EDIT: I read some people's response and many people recommend GTFO or telling her to get out of your face. To be honest, neither of these are viable choices. Lets go with the GTFO option; how are you going to pay for your post-secondary education? Your mother (BOOM! baby!). Now lets go with telling her to fuck off. Too crass. I recommend talking to her CALMLY. Talk about how you feel about your current situation. It must not degrade into "My life is terrible because of you!" drama.
Parent rage blog pt 6 - Page 3
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The_LiNk
Canada863 Posts
EDIT: I read some people's response and many people recommend GTFO or telling her to get out of your face. To be honest, neither of these are viable choices. Lets go with the GTFO option; how are you going to pay for your post-secondary education? Your mother (BOOM! baby!). Now lets go with telling her to fuck off. Too crass. I recommend talking to her CALMLY. Talk about how you feel about your current situation. It must not degrade into "My life is terrible because of you!" drama. | ||
Joementum
787 Posts
On December 30 2010 17:50 The_LiNk wrote: I know the point of this thread is to QQ and have people sympathize, but I find your mother to be perfectly normal. You see, unlike the stereotypical caucasian and most likely American parent, your mother actually cares about your mark and where you go for post secondary education. Although it seems like your mom is unsupportive with her put downs, she is merely trying to motivate you through her rage and fury. EDIT: I read some people's response and many people recommend GTFO or telling her to get out of your face. To be honest, neither of these are viable choices. Lets go with the GTFO option; how are you going to pay for your post-secondary education? Your mother (BOOM! baby!). Now lets go with telling her to fuck off. Too crass. I recommend talking to her CALMLY. Talk about how you feel about your current situation. It must not degrade into "My life is terrible because of you!" drama. Yeah, a parent that calls you a piece of shit isn't a good parent in the least bit. I don't care what you say. What the fuck is that supposed to do? Motivate the kid to get better grades than a 4.2 GPA? No, it does the exact opposite. It makes the kid believe he or she is a piece of shit and then their life just goes down hill from there. That's what happened to me in college these past 2 semesters. I'm called a lazy piece of shit all the time because I choose to go to bed at 4-5 am and wake up at 2 pm. It doesn't impact my parents lives in the least bit, but because it's not "normal" then something's wrong with me and I'm lazy. The fact that I only had 3 days of classes this semester sent them over the edge too. Never mind the fact that the 3 days were almost all day 9-5. The verbal abuse took its toll this semester. I just failed my first class, ever. Every time my parents just say that to me now, I tell them to fuck off (in a kind way, I don't say those words). I haven't been more distant with my parents than right now to be honest. All the verbal abuse has made me just not care. The one thing that's motivating me right now is getting the hell out of this house. I'm now going to take summer classes just to get my degree that much faster and just leave. Although they have gotten better lately, so it hasn't been that bad. We haven't had many arguments and we've actually been getting along like a family, so I guess there's that. Honestly OP, get the hell out. That's my 2 cents. If my friends weren't such leeches and leeched off their parents all the time, then I would definitely be gone. Living is NJ is just freaking expensive and I can't afford it on my own. Now, with 2-3 other people, it would be perfect. | ||
shinwa
Sweden225 Posts
On December 30 2010 17:50 The_LiNk wrote: I know the point of this thread is to QQ and have people sympathize, but I find your mother to be perfectly normal. You see, unlike the stereotypical caucasian and most likely American parent, your mother actually cares about your mark and where you go for post secondary education. Although it seems like your mom is unsupportive with her put downs, she is merely trying to motivate you through her rage and fury. EDIT: I read some people's response and many people recommend GTFO or telling her to get out of your face. To be honest, neither of these are viable choices. Lets go with the GTFO option; how are you going to pay for your post-secondary education? Your mother (BOOM! baby!). Now lets go with telling her to fuck off. Too crass. I recommend talking to her CALMLY. Talk about how you feel about your current situation. It must not degrade into "My life is terrible because of you!" drama. There's a difference between being strict and being an asshole. | ||
Gatsbi
United States1134 Posts
On December 30 2010 17:50 The_LiNk wrote: I know the point of this thread is to QQ and have people sympathize, but I find your mother to be perfectly normal. You see, unlike the stereotypical caucasian and most likely American parent, your mother actually cares about your mark and where you go for post secondary education. Although it seems like your mom is unsupportive with her put downs, she is merely trying to motivate you through her rage and fury. EDIT: I read some people's response and many people recommend GTFO or telling her to get out of your face. To be honest, neither of these are viable choices. Lets go with the GTFO option; how are you going to pay for your post-secondary education? Your mother (BOOM! baby!). Now lets go with telling her to fuck off. Too crass. I recommend talking to her CALMLY. Talk about how you feel about your current situation. It must not degrade into "My life is terrible because of you!" drama. Sounds like the same thing that happened to the OP happened to you too, and you have become so brainwashed by it you think it's a normal and good thing for parents to act this way. Don't end up like guy OP, GTFO while you can and/or make your voice heard, let them know what they are doing is having a negative impact on your academics and LIFE IN GENERAL (this is the more important one). | ||
The_LiNk
Canada863 Posts
Question: Are my academics suffering if I get 92% average? | ||
hypercube
Hungary2735 Posts
On December 30 2010 17:50 The_LiNk wrote: I know the point of this thread is to QQ and have people sympathize, but I find your mother to be perfectly normal. You see, unlike the stereotypical caucasian and most likely American parent, your mother actually cares about your mark and where you go for post secondary education. Although it seems like your mom is unsupportive with her put downs, she is merely trying to motivate you through her rage and fury. How about this one: She's angry about something else, possibly related to her own perceived failure in life. She wants to hurt someone and her kid is the obvious choice because she has so much power over him. Being angry over schoolwork is socially acceptable, which lets her get away with more than she could ever hope to over any other issue. This might not be the case, but I it's actually much more likely than her doing this because she cares so much about him. | ||
