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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
Mexico2170 Posts
^lol
I hadn't posted but I read what you all said. I agree that I shouldn't have sent those messages. And frankly I think I should listen to you guys more. After all I was asking for advice.. What's the point in asking if you won't end up listening to it..
And time proved you right. I didn't send her any message since Friday, and 2 mins ago she just sent me a "...have a good night.." Message. I wish I had listened before this blew up :/ I guess that it's true that if she didn't feel the attention she would...react.
So what now? I should tell her to meet and talk in person and see where the conversation goes, right?
BTW lemon have you ever thought about writing a book? I'd buy it haha.
(I also greatly appreciate the advice all of you guys have given me, I just point the one of lemon cause he was the first to tell me that I should give her the time and I didn't listen)
About the tinder stuff, if my advice is worth something, just try to not talk much and ask her to meet.
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On April 12 2016 10:51 BluemoonSC wrote:
random tinder newbie question. if a chick matches with you, you exchange a message or two, but then she doesn't respond yet doesn't unmatch you..when (if ever) is it acceptable to send another message?
never
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On April 12 2016 14:38 [Phantom] wrote:
^lol
I hadn't posted but I read what you all said. I agree that I shouldn't have sent those messages. And frankly I think I should listen to you guys more. After all I was asking for advice.. What's the point in asking if you won't end up listening to it..
And time proved you right. I didn't send her any message since Friday, and 2 mins ago she just sent me a "...have a good night.." Message. I wish I had listened before this blew up :/ I guess that it's true that if she didn't feel the attention she would...react.
So what now? I should tell her to meet and talk in person and see where the conversation goes, right?
BTW lemon have you ever thought about writing a book? I'd buy it haha.
(I also greatly appreciate the advice all of you guys have given me, I just point the one of lemon cause he was the first to tell me that I should give her the time and I didn't listen)
About the tinder stuff, if my advice is worth something, just try to not talk much and ask her to meet.
You would've loved Sixstrings.
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You would've loved Sixstrings.
Can't even remember what he used to say or what he got banned for. But I want him back!
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On April 12 2016 14:01 Acrofales wrote:
Girl: Hi, I'm BritneySpears14. How are you?
Adept of IgnE: Hi BritneySpears14, I'm Bloodninja. Nice to meet you. I'm great. Wearing my robe and wizard hat. Want to know about my plans for tonight?
Girl: sure! Sounds interesting. What are you up to?
Adept of IgnE: I cast Lvl 3 Eroticism.
Girl: Kinky. What does that do?
Adept of IgnE: You turn into a really beautiful girl.
Girl: ....
Adept of IgnE: So that was my 3-7 messages. Want to meet up for coffee?
Girl; no.
The end.
You know that would probably work
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Have less and less contact with women,but I am getting better at Starcraft... So,that is nice
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On April 13 2016 00:37 ThorPool wrote:
Have less and less contact with women,but I am getting better at Starcraft... So,that is nice
Just start talking to more girls to fix that!
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On April 13 2016 02:55 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2016 00:37 ThorPool wrote:
Have less and less contact with women,but I am getting better at Starcraft... So,that is nice Just start talking to more girls to fix that!
I find sentences like that to be very... far away from reality.
For example, I'm 34, I live in a town where I know exactly one person. I do know my co-workers, but, while they are nice and all, I prefer not to spend my private time with them and they are busy with their own families, kids, houses and such anyways.
That means my whole social life consists of the occasional shopping tour or breakfast with that one friend. She has a tiny social circle as well, all of them married couples, so the only event I go to is her birthday party once a year. That means my opportunities to actually meet women are limited to:
1. Random women on the street.
2. Random women at the grocery store.
3. Random women at where ever else I decide to do something.
Since I don't talk to random women for no reason as I have no desire to be *that* creepy old guy, there aren't actually any women that I could talk to.
Just talking to more women is easy - when you are young and surrounded by friends and opportunities that bring you in contact with girls.
It's a bit harder when you live in a town where you essentially don't know anyone.
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On April 13 2016 03:06 Morfildur wrote:
It's a bit harder when you live in a town where you essentially don't know anyone.
This sounds like an entirely separate problem that you might want to work on. Make some friends! Find some activities that you like doing and find likeminded people. Join a club. Go to a bar. Talk to random strangers who look like they're doing something interesting. Being so alone is, in general, not a healthy long term perspective.
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On April 12 2016 13:07 IgnE wrote:
It doesn't matter how you come off to a random nobody. Even if you are a male model only 40% of women will be swiping right on you.
