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I thought she was joking the first timed she exclaimed, "Teach me guitar!" Actually, she might have thought that she was joking too, as she greeted my affirmative response with a wide-eyed, "really?" I reassured her that I'd be more than happy to teach her, and so we decided to go to my house that afternoon for our guitar lesson. This was actually not our first lesson, strictly speaking. A few weeks prior I had taught her a few chords at a clarinet section hangout, while the rest of the section happily watched The Five Year Engagement (which is a fucking awful movie, sometimes being the only dude in the section can be a real bitch). That had gone reasonably well; while she didn't really remember anything I taught her, she laughed all the times I wanted her to laugh, and what's really important here anyways? So after school we drove back to her place to pick up her guitar, and then to my house. Along the way we chatted about the inauguration and how excited she was to go (she was an Obama campaign volunteer who cried on election night). Additionally, we reminisced about the lunch period we had shared the previous year. Her recollection was pleasantly romanticized, and made it sound like our table was full of healthy disagreement and vibrant discussion. Alternatively, I seem to only remember her getting pissed at me for disagreeing with her all the time; I decided that it would be prudent not to share my version. When we got to my house we got right down to the important things, not guitar, silly, snacks. I cut us up a grapefruit to share, and put some water on the stove for tea. When I offered her tea, she initially recoiled with an emphatic, "No!" but immediately afterwards she relented, saying that she wanted to try new things. When she tried her first sip of the tea (peach black) she crinkled her nose in disgust, but told me it tasted fine. I told her that it was completely fine if she didn't like it, but she insisted that she would drink the rest of it. When we finished eating our grapefruit halves, we finally sat down with our guitars to begin in earnest. We started off reviewing the chords that I had taught he the previous time. She didn't remember much, but that was fine by me. Every time I taught her a new chord, she giggled and said that she needed to review the ones that she already learned, to which I gladly obliged. By the end of the lesson, I managed teach her a few progressions, her favorite being a kind of gimmicky Spanish-sounding one (A minor to E major, repeat indefinitely whilst imagining a gallant, red-clad matador heroically fighting a raging bull in front of an adoring crowd). As she walked out the door, she shot a hasty, "kthxbye," at me, almost as though she was the one who spends almost all her free time on the internet. A few days ago she messaged me on facebook saying, among other things, that she wants to have another lesson. I really like this girl, wish me luck!
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Come on man... Girl blogs have to be filled with awkward convo, and you being real creepy... Try again later
But seriously, good luck!
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On February 04 2013 14:27 AWagg wrote:Come on man... Girl blogs have to be filled with awkward convo, and you being real creepy... Try again later But seriously, good luck! Yeah, this whole thing came off as a little less fluid than it was in real life. lol. It wasn't actually that wierd.
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Cute! Hope things work out how you want them to.
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Well I'm not a chick but I'd like to be taught guitar too! :<
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You sound good for each other, have fun :D
Such a cute girl blog hehehe :3
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Did you put ur arms around her and show her first hand how to play the chords. If not then your a noob.
jk, gl with da girl
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On February 04 2013 15:45 MysteryMeat1 wrote: Did you put ur arms around her and show her first hand how to play the chords. If not then your a noob.
jk, gl with da girl
Oh shit I should use this.
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Seeker
Where dat snitch at?36902 Posts
Not your typical girl blog. In fact, this is one of the rare cutesy ones.
I am not impressed :/
BUT! Good job. Wishing you the best of luck!
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Here's the thing, mate.
You can play the slow-dance of awkward social interaction with they-who-hold-your-heart-in-a-vice-like-grip. You can. We've all danced that motherfucking dance. It can go for awhile. A long-ass time. Anywhere from weeks to months to years. Trust me on the years thing. Twirling, twirling into fizzled-out nothingness because you were both too pussy to do anything ever always.
You can replay the E-major moment over and over again, making connections between it and shit swimming around in your head - which you're clearly doing with this passionate Spanish-esque subtext, you transparent window you - until it becomes like a Taylor Swift song you can't budge from your brain meats if your life depended on it.
