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yeah i agree, murderotica's tone isnt meant to antagonize its merely to make his point clearer, i really don't mind at all. however, its unfair to judge a person without knowing their background, if he hasn't come out to anyone , his friends family, for this long there was probably a good reason. - unsupporting parents - he did before and got shut down/ harassed Not saying i condone his suicide(personally i think its pathetic) but it's unfair to be presumptuous to say "he committed suicide over that" when you aren't gay and don't know anything about his life experience
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On October 01 2010 08:05 HeavOnEarth wrote: yeah i agree, murderotica's tone isnt meant to antagonize its merely to make his point clearer, i really don't mind at all. however, its unfair to judge a person without knowing their background, if he hasn't come out to anyone , his friends family, for this long there was probably a good reason. - unsupporting parents - he did before and got shut down/ harassed Not saying i condone his suicide(personally i think its pathetic) but it's unfair to be presumptuous to say "he committed suicide over that" when you aren't gay and don't know anything about his life experience As I said before I don't think people realise just how much harrasment follows these kinds of things, from personal experience I can only say that the shitstorm from a photo (in a shower) got to much for a girl to move. It's not just that you get exposed and that it is humiliating at the moment. It doesn't end, you'll be associated/harrased for a long long time.
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On October 01 2010 06:08 Caller wrote: Rather than talk about privacy, I think we need a serious discussion on how fucking stupid suicide is.
Every religion and even just plain old evolutionary thought discusses suicide as being a waste of everything. Suicide is probably the ultimate selfish thing to do. When people try and OD on pills and whatnot, all they are doing is wasting medical resources that other people may need, just because they can't deal with a period of angst. Sure, it might be really hard on you, but how is it just that you can waste people's time and energy, and threaten the lives of others (by depleting medical resources) just because of your own self-pity and angst? Especially teenagers. They fail to see how people struggle to survive in places and they take that gift of not having to worry about surviving the next day and just throwing it away. They fail to understand what parents have spent a HUGE portion of their lives doing. This guy must have had super parents backing him up to become such an accomplished violinist. Just because his roommate streamed video of him making out with a guy he throws all that away? Ungrateful is what it is.
Homophobia (thought it is a huge problem, and I am as guilty as the next person) isn't the issue here. It could have been some other kind of stimulus and this kid likely would've still thrown it away. I know people who have committed suicide just because they couldn't get tenure. I know people who have nearly thrown their lives away for some of the most stupid reasons. I know kids who have thought about suicide just because they were being bullied at school. So was I! I was being bullied a LOT in middle school, but I took it like a man and changed so that was no longer the case.
There was a J-drama I watched that best sums up how hypocritical suicide is. A person is shown a video of their open heart surgery, especially how their heart is beating. The doctor remarks how ironic it is that while she is trying to throw her life away, that little heart is like a baby struggling to stay alive. And the thought that if you killed yourself you would be taking this baby down with you too-that perhaps is the feeling we need to convey to stupid angsty people.
Suicide shouldn't be deified or used as support for a cause like we see here. Suicide isn't something to turn people into martyrs. It should be ridiculed, laughed at, and just made to be the cowardly, selfish act that it is, so that the only people that end up doing it are the cowardly selfish people that we would be better off without.
This post is completely ridiculous,
First of all the person in question did not commit suicide by pills, and even if he did he would in no way be threatening other people's lives by doing it, since there is no shortage of pills where he is from, from what I know. It's like saying when I buy a pack of pills and I never use them, I'm threatening peoples lives.
Secondly, in order for life to have meaning, we humans attach importance to things. For example, some people think family is very important, so they find fulfillment and joy from it, and likewise sadness and depression in the event of death of family members etc.. Other people think their career is important, some people think tenure is important, and others feel that the way in which the world perceives them is important. So like you can feel extreme joy and happiness when everything is going the way you want it to, you can feel extreme sadness and depression when all that you value turns to shit. When that happens, some people decide that the quantity and depth of negative emotions they are experiencing is unbearable so they decide to end their life, for all that they thought was really important, and what made life worth living is no longer there.
And now you, and others like you come along (narrow-minded judgmental pricks), who do not share the views of the person who committed suicide, and do not place the same importance to the things over which the person killed himself, and they say: "He's an idiot, he's not worth my time if he kills himself over such trivial things".
Who the fuck are you to tell anyone what they should think is or is not important? And who the fuck are you to tell anyone what is or is not worth living or dying for?
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On October 01 2010 07:53 travis wrote:I think murderotica is in the right to say whatever the fuck it is that he thinks and if people take that as hostility it's kind of their problem. because i wanted someone who opposed this view to respond to it, ill post it again Show nested quote + I don't think there are any problems that lie specifically in being selfish. It seems to me that in life that our primary obligation is to tend to our selves and to do what we want.
