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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On March 08 2013 05:05 Magrath wrote:Show nested quote +On March 08 2013 04:41 phipsL wrote:
So i already posted here but i thought i might do an update. Well, it isnt an update since nothing has changed so im still thinking my destiny doesnt want me to get a date Don't listen to those using "she isn't comfortable enough with you to be alone with you" as an excuse for not going out with you on a 1-on-1 date. You're in public. How alone can you be? She only said yes because she couldn't think of an excuse to say no that wouldn't hurt your feelings. Girls are like that. Move on to the next girl.
hey just want to comment in, what do i do if the girl tells me that she is not comfortable being in a 1-to-1 conversation or interaction ever cause it completely flustered me because that is actually who she is .....
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On March 22 2013 06:58 Ubiquitousdichotomy wrote:
Today I asked out this girl in my Group Communications class to dinner over sprink break and she said "I dont know mabye later ill let you know"
Can anybody interpret if that is a yes or no or mabye or is it just a nice way of saying fuck off? Im so confused -_-;
its a no
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On March 22 2013 09:09 Erasme wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 06:58 Ubiquitousdichotomy wrote:
Today I asked out this girl in my Group Communications class to dinner over sprink break and she said "I dont know mabye later ill let you know"
Can anybody interpret if that is a yes or no or mabye or is it just a nice way of saying fuck off? Im so confused -_-; its a no
From my experience pretty much anything that isn't an obvious "yes" is a "no". I cannot even begin to count how many creative "no" answers I've heard.
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It's very easy. If you ask a girl something like "wanna have dinner saturday night" and she answers something like this:
--->no
--->busy
--->maybe
You can safely assume its a girl no.
Acceptable answers:
-->yes
-->Im busy saturday but how about .....
Kinda in a nutshell. There are always exceptions ofcourse
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Blazinghand
United States25553 Posts
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it"
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lol'd when i thought about the title :/
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On March 22 2013 09:17 B.I.G. wrote:
It's very easy. If you ask a girl something like "wanna have dinner saturday night" and she answers something like this:
--->no
--->busy
--->maybe
You can safely assume its a girl no.
Acceptable answers:
-->yes
-->Im busy saturday but how about .....
Kinda in a nutshell. There are always exceptions ofcourse
So true. Girl's try to pretend like they are "hard to understand" or whatever, but they're not lol They're fairly simple actually. If she's interested, you'll know for sure
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If a girl truly likes you or is interested she will make it obvious and take any chance she can to spend time with you. If she says she is uncertain or needs to think about it then it means she doesn't like you but doesn't want to be rude and straight up say no.
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I love the post a couple of pages ago with the song Kiss the Girl for the disney movie Ariel the mermaid. This song is really relevant to this thread. Cheers guys !
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On March 22 2013 09:37 ffadicted wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 09:17 B.I.G. wrote:
It's very easy. If you ask a girl something like "wanna have dinner saturday night" and she answers something like this:
--->no
--->busy
--->maybe
You can safely assume its a girl no.
Acceptable answers:
-->yes
-->Im busy saturday but how about .....
Kinda in a nutshell. There are always exceptions ofcourse So true. Girl's try to pretend like they are "hard to understand" or whatever, but they're not lol They're fairly simple actually. If she's interested, you'll know for sure
Sometimes I really do believe girls are playing "hard to understand" for the sake of being "hard to understand". No other reason.
I'm asking you to have dinner with me, just the two of us. Not a life-time commitment. =__=
Anyway, some girls really do have plans/really busy on the day you ask for. But if they try to make room for you on another date, either she is really friendly or you have AT LEAST a chance.
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On March 22 2013 09:28 Blazinghand wrote:
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it"
Yeah, same here. The most confusing was a girl who said yes, then said no later, but nothing too crazy. It's either been outright rejection or success.
