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as you are all-too well aware i have been whining the last X months/years of my life trying to make it so i don't absolutely hate my own guts and writhe in self-loathing and misery every day
so tomorrow/in the next few days i am finally putting together a lot of individual struggles that i have been trying to synchronise for a long time but have as yet been able to accomplish due to mental and physical weakness
1) guitar practice
2) regular gym
3) eating properly
4) stable job/income
5) clean and tidy house/room
6) quit smoking
7) no addiction to games or to watching things
8) no ejaculation to porn
9) time management
there are a few other things on the list but right now i am joyous to have these things currently in progress
1) guitar practice.
i started a month or 2 , again, and have been doing 10+ minutes per day approx. i have pretty much gotten down Coffee & TV by blur and Hotel California , using some/several barre chords. they are not good enough to record yet but my slow and steady practice has created a fantastic result so far.
2) regular gym.
i will resume regular gym, again, tomorrow. this is a pretty easy one as i have been practicing it for a long long time now. the key here is time management.
3) eating properly.
again, easy when practicing gym and time management. the issue here is just buying decent food and not slipping into fast/processed food.
4) stable job/income.
i have 2 dif jobs working 5 days a week currently. i am off work until friday due to time off for stress and then later for fractured rib. the stress from job compounds with time management to wreck pretty much everything. since i have had time off i have been able to gradually and finally reset the other things to allow this synchronisation. without time off from work i wouldnt be here, but since i had a breakdown and got time off... this needs to be improved with new/different job in the future. but currently exists in a decent state.
5) clean/tidy room.
i was putting this off for days, weeks, probably months. i just couldnt bring myself to do it nomatter what. i would tidy up but not clean properly. now i've done it.
6) quit smoking.
we will see how this progressing as usual. i am confident again. more importantly, after the 6-7 days initial quitting has gone, i usually "stop caring" and resume smoking again. but with the other things synchronised, such as gym, this should now be sustainable.
7) addictions.
i am currently not addicted to watching anything or playing anything or browsing anything.
8) lack of energy and focus.
i am on day 5 of the reddit No Fap. this allows me to have WAY WAY more energy and focus. instead of fapping then wanting to just lie there or go back to sleep or continue fapping, it allows me to jump out of bed and get into action immediately. it makes me awake when talking to girls and doing other things.
9) time management .
this going to sleep early and waking up early. waking up early reduces the sense of stress and anxiety in completing other tasks such as gym and eating. i would rush to the gym, rush to work, not eat properly, not complete gym properly, and feel stressed out and anxious all the time, and hate on myself so much because of it.
these 9 things are all in order now and synchronising with one another to create a fantastically improved lifestyle. they synergise with one another and strengthen one another. they also allow for further developments to be made, at last.
possible further devs and additions:
1) new/different job
this will involve cutting a day or two at my current work to add a day at another workplace doing the same job, for variety/less stress and frustration/so i dont go crazy and hear voices from repetitive environment.
2) do work written course
it is retarded that i still failing to do this. even sit down for 5 minutes. but with these other things in place i should have the strength to start doing this.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/luTJL.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/kxuyj.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/8wWfC.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/sRaTi.jpg)
  
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Sounds like a PLAN! ^^
So organized hehe, wish I could just set a plan as good as yours and just follow it straight-up like a BAMF. While the categories aren't necessarily on the same level (in difficulty as well as scope; i.e. some goals are quite a bit more specific or broad than others), the overall plan still seems like an absolutely awesome way to set yourself up for success and happiness, and generally improve your life dramatically good job yo :D
Your art is also not bad at all!
Question though: what is reddit no fap? I mean, herp, I know you're just not supposed to fap, but is there a time limit on it or what? Also yeah not fapping 3x a day or maybe even daily might be a good thing, but wouldn't it be okay to fap maybe once or a few times a week or something along those lines? Enlighten me lol
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ahh well it took like 4+ years / many many many recent months of trying and failing everything to get to this stage in which i am succeeding in many things at once simultaeniously. a LOT of self loathing, a lot of misery and fucking up and anxiety and stress and hating on every waking moment.
reddit nofap you can google it. i havent really read about it, there were some short youtube documentaries about addiction and pornography. i tried it out for 4 days (easy since stress/depression makes my dick not very responsive to begin with atm) and then fapped on the 4th / 5th day and then noticed my "highish" energy levels plummetted for the rest of the day and i became complacent and didnt want to do anything.
so basically you can harness your sexual energy, when you are horny you can get up and feel alive and fresh like you want to dominate, and focused like you care about talking to people or whatever.
as for NEVER fapping, i dont know, i havent read about it but my friend tells me you can get all that information and read many many journals that people are writing about the experience, positive and negative effects, as they attempt it. heres one google link http://www.reddit.com/r/nofap
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Ah, so this is bigger of a breakthrough than I thought? Nice!! I know the EXACT same feelings you're describing though...maybe could learn a lesson or two from this, or at least accelerate myself to that point at which I personally decide to turn my life around as you did....seriously some congratulations are in order, then, because it's not a good feeling at all, especially the self-loathing just goes on for such a long time ><
I dunno though, I don't actually get super low energy levels after fapping really. Yes there's a drop but it's not a huge or sudden drop that leaves me lying around vegging out.I don't think I'd want to NEVER fap/ejaculate...I mean...once in a while it should be fine. Not fapping for extended periods of time does help with energy levels quite a bit, though; I'm with you on that (so energy level does drop considerably from the high but it's not exactly a crash and doesn't leave me lying around doing nothing). So what's your plan, then? Time limit or no? :o
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yeah its a huge huge deal really haha, the best ive ever been in my whole life (ex alcohlic, now 27 years old with literally nothing to show for my whole life, no skills or accomplishments whatsoever, no savings, earning 6/hour, insanely low self esteem and sense of self value)
the thing about nofap, its that jacking off to pornography X times per week is unnatural and men have become addicted to it without realising it, and without realising how it effects them. its all about addiction and the unnoticed effects that become noticed when you get rid of the addiction. i think people say you need to go 2 months to get out of the addiction. idk tho.
personally? my friend is doing it so i said "ok ill do it with you" so i honestly have no idea and dont care. i agree probably fapping like a madman once per week is probably what i'd prefer to do , but ill copy what hes doing for now and see
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Hm...yeah that sounds like a good idea, doing it so many times a week definitely does sort of pass the point where it's natural I suppose. GL to you and your friend (with the nofap and life in general, maybe I'll try the nofap out next time I feel like I've been fapping too much and see where it takes me as well =__=)!!
And wow, you've overcome some tough shit...at 27... 6/hour and everything listed there must have been really scary. Not even being pitying or what have you--that is some grade A bs life tossed your way. You're a software dev working at a start-up right? Best of luck there too!! 
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hah no , i am a care assistant . if i was a software dev i would have some sort of skill to my name :D and none of the BS was tossed my way, i flung myself gleefully into it all and now have the burden of consequence. but you live and learn
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Ah I suppose >.<
Man I could have sworn you were a software dev for some reason, dafuq? Well anyway, soldier on yo! But how come only I commented?! I feel somewhat responsible boo T.T Live and learn is true though, glad you're still up, living, and learning~
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EPT
