|
We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On January 15 2014 17:14 MightyBill wrote:On cheating girls I do have a funny story. About 7 years ago I was banging a girl on a regular basis for like 2 months. So we were enjoying ourselves when suddenly she got a phone call which she answered, after which she said "you got to leave now, my boyfriend is coming over in 10 minutes". So my reaction was more along the lives of "what the fuck you have a boyfriend?". Anyway she went to have a quick shower after she shoved me out of her room (in a big student house). I couldn't really think straight for my next plan of action, because about 5 minutes before I was happily exercising my carnal lusts, so I went to the toilet to call a buddy for advise, like should I wait for the guy and tell him? Or just walk away? His advice was pretty golden: "don't be a white Knight, you'll just get punched. Just steal something that is hers, she'll never dare to call you again anyway!" So I took her toasti maker from the kitchen. And believe me, the tosti's still taste good  haahah nice one
|
On January 15 2014 17:53 Mikau wrote:Show nested quote +On January 15 2014 13:13 chadissilent wrote:On January 15 2014 04:54 SixStrings wrote: I've been with my first girlfriend for five years. We met when we were fifteen and moved in together when we were seventeen.
Now, six years later, she is married. I visited her this weekend, because we kept 'in touch' for most of the time and her husband was working. I made her call him when while she was going down on me, not too obvious of course, but enough so that it really drove me crazy.
So the next noon, he comes back, early of course, because apparently life is a cheap romance novel, and attacks me. One would assume he would be furious at his wife...
Anyway, I still sometimes consider her 'mine', and I had a fair bit to drink, so when he attacks me, physically I might add, I don't run away but try and fight, he kicks my ass, his wife cries, and I puke on his feet from a punch in the gut...
Here's to exes... If you did that to me/my wife, you wouldn't have enough healthy fingers to be typing right now. While agree that he's a total scumbag, I'd say the wife is at least as guilty here, if not more. He didn't do this 'to the wife', the wife and him did something awful to the husband. If I come home and some guy is fucking my wife, the first thing that happens is he gets the shit beat out of him. I can always deal with her later, and that is probably grounds for an at-fault divorce so she can get the fuck out of my house and take nothing.
|
What if (and this is a hypotethical case, because it doesn't apply here) the guy didn't know the woman was married? I never really understood this urge to beat up the other guy in this scenario. The problem is with the wife betraying the husband's trust, not the person she decides to do it with.
Now I understand that if you come home to somebody fucking your wife you are unlikely to behave logically and calmly, but still.
That's not to say I don't think the other guy is a total scumbag though, assuming he knows ofcourse.
|
Netherlands6175 Posts
Assuming he didn't know at the time of meeting and that she wasn't wearing her wedding ring, going back to her house should be a dead giveaway. Especially the bedroom. Couple photographs, two towels in the bathroom, two wardrobes in the bedroom, men's clothing etc lying about etc. It is possible she has a male housemate, but unlikely, especially if she is past uni age.
|
On January 15 2014 17:14 MightyBill wrote:On cheating girls I do have a funny story. About 7 years ago I was banging a girl on a regular basis for like 2 months. So we were enjoying ourselves when suddenly she got a phone call which she answered, after which she said "you got to leave now, my boyfriend is coming over in 10 minutes". So my reaction was more along the lives of "what the fuck you have a boyfriend?". Anyway she went to have a quick shower after she shoved me out of her room (in a big student house). I couldn't really think straight for my next plan of action, because about 5 minutes before I was happily exercising my carnal lusts, so I went to the toilet to call a buddy for advise, like should I wait for the guy and tell him? Or just walk away? His advice was pretty golden: "don't be a white Knight, you'll just get punched. Just steal something that is hers, she'll never dare to call you again anyway!" So I took her toasti maker from the kitchen. And believe me, the tosti's still taste good 
Speaking of inadvertently assisting someone whose cheating
Was dating this girl for about 6 months while in college, we broke up towards the end of the year, (she wanted to take the relationship further, but I wasn't ready for it) but kept having sex once in a while.+ Show Spoiler + I couldn't stop myself, she had no gag reflex.. After that school year ends, I don't hear from her for about a month, then one day that summer she calls saying she'll be in my area and wants to come see me. I'm like sure, why not.
