EPTSo starting out I was born August 28, 1985 in a small city right in between Dayton and Cincinnati Ohio to a drug addict mother and father. My mother loved me though and gave up everything (or so she says) when she found out she was pregnant, although she started back up after I was born. We were poorish and my father bailed when I was 3. My mother was off of most of the hard stuff while raiseing me but I spent a ton of time with my awesome grandma. Also at this time my aunt got invested in my life and her job took off as a wood pallet saleswomen so from age 3-18 I got spoiled by my aunt and grandmother, just about whatever I wanted I got. When I was five my mother remarried and we moved to the country in time for my fourth grade. I resented my step father for this for many many years, made sure I had nothing in common with him or his children who didnt live with us but visited every other weekend. I went to a backward public school where I got straight A's mostly I believe because I could read, I found out later for the ammount of work I put in to school I didnt deserve it and wouldnt have gotten them in a good school. Anyway every other weekend and alot of the summer I would go stay at my grandmas house and get just about anything I wanted. Sundays in the fall were awesome because my aunt had season tickets for the Bengals since before I was born at first in the nose bleeds and by time I was 16 about 10 rows back from the field on the 30 yardline and she would always take me. I fell in love with football, and I was still in contact with my father a little bit amd found out he played football in a small college for a scholarship until he was kicked out for drugs.
When I was five my father had visitation rights and would take me to his friends house and I would have to go play while he shot up. While he was passed out I was mollested by his friends 18 year old son, this happened everytime we went to that house and I didn't tell a soul about it until my senior year which I will talk about later.
I knew I wanted to play football I loved to watch it I knew all the rules, but there was a problem my school didnt have football. They only had baseball and basketball. So my mom called around and found a school that had football for young kids grades 3-6 and told them I wanted to play and they letme. I was just some fat kid though had zero skills, but thats what the coaches were for and they taught me up. At the end of the year they told my mother they were sorry but the school said only people who go to that school could play there. So my mom did the coolest thing she went to my step father stood up to him and said we had to move. We didnt... But my mom opened her own business and we used that address to get me into a school that I could play football. I joined the team and started everymgame played all the time and started to get good about this time my dad came back and I saw him for the first time in 3 years and he had mostly cleaned up his life. He was going to watch my play football for the first time ever I was so excited. That morning as i was getting ready for school the phone rang my father had had a massive heart attack and passed away. I didnt go to school but still played in the game. After football was done I joined the wrestleing team as a heavyweight 215lbs in 7th grade. I went 1-4 with my only win me breaking some kids collar bone and dislocateing his shoulder
. After that was shot put and discus then summer break and off to grandmas, honestly some of my happiest days. 8th grade same thing except I got much better at wrestling going something like 18-7 still have the tournament medals.Freshman year same thing except I started to become a nerd, I started playing magic the gathering reading comic books and video games. I hung out with the nerds and when you do that you get picked on. Oh they wouldnt do it during football season I was to good, they needed me football is huge in Ohio. But after I was fair game. I went 0-23 in wrestleing as a 215lb. Sophmore year was much the same except I exploded in size before I prided myself on technique not power to do well in football. And then I hit puberity which was late, I wemt from benching 135lbs my freshman year to 305lbs my sophmore, I could leg press over 1000lbs. But my weight went up as a result. For wrestling I had to stay at 215 because there was a senior at 285. But my body just wasnt that size anymore and we had a new coach who was a huge dick and told me if I wasnt 215 I would never wrestle and proceded to give me water pills to cut. Once we had a match the next day and I was 27lbs overweight. I was wrapped in plastic wrap a garbage bag and given water pills and put in the humid pool room and told to run until I fell down. I did and I made weight lost my matches and quit wrestling, that was the last time I ever wrestled. After this kids started picking on me hardcore. I was in fights against 6-7 kids weekly. They wouldnt fight me 1 on 1 I was to big. My mom knew there was a problem and sent me to live with my grandma. My aunt paid for me to go to a catholic school I was 15 and ready to go. That summer I signed up for the football team. Did summer workouts and was set to go, so funny you are the fat kid who cant play until you get pads. I went from 5th on a depth chart to the starter in a day lol. I had a coach who played at Purdue university and he told me I was good enough to play D-1 ball. I was so happy he promised he would set up some scouts to watch me play.
