Flaky girls

On April 06 2009 16:06 SpiritoftheTunA wrote:
yeah i hate flakes

On April 06 2009 16:11 SkY wrote:
Who was playing at the concert?

On April 06 2009 16:12 JWD wrote:


Cut Copy...how can you flake on a Cut Copy concert? They're fucking amazing.

On April 06 2009 16:14 Caller wrote:
The trick is to make the girl do all the preparations

On April 06 2009 16:14 SpiritoftheTunA wrote:

oh shit

kill that bitch

On April 06 2009 16:13 iori_LT wrote:
well i dont wanna sound arrogant or something but that's never happened to me.. and funny thing is i usually do flaking on chicks

On April 06 2009 16:21 Batibot323 wrote:
Hit her with a crowbar.

On April 06 2009 16:22 intrigue wrote:
on the other hand some of my friends just seem destined to be dandruff forever, and although it's still frustrating and annoying it's pretty cute too, like their heads are just full of helium and sometimes end up in space. i don't think that's the case for most people, probably just gross irresponsibility and inconsideration.

On April 06 2009 16:31 Smix wrote:
If a girl is ACTUALLY interested, she won't flake on you.

On April 06 2009 16:22 intrigue wrote:
yeah super agreed, it's just a really really stupid game to play. it's kinda as if i already fucked up before i even hung out with her, or that i'm a pathetic guy with no self-respect to put up with this. you can't even let her know you're upset though because you'll look like an asshole asdoijasf just the way it is, was and always will be i suppose

on the other hand some of my friends just seem destined to be dandruff forever, and although it's still frustrating and annoying it's pretty cute too, like their heads are just full of helium and sometimes end up in space. i don't think that's the case for most people, probably just gross irresponsibility and inconsideration.

cut copy is really cute too i say you ditch this girl

edit: as i've said to many others your troubles in life may be directly correlated to your dirty protoss icon

On April 06 2009 16:32 geometryb wrote:
if you keep asking for something, you'll eventually get a yes.

On April 06 2009 16:10 LosingID8 wrote:
frosted flakes are pretty good though

On April 06 2009 16:32 JWD wrote:


"Hi, look at me, I'm mad desperate here - isn't that super attractive? Yeah!"

On April 06 2009 16:43 Tadzio wrote:
The flakey girls I know will invite me out(!!!)

On April 06 2009 16:36 InfeSteD wrote:
Im going through the exact same shit nowadays WITH EVERY MOTHERFUCKING GIRL I MEET... its pissin me the fuck off and I wanna hit a bitch...

P.S. I flake a lot too tho so I guess its just ppl nowadayz

On April 06 2009 16:24 geometryb wrote:
should invite 2 girls everytime. when one cancels, you can go with the other one. and if both can go then you should just cancel on someone!

it's really stupid for someone to cancel when they bought tickets in advance.

On April 06 2009 16:31 JWD wrote:


FML

Edit: on second thought, this just can't be true. I have had girls lose my interest by flaking on me, and then call/text me multiple times the next week trying to get a second chance at a date. The girl who flaked on me tonight went out with me a couple days ago and said she had a great time - all signs (aside from the flake) point to her being interested.

On April 06 2009 19:05 gzealot wrote:
umm... for some reason, then you would be cutting off a huge potential percentage, from my impressions =/

There isnt anything wrong dating them, just don't marrying them. There was a magazine article on some ladies who slept with 18 to 20 plus guys in various relationships so they cannot ever reveal their dating history once they hit their 20s 30s since no guy would ever want them ever again.

On April 06 2009 16:31 JWD wrote:


FML

Edit: on second thought, this just can't be true. I have had girls lose my interest by flaking on me, and then call/text me multiple times the next week trying to get a second chance at a date. The girl who flaked on me tonight went out with me a couple days ago and said she had a great time - all signs (aside from the flake) point to her being interested.

