Once upon a time it'd be from going on a losing streak but more recently I've dragged myself out of getting down about losses, I'm not perfect, I'm just some silver league British player playing on ladder. I can take losses, I look back and pick out where I went wrong or where I read my opponent wrong. For me, being able to criticise myself makes me feel quite I guess happy, it makes me realise I'm improving, it gives me something to work towards in the future.
Mentally, irl, I'm probably not in a good spot at all, I don't know to be quite honest. People I know well don't pick up any weird vibes from my behaviour yet people I don't know or whom I have just met quickly pick up on how timid I am, how I shy away from talking as much as possible. I've always had issues fixing my mentality towards certain things, I often find myself putting things off even when I've told myself I'm going to get it done that day. I'm aware of it but yet I still can't seem to shake the habit off.
I really can't figure out if it's laziness, boredom or something else and it's beginning to bug me, I really don't know how to react to my brain deciding it's kind of pumped to do something only for it to go "you know what, let's do this tomorrow" as soon as I get started. I don't understand how I can both want to play and not want to play at the same time, that's just a massive conflict that makes no sense.
So my question to you TL frequenters is this: How can I break this bad mentality? Little baby steps, brute force? Variety in what I do in SC? I pretty much play alone as I don't really know anyone else in my social circle both online and irl who really have much of an interest in the game. Being in silver league there's little in the way of clans and tournaments I can play in for fun and I'm terrible at initiating conversation with people, even on the internet and even if I do manage I can't keep a conversation going long enough to a point where I could make a "friend"
Rambling aside, advice, tips, links to fun things for a silver to do, anecdotes would be greatly appreciated. I really do want to continue enjoying this game for a long time to come.