We have lunch and then have sex, and she's like I have to get going. I casually ask what she's up to for the rest of the day and she says she's going to go meet her boyfriend's parents and have dinner with them. Needless to say that was the last time I hung out with her.
|
On January 16 2014 01:27 dravernor wrote: Assuming he didn't know at the time of meeting and that she wasn't wearing her wedding ring, going back to her house should be a dead giveaway. Especially the bedroom. Couple photographs, two towels in the bathroom, two wardrobes in the bedroom, men's clothing etc lying about etc. It is possible she has a male housemate, but unlikely, especially if she is past uni age.
If you're looking for it, you'll probably see the evidence. But she could have cleaned up before hand and it's not like you're going through the wardrobes to see if there's men's clothes there. Not everyone keeps photographs and two towels doesn't really mean anything (could keep one up for guests).
|
Netherlands6175 Posts
A person that goes out of their way to preplan something like this is someone you don't want to know. I would understand marginally more if it spontaneously happened after a drunk night out etc. MARGINALLY. But someone who cleans up and hides things in preparation, removes their wedding ring and goes out to pick up someone... I really hope I never meet someone like that. I can't imagine it going that far tbh, I don't think that even passed out level of drunk I would go home with someone I just met. But yeah, that is just me. Ugh.
|
It doesn't have to be hidden, they could just keep a clean house and not have clothes all over the place. Not to mention there is no requirement to go back to her place anyway (or were we assuming that for this scenario?).
|
On January 15 2014 17:14 MightyBill wrote:On cheating girls I do have a funny story. About 7 years ago I was banging a girl on a regular basis for like 2 months. So we were enjoying ourselves when suddenly she got a phone call which she answered, after which she said "you got to leave now, my boyfriend is coming over in 10 minutes". So my reaction was more along the lives of "what the fuck you have a boyfriend?". Anyway she went to have a quick shower after she shoved me out of her room (in a big student house). I couldn't really think straight for my next plan of action, because about 5 minutes before I was happily exercising my carnal lusts, so I went to the toilet to call a buddy for advise, like should I wait for the guy and tell him? Or just walk away? His advice was pretty golden: "don't be a white Knight, you'll just get punched. Just steal something that is hers, she'll never dare to call you again anyway!" So I took her toasti maker from the kitchen. And believe me, the tosti's still taste good  this is just splendid
|
On January 15 2014 13:22 Zambrah wrote:Show nested quote +On January 15 2014 10:26 Ghostcom wrote:On a brighter note: I'm going on a date tomorrow with a beautiful girl, former figure skater and now doing her masters at a business school. Should be interesting  I like this notion of a brighter note. Good luck on your date! Hope it goes well, make sure to come back with some details or a story so we can continue the brighter note thing. 
To once again go for the brighter note:
My date went really well. Met at 15:00 (I was actually 5 minutes late - not because I think it fashionably to be so, but because a meeting dragged on. Luckily she was very understanding and I had texted her ahead of time to inform of the delay), we hung out for 3 hours without the conversation being awkward or labored at any point. Not really any physical contact during the time, but I figured she would've upped and left earlier if she wasn't interested. Told her that I had enjoyed myself tremendously and hoped to see her again, placed my hand on her waist, and pulled her in for the kiss - which she reciprocated 
She is currently in the middle of her exam period, so we decided to call it for the evening, biked towards home together (we both live in the same part of town) and now I'm sitting here, still able to taste her on my lips and with her scent in my nose - all in all quite happy Now to refrain from building up unrealistic expectations.
|
Did you get a fear boner?
|
I have never heard of such a thing before. And no, I talk to people for a living and have a very healthy (probably slightly too big) ego
|
|
On January 15 2014 17:53 Mikau wrote:Show nested quote +On January 15 2014 13:13 chadissilent wrote:On January 15 2014 04:54 SixStrings wrote: I've been with my first girlfriend for five years. We met when we were fifteen and moved in together when we were seventeen.
