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About two weeks ago, I met a new lady-friend. She had a very traditional upbringing and carries high morals with her (no sex until marriage, no smoking, no drinking, etc.). Which is good, I have high morals too (in my opinion)
We have met to have a cup of coffee a few times as acquaintances. What I've noticed on these coffee dates is that she constantly talks about sex.
All the time...
Random comments... "Funny how milk and sperm have a near-identical consistency and color, yet I cannot imagine that they would taste anything alike." After she says a comment like this, she immediately covers her mouth, turns bright purple-red-orange-funny colors from shame, and runs to the bathroom for a minute to collect herself. (Washing her mouth out with soap perhaps?)
I can safely say that she's not a slut or anything, she's just interested... very interested, I suppose...
My conclusion: she's a closet pervert. A virgin too.
My dilemma: How do I show her that sex isn't pure wonderment and amazement and something only to be talked about in hushed whispers? (A little tact please)
  
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Talk to her about it and show her your rationale behind your beliefs and have her explain her rationale behind hers. If shes half-way reasonable and worth anything she'll pick the most reasonable of the two.
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Well her thinking that sperm has the consistency of milk at least proves she hasn't gargled any yet.
You better marry her fast or someone else is popping that cherry pretty soon lol.
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Well perhaps you can lead by example. If you bring up sex in a nonchalant manner, perhaps She'd be more likely to follow suit and realize its not a big giggly deal.
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wtf is high morals? So not having sex before marriage and not drinking makes someone high moral?
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Just let things progress and be patient. She's shy and has a different upbringing. Don't force anything on her. They'll get over it as they get older and meet more and more people.
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She's into you, and curious about finding these things out
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On July 01 2012 08:48 Elegance wrote:
wtf is high morals? So not having sex before marriage and not drinking makes someone high moral?
Pretty sure he said in his opinion.
But then again, maybe he just meant HE thinks HE has higher morals.
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My dilemma: How do I show her that sex isn't pure wonderment and amazement and something only to be talked about in hushed whispers? (A little tact please)
What do you mean sex isn't pure wonderment and amazement? Is my life a lie?
Just bring it up in a normal way. she'll get used to talking about it eventually.
Also, she's into you, she's courious about sex and wants to explore it. She'll do it with you or somebody else eventually, I'd say go for it.
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Lol I think she wants to major in human anatomy/physiology
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On July 01 2012 09:13 Entirety wrote:
Lol I think she wants to major in human anatomy/physiology
So tell her having sex is only helping her with her future and study
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She wants your penis in or around her mouth area
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On July 01 2012 09:29 Zeller wrote:
She wants your penis in or around her mouth area
agreed. This is the first girl blog in a while were the op needs no help your in man dont worry about it.
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>meets girl
>shes high morals (lol wtf?) no sex before marriage.
>she always talks about sex
your in mate.
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How do I show her that sex isn't pure wonderment and amazement
Definitely don't have sex with her.
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Have sex with her. If you don't have sex with her I'll never forgive you. She wants to have sex with you. I will say it once more: She wants to have sex with you.
In conclusion, you should have sex with her.
But wear a condom. That shit's important.
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I just talked to her and told her that she seemed particularly interested in sex. That's when she suddenly broke down in tears and hit me with her life's sob story.
Her mom had AIDS (currently deceased). Her father has AIDS. It was transferred to her at birth, so she has AIDS. Her curiosity for sex was because she won't get to experience it.
Wow, I'm at a total loss for words, I don't even...
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On July 01 2012 13:08 Entirety wrote:
I just talked to her and told her that she seemed particularly interested in sex. That's when she suddenly broke down in tears and hit me with her life's sob story.
Her mom had AIDS (currently deceased). Her father has AIDS. It was transferred to her at birth, so she has AIDS. Her curiosity for sex was because she won't get to experience it.
Wow, I'm at a total loss for words, I don't even...
Holy shit.
*mind blown*
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No hit, just quit. Get far away. Find new lady friend.
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Crazy twist.
Unfortunately you do not want to be involved with a woman like this, as sad as this is. Not sure the best way to proceed forward for you, but it is the correct course.
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Well you weren't lying when you said this is a peculiar problem. This is just bizzare.
Probably best to leave the relationship.
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wow scary world.
thats why you dont just have sex with random person you meet,
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On July 01 2012 13:08 Entirety wrote:
I just talked to her and told her that she seemed particularly interested in sex. That's when she suddenly broke down in tears and hit me with her life's sob story.
Her mom had AIDS (currently deceased). Her father has AIDS. It was transferred to her at birth, so she has AIDS. Her curiosity for sex was because she won't get to experience it.
Wow, I'm at a total loss for words, I don't even...