August 15, 2001 would change my life forever. I was 15, 13 days before my birthday. My aunt had just bought me a new Ford Explorer for my 16th birthday. I had just finished football practice came home my grandma was cooking, pork roast and gravy, potato dumplings, and saurkraut. I had showered and eat. And decided to play some xbox before sleep. Then it happened I got the worst pain in my side and vomited uncontrollably, my aunt freaked out called 911 and I was taken to the hospital, they thought I had kidney stones gave me some pain meds and it felt better. 2 days later same thing, this time they put a kidney stint in. I tube shoved up my penis that would make me piss blood causeing me to get blood clots and clog the stint. On September 11, 2011 I got my drivers lisence. I was the first test in the morning 8:30 am just after the second plane hit before the towers fell. I remember the tester listening to the radio while takeing the test. I got a perfect score and they printed up my drivers liscence and as I walked out they told everyone that all government buildings were now closed. I still have the card.
Over the next two months I went through 5 kidney stints when finally in August my Doctor said I didnt have kidney stones, I still had bad pain so into the hospital for a week for tests whena doctor said well maybe its your gall bladder. So he took it out. Wasnt my gall baldder. 4 days after I had surgery I had pain and vomiting again my mom called the doctor and asked what she should do. "Maam there is nothing I can do for your son you need to take him to a different Hospital." My mom asked what hospital he would recommend and he said he wasnt allowed to refer one. So we drove to Cincinnati childrens hospital were I was told they didnt know what was wrong. I was put into a pain management clinic for children, where the doctor thought I didnt have pain and was lieing to get pain meds. So he never gave me medicine and I had to get his permission to go to the ER for pain. This went on for a year.
At this point you should know because of my mother and fathers drug habbits up until this day I have never done 1 illegal drug, never tried weed or someone elses meds. I have been around it, my best friends all smoked weed, but never once tried to pressure me into smokeing.
My football career was over, I played one game my Junior year, missed a whole year of school had to redo my junior year where I was home schooled. And every so often they would do a test to find out what was wrong with me, and finally something showed up. My pancreas was messed up. I was 17 and they told me I was a adult problem and set me up with the University hospital and a GI doctor. Over the next few months I would have miltiple sugeries to help my pain. There is no cure for what I have short of takeing out my pancreas. There are surgerys I could have to help the pain a little bit and I had them, includeing a surgery where they deflate my lung and cut nerves. After they did this my lung collapsed again and I spent another week in the hospital. Lucky at this time my mom was a school bus driver and while the pay was shit the insurance was the best. So UC hospital has a hidden top floor where the rooms are huge and like a 5 star hotel and that is where I stayed.
During this time my catholic school that I went a total of like 40 days was incredibly supportive and made me feel like I went there my entire life. I went back there for my senior year and graduated in 2004. Our principle was a priest and was the coolest priest I have ever met. The first priest I heard curse also. We had a 4 day retreat and Father Chuck was the first person I ever told I was mollested. I missed half my days of school my senior year, and the days I went I would come late and leave early. I was accepted into the university of Cincinnati, but at this point I was getting a tolerance to my pain meds and they were getting ramped up constantly. When I graduated high school I was on 250mcg duragesic fentynal patchs.
After graduation I had to finish one class in summer school to get my diploma. And right before it started I went into the hospital for pain got medicine and stopped breathing. I had a blood clot in my lung, I had to have CPR and adrenalin injected into my heart twice. 2 weeks in the hospital on blood thinners afrer I was out I got my diploma and moved to the UC. I got a dorm room that was only me on the top floor of the freshman dorm. I didnt go to classes, I thought I could do the same as high school and just not go to class. And still get bye, I was wrong, I failed all of my classes. A huge let down to my family a huge let down to me. So next semester I tried to go, I really did but I wemt through a bad stretch where I wemt to the hospitak often and again failed all of my classes. I found out before the end of the semester and attempted suicide. I put on my patches and to 70 5mg percocets washing it down with nightquil. I wanted to die, I felt my life was only going to be pain, I wasnt going to finish college and I was in areally bad place. Well I didnt fall asleep for 12 hours later, and woke up the next day with a hangover. This is the first time I have told anybody. After this I dropped out and got on social security.
I tried to dedicate my life to become good at something would get better than alot of people and then quit or change to something when I realized I couldnt be the best. MtG made day 2 of a grand prix and a few ptq top 8s. Poker up about 10k lifetime, then the govenrment shutdowns. And SC2.
