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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On November 13 2015 06:36 bloodwhore~ wrote: Hehe thanks! If you think I'm friendly now then you should have seen me pre-"getting ripped on runescape by someone who claimed to be able to trim my rune armor". Lost all faith in humanity that day.
relevant:
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On November 13 2015 06:34 ticklishmusic wrote: I'll try and explain how the situation is: Well I feel like I can't give you any good advice on most of that. However I wouldn't want to waste time on her if she was hesitant about meeting up either.
relevant: Yes!
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On November 13 2015 06:14 farvacola wrote: Don't let the virgin fool you; there are plenty of women out there who are very much looking for a guy to see through their game and cut to the chase. You can't speak "literally" because you don't actually know you're talking about lol. Besides, though we like to pretend otherwise, the fact that this is an international board is nowhere more apparent than when Europeans with very different hookup cultures give Americans advice as to how to interact with women.
THERE ARE NO HARD AND FAST RULES IN DATING. The EU/US Scene seems to be the same pretty much with similar stuff working. I've used the same off-date approach pretty much on girls from US, China, Russia, Ukraine, Czech Republic, Scotland, Serbia and there aren't huge differences.
On November 13 2015 06:14 farvacola wrote: Don't let the virgin fool you; there are plenty of women out there who are very much looking for a guy to see through their game and cut to the chase. You can't speak "literally" because you don't actually know you're talking about lol. Besides, though we like to pretend otherwise, the fact that this is an international board is nowhere more apparent than when Europeans with very different hookup cultures give Americans advice as to how to interact with women.
THERE ARE NO HARD AND FAST RULES IN DATING.
What bloodwhore said is exactly that - state exactly what you want, go about your business. This does seem to be one hard and fast rule that works with girl that are attracted to you. And building attraction over texts is super hard anyways
On November 13 2015 05:57 ticklishmusic wrote: Alright guys, this is getting slightly ridiculous.
Same girl. Still chatting pretty regularly, convo seems perfectly fine, maybe even slightly flirty at times. I ask her on a date, she basically says yes. Finalizing the exact time and she goes radio silent. Literally all of my what? Like, did she fall asleep or something? I get last weekend she couldn't make it, but this is kinda confusing.
I've been told that it's an awful idea to try bumping or pressing her for an answer, but at this point I'm kind of whatever. Either I go with the slightly joking approach about "y u no respond" or with the "look, we met under certain presumptions. you know, i know. i think you're pretty cool and pretty, etc, etc. let's figure out if this is going somewhere and if so where (hookup, friends, dating), otherwise nice chatting bye have a good life". You became a pen pal at this point it seems, sorry chief. Next time chat only after you express exactly what you want and get it.
You can totally still express that, just wait a few days, or when she replies to you with whatever - just do it in a nice sweet way like:
"Hey pretty girl, I think you're really cool so I'd love to take you out on that date! So tell me which day you are free, and I'll tell you where and when we'll meet!"
The let's figure out if this is going somewhere otherwise nice chatting bye have a good life". - way better option is to actually act on it, instead of saying it! If she doesn't respond or is wishy washy and what you want is a date then just stop all contact, and have a good life! And from now on only give her your attention if she agrees on a date with you.
and if so where (hookup, friends, dating edit: OR NOTHING AT ALL - that will happen a lot and that's good!)
This is what going on dates (in person) at first is no? So don't see the point of spelling it out. It's like saying "now I am inserting my penis into your vagina" "Now we are having sexual intercourse"
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Forget about that girl ticklish. Games aside, if a girl has no reason to be reluctant meeting you (if you are her friend's ex for example) the dodginess is just a sign of disinterest..
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On November 14 2015 00:36 ticklishmusic wrote: l0l got a date With her? When, where?
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yes
tonight
sushi and a movie
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On November 14 2015 04:42 ticklishmusic wrote: yes
tonight
sushi and a movie Good luck!
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Will it make me happier to love her? She said she loves me, but i'm too afraid that i will be sad afterward if i trust her complete, i try to play strong guy; but actually i am not. Does faking it works?
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Just got back from date and I think it went really well. I was surprisingly not nervous (I thought I would be) at all and kept on the funny side of the awkward-funny spectrum. Chatted about all sorts of stuff for about 3 hours until the restaurant told us they were closing, then chatted for a bit in the parking lot. Wasn't like a sweep-her-off-her-feet thing (not my style anyways), but I think date #2 is definitely in the cards. To be objective: execution wasn't perfect, but definitely pretty good, maybe like 7-8/10.
GUYS I DONT THINK I FUCKED UP
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On November 14 2015 07:05 HUMMAN wrote: Will it make me happier to love her? She said she loves me, but i'm too afraid that i will be sad afterward if i trust her complete, i try to play strong guy; but actually i am not. Does faking it works? Love her. Be strong for her, and you'll find the strength to keep up the act. Eventually it won't be an act anymore. "Fake it till you make it" is a true sentiment.
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On November 13 2015 08:29 LemOn wrote: The EU/US Scene seems to be the same pretty much with similar stuff working. I've used the same off-date approach pretty much on girls from US, China, Russia, Ukraine, Czech Republic, Scotland, Serbia and there aren't huge differences.
Hmm. While I think there are definitely things that tend to work I also think that you're probably afforded more tolerance if you're foreign to a particular culture.
As an example I could use an approach that is considered forward in China but because I'm viewed as an Australian in China it might be seen as fine. It might even be considered a refreshing change when in reality a Chinese local doing the exact same thing might be perceived differently.
Not saying this is the entire reason but I do think this justification happens a lot.
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Well I have only experience with 1st gen chinese girls living abroad
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I have only dated one girl. Had a relationship for 3 years with her. Now, I'm single. =/
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one time i dated a girl. Her name was siri :p
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Second date with the girl from the club is on wednesday by the way. We're going climbing. I will have a good spot to look at her butt. And I can show off a bit
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On November 14 2015 23:41 bloodwhore~ wrote:Second date with the girl from the club is on wednesday by the way. We're going climbing. I will have a good spot to look at her butt.  And I can show off a bit  Next you need to go bowling, so you can see how she handles balls.
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On November 15 2015 04:49 Impervious wrote: Next you need to go bowling, so you can see how she handles balls. Haha. Would be kinda hilarious to suggest it like that. However, I seem to fuck my thumb when I go bowling. I pinched a nerve before and lost all sense of touch in half of my thumb for a few months. Was not a good feel.
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On November 14 2015 13:11 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: Love her. Be strong for her, and you'll find the strength to keep up the act. Eventually it won't be an act anymore. "Fake it till you make it" is a true sentiment.
Thanks for advice. Yesterday was a big day for me, i think i kinda understand the man figure in my head, loving and caring is not a weak behaviour(before i was thinking like that); instead it is a strong action since you dont get dependent to anyone. This shows your character is brave enough to play big in life and fight with the threats.
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On November 14 2015 07:05 HUMMAN wrote: Will it make me happier to love her? She said she loves me, but i'm too afraid that i will be sad afterward if i trust her complete, i try to play strong guy; but actually i am not. Does faking it works? I don't really think "faking it" is possible. We're not talking about being confident here, it's love. Having said that, you should give her a chance.
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