EPTWhat would YOU DO? - Page 3
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JimmiC
Canada22817 Posts
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WombaT
Northern Ireland26248 Posts
On November 16 2019 12:27 JimmiC wrote: I think really old and inaccurate pistols, Hamilton style, is the way to go when it comes to duels. Too much RNG. | ||
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Archeon
3262 Posts
You need to stop clinging to the girl. She has no loyalty to you (or anyone else), she is a massive burden to everyone around her and she caused a lot of stress for other people by her inability to either get her shit together or at least being honest. Yes she's bipolar and that makes it very difficult, but that doesn't mean that she has no responsibility for all the shit she does. How many boyfriends/husbands would stay calm if they get cheated repetitively? How many would tell the lover to fuck off and leave it at that? At what point of your clinically insane wife keeping contact with her lover do you start looking for the guy, either to have a serious talk or because you feel ridiculed and horned and angry enough to snap? It's also pretty easy for him to get your address, since all he has to do is ask his wife. Could you stop acting like a dick to this guy and stop provoking him? Btw it's no wonder he has access to her phone when she's proven repetitively to be extremely unreliable and is clinically insane and chronically drunk on top. And she's worse than everything he's suspecting while they planned to get married soon. Also funny how you say that she's honest when she didn't tell you that she had a bf, played it down, made excuses, didn't tell you that she was going to get married, cheated on you and her husband with multiple different guys and sold you to her husband to deflect his anger on you. FFS man, rip those rose tinted glasses from your face, she lied to you, used you and threw you under the bus. She might be apologetic and maybe "this just happened in the spur of the moment", but you don't need to be malevolent or chronically drunk or crazy to choose the easy solution for yourself and the hard one for everyone else. You just need to be extremely irresponsible and self-centered. I agree with Dangermousecat in that regard: Get out now! Stop contacting her, it makes her husband (rightfully) angry, it doesn't help her and it doesn't help you. Stop getting in contact. | ||
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SC-Shield
Bulgaria836 Posts
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oBlade
United States5882 Posts
On November 16 2019 02:29 JimmiC wrote: You really need to cut off connection. I get that is not easy to do. But she is clearly in some way getting something out of the Drama, it is no coincidence that he keeps finding out about you and not others. She must oddly get some, oh he actually cares when he is mad thing out of it. With her substance abuse and other issues she has a lot to fix and there is nothing you can do for her until she does a bunch for herself. That's very true, I remember telling my friend that when we were together. If you're just relaxed and comfortable with her it seems like it's just empty, but getting mad or fighting is like proving you care. Or that's how it felt. Hard to imagine exactly what goes through her head. On November 16 2019 12:23 ninazerg wrote: I would've put the label [Girl Blog] before the title. Also, if another man even looks at your woman, you must challenge him to a duel. Always carry a sword with you so you are always prepared for a duel. I was the other man so this would be inappropriate. Like breaking into someone's house with a coin and saying let's flip for it. Also I did consciously want to elevate my tragedy beyond that particular category because it has a teenage type of sound to it. "Girl" doesn't seem like it should apply after tying the knot. On November 16 2019 09:03 Wombat_NI wrote: Well Bipolar people, if they’re skewing high as opposed to low and depressed will be the most ‘real’ people you’ll meet as a lack of impulse control will have people doing whatever they want to in that particular moment regardless of any long term considerations. Which would somewhat explain the train wreck of her romantic life, it’s not any kind of scheme or plan she is just doing what feels right at any particular moment regardless of the future complexities it is introducing. My condition absolutely requires introspection to manage and fighting emotional pulls with logic or coping structures, if you want to stay stable and have a life similar to that of someone who isn’t suffering from a mental illness. As I said previously with me I might be overcompensating to avoid reckless impulsivity and cutting off things that are ‘real’, but I err on the side of caution. Some people don’t do this out of laziness or ignorance of how to manage things, but others don’t because they actively like living in the moment and being impulsive and free-spirited. I personally prefer to be as stable as I can because at one stage I was extremely unwell and had to take a full year out of normal life via hospitalisation, and I’d rather avoid a return. I think your intentions re the husband are as you say, but in my experience expectation doesn’t match reality. I’ve had many times where if I just have that one more conversation things will be cool and all will be explained and it rarely works out like that. Sorry for the late reply to the post by the way, if you’re curious about the things I outlined briefly feel free to PM me. I don't mean only the highs. I mean that most people seem to wear masks. But with her, the highs or the lows, it was just a refreshingly pure kind of sincerity. Like maybe only crazy people can be themselves. Really start to question a lot after this experience. Maybe love is only for the mentally ill, or it is a mental illness itself. Not being facetious. Stable is good. Other person I knew who said they were bipolar, I would have never even guessed it like I said. It's quite a wide spectrum. But I've tried to be stable in mental terms, not being affected by other people or what they think, or at least pretended to be stable, but realized maybe I'm just a coward. | ||
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