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Some background, I am 22 she is 17. I met her at a party in her house in New York State.
We didn't have intercourse, and she consented to everything that we did.
Now, here's where it gets complicated. The owner of the house (may be her guardian) is a lawyer and texted me. Threatening me to call one of his NYPD "friends" to come over my house and arrest me for rape. I called him and he sounded angry as hell, saying she is a minor and to stop the fuck away from his family?
She lives with her mom in his house but the mom and the old guy are not married and I am not sure if he is her guardian or not. Either way, the mom could charge me right?
I am more scared of the dad cuz he's a lawyer and could do some under the table moves to fuck me over.
ANY LAWYERS WITH ADVICE PLEASE? I am shitting my pants right now.
 
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Australia8532 Posts
The age of consent in New York is 17; so the only problem is consent. Then it comes down to a he said she said argument. Keep the text - that is hilarious that he was stupid enough to put a threat in writing. That is major leverage.
I am not from the US but those are my thoughts 
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I am not a lawyer but according to Wikipedia the age of consent in New York State is 17, so unless she is claiming you raped or otherwise sexually assaulted her, you should be okay? I personally would not contact this person further.
If the cops come ask to see a warrant.
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Osaka27149 Posts
If it was consensual, and she isn't saying it is rape, just ignore him. If the girl says it is rape, well, then you have a he said she said problem.
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Nah, she is 100% 17 years old. Will be 18 in august, we both consented of course. It's the mom and "dad" who are freaking out.
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Keep all communication he sends to you. It sounds like whats happened is that he's pissed off that his daughter had sex and wants to take it out on someone. Leave it for a few days for him to calm down and go from there. It's highly likely he will simply lose interest. If he decides to take it further, as has been said previously, it's simply a he said she said but if you both agree there is no problem.
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I would not reply to it and just avoid her/him/that house in future.
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pedorapist!
+ Show Spoiler +....not at all.You did nothing wrong.
You didn't even have intercourse with said girl.You should be fine, even if that guy is a lawyer.
IF he would have the audacity to try to get at you through "under table moves", this would most likely be a case of slander, and you would be able to counter-sue him, using a REAL lawyer.
If I were you, I'd take it fairly easy. If you're telling us the truth about what went down (I see no reason why you wouldn't), you should be fine.
EDIT: 100th post...
What I expected:
+ Show Spoiler +
What really happened:
+ Show Spoiler +
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it's rape if you gave her alcohol, otherwise you are fine
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Hes just trying to scare you, in any case just ignore and move on.
(Keep the sms btw)
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I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first?
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On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first?
why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!)
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Man, being right around your age I couldn't imagine hanging out with a 17 year old, let alone date one. W/e to each his own. You should have np with legal issues as long as you aren't retarded, though you might have an angry old man with a shotgun in your face if you're not careful.
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He can't say you raped her, only she can. wtf.
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I'm not familiar with specific NY criminal law, but rape requires sex without her consent. You didn't have sex with her, therefore no rape.
If you guys did other sexual acts, that could constitute sodomy and possibly battery. I'm not sure if NY has laws against sodomy, but that is something you can look up. Inappropriate contact with another person can also be a battery, but you two were at a party and presumably hooked up therefore there was implied consent to touch.
Now about this lawyer old guy who's threatening you: Keep the text message and don't stress too much about it. He was likely just pissed off and was flashing his feathers at ya.
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You at the very least made out with a 17-year-old, in her parents' house, when her parents were there?
...
If the father is looking for some kind of ammunition against you, then you may as well just not talk to him. Not worth making the mistake of saying something that could be taken out of context but still used against you. If you think you can resolve the issue civilly, then arrange to meet him and just talk it over. Stay cool - you did nothing wrong. Tell him the events as they happened, obviously excluding any details about the naughty.
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While a lot of the advise here is correct, it is not encompassing of everything you have to be concerned about - the law can get really complicated with respect to sexual assault, so don't think you're clear just because it isn't mentioned here as you didn't provide much information. It all depends on the circumstances. Rape, sexual assault, regular assault, etc. are all different possibilities with different criteria.