On April 06 2009 16:22 intrigue wrote:
yeah super agreed, it's just a really really stupid game to play. it's kinda as if i already fucked up before i even hung out with her, or that i'm a pathetic guy with no self-respect to put up with this. you can't even let her know you're upset though because you'll look like an asshole asdoijasf just the way it is, was and always will be i suppose

on the other hand some of my friends just seem destined to be dandruff forever, and although it's still frustrating and annoying it's pretty cute too, like their heads are just full of helium and sometimes end up in space. i don't think that's the case for most people, probably just gross irresponsibility and inconsideration.

cut copy is really cute too i say you ditch this girl

edit: as i've said to many others your troubles in life may be directly correlated to your dirty protoss icon

On April 06 2009 21:58 ishob wrote:
I think a lot of flakes are simply because a lot of girls are really insecure. Sure they'll agree to go on a date with you because they do actually want to, but as you keep getting closer they'll get more and more afraid to spend time alone with you. First time i ask girls out i don't even make it seem like a date, depending on what kind of girl ill ask her out to do anything from rockclimbing to danceclasses.

On April 06 2009 21:58 ishob wrote:
I think a lot of flakes are simply because a lot of girls are really insecure. Sure they'll agree to go on a date with you because they do actually want to, but as you keep getting closer they'll get more and more afraid to spend time alone with you. First time i ask girls out i don't even make it seem like a date, depending on what kind of girl ill ask her out to do anything from rockclimbing to danceclasses.

A lot of girls just need a little time to get to know you better before they can be comfortable spending time with you alone on a real date.

On April 06 2009 22:00 Kennigit wrote:

See this man JWD? Be like him. Solid solid solid

On April 06 2009 22:05 Smix wrote:


If a girl is genuinely interested, she'll go out on a date whether she is insecure or not. If genuinely interested, showing up isn't the biggest thing on their minds - it's how they'll act around the guy once they're on the date, because they if they like the guy, they want the chance of getting to be with him - they'll just be nervous while doing it.

That being said, I stand by my original point that if they're flaking, they don't genuinely like you - they're milking your attention.

On April 06 2009 22:16 inReacH wrote:


This is wrong, a girl who says yes and then backs out is much more likely to have thought you were cool as a first impression so she said yes to whatever you said... and then backed out because a concert is a lot of pressure and girls just don't have to tolerate awkward situations when looking for a boyfriend anymore.

It used to be standard to just accept that you could be on this awkward long ass date and people would just endure it.

Now smart people just go for coffee and make sure they have chemistry before going on a real date... it makes a whole lot of sense.

On April 06 2009 22:21 ishob wrote:
You kinda missed the point, coffee is also something i could ask a girl out to because you're probably in a nice little coffee place with a bunch of other people. The point was that a lot of girls flake because they are scared to go on a 1on1 date with you, and honestly why shouldn't they if you just met. Do something casual first to get her comfortable and then ask her out.

Smix its easy to assume she's toying with you because thats how us males work, we want an answer and usually we want it even before we finished asking the question. Where we are pretty straightforward like that most girls aren't, and you should ask yourself if you really think all girls are just mean, or if maybe the answer isn't that simple.

On April 06 2009 22:23 Smix wrote:


I'm a girl - trust me, if they are flaking that often, they are not interested in something serious.

On April 06 2009 22:23 Smix wrote:


I'm a girl - trust me, if they are flaking that often, they are not interested in something serious.

On April 06 2009 21:16 Smix wrote:


That doesn't mean she's interested, that means she's relishing your attention. If you stop paying attention, of course they'll want it back - but this is VERY different from actually being interested.

On April 06 2009 16:43 Tadzio wrote:
The people that flake on you actually call? The flakey girls I know will invite me out(!!!) then not show up. One of the worst examples I've ever experienced happened last summer. A girl I knew MSN'd me and said "I need a really big favor! I'm moving to a new apartment and need help moving. Can you come over tomorrow at (blahblahtime) and help out. We can hang out afterwords!" I say "sure" and show up at her apartment the next day at the right time. She's not there. I wait 20 minutes just twiddling my thumbs and then leave.

5 hours later she sends me another MSN message, "omg, I totally forgot! Maybe you can come over tomorrow and help?"

My response? "Fuck you." Didn't talk to her again for 5 months.

Now that's flakey.

On April 06 2009 18:06 Person514cs wrote:
Having problem find a protential mate in your local area?

That's not too bad. There are 6.7 billion people out there. If you can afford to travel around the world I am sure you will find some interesting ladies.