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I know she meant "No" when she responded, "You don't really like me kus I'm blah blah blah" (obviously didn't say blah blah blah, but I don't feel what she really said was all that important or true even) then a few moments later said "Idk maybe, you can call me"
But, dammit I wanna keep trying ^.^
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This quarter of college, I was so extremely bogged down by work and other obligations, that there was even a 6-week period where I couldn't even go out, not even for dinners. Terrible, terrible quarter. Only a couple girls this quarter, but whatever. I kind of got tired of that sort of thing considering my crazy shenanigans during the summer and fall, anyways.
I'm currently mainly trying to pick things back up with a girl of interest for very serious dating. Very intelligent lady, and I think I've met my match in wits, which to be honest is extremely astonishing. We like a lot of the same sorts of things, but that's just the tip of the iceberg.
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On March 22 2013 10:38 docvoc wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 09:28 Blazinghand wrote:
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it" Yeah, same here. The most confusing was a girl who said yes, then said no later, but nothing too crazy. It's either been outright rejection or success.
Ikr? Ask her to my place to have drinks and party. She says awesome, yes, etc, she can't wait for the weekend to come. Day before she turns me down saying that she works in the morning and doesn't want to go in hung-over. I'm like cool we can do it another time then. She recommends the next night on Saturday instead, we originally planned for Friday. Then on Saturday as I give her my address she blows me off again saying she's gonna hang with her gfs instead.
I mean wtf, don't tell me yes and act like your looking forward to it all week and make me clean my apt to spotless condition and make sure I'm stocked with things you like to drink if you're gonna fucking blow me off twice in a row with barely any notice.
Would rather you just tell me to fuck off then to waste my time on you.
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On March 22 2013 11:50 Zooper31 wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 10:38 docvoc wrote:On March 22 2013 09:28 Blazinghand wrote:
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it" Yeah, same here. The most confusing was a girl who said yes, then said no later, but nothing too crazy. It's either been outright rejection or success. Ikr? Ask her to my place to have drinks and party. She says awesome, yes, etc, she can't wait for the weekend to come. Day before she turns me down saying that she works in the morning and doesn't want to go in hung-over. I'm like cool we can do it another time then. She recommends the next night on Saturday instead, we originally planned for Friday. Then on Saturday as I give her my address she blows me off again saying she's gonna hang with her gfs instead. I mean wtf, don't tell me yes and act like your looking forward to it all week and make me clean my apt to spotless condition and make sure I'm stocked with things you like to drink if you're gonna fucking blow me off twice in a row with barely any notice. Would rather you just tell me to fuck off then to waste my time on you.
Well... at least you have a cleaned up apt now.
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On March 22 2013 11:50 Zooper31 wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 10:38 docvoc wrote:On March 22 2013 09:28 Blazinghand wrote:
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it" Yeah, same here. The most confusing was a girl who said yes, then said no later, but nothing too crazy. It's either been outright rejection or success. Ikr? Ask her to my place to have drinks and party. She says awesome, yes, etc, she can't wait for the weekend to come. Day before she turns me down saying that she works in the morning and doesn't want to go in hung-over. I'm like cool we can do it another time then. She recommends the next night on Saturday instead, we originally planned for Friday. Then on Saturday as I give her my address she blows me off again saying she's gonna hang with her gfs instead. I mean wtf, don't tell me yes and act like your looking forward to it all week and make me clean my apt to spotless condition and make sure I'm stocked with things you like to drink if you're gonna fucking blow me off twice in a row with barely any notice. Would rather you just tell me to fuck off then to waste my time on you.
One of the girls I'm talking to now always tries to bail when we hang out. 3 times we have hung out, 3 times she has tried to bail 3 times I kept persistant, and pursued her a bit, and she ended up coming out all three times. Now we are on the verge of a relationship, Alot of the times, the lady likes to see that she is not just another chick, she wants you to chase her a bit.
I wouldn't freak out on a flake, either drop it, or realize that some people need extra encouragement to go out.