Now, six years later, she is married. I visited her this weekend, because we kept 'in touch' for most of the time and her husband was working. I made her call him when while she was going down on me, not too obvious of course, but enough so that it really drove me crazy.
So the next noon, he comes back, early of course, because apparently life is a cheap romance novel, and attacks me. One would assume he would be furious at his wife...
Anyway, I still sometimes consider her 'mine', and I had a fair bit to drink, so when he attacks me, physically I might add, I don't run away but try and fight, he kicks my ass, his wife cries, and I puke on his feet from a punch in the gut...
Here's to exes... If you did that to me/my wife, you wouldn't have enough healthy fingers to be typing right now. While agree that he's a total scumbag, I'd say the wife is at least as guilty here, if not more. He didn't do this 'to the wife', the wife and him did something awful to the husband.
I kinda feel that society doesn't blame the wife and has this whole "beat up the guy" attitude mainly because the rather patriarchal attitudes promoted by the media and so on. Like from what you see on TV etc, men are supposed to be manly and assertive (and so are expected to get mad), while women are usually devoid of agency (and so no one blames them, because they are just things that men cheat with).
|
On January 15 2014 17:14 MightyBill wrote:On cheating girls I do have a funny story. About 7 years ago I was banging a girl on a regular basis for like 2 months. So we were enjoying ourselves when suddenly she got a phone call which she answered, after which she said "you got to leave now, my boyfriend is coming over in 10 minutes". So my reaction was more along the lives of "what the fuck you have a boyfriend?". Anyway she went to have a quick shower after she shoved me out of her room (in a big student house). I couldn't really think straight for my next plan of action, because about 5 minutes before I was happily exercising my carnal lusts, so I went to the toilet to call a buddy for advise, like should I wait for the guy and tell him? Or just walk away? His advice was pretty golden: "don't be a white Knight, you'll just get punched. Just steal something that is hers, she'll never dare to call you again anyway!" So I took her toasti maker from the kitchen. And believe me, the tosti's still taste good 
Oh my god so funny. Gold nugget here.
|
Oh, the wife in SixStrings' escapade is equally guilty here. Shame on both of them.
|
On January 16 2014 04:14 levelping wrote:Show nested quote +On January 15 2014 17:53 Mikau wrote:On January 15 2014 13:13 chadissilent wrote:On January 15 2014 04:54 SixStrings wrote: I've been with my first girlfriend for five years. We met when we were fifteen and moved in together when we were seventeen.
Now, six years later, she is married. I visited her this weekend, because we kept 'in touch' for most of the time and her husband was working. I made her call him when while she was going down on me, not too obvious of course, but enough so that it really drove me crazy.
So the next noon, he comes back, early of course, because apparently life is a cheap romance novel, and attacks me. One would assume he would be furious at his wife...
Anyway, I still sometimes consider her 'mine', and I had a fair bit to drink, so when he attacks me, physically I might add, I don't run away but try and fight, he kicks my ass, his wife cries, and I puke on his feet from a punch in the gut...
Here's to exes... If you did that to me/my wife, you wouldn't have enough healthy fingers to be typing right now. While agree that he's a total scumbag, I'd say the wife is at least as guilty here, if not more. He didn't do this 'to the wife', the wife and him did something awful to the husband. I kinda feel that society doesn't blame the wife and has this whole "beat up the guy" attitude mainly because the rather patriarchal attitudes promoted by the media and so on. Like from what you see on TV etc, men are supposed to be manly and assertive (and so are expected to get mad), while women are usually devoid of agency (and so no one blames them, because they are just things that men cheat with).