On April 06 2009 21:39 Kennigit wrote:
Ok JWD the problem here is not girls. The problem here is you. It's not that your a douche bag, the girls probably are legitimately interested at first but then you are dropping the ball - this is why you are getting dodged. So some questions

- how are you meeting these girls
- how long do you talk/know them for before asking them out
- time between ask out and date?
- Flake:Success Ratio (real one not iccup extraoplation one).

On April 06 2009 23:58 JWD wrote:
I guess my question for Smix (and people who are saying that a flake is a sure sign the girl's just not interested) is, what's my next move after I've been flaked? Like, if the girl proposed the next night instead, should I bite? Or is continuing to pursue the girl futile? I guess I'm just not really sure where to go from here.

On April 06 2009 23:58 JWD wrote:
Usually I meet these girls at class or through other things I do on campus (work out, play soccer, go to some parties). And usually I do not talk to them very much before asking them out - especially now that I'm a senior, I don't really feel like beating around the bush. It's safe to say that most girls that have flaked on me (but not all!) don't know all that much about me before the date.

Time between the ask-out and date is an average of 3 days, and I'd say my flake:success ratio is... 1:4. Yeah wow, that's pretty bad. How depressing. Look, I swear I'm not awful-looking or a sociopath.

I guess my question for Smix (and people who are saying that a flake is a sure sign the girl's just not interested) is, what's my next move after I've been flaked? Like, if the girl proposed the next night instead, should I bite? Or is continuing to pursue the girl futile? I guess I'm just not really sure where to go from here.

On April 07 2009 00:09 thedeadhaji wrote:
ok that on the other hand was prolly one of the worst oneliners ever

On April 06 2009 16:37 HeavOnEarth wrote:
be moar spontaneous
fuck plans

On April 07 2009 01:37 Rekrul wrote:


this.

dont make plans with girls more than 1 day in advance

and if you're so mad at all their flaking, become the flaker

make plans with 2-3 girls a day to ensure meeting atleast one then when u meet one cancel the other two

eat that flaking bitches

On April 07 2009 01:55 ghostWriter wrote:


But if all 2-3 of them flake out on you, then you lose even worse, no?

On April 07 2009 02:48 Chef wrote:
I don't think I was saying you should be a douche bag :O Guy or girl, there's nothing wrong with letting a friend who ditched you know that it's not cool and they ought to make it up to you.

On April 07 2009 03:08 Etherone wrote:


this, don't be an ass and don't flake, actually promise her you won't ever break a promise ( see what i did there) and promise you will show up at every date ( well mainly because you set them up, but that's beside the point)

then after they flake, just meet up with them casually and talk to them tell them in the most heart felt way you can manage how horrible it was and state that they HAVE to make it up to you, everyone always agrees to this ( no idea why) and to make it up to you, ( here is the clincher) they have to set up the date, if she asks : what if i don't, then reply: you OWE ME, they don't flake out on themselves, and now viola power position for you, i suggests you go, but if you are an ass flake, but its gg no re unless you have a legit excuse or mad skizilz

Note: this emotional pressure ( guilt) works with all women, even if there is only a small interest in you, mainly because you give them an excuse to actually be there

.

On April 07 2009 02:45 JWD wrote:
OK, a few things

1) Don't think that I am going over the top spending money on these girls. The concert example was actually a guy flaking, not a girl. And is a dinner date really "fancy"? Just because a place requires a reservation doesn't mean it's $100 per plate. As for a bottle of wine - come on, it's 10 bucks.

2) To everyone whose advice basically boils down to "be a douchebag": no. I'm not a pushover but I'm not an asshole either, and if you think being one is a good long-term dating strategy then you have issues.

Reading this thread got me all up in my head, but I realize I need to ignore most of you guys and just play my game.

There's always someone for someone.

On April 06 2009 17:03 Hypnosis wrote:


dont be afraid to PUNCH A BITCH,, serve one of those fucking succubuses a beat down! if they fucke with you.

On April 07 2009 03:23 Chef wrote:

You live in a fairy tale.

On April 07 2009 03:36 citrus wrote:
@smix - i think you're misrepresenting a lot of girls with some of your statements. you're making a huge distinction between giving/wanting attention and real interest. while this distinction exists for girls who are more mature, emotionally secure, typically older, and looking for commitment, this area is far more grey for most younger girls.

interest is also not a switch that is on or off. it's constantly changing and dependent upon what kind of attention you're receiving from the other person. also, real interest most often develops over time. jwd is looking for dates. real interest is a pretty overwhelming thing for a typical first date kinda thing.