It's like if your friend invites you to a party, and you have that initial gut wrench of not wanting to go. Hell you might even get dragged to the party, but you have an amazing time once your there. That kinda feeling is what the chicks are having.
Going in hungover to work is a somewhat good excuse, but you two can still have a beer or two without getting shitfaced.
I think your being too hard on yourself and the girl. She prolly did want to hang out with you, and prolly would have, she just had fears about the consequences. As a man you have to let her know that the consequences are nothing to be afraid of.
Extreme case example. I wanted to go barhopping with this chick, she had a cold sore and was embarassed about it, so she was making some excuses. I told her if anybody stared at her cold sore I would get butt ass naked and that I would be there to pick her up at 930. When I got there she had covered it up with makeup.
Like I said before some girls like to be chased.
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On March 22 2013 14:54 Jisall wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2013 11:50 Zooper31 wrote:On March 22 2013 10:38 docvoc wrote:On March 22 2013 09:28 Blazinghand wrote:
I don't think I've ever been in a situation where it was like "yeah I asked this girl out and she was trying to say yes and wasn't clear about it" Yeah, same here. The most confusing was a girl who said yes, then said no later, but nothing too crazy. It's either been outright rejection or success. Ikr? Ask her to my place to have drinks and party. She says awesome, yes, etc, she can't wait for the weekend to come. Day before she turns me down saying that she works in the morning and doesn't want to go in hung-over. I'm like cool we can do it another time then. She recommends the next night on Saturday instead, we originally planned for Friday. Then on Saturday as I give her my address she blows me off again saying she's gonna hang with her gfs instead. I mean wtf, don't tell me yes and act like your looking forward to it all week and make me clean my apt to spotless condition and make sure I'm stocked with things you like to drink if you're gonna fucking blow me off twice in a row with barely any notice. Would rather you just tell me to fuck off then to waste my time on you. One of the girls I'm talking to now always tries to bail when we hang out. 3 times we have hung out, 3 times she has tried to bail 3 times I kept persistant, and pursued her a bit, and she ended up coming out all three times. Now we are on the verge of a relationship, Alot of the times, the lady likes to see that she is not just another chick, she wants you to chase her a bit. I wouldn't freak out on a flake, either drop it, or realize that some people need extra encouragement to go out. It's like if your friend invites you to a party, and you have that initial gut wrench of not wanting to go. Hell you might even get dragged to the party, but you have an amazing time once your there. That kinda feeling is what the chicks are having. Going in hungover to work is a somewhat good excuse, but you two can still have a beer or two without getting shitfaced. I think your being too hard on yourself and the girl. She prolly did want to hang out with you, and prolly would have, she just had fears about the consequences. As a man you have to let her know that the consequences are nothing to be afraid of. Extreme case example. I wanted to go barhopping with this chick, she had a cold sore and was embarassed about it, so she was making some excuses. I told her if anybody stared at her cold sore I would get butt ass naked and that I would be there to pick her up at 930. When I got there she had covered it up with makeup. Like I said before some girls like to be chased.
Oh I definitely tried to pursade her otherwise and make it as easy as possible for her. She wasn't budging. I've pretty much given up on her though. I'll prob try once more, 3rd times the charm right? If not, she's not worth the time and I'll move on to the next.
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I have a question. Is it possible to get a gf without trying to find one? I mean if you live your life without even thinking about gettin one.
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On March 22 2013 15:19 Wildmoon wrote:
I have a question. Is it possible to get a gf without trying to find one? I mean if you live your life without even thinking about gettin one.
NO
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On March 22 2013 15:19 Wildmoon wrote:
I have a question. Is it possible to get a gf without trying to find one? I mean if you live your life without even thinking about gettin one.
Yes. I have never really "chased" a girl. They seem to fall into my lap. I'm told that I'm charismatic and hot but I personally don't think that I am too different than the average guy. I find that I just act normal, barely seem to flirt (I don't even think I know how to flirt) and I end up with girlfriends. I think I am in a minority though.
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EPT
