EPTFormatting is hilariously bad right now, but every day it will get better as my friend has time to help me. Also, i'm being published on Cracked.com and listverse.com, just trying to practice my writing, give some interesting information and make some money for blog giveaways.
Anyone that thinks this blog is mean-spirited, doesn't understand me. It's my fault though.
I don't think I am special. I don't think I am an amazing writer. I don't think I am better than anyone. I just want to make people laugh and deliver a message. I realize I have 3 twitter followers, lol. I realize I am not changing anything. But just like all of you young whippersnappers with aspirations, I will bust my ass and try.
Thank you for all the support, if the world was more like teamliquid, I wouldn't be writing this blog.
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1/29/2013
I'm told that I had been stewing in my mom's lower intestine for about nine months before she finally went to the hospital, chugged some mineral oil and squeezed me out of her ass like ketchup. When my little infant feet hit terra firma for the first time, I looked around and saw who my parents were and made a mad dash for the door. I actually saw the rays of sunlight shining through the emergency exit I was headed for when the umbilical cord stopped me and pulled me back like an elastic leash. I tried wrapping the cord around my neck as a last futile attempt at ending what was sure to come, but they wrapped me in a fluffy pink straightjacket and put a beanie on my head. I can't imagine what it must've felt like for Rita, my dad's fourth wife, as she came into the world. Her jobless mom on the dole in New Orleans had a new kid every nine and a half months. Rita was number seven of fourteen, and if being the middle child of three leaves kids psychologically slighted, imagine the effects of 14. She grew up obese; eating turkey necks and chitlins and constantly fighting with 13 other siblings for the single nipple of attention that her mom could provide. Almost every child had a different father, and none of them were in the picture. She was pretty normal most of the time. Her dysfunction came about when she got angry. She had a terrible temper and hated the idea of being inferior to anyone else in any way. She was never wrong and never backed down from an argument. She eventually married my dad.
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Read the rest at: www.caseofthemondaysblog.com
Most recent listverse list: http://listverse.com/2013/01/29/10-weird-parlour-games-played-before-tv-existed/
Twitter: www.twitter.com/stephenwestsc
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