On April 07 2009 03:27 Smix wrote:


No, I don't. I'm not saying that there is "the one" - I'm saying if you're a decent person who can hold a conversation, there WILL be someone for you, if not now then later. And even if things don't go perfectly well with that person, life goes on - you will meet someone else.

On April 07 2009 03:27 Smix wrote:


No, I don't. I'm not saying that there is "the one" - I'm saying if you're a decent person who can hold a conversation, there WILL be someone for you, if not now then later. And even if things don't go perfectly well with that person, life goes on - you will meet someone else.

On April 07 2009 04:35 Chef wrote:

I find that very naive.

On April 07 2009 02:48 Chef wrote:
I don't think I was saying you should be a douche bag :O Guy or girl, there's nothing wrong with letting a friend who ditched you know that it's not cool and they ought to make it up to you.

On April 07 2009 05:05 Rekrul wrote:
dates suck

On April 07 2009 04:43 Rekrul wrote:
hold a conversation

LOL

what does that even mean

On April 07 2009 05:25 ghostWriter wrote:


Didn't you say that you let the girl almost leave the room in a booking or whatever and then you say 저기여 and the girl think "Wow a white guy who speaks my language!" and she comes back and sits down next to you?

On April 07 2009 06:45 Rekrul wrote:


no i grab their arm and yell '어디가 시발년아' and they sit back down then pour my drink then ask me for permission to come back to my place

On April 07 2009 07:35 koreasilver wrote:

A true man.

On April 07 2009 08:22 ghostWriter wrote:


Agreed. Women respond to dominance. The alpha male always wins. ^^
But wait:

"The girl ends up getting frustrated after a minute or two and makes some bullshit excuse then gets up to leave the room and I can just say "Wait a second..." In Korean and the girl will instantly be so interested in the fact that I speak her language and I can tell her to come sit down next to me."

Isn't 잠시만여 and 저기여 basically the same thing?

On April 07 2009 11:42 Rekrul wrote:
thats nothing

u should hear smuft

어디가냐 씨ㅣㅣ팔녀ㅕㅕㅕㅕ나

or (crazy situation where girl wouldnt leave but he wanted her to):

나가있어.

girl: 싫어

빨리 나가냐구

girl: 싫어

나가라 빨리 시발년아

girl: 뭐라구?!?!?!?!

gets up and walks to door and opens it

girl: 문 왜 열었어? 나 안갈거든.

그러게 때문에 아니거든.

*picks up her hand bag and fucking chucks it out the door deep into the night club*

*look of horror and shock on girls face. girl promptly leaves to go try and find her bag. girl does not return*

On April 07 2009 05:05 Rekrul wrote:
dates suck

On April 06 2009 23:18 SpiritoftheTunA wrote:

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

its ok i didn't mean you =/

On April 08 2009 03:01 pyrogenetix wrote:
got flaked twice by the same girl.

and it was both some bullshit she knew about AGES beforehand.

fuck that shit.

built of steam.

On April 09 2009 03:25 Steelflight-Rx wrote:
speaking of girls paying for dinner and stuff.. say ask a girl out for coffee.. are you supposed to pay for her coffee? And what about the first dinner date? I imagine you pay for that as well.. but at what point is //she// supposed to pay her own way? Does it just sort of happen, or do you have to be like "bitch plz, ur turn"

On April 09 2009 04:15 travis wrote:


prolly depends on how bad you wanna get laid

On April 09 2009 03:25 Steelflight-Rx wrote:
speaking of girls paying for dinner and stuff.. say ask a girl out for coffee.. are you supposed to pay for her coffee? And what about the first dinner date? I imagine you pay for that as well.. but at what point is //she// supposed to pay her own way? Does it just sort of happen, or do you have to be like "bitch plz, ur turn"

On April 09 2009 15:56 gzealot wrote:
oh that sounds good. Quick, how did it go?

On April 12 2009 13:15 Jayme wrote:
I found that as soon as I stopped caring girls came flocking.

It's some sort of odd psychology that when you shower them with attention they retreat... but when you ignore the world " OH HE'S MYSTERIOUS SEX ME PLEASE."

Makes me want to swear off girls forever.