I hope that's got you feeling good, because feelin' good is what it's all about.
But that's not what this blog is about.
I'm not really sure where to start, but here goes nothing:
My best friend is an egomaniac who literally thinks he's the most evolved, smartest person on the planet. He thinks that he can read people with one look, and that he's the most gifted public speaker this world has ever known. Of course, none of this is true, but every time I try to give him a little perspective, I'm an asshole that doesn't know what brotherhood is and I've never cared about him or his feelings once in the 8 years that we've been friends. Let's call him Steve.
So basically, last Thursday Steve got really drunk and told me he wanted to kill himself. Needless to say I was shocked. He said he was scared of his future, and that he just wanted to end it. It took me and both of my suitemates to restrain him long enough to calm down so we could hide all of the sharp things in our dorm and then we were up until three in the morning talking him down from the mental ledge he'd climbed onto. It was the most emotionally taxing night of my entire life.
Until last night.
I need to preface this by saying, I live in the men's athletic dorm, and as you can imagine, the people that live here are inconsiderate fucks. They tip over the trash cans, throw rotten food on the floor, and all other kinds of stupid shit. So we had a hall meeting where the R.A.'s told us that if maintenance had to clean up after us like that one more time, we'd all have to pay a 50 dollar fine. Then, Sunday night, someone set off two smoke bombs in our hallway. The kind with toilet bowl cleaner and aluminum foil or whatever. The first one wasn't so bad, my suitemate mopped it up, and I picked up the fragments of cap and the bottle and threw them away. The second one, however, was worse. The firefighters were called in to de-smoke the hallway, and the police are currently looking into who did it.
So anyways, last night we were having a good time, doing shots and playing vidyagames, until Steve turned to me and said, "Nick, you really have to go tell our R.A. that you touched the bottle so you don't become a suspect". I told him that it doesn't matter, that I had told him already, and whether or not they think I did it, if the police fingerprint the bottle, they'll see I only touched the first one and if they still have any questions for me, what I tell my R.A. isn't going to matter. And he was furious. He said a lot of mean things, ranging from I'm a pussy and that he was going to have sex with every girl I ever tried to date ever, to I'm throwing away my life because I skip class sometimes. He tried to choke me twice, and we just kept telling him to calm down, calm down, calm down. Eventually, I said fuck it, and started packing my shit up, intending to move out as soon as possible. The whole time he was shouting at me, but I just tuned him out. The R.A. came and knocked on the door, and tried to mediate between us, getting us both to agree to at least try to work it out. But as soon as he left, Steve was back on me telling me how I don't care about him or anything. And then he said, "Nick, give me the knife. Where'd you hide the knife".
I didn't know where the knife was, but he found it. He just gave me this look, and before I knew it he ran into the bathroom and slammed the door. I ran as fast as I could to the R.A.'s room, and told him what happened. He got security to call the police, and then went in to our suitemate's room, where they already had gotten the knife away from him. With the crisis averted for the time being, I slumped against the wall, and sat for a while. Eventually, the police arrived and went into my room to do whatever it is they do. Crisis averted, I went outside to bum a bunch of cigarettes from one of my friends and then went to bed.
Number one: He's an attention whore. There are people, a surprisingly large amount, in fact, who are practically the perfect embodiment of the phrase "attention whore". They whore themselves out for attention, screaming for it at the top of their lungs, and throw hissy fits when they don't get it. It is not uncommon for that kind of person to make repeated suicide threats just for the attention he's getting.
Number two: He's in severe depression, and suffering from one of the more sinister symptoms, which is basically your ability to make rational thoughts breaking down. What he would be doing right now would be a "cry for help". You see, depression can actually make you so fucked in the head that, instead of actually asking for, or even consciously wanting help, you use a (moderately) fake suicide attempt as a way to get someone to help fix your sick little head, even if you don't want it to happen.
So here's what's going to happen: you're going to send him to a psychologist/psychiatrist and get him to fix that malfunctioning brain of his. In both scenario one and two, somethings messed up in that lump of nerves between his ears. If he can't afford it, can his parents afford it? Can his insurance afford it? Both scenarios are pretty miserable ways to live, and both can result in suicide (albeit, in one it may be accidental).
Just ship him off to someone who can fix his sick little head, even if he doesn't want to, and you'll both be better off for it.
On October 10 2012 04:44 grush57 wrote: Wait did he run into the bathroom to kill himself?