Yeah you should beat the wife up first and the scumbag up second if he doesn't flee.
|
On January 16 2014 17:43 IgnE wrote:Show nested quote +On January 16 2014 04:14 levelping wrote:On January 15 2014 17:53 Mikau wrote:On January 15 2014 13:13 chadissilent wrote:On January 15 2014 04:54 SixStrings wrote: I've been with my first girlfriend for five years. We met when we were fifteen and moved in together when we were seventeen.
Now, six years later, she is married. I visited her this weekend, because we kept 'in touch' for most of the time and her husband was working. I made her call him when while she was going down on me, not too obvious of course, but enough so that it really drove me crazy.
So the next noon, he comes back, early of course, because apparently life is a cheap romance novel, and attacks me. One would assume he would be furious at his wife...
Anyway, I still sometimes consider her 'mine', and I had a fair bit to drink, so when he attacks me, physically I might add, I don't run away but try and fight, he kicks my ass, his wife cries, and I puke on his feet from a punch in the gut...
Here's to exes... If you did that to me/my wife, you wouldn't have enough healthy fingers to be typing right now. While agree that he's a total scumbag, I'd say the wife is at least as guilty here, if not more. He didn't do this 'to the wife', the wife and him did something awful to the husband. I kinda feel that society doesn't blame the wife and has this whole "beat up the guy" attitude mainly because the rather patriarchal attitudes promoted by the media and so on. Like from what you see on TV etc, men are supposed to be manly and assertive (and so are expected to get mad), while women are usually devoid of agency (and so no one blames them, because they are just things that men cheat with). Yeah you should beat the wife up first and the scumbag up second if he doesn't flee.
Because nothing solves marital issues like a little assault here and there, right?
Granted, the husband sounds like a bonehead for beating up a random dude, but that doesn't make what sixstrings did any better if he knew about the situation (her being married). I mean come on, you're just asking for trouble at that point.
|
So is it weird to talk to and want to date a girl not because she's physically attractive or your type but because you find her "intriguing" for a lack of a better term? Idk what it is honestly.
|
On January 16 2014 17:43 IgnE wrote:Show nested quote +On January 16 2014 04:14 levelping wrote:On January 15 2014 17:53 Mikau wrote:On January 15 2014 13:13 chadissilent wrote:On January 15 2014 04:54 SixStrings wrote: I've been with my first girlfriend for five years. We met when we were fifteen and moved in together when we were seventeen.
Now, six years later, she is married. I visited her this weekend, because we kept 'in touch' for most of the time and her husband was working. I made her call him when while she was going down on me, not too obvious of course, but enough so that it really drove me crazy.
So the next noon, he comes back, early of course, because apparently life is a cheap romance novel, and attacks me. One would assume he would be furious at his wife...
Anyway, I still sometimes consider her 'mine', and I had a fair bit to drink, so when he attacks me, physically I might add, I don't run away but try and fight, he kicks my ass, his wife cries, and I puke on his feet from a punch in the gut...
Here's to exes... If you did that to me/my wife, you wouldn't have enough healthy fingers to be typing right now. While agree that he's a total scumbag, I'd say the wife is at least as guilty here, if not more. He didn't do this 'to the wife', the wife and him did something awful to the husband. I kinda feel that society doesn't blame the wife and has this whole "beat up the guy" attitude mainly because the rather patriarchal attitudes promoted by the media and so on. Like from what you see on TV etc, men are supposed to be manly and assertive (and so are expected to get mad), while women are usually devoid of agency (and so no one blames them, because they are just things that men cheat with). Yeah you should beat the wife up first and the scumbag up second if he doesn't flee. Or maybe beating up people isn't the right way to solve your problems? Violence is hardly ever the right answer to problems (though it is often very satisfying).
|
|
|
|