But let me tell you something, random person on TL. Let me tell you what women appreciate. Honesty.
I'm not telling you to go full alpha. I'm not telling you to bash her over the head with your figurative club and drag her to your nerd cave. But you gotta be straight about it, man. Just make a move already.
Women don't drink peach tea and eat passion fruit with just anyone, while emphatically stating they want to try new things. Like, what the hell, dude? You need a neon sign over her head saying 'TAKE ME NOW'?
Life's too short. You're young and intelligent and like video games - that makes you at least a moderately decent human being. Quit daydreaming about her fingers on your guitar (NAA'SAYIN?!) and take a risk.
That's what makes life grand - the risks. If she's into it, great. If not, you've grown as a person, you're better for the experience, you can listen to 30 Seconds To Mars because THEY GET YOU and you can validate eating ice-cream for a few days.
BOTH SOUND GREAT, RIGHT?!
+ Show Spoiler +For the record, though, y'all will never get married if you have deep, differing political beliefs. Sorry. I break hearts. But you can still kiss her and whatever. I encourage it.
Get amongst it. Don't even afraid. I believe in you. #YOLOSWAG2013
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Shit, SunsetSC2 knows what this is all about. Best advice ever
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On February 04 2013 19:12 Seeker wrote: Not your typical girl blog. In fact, this is one the rare cutesy ones.
I am not impressed :/
BUT! Good job. Wishing you the best of luck! The cuteness of this blog makes me think that this relationship isn't completely doomed to fail once it gets started and this guy has some hope of getting the girl. I am dissapoint.
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On February 04 2013 22:09 SunsetSC2 wrote:Here's the thing, mate. You can play the slow-dance of awkward social interaction with they-who-hold-your-heart-in-a-vice-like-grip. You can. We've all danced that motherfucking dance. It can go for awhile. A long-ass time. Anywhere from weeks to months to years. Trust me on the years thing.Twirling, twirling into fizzled-out nothingness because you were both too pussy to do anything ever always. You can replay the E-major moment over and over again, making connections between it and shit swimming around in your head - which you're clearly doing with this passionate Spanish-esque subtext, you transparent window you - until it becomes like a Taylor Swift song you can't budge from your brain meats if your life depended on it. But let me tell you something, random person on TL. Let me tell you what women appreciate. Honesty.I'm not telling you to go full alpha. I'm not telling you to bash her over the head with your figurative club and drag her to your nerd cave. But you gotta be straight about it, man. Just make a move already. Women don't drink peach tea and eat passion fruit with just anyone, while emphatically stating they want to try new things. Like, what the hell, dude? You need a neon sign over her head saying 'TAKE ME NOW'? Life's too short. You're young and intelligent and like video games - that makes you at least a moderately decent human being. Quit daydreaming about her fingers on your guitar (NAA'SAYIN?!) and take a risk. That's what makes life grand - the risks. If she's into it, great. If not, you've grown as a person, you're better for the experience, you can listen to 30 Seconds To Mars because THEY GET YOU and you can validate eating ice-cream for a few days. BOTH SOUND GREAT, RIGHT?! + Show Spoiler +For the record, though, y'all will never get married if you have deep, differing political beliefs. Sorry. I break hearts. But you can still kiss her and whatever. I encourage it. Get amongst it. Don't even afraid. I believe in you. #YOLOSWAG2013
Do you ever lay down the whiskey ?! Great post 10/10, your post is a nice big titanium bat to the unsuspecting cranium.
To the brohan in question, stop pettyfooting (is that a word?) around the issue. You like her, at least make your advances more clear.
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Sweet, sweet music.