Then I met my fiance online. We met hit it off she loves me and we decided to have on child after dateing over 1 year. With my sickness and her work we thought if we have 1 kid we could handle the responseability. She is from Thailand but has a greencard, and is a designer. After a few months of trying we finally got pregnant, and foundmout we were haveing twins, so much for haveing only one baby. Copying from older blog now.
I am American but I met a Thai woman and we started dating. After a few months thing were serious and we decided we would like to have children. Soon after she was pregnant. We were SOOOOO happy. Now I am disabled and on social security. So I stay at home. Our plan was for the most part was for me to be a stay at home dad. Then she decided that she would like to have the baby in Thailand close to her family. Ok I thought that is fine... Then we find out she is pregnant with twins. Awesome. So around 6 months pregnant we fly to Bangkok and stay with her family.
Everything was great the food was great, I had to buy insurance for myself so I could get my medicine but other than that it was all good.Then the floods came. I am scared even though the floods never came to our home, we were still somewhat affected as food prices went up. But that was ok we still had enough money to pay for the birth at a nice private hospital. The floods finally went away mid November and she is 8 months pregnant. On December 1st we go to the Mall to see Twilight. (yes I know, not my idea) We come home around 10 pm and she goes to the restroom and her water breaks. Ok I tell her we have to go to the hospital. We go and get there and they look and the babies are not in a position to be born naturally. Which is something we were expecting so no big deal. Now this is my first children and I am extremely nervous and excited. Now I was expecting to be able to go into the room with her and hold her hand but no such luck.
On December 2nd, 2011 at 12:36 and 12:37 am Jacob and Junior Pate were born.
They wheel the babies out in front of me but something is wrong they are running. Whats wrong, but they don't speak English. One baby is 1.5 kilograms and the other 1.9 kilograms. But that isn't the problem one is having trouble breathing.I am not allowed to see them or anything, my fiance is still in recovery, I have no Idea what is going on. About one hour later the doctor calls me and need to talk to me. Junior the smaller baby is doing fine, his weight is a concern but not a big one. Jacob on the other hand has a very rare syndrome called Freeman-Sheldon Syndrome. Both arms and legs are deformed. His mouth is deformed, and he cannot suck. Also when he drinks milk it comes back up his throat and down his windpipe causing him to choke. He chokes every single day now and has completely stopped breathing about 5 times now, it is very stressful. Also he is at a good hospital, my insurance doesn't cover it. As of now, he is still in the hospital on oxygen with a tube in his stomach to feed him with. Also the medical bills are now over $10,000 and I have already payed $7,500 with help from my family and hers. Now I spend most of my time applying for loans and credit cards. Now the doctor tells me he is no longer sure how he can help an has never seen this syndrome before so I have to find a way to transport him to the US.
Jacob spent the first two months of his life in a privite hospital in Bankok before spending four more in a public hospital because my bank account ran dry and I could no longer afford the $150 usd or so a day. I dont want to say to much bad but even the private hospital in Bangkok pales in compairison to the hospitals in the USA. The public was a nightmare to be honest, incompatent doctors, old equipment, lack of staff, lack of medicine. Jacob had to have a G-tube placed for feeding and a trach for breathing. The while in the hospital they didnt feed him much and he never got over 4 kg.
Once he was home we didnt have the nessasary equipment to properly take care of him, but we did the best we could, but he still would get infections and have to go back to the hospital. One night he rolled over and pulled his trach out. I was saving money at the time to get plane tickets. Mid October I got tickets to Cincinnati. Before the flight Jacob got a small fever we gave him some tylenol and thought nothing of it. We got to the airport and they wouldnt let ustakehis suction machine on the plane, because he cant swollow all of his saliva goes into his treachea makeing it hard for him to breathe and it has to be suctioned out often.
So we used a red bulb for suctioning a babys nose, the entire flight. Then he vomited on the plane and we had to suction him with that red bulb, we were so afraid he was going to choke but he was ok. After 26 hours on planes and in airports we landed in Dayton and drove to Cincinnati Childrens Hospital. When we went into the ER they rushed him in he had a 105F temp. He spent 2 months in the hospital. And while still disfigured, haveing to be fed through a tube and a hole in his neck he is much better and things are looking up.
Jacob and Junior are now 19 months old. Junior is smart and loves dogs. Jacob is doing much better and our debt is slowly but surely going down. We are currently back in Thailand and Jacob is next to me in the bed sleeping. We will be back to the states soon.
If you read to the end thanks for reading. I know I ended it fast but I am tired.
