03 2008 14:14 paper wrote:wat well, good luck~!
LMAO I just realized its like a pun. lmoa lmoa lmao
ROFLROFL
thanks
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Yeah, I vote we get some english translations from her actions by lilsusie.
Seriously though, I feel you. I don't think you should put too much into the relationship though. As my good english teacher always said, "When dating a women, always keep a part of you inside." That way if she breaks your heart, you still have your core that you can cling to. The core that you know is yourself.
But fuck it, what do I know, I'm the one who got heartbroken by one girl for a year. I still haven't gotten everything together yet. :/
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It sounds like you basically have a really big crush on the girl. I know it's obvious, but that's the point.
Don't fret man. Everyone has been in that situation with that type of girl. I was, and it didn't go very well. I guess the crush/relationship gets more complicated when you feel like you have a solid chance with her. I felt like that, because she led me on.
I was a emotional wreak for months my Junior year of High School, and looking back at it I regret putting so much effort into trying to make the relationship work. I know it's hard, but you're going to have to really put it into perspective.
If you feel you honestly care deeply about her. Go for it, but don't be surprised if she doesn't feel the same way. In another perspective this could be a temporary infatuation that will eventually pass.
I feel your vent though man. It's reminding me of the past. I actually came to terms with my feelings with the girl, and I still talk to her on AIM occasionally. I don't care about her anymore like that, she's just a friend.
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paper, nice catch hahahahaa
if it was intentional, then, amazing
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3861 Posts
i'd love to try and interpret but girls like her even confuse me. the ones who play with you and dont tell you anything up front. it's like a defense mechanism, ya know? she's testing waters on you and kinda with you until she either 1) finds something better 2) figures out that she's got you wrapped around her finger or 3) gets bored.
i'd say for you to hold onto your heart on this one.
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Some girls flirt just for the hell of it but I don't think she's like that.
If you had to make me decide I'd say that she wouldn't mind going out with you. Not like she specifically wants to go out with you, but she'd feel comfortable being your girlfriend. But please, don't take my word for it.
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thats the kind of girl im talking about in my blog
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Ok thanks guys and girl, I read everyones comment. Helping alot.
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And another thing, one day we will talk for a long time and just have fun and the next time we meet, she doesn't talk at all. Makes me disapointed, like what is she really thinking? I get happy then hurt and it always ends in a bad way.
On September 03 2008 14:50 sqwert wrote: thats the kind of girl im talking about in my blog
Yeah doesnt it suck yet feel good at the same time.
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3861 Posts
i really think she's kinda stringing you along. maybe she's doing that because she thinks that you dont like her in that way? so you're kind of some safety net or a conquest of some sort? is she the "tee hee 오빠, 이거사줘~" type?
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if you're her "husband" then ask her to go out on a date... because you can say you haven't been out on one in years since you got married.
depending on how she takes it (in that specific situation) or when you actually go out on the "date" you can see if she's actually interested... i ASSUME you can read body language (?)... then you should have your answer unless she's naturally just flirty with everyone. in that case, you actually have to use conversation to figure it out (which is harder unfortunately). But in general, you can tell for the most part through body language....
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On September 03 2008 14:58 lilsusie wrote: i really think she's kinda stringing you along. maybe she's doing that because she thinks that you dont like her in that way? so you're kind of some safety net or a conquest of some sort? is she the "tee hee 오빠, 이거사줘~" type?
Yeah, maybe. I am like a year younger than her but we're in the same grade. What do you mea im a safety net or a coquest? She's not really like that to me but she's kinda like that to older guys, she is like those I'm always a cute fob type girl, if you know what I mean, she really is pretty.
Btw her bdays coming up, maybe I should buy her something.
On September 03 2008 15:07 eshlow wrote: if you're her "husband" then ask her to go out on a date... because you can say you haven't been out on one in years since you got married.
depending on how she takes it (in that specific situation) or when you actually go out on the "date" you can see if she's actually interested... i ASSUME you can read body language (?)... then you should have your answer unless she's naturally just flirty with everyone. in that case, you actually have to use conversation to figure it out (which is harder unfortunately). But in general, you can tell for the most part through body language....
She doesn't really flirt that much, she gets kinda mad (probably just joking way) when I look at other girls, I kinda do it on purpose to see if she's for real or not. What sort of body language do you mean?
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:O Life always seems to be this way... Good luck, il0seonpurpose! I think you should just make a move and see what happens. If nothing does, then you can finally forget about this fool. There's no reason to wrap so many heart strings around something you don't fully understand.
What do you mea im a safety net or a coquest? She's trying to warn you not to become the person this girl goes to as second choice if her initial romantic interests don't work out. If she knows you're interested in her and isn't dropping any clues she is too, then she might just be keeping you around as back up so she can always feel like she's popular and well liked. Some people hinge their self-esteem based on whether or not they are in a relationship.
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Thanks psychotemplar, but we go to the same church and its small, dont want things to be awkward.
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3861 Posts
like.. with the other oppas, she feels that she needs to play the cute younger girl role. and maybe she feels that since they are oppas, that they would like her or that she sees them as relationship possibilties (for some reason fobby korean girls dont like dating guys younger - but that's just my own observation) but with you she feels like she can just joke around without the fear of it actually becoming anything.
i agree with eshlow, as her out on a date and first, see if she takes it as a date or just a "two of you hanging out" thing. see if she invites anyone else out. and yeah, read her body language when it's just the 2 of you.
ps: ALL girls will get jealous if you look at another woman. dont ever let them tell you otherwise. it's like, built in.
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On September 03 2008 15:11 lilsusie wrote: like.. with the other oppas, she feels that she needs to play the cute younger girl role. and maybe she feels that since they are oppas, that they would like her or that she sees them as relationship possibilties (for some reason fobby korean girls dont like dating guys younger - but that's just my own observation) but with you she feels like she can just joke around without the fear of it actually becoming anything.
i agree with eshlow, as her out on a date and first, see if she takes it as a date or just a "two of you hanging out" thing. see if she invites anyone else out. and yeah, read her body language when it's just the 2 of you.
ps: ALL girls will get jealous if you look at another woman. dont ever let them tell you otherwise.
yeah you're right and i think in general, girls like dating older guys. and why do other girls get jealous if nothings serious? like even friends get mad at that?
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Thanks psychotemplar, but we go to the same church and its small, dont want things to be awkward. Are you sure it isn't awkward already if you like her but can never say so? :O It's not such a big deal if you get rejected and have to see her again often... You will survive
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