Also, it happens all the time where even if there was consent, the girl changes her mind and says there wasn't consent in order to avoid anger and embarrassment from their family. It can be a big pain in the ass, so don't hook up with girls who live with their parents and who might be inclined to flip-flop on you after the fact.
Hell, we had a case in here a while ago where we did a standard divorce. The woman had come into the office, signed all the papers, smiled, shook our hand and left - we filed all the papers and that was that. Then, after the weekend, we got in to the office and there were about 50 people with signs protesting in front of the firm. Turns out she went home, someone found out about the divorce, and in her culture divorce is not allowed - so in order to avoid public embarrassment and shunning she had told them that she had been tricked into the divorce and she didn't mean to.
Goddamn flip-floppers!
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I would just talk with the "father" and apologize for upsetting him. Don't admit you did anything wrong, but just apologize that you pissed him off.
For being a "lawyer" he's pretty dumb for putting a threat in writing. I don't really think anything will happen to you unless the girl says she was raped or taken advantage of.
Also I didn't see anything about alcohol in the OP, but some people are addressing that. If there was no alcohol involved, you should be fine. But if there was, you can get into trouble, even if it isn't for sexual reasons.
They are probably pissed off at her, but taking it out on you. By apologizing, you might cool him down a bit.
If he still continues to rage at you, just save his text messages and any other contacts, and you should be fine unless you did something wrong.
But I'm not a lawyer so... If you really feel that threatened by it, maybe you do need to talk to one. Even an initial consultation might be helpful. Sure you might get charged $300 for it, but you could learn a lot, like if there even is a need to pay further for a defense.
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On June 21 2011 02:34 jacosajh wrote:
I would just talk with the "father" and apologize for upsetting him. Don't admit you did anything wrong, but just apologize that you pissed him off.
For being a "lawyer" he's pretty dumb for putting a threat in writing. I don't really think anything will happen to you unless the girl says she was raped or taken advantage of.
Also I didn't see anything about alcohol in the OP, but some people are addressing that. If there was no alcohol involved, you should be fine. But if there was, you can get into trouble, even if it isn't for sexual reasons.
They are probably pissed off at her, but taking it out on you. By apologizing, you might cool him down a bit.
If he still continues to rage at you, just save his text messages and any other contacts, and you should be fine unless you did something wrong.
This seems like good advice if you plan on seeing the girl again.
If you don't plan on dating this girl, or whatever, I wouldn't waste your breath...
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You don't waste your breathe if it could potentially save you from going to court. Whether or not the "father" has any grounds for "justice" doesn't mean it can stop him from harassing him verbally or financially.
If he's pissed off enough, he can proceed with a case, making him have to pay for a defense or just go through the sheer inconvenience. If the "father" really is a lawyer, he certainly has the resources to pull it off.
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On June 21 2011 02:47 jacosajh wrote:
You don't waste your breathe if it could potentially save you from going to court. Whether or not the "father" has any grounds for "justice" doesn't mean it can stop him from harassing him verbally or financially.
If he's pissed off enough, he can proceed with a case, making him have to pay for a defense or just go through the sheer inconvenience. If the "father" really is a lawyer, he certainly has the resources to pull it off.
I was more thinking that if you don't plan on romantically seeing her again, you coming by and speaking to him is probably going to be more salt-in-the-wound than anything. And if he is already sending ridiculous texts...I'm skeptical as to how receptive he will be to an apology (or whatever it is you would say).
I don't think its up to the father to proceed with a case? In Canada it is the decision of the crown prosecutors. Inconvenience would be had as they collect evidence though.
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How often has he texted you?
When was the last time he texted you?
Has anyone else contacted you?
Has he said anything more besides threatening to go after you?
What is the girl's stance recently (I know she said she consented, anything else? Has she talked to them about it?)
Was there alcohol at that party (a bit odd if there was. He has a minor drinking at his house, yet gets mad when she fools around? That's something to note). Were either of you drunk, tipsy or taken advantage of (consenting when drunk is a gray line, no?)