Take a more physical approach - help her finger her chords right, amongst other things. At the same time, you can achieve greater flow in these guitar-teaching-sessions with something like this:
1. Introduction
Most things in the world deserve a proper introduction. An intimidate musicians' date disguised as an innocent guitar lesson? Yes, yes it needs a good introduction. I see that this is happening right in the comfort of your home. Good, so I'm going to call the moment she walks in the door until the time she strikes the first chord on the guitar the introduction. What you have here (in the OP) is some graceful tea time. That is very fine indeed, and I would not dare advise against, but why not enhance? Spice it up with home-made cookies, while an easily-recognizable guitar-oriented music from something you two share in common (movie / anime / etc.) plays in the background.
Or, you can skip most of this and go straight for the guitar part. Ohhh yes I dare you. You can skip it all, as long as...
2. The Lesson
Already the main part? Why the grand introduction if this is only going to have 3 parts? We'll see about that, but lets talk about the lesson. This is the main dish, no doubt. This is the title of the thinly veiled date that validates such intimate encounter without the (awkward at this point) social implications. You hold the position of the superior in this entire section. You are the teacher, she is the student. Exercise that authority to the fullest while she is too dazzled to notice. Hmmm, a somewhat similar scene would be where Christine goes down to Phantom's cave and they're singing that duet and Phantom is all like SING FOR ME and she is singing those high notes and yeah you get what I mean.
In other words, the lesson is in your hands. You have full control. The number one priority is to make it fun. I think she's already into you (girls don't readily walk into your man-cave for the sole purpose of learning an instrument), but we are assuming that like all good men in the world you are a thickhead and are completely blind to the neon signs blazing all around her flashing 'take me' (like the poster above said). So make it fun - and show that you're enjoying this too! It sucks when one person is having fun and the other is obviously not. Making it mutually enjoyable is the key aspect of the lesson.
3. The Talent
Chicks dig talent. Not all talent are equal, but in general musical talent ranks pretty high. You show it to her man. Not in a crowd setting or a concert or whatever, you show it to her and just for her. The one-on-one dimension makes it special, you don't (and shouldn't) say cheesy lines like "hey babe this is from my heart to yours". I repeat, DON'T say cheesy lines. Naturally lead into it. You know, maybe play a couple chords together then when she needs a break, you will just casually strum a couple then realize (be a good actor) that this sounds like this song you used to love to play which went something like... and there we go.
The harder part is what happens after your dazzling performance. The worst is when you sit there like an idiot and grin at your own talent (what an amazing guitarist you are!) and she's sitting there going like wtf. You need a smooth transition. Keep it simple, a line or two about how she'll be able to play this in a few weeks or "since I played my favourite song, why not give it a shot at your favourite?"
4. Getting Personal
She says her favourite song but it's too hard to play it. You ask her to look it up on Youtube. You sit there, with her, just you two. There is music, and two hearts beating closer to each other than ever before. Oh fuck I'm going into my fic-writing realm again...
Bring personal connections to this lovely musical session. Her favourite, your favourite, something you heard together, something from school, movie, radio, etc. Then, bring that to a new level. Play it for her, then play it together. She was having fun and dazzled earlier, now she is completely absorbed.
5. The Next Step
This is the hard part, and this is where I stop my half-fantasy advice column. Oh the cruelty! Okay, maybe I write a few more words.
You don't have to make anything out of it. You don't have to make a rhyming love song and sneak it into a 15-minute medley so that she won't be surprised by the time you've had so much build-up. You don't need candles, you don't need chocolates, roses, cakes, balloons, whips, handcuffs, or whatever the fuck people use nowadays to make special events for their significant others.
Heck, you don't even need the guitar.