Oh my god
Completely unexpected result
I guess you know what to do, but be nice to her about it
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sad story, feel bad for her, but how do u know she wont get to experience sex? there are a lot of couples that one has aids and the other doesnt get it
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What, talking about sex isn't some weird thing, just weird for you I suppose. Sounds more like funny comments.
And yeah, these kinds of girls end up being the most fun partners for sex - if they're sane that is.
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I find it sad that people think sex is evil and must be avoided until 'the right time'.
As for her AIDS, can't do much about it. Be nice, don't ostracise her.
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Yeah I'm just going to support her as well as I can.
Holy crap, I never expected something like this. Wow, seriously, meeting someone with AIDS can really change your life.
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On July 01 2012 13:08 Entirety wrote:
I just talked to her and told her that she seemed particularly interested in sex. That's when she suddenly broke down in tears and hit me with her life's sob story.
Her mom had AIDS (currently deceased). Her father has AIDS. It was transferred to her at birth, so she has AIDS. Her curiosity for sex was because she won't get to experience it.
Wow, I'm at a total loss for words, I don't even...
Okay forget what I said. DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HER.
Abort mission. Get the fuck out. Nothing to do here. Eject.
She actually can have sex though. It's possible to have sex with her without the AIDS transmitting to her partner, although I wouldn't risk it unless you're seriously involved with her (as in marriage.)
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This almost doesn't seem real but in case it is you seem highly uneducated about what AIDS/HIV actually is. So you should educate yourself on that first. HIV is a virus infection which can be transmitted through sexual contact. AIDS is a disease in which your immune system is destroyed. You can not contract AIDS through sexual contact. HIV if not controlled will eventually cause AIDS. Today HIV is a chronic condition and while it requires a lot of medication it can be kept under control for a very long time where your viral load can even be below detection levels. If she has AIDS then she most likely does not have long to live as the body simply can not fight off even the simplest bacterial or viral infections. If she has HIV she can live a long and relatively normal life. Sex is possible as long as you're careful and she can even have children through iv fertilization and a cessarian delivery can ensure that the child does not contract HIV. Since it sounds like you're both children I'm going to guess that she will not be your eventual life partner but the least you can do is tell her to not despair.
Again I am highly skeptical of this whole story but whatever; the information here is no less true even if you're just having fun.
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On July 01 2012 14:12 Salv wrote:
Crazy twist.
Unfortunately you do not want to be involved with a woman like this, as sad as this is. Not sure the best way to proceed forward for you, but it is the correct course.
That's not true. Only OP can set the best course for himself.
Anyway, "coffee dates" are pretty low commitment. It doesn't sound like OP is head-over-heels in love or anything, and she'd probably not either. From her perspective, she probably wants to have as normal a dating life as anyone else, save some extra modifications for safety. It can't feel good to have guys run away at the very mention of a permanent condition. If OP would date the girl otherwise then he still should.
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On July 01 2012 13:08 Entirety wrote:
I just talked to her and told her that she seemed particularly interested in sex. That's when she suddenly broke down in tears and hit me with her life's sob story.
Her mom had AIDS (currently deceased). Her father has AIDS. It was transferred to her at birth, so she has AIDS. Her curiosity for sex was because she won't get to experience it.
Wow, I'm at a total loss for words, I don't even...
she's how old?
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AIDS drugs are pretty good these days, combined with condom use you can reduce the chance of transmitting it to the point where you shouldn't worry about it happening at all.
BUT
Still definitely don't have sex with her. What she needs is a lot of emotional support at a very intimate level and unless you want to have a super-duper-serious relationship with her... the craziness that having sex with her will cause is not worth it.
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For fuck sake, man up put a condom and enjoy sex. Don't listen to those sheeps who are telling you not to enjoy yourself. As long as you don't stick your tongue in any holes except the mouth, remember to wash yourselves after sex and put have a good quality condom ALL THE TIME, you should be fine.
TL community, you should be ashamed of propagating lies like this. This kind of alienation really pisses me off.
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otolia its you the shame, you dont get aids if u "stick your tongue" in the holes except if its bleeding as hell, and why are you saying "wash yourselves after sex" does it have anything related to aids? u seem pretty ignorant
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Russian Federation142 Posts
On July 02 2012 05:42 Otolia wrote:
For fuck sake, man up put a condom and enjoy sex. Don't listen to those sheeps who are telling you not to enjoy yourself. As long as you don't stick your tongue in any holes except the mouth, remember to wash yourselves after sex and put have a good quality condom ALL THE TIME, you should be fine.
TL community, you should be ashamed of propagating lies like this. This kind of alienation really pisses me off.
If I could rate comments I'd give you 5/5. Some of these posters are total party poopers. Wear like 2 condoms and you'll be fine.