I think that's all I want to ask. :3
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Important questions to answer ^^
also i think its really important what she thinks right now
as has been said about *flip flopping*
shes the one that can really get you in trouble.
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On June 21 2011 04:35 largedong wrote:
I would call the father and ask him if she has any younger sisters
lol gave me something to laugh about but a terrible terrible idea xD
But honestly... how fucking stupid. He's a lawyer? Good God, he really is holding true to the reasons why people hate them in general. Lying/Manipulative lol. You have nothing to worry about other than the fact that this girl's 'father' seems like a total dick.
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On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:Show nested quote +On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!)
actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
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On June 21 2011 04:57 OmniEulogy wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 04:35 largedong wrote:
I would call the father and ask him if she has any younger sisters lol gave me something to laugh about but a terrible terrible idea xD But honestly... how fucking stupid. He's a lawyer? Good God, he really is holding true to the reasons why people hate them in general. Lying/Manipulative lol. You have nothing to worry about other than the fact that this girl's 'father' seems like a total dick.
+1lololol also -- lawyers dont really act like that - sounds like a guy wanting to sound like a lawyer to TROLOLOL you so its highly probable it will never come to action
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take note that the father could be a tl user also. who knows, maybe one of us is trying to get you to say something that could be used against you.
..or maybe i'm just being paranoid if i were to put myself in your shoes. :X
but seriously, 99% of my mind is saying that he isn't a a lawyer. he's just saying the most ridiculous statement that would cause you stress. more importantly, he probably wants you to think twice before you do what you do with his daughter..aka stay the fuck away from her.
personally, i'd talk to the daughter in person and hear her story (if he is indeed a lawyer and that she agrees that she consented. maybe bring a voice recorder just in case (lol i would really p*** my pants if i were in your situation right now). or if you have to balls to talk to her father, then do that. realistically speaking, i'd be a pussy to do that - it's just hard to talk to someone who's emotions override his logic.
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Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk.
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On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk.
So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter?
You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse).
You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?)
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On June 21 2011 05:42 Vulcano wrote:Show nested quote +On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!) actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually
are you implying that having sex with people under 25 should be rape?
go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
for the record, my girlfriend is 15 days younger than me, i am saying simply for the idea of the matter.. also, she can't royally fuck up his world any more than any other LEGAL girl can. she is legal, the only way he could be in trouble is if she says it was non-consensual, OR if he gave her alcohol or some other drug
On June 21 2011 06:22 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk. So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter? You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse). You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?)
not sure about NY, but in ohio at least, parent/guardians can (legally) provide alcohol to their children
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On June 21 2011 07:31 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 05:42 Vulcano wrote:On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!) actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually are you implying that having sex with people under 25 should be rape? Show nested quote +
go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
for the record, my girlfriend is 15 days younger than me, i am saying simply for the idea of the matter.. also, she can't royally fuck up his world any more than any other LEGAL girl can. she is legal, the only way he could be in trouble is if she says it was non-consensual, OR if he gave her alcohol or some other drug Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 06:22 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk. So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter? You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse). You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?) not sure about NY, but in ohio at least, parent/guardians can (legally) provide alcohol to their children
With supervision, no?
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On June 21 2011 07:58 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 07:31 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 21 2011 05:42 Vulcano wrote:On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!) actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually are you implying that having sex with people under 25 should be rape?
go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
for the record, my girlfriend is 15 days younger than me, i am saying simply for the idea of the matter.. also, she can't royally fuck up his world any more than any other LEGAL girl can. she is legal, the only way he could be in trouble is if she says it was non-consensual, OR if he gave her alcohol or some other drug On June 21 2011 06:22 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk. So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter? You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse). You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?) not sure about NY, but in ohio at least, parent/guardians can (legally) provide alcohol to their children With supervision, no?
yea, with supervision.. but i think (think) they were around when she was drinking, we'd have to have the OP clarify
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Parents were there with alcohol and she is age of consent. What is her stance of the situation, does she know that her dad is communicating with you?