Gatsbi
United States1134 Posts
On December 31 2010 04:02 The_LiNk wrote: Never happened to me I must say. Parent's were demanding but it never got to OP's degree. Question: Are my academics suffering if I get 92% average? Why would your academics be suffering if you just stated it never got to the degree of the OP? Try making sense. | ||
Half
United States2554 Posts
Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like your 100% dependent on your parents, and your only responsibility towards them is maintaining a good mark. While honestly your mom is a bit of a psycho, its a quite understandable mindset they have. Count your lucky stars. By the sound of it, they aren't physically abusive, so start by distancing yourself from them and asserting your independence, and just ignoring them to the best of your ability. Get a job, cook your own food, etc. | ||
beetlelisk
Poland2276 Posts
On December 31 2010 04:20 Half wrote: Start acting like an adult and you'll start being treated like one. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like your 100% dependent on your parents, and your only responsibility towards them is maintaining a good mark. While honestly your mom is a bit of a psycho, its a quite understandable mindset they have. Count your lucky stars. By the sound of it, they aren't physically abusive, so start by distancing yourself from them and asserting your independence, and just ignoring them to the best of your ability. Get a job, cook your own food, etc. So what is yours story? You got called a worthless piece of shit and replied with "don't make me dinner, I'll cook my own" and it solved the problem? How is getting a job supposed to help him when he is 16 and has yet to get to a college? When they became parents they automaticly took the responisbilities that come with it. Cooking a dinner, and other "lucky stars" are their responsibilities and not an excuse to say and do whatever the fuck they want. | ||
Zoler
Sweden6339 Posts
On December 31 2010 05:20 beetlelisk wrote: So what is yours story? You got called a worthless piece of shit and replied with "don't make me dinner, I'll cook my own" and it solved the problem? How is getting a job supposed to help him when he is 16 and has yet to get to a college? You can have jobs in the evenings or the weekends, but I agree it's more his mom being a psycho lol. | ||
Froadac
United States6733 Posts
On December 31 2010 05:23 Zoler wrote: You can have jobs in the evenings or the weekends, but I agree it's more his mom being a psycho lol. I would like a job actually. But my mom says I can't get one until my grades are better, demonstrating responsibility. Also we always eat dinner together, and I make dinner like wtwice a week for the family. I'm sure my mom would be somewhat upset if I only cooked for myself, and would take it more as insult to cooking than self sufficiency. | ||
Krigwin
1130 Posts
On December 31 2010 04:20 Half wrote: Start acting like an adult and you'll start being treated like one. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like your 100% dependent on your parents, and your only responsibility towards them is maintaining a good mark. While honestly your mom is a bit of a psycho, its a quite understandable mindset they have. Count your lucky stars. By the sound of it, they aren't physically abusive, so start by distancing yourself from them and asserting your independence, and just ignoring them to the best of your ability. Get a job, cook your own food, etc. Wow, between going from blaming a kid for being dependant on his parents to saying it's understandable for parents to be complete bitches to saying someone is "lucky" their parents aren't abusive in every angle, I don't even know where to begin on how wrong this post is. That's a great attitude you have there though. Maybe we should just tell every child abuse victim to start "acting like an adult" and to "assert their independence". | ||
beetlelisk
Poland2276 Posts
For me what he said is so surreal I'm scared I would get accused of telling lies here. He didn't say it directly to me but did not deny it once I asked. Not only that, I was shocked how cold and condescending he was in his response, how he didn't see anything wrong with it. His belief in me doing things, even smiling (when I wasn't) just to piss him off was alarming and for a long time was one of the things that kept me under his control. But how the fuck did he come up with an idea that I would try to: attempt committing suicide by drinking alcohol only to anger him, only to make him furious? How the fuck did this cross his mind? He was so full of himself he called me some time later and asked what's up, because he thought I would just change my mind and be cool. The weirdest thing I've done in my life about 1,5 years later, in flat my sister was living, was watching live Korean BW and explaining him what was going on in the game once he showed up there and asked. Well now I can finish my wall of text. Also On December 31 2010 06:18 Krigwin wrote: Wow, between going from blaming a kid for being dependant on his parents to saying it's understandable for parents to be complete bitches to saying someone is "lucky" their parents aren't abusive in every angle, I don't even know where to begin on how wrong this post is. That's a great attitude you have there though. Maybe we should just tell every child abuse victim to start "acting like an adult" and to "assert their independence". This, absolutely. I will repeat myself now: When they became parents they automaticly took the responsibilities that come with it. Cooking a dinner, and other "lucky stars" are their responsibilities and not an excuse to say and do whatever the fuck they want. | ||
HeavOnEarth
United States7087 Posts
On December 31 2010 04:20 Half wrote: Start acting like an adult and you'll start being treated like one. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like your 100% dependent on your parents, and your only responsibility towards them is maintaining a good mark. While honestly your mom is a bit of a psycho, its a quite understandable mindset they have. Count your lucky stars. By the sound of it, they aren't physically abusive, so start by distancing yourself from them and asserting your independence, and just ignoring them to the best of your ability. Get a job, cook your own food, etc. here comes the self righteous "oh im from china i > u " everyone duck | ||
Froadac
United States6733 Posts
On December 31 2010 07:45 HeavOnEarth wrote: here comes the self righteous "oh im from china i > u " everyone duck As arnold would say GET DAUWN | ||
dahornnn
United Kingdom395 Posts
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