EPTWhy is it that most parents go insane? - Page 2
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Tenryu
United States565 Posts
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Kingfisher
Canada144 Posts
Now I just don't give a fuck. Because if I did, I probably ended up hanging by a rope. | ||
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niteReloaded
Croatia5282 Posts
They probably work their asses of to provide for the family and are probably often very tired and have little energy left. In those situations, little things like leaving cereal box on the counter can make you feel like your children don't appreciate what you're doing, and if you believe that thought, you go apeshit like described in the OP. The Work by Byron Katie is perfect for situations like this... you may try it if your family is the type that talks about problems. | ||
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MooCow
1434 Posts
As I grew older I learned to love my parents and appreciate everything they have ever done for me. I don't know if your parents are the same or if they are always bitchy or whatever but basically I never appreciated them until I grew older. ^ Nitereloaded has it right. | ||
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duckett
United States589 Posts
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eMbrace
United States1300 Posts
On November 02 2009 07:35 niteReloaded wrote: Because parents are only human and don't have the perfect awareness of how things REALLY are. They probably work their asses of to provide for the family and are probably often very tired and have little energy left. In those situations, little things like leaving cereal box on the counter can make you feel like your children don't appreciate what you're doing, and if you believe that thought, you go apeshit like described in the OP. The Work by Byron Katie is perfect for situations like this... you may try it if your family is the type that talks about problems. well yeah, i'm sure my parents lead very busy lives and aren't always in a good mood when they get back from work -- but yelling about small things makes things a lot worse. it stresses out them, their children, and arguments start. why do they want to ruin the rest of the time they have off? one little thing starts a rampage that goes on for an hour. first it was a cereal box -- than it leads to other small chores -- then it turns into chores that you wouldn't even think of (i.e. "why don't you guys clean the leaves out of the gutters!!!??") -- then it goes to insulting your children's daily lives. and during all this, i'll be calm -- i'll ignore their insults and do whatever ridiulous things they ask, and then one of my siblings will understandably loose their cool and fight back, and then it turns into a real shit storm. all because you couldn't keep your bad day at work, and that a left out cereal box means your kids don't love you? | ||
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LaLuSh
Sweden2358 Posts
On November 02 2009 07:16 micronesia wrote: From the sound of it he does everything right (of course he's probably exaggerating at least a little or omitting details without meaning to) and has every right to feel frustration. And rather than resort to screaming at his parents or threatening to stop doing what he already does such as take out the garbage, he's venting (in his own blog) in the hopes that he'll get some support and advice that will help him to find a solution that works for him without hurting his apparently over-stressed family. And what does he get? You making a complete asshole of yourself and acting like he's done something wrong. If you don't want to help him then that's fine. You owe him an apology for insulting him for no reason and you should just get the hell out if you have nothing to contribute... the OP has warranted neither insults nor trolling. edit: even after your immature accusations that he himself is being immature I see he is dealing with it appropriately and being polite. Props OP and gl with that very frustrating problem that I can relate to. Frits always comes in to every one of these threads waving his psychology degree around, or whatever pseudo degree it is that he has. He lays his carefully disguised trap and waits for someone to take the bait so he has a pretense to blurt out one or two carefully pre-planed freudian analogies in his retort (if you're some cognitive therapy quack i don't care). And if someone should be foolish enough to press on, he'll conclude by "subtly" mentioning his master's dissertation (or whatever i don't care) in said field. Usually there's no point in responding to this post. In his eyes he just killed the thread by putting forth the ultimate proof/argument. The thread has already served its purpose; his sense of self-importance is reassured. He won't be coming back to read your lowly plebeian replies. | ||
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Frits
11782 Posts
god you guys think everything is some kind of conspiracy, i just took offense to this particular OP, relax | ||
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DyEnasTy
United States3714 Posts
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SanguineToss
Canada815 Posts
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MountainDewJunkie
United States10346 Posts
But more recently, I looked back, I saw what a little ingrate I was, a smartass punk! They gave me shelter, security, food, clothing, braces for my fucked up teeth, let me drive their cars, etc. Even now, my dad chips in for my tuition! I didn't thank them for much of that as often as I should have, but I say we broke even, given the times they went moderately psycho on my ass for no reason (when all your siblings are goody-goody church-sucking curds, an atheistic, apathetic son like me seemed to irritate my parents to a high degree). Is there a right for me to complain? Sure. But it's pointless now. | ||
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inertinept
Bangladesh1195 Posts
On November 02 2009 06:47 Frits wrote: i hang out with friends too on a weekly basis you know what I dont do? make angry blogs about my parents like a 10 year old On November 02 2009 07:53 Frits wrote: im a 2nd year college student who just posted some random little fact god you guys think everything is some kind of conspiracy, i just took offense to this particular OP, relax can you honestly go back and read that and not think its a troll-like post (disregarding the fact that you wrote it)? anyways, this is part of what being a parent is about. your parents want to give you the life they never had, etc. and anything as small as "leaving out a cereal box" like you describe it can make them feel unappreciated when the majority of their life is based around their children. | ||
Manifesto7
Osaka27174 Posts
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Manifesto7
Osaka27174 Posts
And Frits you are such a douche bag. It is appalling. | ||
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eMbrace
United States1300 Posts
On November 02 2009 08:10 Manifesto7 wrote: Because you're parents gave up their lives freedom and money in order to raise you, and when you finally get to an age where you can help contribute to a house with EIGHT FUCKING KIDS you look them in the eye and say "I'll get to it". As if what you are doing now is more important. It isn't, not until you move out and have kids of your own. believe me, i understand this concept i just think that those situations can be handled in a way that makes living at home feel relaxing like it should. like, they don't blow up every time I tell them to "hold on." -- they just have to be in a certain mood. | ||
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Equaoh
Canada427 Posts
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NonY
8751 Posts
As far as explaining it, I guess it's mostly sociological and psychological. Somehow that kind of behavior from a parent to a child is acceptable/tolerated by the majority of people here. Psychologically, I think the behavior is mostly impulsive and people don't bother with self control if their behavior doesn't breach what is generally acceptable/tolerated. And then there's all kinds of details and forces at work why those things are the way they are, such as the twisted rationalization Mani offered :O | ||
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AcrossFiveJulys
United States3612 Posts
On November 02 2009 06:51 Ingenol wrote: One thing I learned is that doing one thing without being asked is worth doing ten things only upon being asked to do so. This is actually really true. It shows your parents that you finally understand what they are trying to teach you. Oftentimes they don't ask you to wash dishes because they don't want to it themselves, instead they are trying to teach you responsibility and whatnot. Let's relate it to a more concrete example: imagine you have a roommate or sibling who does something that annoys you, such as playing their music loudly when you are trying to sleep. What makes you feel like the situation is resolved better: every time you tell them to turn down the music they obey, or they don't play music when you are trying to sleep ever again? | ||
ArvickHero
10387 Posts
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Scarecrow
Korea (South)9174 Posts
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