The dad has nothing on you unless the girl says something to royally fuck you over otherwise not much can be done.
However if you don't wish to pursue the girl in a relationship beyond friendship i advise you to step away and let the heat blow off and explain the situation. If you do then sit down and talk to mom (forget about the "dad" unless he further threatens you)
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On June 21 2011 08:41 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 07:58 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 07:31 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 21 2011 05:42 Vulcano wrote:On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!) actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually are you implying that having sex with people under 25 should be rape?
go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
for the record, my girlfriend is 15 days younger than me, i am saying simply for the idea of the matter.. also, she can't royally fuck up his world any more than any other LEGAL girl can. she is legal, the only way he could be in trouble is if she says it was non-consensual, OR if he gave her alcohol or some other drug On June 21 2011 06:22 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk. So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter? You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse). You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?) not sure about NY, but in ohio at least, parent/guardians can (legally) provide alcohol to their children With supervision, no? yea, with supervision.. but i think (think) they were around when she was drinking, we'd have to have the OP clarify
They went to bed.
Clearly not enough supervision.
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On June 21 2011 09:09 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 08:41 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 21 2011 07:58 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 07:31 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 21 2011 05:42 Vulcano wrote:On June 20 2011 23:27 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:On June 20 2011 15:42 Zlasher wrote:
I don't fuck around with the age of consent dude...she's 5 years younger than you didn't that bother you a bit at first? why should it? it's not like he's having sex with a kid - by that age she's at least mature enough to make informed sexual decisions (that's an assumption of course, as far as I know she is not handicapped!) actually its much like having sex with a kid. many 25 year olds (let alone 17 year olds, what is that a junior or senior in high school?!) in modern day society (especially the ones living with their parents) still arent mature enough to make sensible decisions. dont rely on the 'i can get this chick because she is way younger and more impressionable than i am' actually are you implying that having sex with people under 25 should be rape?
go out and find someone your own age -- at which point you will never have to worry about being accused of rape, statutory or otherwise.
as far as the law is concerned, she could royally fuck your world up by just saying that you raped her, placing you on naughty lists that you dont want to be on, however it sounds more like a family drama affair due to your and her most worthwhile fling
dont step in shit and you wont have to smell it
for the record, my girlfriend is 15 days younger than me, i am saying simply for the idea of the matter.. also, she can't royally fuck up his world any more than any other LEGAL girl can. she is legal, the only way he could be in trouble is if she says it was non-consensual, OR if he gave her alcohol or some other drug On June 21 2011 06:22 Torte de Lini wrote:On June 21 2011 06:13 Rev0lution wrote:
Yes, he's a corporate lawyer in some company I don't know about.
She has been talking to me on facebook and chatting. We talk on the phone a lot as well.
First I got messages from the mom. The "dad" messaged me once only, I called him back and he was very pissed off.
By the way, the family provided alcohol and she was drinking in their presense. They went to sleep and I stayed with her. We were not drunk at all, we kissed a little and then hours passed and we were pretty much sober. Then she went to an empty room and called me to go in, yada yada.
We had Coors light for fucks sake, that shit never gets you drunk. So basically he's mad you slept with his daughter but provided the alcohol for their underaged daughter? You do realize you have the upperhand here, right? While I don't suggest for you to provoke them, if they do follow-up with their case, you have a big trump card that not only incriminates them, but can also be impled that they, too, consented for such a thing to happen (if they allow their underaged daughter to responsibly drink, then one can say she is responsible or mature enough to make her own decisions about her sexual discourse). You're fine bro, don't worry about it. There wasn't even any intercourse, oral sex isn't even that big of a deal. No penetration, no problem (how the hell did they even find out?) not sure about NY, but in ohio at least, parent/guardians can (legally) provide alcohol to their children With supervision, no? yea, with supervision.. but i think (think) they were around when she was drinking, we'd have to have the OP clarify They went to bed. Clearly not enough supervision.
oh i agree, i'm not trying to say that they are good parents at all... this situation clearly tells us that!