But if she hasn't responded to you yet she doesn't have interest.
she responded once and actually I waited a day on another chick and she messaged me again too. so I think ill wait it out.
I just happened to find the only girl on tinder that has an interest in anime AND is quite goodlooking ANDDDDD is a teacher too.
not exactly dime a dozen.
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On April 13 2016 03:06 Morfildur wrote:
I find sentences like that to be very... far away from reality.
For example, I'm 34, I live in a town where I know exactly one person. I do know my co-workers, but, while they are nice and all, I prefer not to spend my private time with them and they are busy with their own families, kids, houses and such anyways.
That means my whole social life consists of the occasional shopping tour or breakfast with that one friend. She has a tiny social circle as well, all of them married couples, so the only event I go to is her birthday party once a year. That means my opportunities to actually meet women are limited to:
1. Random women on the street.
2. Random women at the grocery store.
3. Random women at where ever else I decide to do something.
Since I don't talk to random women for no reason as I have no desire to be *that* creepy old guy, there aren't actually any women that I could talk to.
Just talking to more women is easy - when you are young and surrounded by friends and opportunities that bring you in contact with girls.
It's a bit harder when you live in a town where you essentially don't know anyone.
I never said it was going to be easy even though it what I said sounds like it. But talking to women is literally the only way you will be talking to more women.
However I'm assuming most people do not live in a small town where everyone would find out if you started trying to pick up girls at the grocery store.
It also sounds like you don't really put yourself in position where you could possibly meet new people. Pick up a new hobby. Go on get-togethers with the families, maybe there will be some smoking hot single cougar there 
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On April 13 2016 03:06 Morfildur wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2016 02:55 bloodwhore~ wrote:On April 13 2016 00:37 ThorPool wrote:
Have less and less contact with women,but I am getting better at Starcraft... So,that is nice Just start talking to more girls to fix that! I find sentences like that to be very... far away from reality. For example, I'm 34, I live in a town where I know exactly one person. I do know my co-workers, but, while they are nice and all, I prefer not to spend my private time with them and they are busy with their own families, kids, houses and such anyways. That means my whole social life consists of the occasional shopping tour or breakfast with that one friend. She has a tiny social circle as well, all of them married couples, so the only event I go to is her birthday party once a year. That means my opportunities to actually meet women are limited to: 1. Random women on the street. 2. Random women at the grocery store. 3. Random women at where ever else I decide to do something. Since I don't talk to random women for no reason as I have no desire to be *that* creepy old guy, there aren't actually any women that I could talk to. Just talking to more women is easy - when you are young and surrounded by friends and opportunities that bring you in contact with girls. It's a bit harder when you live in a town where you essentially don't know anyone.
Dude you essentially DON'T KNOW ANYONE. Not approaching women you find attractive seems very irrational.
And as the guys said - talk to people, not just women. It's okay to be scared, which is what you are - the old thing is just your brain trying to protect your ego with an excuse.
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Seriously, guys, I was giving an example of a situation where someone doesn't have frequent contact with women to meet, since some people forget that not everyone lives in an american college dorm during spring break. I didn't ask for life advice. I live that life since now 7 years, sometimes living in cities where I didn't even have that one friend, and so I've gotten used to it. Sure, I would be happier with a woman by my side, but I am me, I love programming, I love video games, I hate most people, I hate most things that other people like, and I won't change who I am for any reason, so I'm not looking for a bigger social life and finding a girlfriend has a fairly low priority for me.
I am content with what I have, because - apart from the lack of a woman at my side - it's what I want.
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On April 13 2016 05:11 Morfildur wrote:
Seriously, guys, I was giving an example of a situation where someone doesn't have frequent contact with women to meet, since some people forget that not everyone lives in an american college dorm during spring break. I didn't ask for life advice. I live that life since now 7 years, sometimes living in cities where I didn't even have that one friend, and so I've gotten used to it. Sure, I would be happier with a woman by my side, but I am me, I love programming, I love video games, I hate most people, I hate most things that other people like, and I won't change who I am for any reason, so I'm not looking for a bigger social life and finding a girlfriend has a fairly low priority for me.
I am content with what I have, because - apart from the lack of a woman at my side - it's what I want.
Well you should expect advice like this when you post what you posted in a thread like this.
We're not trying to be mean, I'm not at least, can't speak for Lem0n, he might have some devilish intentions
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I should also add, even though I'm in university. Women doesn't just fly up in my face trying to mate with me or even talk to me. I have to actively initiate contact with 99% of the women I want to have some sort of chance with.