GLHF
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On February 05 2013 00:18 Eskiya23 wrote:Show nested quote +On February 04 2013 22:09 SunsetSC2 wrote:Here's the thing, mate. You can play the slow-dance of awkward social interaction with they-who-hold-your-heart-in-a-vice-like-grip. You can. We've all danced that motherfucking dance. It can go for awhile. A long-ass time. Anywhere from weeks to months to years. Trust me on the years thing.Twirling, twirling into fizzled-out nothingness because you were both too pussy to do anything ever always. You can replay the E-major moment over and over again, making connections between it and shit swimming around in your head - which you're clearly doing with this passionate Spanish-esque subtext, you transparent window you - until it becomes like a Taylor Swift song you can't budge from your brain meats if your life depended on it. But let me tell you something, random person on TL. Let me tell you what women appreciate. Honesty.I'm not telling you to go full alpha. I'm not telling you to bash her over the head with your figurative club and drag her to your nerd cave. But you gotta be straight about it, man. Just make a move already. Women don't drink peach tea and eat passion fruit with just anyone, while emphatically stating they want to try new things. Like, what the hell, dude? You need a neon sign over her head saying 'TAKE ME NOW'? Life's too short. You're young and intelligent and like video games - that makes you at least a moderately decent human being. Quit daydreaming about her fingers on your guitar (NAA'SAYIN?!) and take a risk. That's what makes life grand - the risks. If she's into it, great. If not, you've grown as a person, you're better for the experience, you can listen to 30 Seconds To Mars because THEY GET YOU and you can validate eating ice-cream for a few days. BOTH SOUND GREAT, RIGHT?! + Show Spoiler +For the record, though, y'all will never get married if you have deep, differing political beliefs. Sorry. I break hearts. But you can still kiss her and whatever. I encourage it. Get amongst it. Don't even afraid. I believe in you. #YOLOSWAG2013 Do you ever lay down the whiskey ?! Great post 10/10, your post is a nice big titanium bat to the unsuspecting cranium. To the brohan in question, stop pettyfooting (is that a word?) around the issue. You like her, at least make your advances more clear.
It's 'pussyfooting' just so you know
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Just want to indicate a few things. OpticalShot post is great in that respect but I want to emphasize a few things that are quite important.
The girl gave you enough signals for you to know that she is definitely interested in you giving you. Now, it is your job to make things more intimate if you are actually interested in her.
Step 1: break the touch barrier if you haven't done it. Touch her a lot but not in a sleazy way, just like you would be touching your niece if you were hanging out with her. She needs to get accustomed to your touch. The longer you wait the more awkward it will feel later. And start with really innocent touches.
Step 2: Bring it to a more personal level. Show that you are interested in her personality. OpticalShot covered it well. This will make her even more comfortable with you/
Step 3. Once you make her feel comfortable with your touch (Step 1) and you guys get connected on personal level (Step 2) you need to make the "big move". Actually, if everything goes right, this won't be a big move but rather it will come naturally. The priority here is not to screw things up by suddenly chickening out in the last moment. Once you feel it's the time to kiss, her kiss her. Don't let the opportunity slip away.
I have screwed up at stage 3 a couple of times but have learned the lesson. Once the girl gets touchy with you and you hug in an intimate way, go for the kiss. The thing is that even if she rejects you. unless she moves away and she gets angry. do not apologize or anything. Maybe it was slightly too early. But by doing this you indicated: (1) that you are interested in her and (2) that you are brave enough to take the charge of things. From my own experience and from exchanging stories with my friends we all came to the conclusion that once the girl is interested then a failed kiss attempt does not deteriorates you chances at all. I have discussed it with my female friends as well and they also said so.
Good luck!
PS. And you have a perfect situation there. You are teaching her things which means that you have the higher social value. The girl likes you and she is willing to come to your place... You cannot ask for better situation.
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My friend's relationship with his wife started the same way. A guitar lesson. Five years later they are married and happily so.
Good luck to you.
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Next lesson should be easy, man. Just put the guitar in her lap and make sure that you touch her crotch a lot with your hands, as if it was by mistake, no matter how obvious it is that it's done on purpose. If she rejects you, it just wasn't meant to be so it's time to move on. How can you have a relationship with a girl who doesn't let you touch her crotch?
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On February 04 2013 22:09 SunsetSC2 wrote: Trust me on the years thing.
I'm confused. I've only known you for a couple of months...
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