(this is in response to the whole "suicide is selfish" argument. My reply is "yes, but so what?") It's not our responsibility to protect others from indirect harm, that doesn't seem reasonable at all.
ironically this can also be used to defend blunt communication methods
But to what extent is being selfish alright? I am of the view that humans are naturally selfish (psychological egoism, no such thing as a selfless deed, blah blah etc). I think it is pretty foolish to think it would be easy for that student to ignore all the criticism, all the judging eyes, all the shame, whether it is worth being shamed over or not... Such unbelievable pain, I can see someone getting to the point where they consider the pain unbearable, and there appears to be no way out. I have not experienced what he has, but I have entertained extreme thoughts, such as suicide.
The problem I have with selfishness is when it is irrefutably intruding on another's life, on another's choices. Sure, you might be biologically programmed to be selfish, to some extent, but acting so selfish, at the expense of someone else... you'd either have to be a complete moron, or a complete ass.
Was the suicide selfish in a way? I'd say yes, but the amount of pain he would have endured, the trauma, likely years of therapy, just to get a semblance of a normal life... to live with this memory, this shame... that would take far more willpower than I think many are capable of.
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On October 01 2010 05:58 dybydx wrote: sometimes its i feel great knowing hell exists for ppl that really need it.
lol, sorry to break it to you but there's no hell, dude
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On October 01 2010 07:13 Murderotica wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2010 07:06 viraltouch wrote:the example doesn't parallel with this case like you said, but it was to make a point that you don't need to physically push someone off the bridge to be responsible for his death. also its not only breach of privacy if you go on your twitter mocking them of their sexual activities and broacasting it live for everyone to see. If he cared about privacy so much he would have closed the window, or gone to a hotel, or covered up his homosexuality at least. I am sorry, but any normal person would think asking your roommate to stay away from a night is a precaution for privacy. when two people are in a room, you normally expect that its just between two of them, not +webcam and rest of the world. It was not the rest of the world. It was the room mate and his friends, which would have happened anyway, since he made it so obvious he was having a gay relationship. Word of mouth. He was not cautious enough, given that the stakes were so high. Also, about forums: http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=320377Go read for yourself. man I should have paid attention to the site name when I clicked on that ugh
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On October 01 2010 08:12 Lurker87 wrote: The problem I have with selfishness is when it is irrefutably intruding on another's life, on another's choices. Sure, you might be biologically programmed to be selfish, to some extent, but acting so selfish, at the expense of someone else... you'd either have to be a complete moron, or a complete ass.
yes, i agree completely
but this isn't a problem that's inherent to selfishness, it is a problem in poor decisionmaking
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So I understand what the guy did, recorded, twitted, etc.
What did the girl do exactly?
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Vatican City State2594 Posts
On October 01 2010 08:05 Blackou wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2010 07:19 Murderotica wrote: 1. I am agnostic, I believe in science, and therefore the decay of our bodies. That is why I say we only have 1 life to live. I feel that makes it more valuable to me than perhaps even religion can make it seem, with the divine judgment ahead and all that. Personal opinion of course.
A little bit out of subject but ... As a man of Science, can you really explain your reasoning to go from 1)I believe in science, and therefore the decay of our bodies to 2)" that is why i say we only have 1 life to live " to 3) " i feel that makes it more valuable" What is really your reasons to go from point 2 to point 3 exactly? (I am agnostic too, totally agree with 1 and 2, just don t see any scientific reasoning in your last transition...opinions are great but ... ) Or asked another way, how do you define the "value of life " you are talking about? ( Don t take it bad,i am just curious really) Because we only have 1 life and no afterlife, be it hell heaven or reincarnation, this existence is our only conscience. I would do anything to continue being conscious of myself, my friends, my family, my surroundings. I would never take that away from myself, choosing to be nothing, absolutely nothing, than to be living. To be alive and conscious is such a unique thing that to throw it away is a disgrace. Christians can look forward to the afterlife - we have nothing to look forward to. Therefore this life is the most important thing we have.
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On October 01 2010 08:14 travis wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2010 08:12 Lurker87 wrote: The problem I have with selfishness is when it is irrefutably intruding on another's life, on another's choices. Sure, you might be biologically programmed to be selfish, to some extent, but acting so selfish, at the expense of someone else... you'd either have to be a complete moron, or a complete ass. yes, i agree completely but this isn't a problem that's inherent to selfishness, it is a problem in poor decisionmaking
Selfishness, in and of itself, is not a problem, in my opinion. It furthers the propagation of our species (ignoring the subject of intelligence of specific species, and their display of selfishness). If we were not selfish at heart, there would not be a drive to further technology, knowledge... really anything that we naturally think as advancement. Again, I'd say the only "problem" with selfishness is when it is wielded by a... particularly lacking individual. We all make bad decisions, but such a decision was entirely self-centered, and had easily foreseeable damage. I guess it just depends on who is utilizing this "gift". I apologize if I am not addressing what you are wanting, but I really don't disagree with selfishness. I hope you find your opposing view.
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On October 01 2010 08:24 .risingdragoon wrote: So I understand what the guy did.
What did the girl do exactly?
I'm also interested in knowing what the girl did exactly. The news articles I've read haven't specified anything about what she did, besides that it was in her room.