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On April 13 2016 05:22 bloodwhore~ wrote:
I should also add, even though I'm in university. Women doesn't just fly up in my face trying to mate with me or even talk to me. I have to actively initiate contact with 99% of the women I want to have some sort of chance with.
Personally I found meeting girls at university to be completely different to meeting girls outside of university Sure, uou generally still have to make a move either way but keep in mind:
1. Any courses with elective subjects generally have high rotation so that you meet new people each semester. So if you take four units per semester you're meeting eight new batches of people per semester. After university unless you're consulting you most likely spend over a year with one batch of people - and the number of people is probably smaller than a university class (so you're meeting roughly less than 1/8th the people).
2. Similar to the above there are far fewer repercussions on failed pick-ups or relationships or even attempted friend-making. I'm not one to care either way but I can understand that having a fling go sour with a girl you can avoid easily is slightly different to when you're working and likely forced to be in their proximity.
3. Girls at university tend to be more receptive to meeting new people. It's considered to be part of the university experience so they are more likely to respond if you just walk up and say hello. I'm not saying girls afterwards are completely cold but I think there is a different mentality and expectation.
4. As far as relationships (and sex) I also think the expectation varies quite significantly between university and a decade later. So girls are probably far more willing to experiment (or give things a go) whilst they're younger/university-aged.
Just food for thought. I would consider myself moderately sociable but I can tell you that the number of new people I've met in the last four years was far, far less than the four years I spent at university.
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On April 13 2016 05:11 Morfildur wrote:
Seriously, guys, I was giving an example of a situation where someone doesn't have frequent contact with women to meet, since some people forget that not everyone lives in an american college dorm during spring break. I didn't ask for life advice. I live that life since now 7 years, sometimes living in cities where I didn't even have that one friend, and so I've gotten used to it. Sure, I would be happier with a woman by my side, but I am me, I love programming, I love video games, I hate most people, I hate most things that other people like, and I won't change who I am for any reason, so I'm not looking for a bigger social life and finding a girlfriend has a fairly low priority for me.
I am content with what I have, because - apart from the lack of a woman at my side - it's what I want.
Well yeah, each to his own. If friends, love and affection is not something that'd make your life better why pursue it. It kinda sounded like you saying like it's hard and you wanted those things but we read it wrong I guess - not sure why mention the town etc. as it has little to do with it.
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On April 13 2016 05:11 Morfildur wrote:
Seriously, guys, I was giving an example of a situation where someone doesn't have frequent contact with women to meet, since some people forget that not everyone lives in an american college dorm during spring break. I didn't ask for life advice. I live that life since now 7 years, sometimes living in cities where I didn't even have that one friend, and so I've gotten used to it. Sure, I would be happier with a woman by my side, but I am me, I love programming, I love video games, I hate most people, I hate most things that other people like, and I won't change who I am for any reason, so I'm not looking for a bigger social life and finding a girlfriend has a fairly low priority for me.
I am content with what I have, because - apart from the lack of a woman at my side - it's what I want.
If you don't meet girls in real life, and are uninterested in extending your social circle to include more people (in general), then use an online service.
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On April 13 2016 03:06 Morfildur wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2016 02:55 bloodwhore~ wrote:On April 13 2016 00:37 ThorPool wrote:
Have less and less contact with women,but I am getting better at Starcraft... So,that is nice Just start talking to more girls to fix that! I find sentences like that to be very... far away from reality. For example, I'm 34, I live in a town where I know exactly one person. I do know my co-workers, but, while they are nice and all, I prefer not to spend my private time with them and they are busy with their own families, kids, houses and such anyways. That means my whole social life consists of the occasional shopping tour or breakfast with that one friend. She has a tiny social circle as well, all of them married couples, so the only event I go to is her birthday party once a year. That means my opportunities to actually meet women are limited to: 1. Random women on the street. 2. Random women at the grocery store. 3. Random women at where ever else I decide to do something. Since I don't talk to random women for no reason as I have no desire to be *that* creepy old guy, there aren't actually any women that I could talk to. Just talking to more women is easy - when you are young and surrounded by friends and opportunities that bring you in contact with girls. It's a bit harder when you live in a town where you essentially don't know anyone.
Join a Crossfit Gym. Works better than online dating and you get fit :D
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On April 13 2016 10:52 GoTuNk! wrote:
Join a Crossfit Gym. Works better than online dating and you get fit :D
Only downsides are the obnoxious crossfitters 
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EPT