Yeah, but my suitemates got the knife from him almost immediately they told me.
On October 10 2012 05:23 AnachronisticAnarchy wrote: Ok, there are two possible situations here.
Number one: He's an attention whore. There are people, a surprisingly large amount, in fact, who are practically the perfect embodiment of the phrase "attention whore". They whore themselves out for attention, screaming for it at the top of their lungs, and throw hissy fits when they don't get it. It is not uncommon for that kind of person to make repeated suicide threats just for the attention he's getting.
Number two: He's in severe depression, and suffering from one of the more sinister symptoms, which is basically your ability to make rational thoughts breaking down. What he would be doing right now would be a "cry for help". You see, depression can actually make you so fucked in the head that, instead of actually asking for, or even consciously wanting help, you use a (moderately) fake suicide attempt as a way to get someone to help fix your sick little head, even if you don't want it to happen.
So here's what's going to happen: you're going to send him to a psychologist/psychiatrist and get him to fix that malfunctioning brain of his. In both scenario one and two, somethings messed up in that lump of nerves between his ears. If he can't afford it, can his parents afford it? Can his insurance afford it? Both scenarios are pretty miserable ways to live, and both can result in suicide (albeit, in one it may be accidental).
Just ship him off to someone who can fix his sick little head, even if he doesn't want to, and you'll both be better off for it.
The police took him to the hospital last night, his parents came up this morning. What happens now is out of my hands.
On October 10 2012 05:55 bonifaceviii wrote: Whines like a little bitch and runs into the bathroom to self-harm because he was gonna get caught for smoke-bombing your dorm?
Sounds like a winner to me.
Wrong. I know he didn't do it, and that's not even what he was worried about. He was worried about his name being related to the incident when he "runs for public office some day". Not exactly the most logical train of thought ever, but he wasn't exactly being that logical anyways.
It sounds like this guy is Bi-polar. I hope you keep an eye on him. Bi-Polar people are more likely to engage in wreckless things and actually commit suicide. I hope you know that his pride is just one side of the coin. He is probably actually quite insecure. It's narcisissm yes.
Sounds messy. Keep us updated! try to see it as his weakness rather than him just being a complete douche bag idiot.
On October 10 2012 06:19 meteorskunk wrote: It sounds like this guy is Bi-polar. I hope you keep an eye on him. Bi-Polar people are more likely to engage in wreckless things and actually commit suicide. I hope you know that his pride is just one side of the coin. He is probably actually quite insecure. It's narcisissm yes.
Sounds messy. Keep us updated! try to see it as his weakness rather than him just being a complete douche bag idiot.
Thanks, I appreciate him. I hope whoever his parents take him to are able to help him see value in his existence, because so far I haven't been able to help him at all.
On October 10 2012 06:19 meteorskunk wrote: It sounds like this guy is Bi-polar. I hope you keep an eye on him. Bi-Polar people are more likely to engage in wreckless things and actually commit suicide. I hope you know that his pride is just one side of the coin. He is probably actually quite insecure. It's narcisissm yes.
Sounds messy. Keep us updated! try to see it as his weakness rather than him just being a complete douche bag idiot.
Thanks, I appreciate him. I hope whoever his parents take him to are able to help him see value in his existence, because so far I haven't been able to help him at all.
There is a reason people pay professionals to do that, its a hard, HARD job to do. It's very difficult to help people feel better.
Me trying to read your colleague here from your story would be just as ignorant as him trying to read complete strangers.
But I'll offer this. he does seem to have episodes of mania and depression, which is definitely a bipolar disease symptom.
Professional help is definitely needed, and perhaps some pills would help too, as I have a friend with the same disorder who takes pills regularly and responsibly.
But above everything, YOU, as in you and your friends and whoever's close enough to him, need to talk to him. Sit down in a room, text him on the phone, use email correspondence, or whatever the situation allows, but you need to be there.
He's your friend above all things, and you can't just shut him out because he started acting entirely weird. Give him a chance to repent and think things over with you. If he's in an institute, find some way to check up on him. Ask how he's doing. Talk about his interests. Bring up the subject of the events that happened, when the time seems right.
Basically, you and his other friends need to be his anchor into his regular life. If and when he comes back to senses, and into reality, you need to be there to console and refresh him so that he can live responsibly.
But of course, the last decision is to your call, and to his.
EPT