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I don't know the official stance on having sex with you have HIV but it's entirely possible with a condom. Do some research, find out what's safe and what's not. As a male if you urinate after sex it generally kills off anything that might have entered your body (you can't rely on this but it's known to help). The only way fluid can enter you and infect you during sex (unless you have open wounds) is because when the semen is released it creates negative pressure in the urethra and some fluid is "sucked" up inside you. Male urination contains antiseptic chemicals, which is how it helps after sex to kill off any foreign bodies.
In saying that I'm not a medical professional, just talk to someone who is and find out the real deal.
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Guys, I'm not going to fuck her. Condom or no condom.
I think there's a misunderstanding here... it's not that she feels deprived of sex. She feels deprived of what sex represents - a partner for life (no one-night stands), raising a family, holding her baby child. She doesn't want a one-night stand (like I said, she has "high morals"), she wants a family. This is probably my fault, I left out a lot of details, didn't feel like typing them all out.
FryBender, I'm not sure of the details, she did not go in-depth into her conditions. She was mostly talking about her life and her dreams. That said, I THINK (I can't be sure) that her father had HIV, her mother got HIV from her father and her mother's HIV developed into AIDS. During birth, HIV (presumably) was transferred to my friend. I don't think my friends has AIDS because she seemed to be in decent condition (AKA not worrying about her life every waking minute). I'm sorry about any inaccuracies, I wasn't in the mood to worry about such distinctions.
By the way, I'm sure you guys can find alternative means of pregnancy so that she can raise a family despite having HIV. She's not interested in that either... she doesn't want to pass it on. "Let the disease die with me" sort of mindset
Anyway, the shock is slowly disappearing. I don't know if I overreacted or not, nothing like this has EVER happened to me before. I found out why she was so interested in sex, she wanted to understand everything about it so she looked it up in books, etc. and became more curious. No, I am not interested in the best way to bang her without contracting HIV myself.
I'm not in love with her either, she was an acquaintance and I think I can call her a friend now. I never had thoughts of getting into a relationship with her.
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TLADT24920 Posts
That new information is big but regardless, I think she needs your support. I can understand her viewpoint and it's sad but nothing can be done about it I'm afraid 
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On July 02 2012 05:42 Otolia wrote:
For fuck sake, man up put a condom and enjoy sex. Don't listen to those sheeps who are telling you not to enjoy yourself. As long as you don't stick your tongue in any holes except the mouth, remember to wash yourselves after sex and put have a good quality condom ALL THE TIME, you should be fine.
TL community, you should be ashamed of propagating lies like this. This kind of alienation really pisses me off.
don't listen to this freaking idiot! How the fuck can you even pretend that sex with an HIV positive person is safe? They carrying a freaking virus that kills you man! I'm not saying you should dodge her or not have sex with her, but pretending it's completely safe is utterly retarded.
OP: if you love this girl then proceed, but be aware that you will probably not grow old together, and that there is a very realistic chance of being infected.
I hope that girl will one day be cured, or at least lead a happy live, but I'd be lying if I told you that I wouldn't get out of there..
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On July 02 2012 13:55 Entirety wrote:
Guys, I'm not going to fuck her. Condom or no condom.
I think there's a misunderstanding here... it's not that she feels deprived of sex. She feels deprived of what sex represents - a partner for life (no one-night stands), raising a family, holding her baby child. She doesn't want a one-night stand (like I said, she has "high morals"), she wants a family. This is probably my fault, I left out a lot of details, didn't feel like typing them all out.
FryBender, I'm not sure of the details, she did not go in-depth into her conditions. She was mostly talking about her life and her dreams. That said, I THINK (I can't be sure) that her father had HIV, her mother got HIV from her father and her mother's HIV developed into AIDS. During birth, HIV (presumably) was transferred to my friend. I don't think my friends has AIDS because she seemed to be in decent condition (AKA not worrying about her life every waking minute). I'm sorry about any inaccuracies, I wasn't in the mood to worry about such distinctions.
By the way, I'm sure you guys can find alternative means of pregnancy so that she can raise a family despite having HIV. She's not interested in that either... she doesn't want to pass it on. "Let the disease die with me" sort of mindset
Anyway, the shock is slowly disappearing. I don't know if I overreacted or not, nothing like this has EVER happened to me before. I found out why she was so interested in sex, she wanted to understand everything about it so she looked it up in books, etc. and became more curious. No, I am not interested in the best way to bang her without contracting HIV myself.
I'm not in love with her either, she was an acquaintance and I think I can call her a friend now. I never had thoughts of getting into a relationship with her.
Damn, that's sad as hell, it's like some chicken soup for the soul type of shit.
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pull a naked man. works 1/3 times.
User was warned for this post
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Can't she get it on with some guy who has HIV? If she doesn't want to have kids I suppose it makes sense, but sex should be fine if her partner has AIDS.
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EPT