I just graduated from Rutgers last year and I know people who know her (one who is really close with her), but obviously they are biased (just like the news articles I've read are biased one direction).
Just curious if anyone saw a news article that specifies what the girl did.
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That's just wrong. Gay or not, privacy rights should be respected and not violated for kicks and giggles.
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Vatican City State2594 Posts
On October 01 2010 08:34 bontez wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2010 08:24 .risingdragoon wrote: So I understand what the guy did.
What did the girl do exactly? I'm also interested in knowing what the girl did exactly. The news articles I've read haven't specified anything about what she did, besides that it was in her room. I just graduated from Rutgers last year and I know people who know her (one who is really close with her), but obviously they are biased (just like the news articles I've read are biased one direction). Just curious if anyone saw a news article that specifies what the girl did. She let him use her room. That is all. What I said was that she probably would have let him use her room even if there was no webcam plot, because they are good highschool friends.
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He was already in her room when he found out about the gay sex, that was his twit. But she's also charged?
And both their names are released to the media. That's not responsible journalism. Now there's no way for either of them to stay at Rutger even if they get a suspended sentence.
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I went to school at Rutgers with the kid. He was a music major like me. We played in orchestra together this year. It's horrible how people are still mocking him, even in death. give him a break...
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Vatican City State2594 Posts
On October 01 2010 08:40 .risingdragoon wrote: He was already in her room when he found out about the gay sex, that was his twit. But she's also charged?
And both their names are released to the media. That's not responsible journalism. Now there's no way for either of them to stay at Rutger even if they get a flap on the wrist. Yup. People are already protesting in person in front of the dorm where they live, and there is a "Black Friday" memorial walk on the street next to it. I would be surprised if they could get into any non-community college at this point, and they most certainly can't stay at Rutgers, if not due to administration's decisions, then due to the chance of harassment/violence in their direction. Like I said before, Rutgers is a very progressive school, and the gay community here is very strong. I fear for their safety tbh.
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I'm glad the roommate is being brought up on criminal charges.
I'm also glad they released the name of the roommate. He deserves whatever he gets.
Has anything been said from the guy this dude was actually with in the video tape? I'd love to hear his view on this, though it's obvious what his point of view would be.
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On October 01 2010 08:46 Murderotica wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2010 08:40 .risingdragoon wrote: He was already in her room when he found out about the gay sex, that was his twit. But she's also charged?
And both their names are released to the media. That's not responsible journalism. Now there's no way for either of them to stay at Rutger even if they get a flap on the wrist. Yup. People are already protesting in person in front of the dorm where they live, and there is a "Black Friday" memorial walk on the street next to it. I would be surprised if they could get into any non-community college at this point, and they most certainly can't stay at Rutgers, if not due to administration's decisions, then due to the chance of harassment/violence in their direction. Like I said before, Rutgers is a very progressive school, and the gay community here is very strong. I fear for their safety tbh.
I think that's a bit over-reacting, no?
The suicide must've blindsided everybody, including the guy he had sex with.
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I can't imagine who raised and who educated those kids. You'd think that by the time you get into college you'd view the world as an intelligent human being.
But then i read all the comments about suicide and there's no thought there either, just repeating what ev'ryone say.
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On October 01 2010 05:42 FabledIntegral wrote: Something I always think about when stories like these come around; how would this be any different if it was a celebrity? Are they supposed to tolerate things like this because they are celebrities? What about sex tapes released? What about poor Emma Watson who had a crotch shot (edit: guys, this was like over a year ago...) like how many weeks after she turned 18? Has this happened to a gay celebrity yet? I feel like the entire media would go crazy and blow up the issue if a closet gay celebrity had sex transmitted over the web, with no one saying anything wrong was done (well there would be backlash if the celeb committed suicide, but not by the mere act of transmitting the web feed). But since it was a random teen that ended up committing suicide, there's an immense backlash.
Don't get me wrong, I think there should be and what the roommate did (with a friend of his) was unacceptable. They even tried to do it a second time, as it says in the article. I think EVERYONE though should have a right to privacy, including celebrities, and don't get why the media is allowed to eat it up/papparazi shove cameras in their face nonstop. What do you guys think?
I don't think the backlash was really about the violation to a right of privacy but rather more focused upon his suicide for being outed as a gay guy. The very idea that prejudice against gay individuals in our society could lead someone to kill himself for being "outted" is really what angered people. This is why they had the gay sit in afterward, etc...
Well, I agree with OP that there should be some extent of a right of privacy (despite it not really being explicit in the Constitution...but rather magically conjured out of the 9th somehow). But really, the only reason celebrities get focused on by the media is because the general public actually enjoys seeing that shit. It's a problem w/ people caring about celebrities more than a violation of privacy in that respect.
Feel bad for the kid, but nothing to kill yourself over. His life was probably shot at the university, but it's not as if his entire future was dead. Roommate's a dick though; would have at least fucked him up before I killed myself if I were him. Too nice.
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