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maybe her "dad" is pissed that you got to her before he did  ...
lol jk
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Thanks for the reassurance, when I heard his call I wasn't thinking clearly but now that I've done some research I know there is no way for him to get me at all. That is unless the girl accuses me herself, which is highly unlikely.
"Dad" was probably just trying to scare the living shit out of me. It worked, but temporarily.
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Oh man, you are stooped if she says that she didn't agree >.< Stories like these are fucking horrible lol
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On June 21 2011 10:42 Rev0lution wrote:
Thanks for the reassurance, when I heard his call I wasn't thinking clearly but now that I've done some research I know there is no way for him to get me at all. That is unless the girl accuses me herself, which is highly unlikely.
"Dad" was probably just trying to scare the living shit out of me. It worked, but temporarily.
On your whole story, I'd say you were cutting the lines a tad close. But that's probably also a bit why she's into you. (Doesn't necessarily make what you did wise, but wisdom isn't what we're talking about here)
Now, on the situation.
- Get that Text message saved
- You need to show that text message to several people you know; hopefully 1-2 you can trust but that aren't necessarily.
- Take a few pictures of the text message, and save those pictures in a few spots.
- Look up in the New York State laws the exact passages covering consent/age of consent
- Make sure you also look up the rules for sexual contact that isn't intercourse (these are different and some states have VERY different rules; some states have rules that cover, effectively, "debauchery with a minor"). You need to have a very firm grasp of the laws in the area of law that the "father" just threatened you over. He made a possibly criminal threat against you, you have to be prepared if anything keeps going.
- Figure out what company he works for, what division (it's likely nothing to do with criminal law, which means he's just talking out his ass). And have the contact information for his HR &/or compliance office.
- Figure out how to file a complaint with the New York State Bar Association (the licensing body for NY attorneys)
You basically *are* in the advantage if anything happens, but *only* if you are prepared. Getting an avalanche of hell coming your way suddenly is the fastest way to get screwed up worst. Most problems in the questionable situations are given to the passive party. That text from the "dad" is likely an ace in the hole defense. And the other information is useful because, if things escalate, you have to be prepared to strike back. You can make his life just as bad as yours. But you would *never* mention this to anyone. You just have to establish the time frame for the text and all parties involved.
(I might suggest making Hotmail, Yahoo & Gmail accounts and send yourself screenshots of the pictures you take; it helps establish the time frame again. Oh, and get those screenshots of the chats with the girl. Logs of that is useful as well.)
I do assume you ended up in the middle of a family dispute, but that isn't terribly important. Your job is to take care of yourself. You also have to be mindful of the possibility that your girlfriend is effectively just using you against her parents. What she told them might be different than what happened.
But, to be clear on my personal opinion, keep it in your pants for a while. You're treading on dangerous ground.
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On June 21 2011 10:42 Rev0lution wrote:
Thanks for the reassurance, when I heard his call I wasn't thinking clearly but now that I've done some research I know there is no way for him to get me at all. That is unless the girl accuses me herself, which is highly unlikely.
"Dad" was probably just trying to scare the living shit out of me. It worked, but temporarily.
Ask him if he'll backtrace you.
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On June 21 2011 12:42 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On June 21 2011 10:42 Rev0lution wrote:
Thanks for the reassurance, when I heard his call I wasn't thinking clearly but now that I've done some research I know there is no way for him to get me at all. That is unless the girl accuses me herself, which is highly unlikely.
"Dad" was probably just trying to scare the living shit out of me. It worked, but temporarily. Ask him if he'll backtrace you.
Maybe he has some internet police sources
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High likelihood it won't go to court. If it does, you better have people ready to testify that they let their daughter drink and that it was in the context of a party (although the fact that you have evidence of the two of you being 'sweethearts' of sorts is a big boost to your potential defense). Normally they'd have nothing on you, but rape/sexual assault is a touchy thing and can sometimes hinge simply on the testimony of the victim.
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