On Gender-Related Social Awkwardness - Page 3
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KevinIX
United States2472 Posts
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Rekrul
Korea (South)17174 Posts
guy talking to my roommate: yeah man i dont understand how u play that starcraft game so much like doesn't it dull your mind? like i'd rather have a life to be honest (i stay silent on this subject cuz whats the point) roommate: yeah i'm trying to cut down few mins later same guy: so dan where r u from? me: ohio but i've been living in korea for a few years guy: oh really? doing what? me as if i oblivious to what he just said, happily: oh i was a professional starcraft player guy: .....oh....wow i win | ||
Loser777
1931 Posts
In all seriousness, while I hate being stuck in a situation of mismatched interests as hotbid describes, I don't think that simply leaving like that is the best way to fight ignorance. You seem to be just as closed off from what your girl friends discuss as they are from your interests. Granted, you are the minority in this case, but if neither "side" pays attention to the other, nothing will ever change. Bah, writing something like that makes me a hypocrite. | ||
Peanutsc
United States277 Posts
On November 19 2010 16:10 Rekrul wrote: 3 of us talking, i just met guy guy talking to my roommate: yeah man i dont understand how u play that starcraft game so much like doesn't it dull your mind? like i'd rather have a life to be honest roommate: yeah i'm trying to cut down few mins later same guy: so dan where r u from? me: ohio but i've been living in korea for a few years guy: oh really? doing what? me as if i oblivious to what he just said, happily: oh i was a professional starcraft player guy: .....oh....wow i win If only I could do that. | ||
JohannesH
Finland1364 Posts
On November 19 2010 15:36 Luddite wrote:I've actually heard a lot of girls say things like "I don't get along well with other girls- I much prefer hanging out with guys". I've never heard any guy say something like that, except maybe for some gay men. I think maybe that attitude is an attempt for the woman to get more freedom for herself by breaking out of stereotyped female roles, and help her fit in as "one of the guys" instead of just being somebody's girlfriend. Maybe men who feel so just rather talk about it to women? | ||
onlinerobbe
Germany547 Posts
On November 19 2010 16:10 Rekrul wrote: + Show Spoiler + 3 of us talking, i just met guy guy talking to my roommate: yeah man i dont understand how u play that starcraft game so much like doesn't it dull your mind? like i'd rather have a life to be honest (i stay silent on this subject cuz whats the point) roommate: yeah i'm trying to cut down few mins later same guy: so dan where r u from? me: ohio but i've been living in korea for a few years guy: oh really? doing what? me as if i oblivious to what he just said, happily: oh i was a professional starcraft player guy: .....oh....wow i win I can only imagine how good that must have felt :D | ||
piroko139
United States261 Posts
The few times I've actually ventured into "normal" hangout times (which essentially can be boiled down into drinking at someone's place), I cannot get into the conversation. I recently attempted to start to socialize more to break the mold of being the hermit in my apartment that only leaves to go to work or eat. It ended with my lack of motivation to engage in conversation for the following reasons. I don't watch sports. I'm a virgin. I don't drink. I don't smoke. The only common topic I can even share with everyone else essentially is complaining about our job. We do that enough at work, it gets tiresome after a while. I guess being the quiet guy will just have to suit me for a while longer. | ||
Fatty800
United States50 Posts
i literally have one female friend that i hang out with and we tried to get her into sc2. bought the game for her birthday but she doesnt have a good computer to play on i talk to other girls about class/school/group projects but i dont feel a sense of closeness or have enough things in common to continue to communicate once the class is over. in the end, i kind of gave up on the thought of trying to fit in with the girls in class and just read a novel while on break. i wish they would keep it down cause im trying to read! just hearing some of them talk kind of angers me too -_- | ||
SunsetSC2
Australia148 Posts
I have all guy friends, outside of work, and I can talk lovely nerdiness with them, but even they don't get SC2 - they mostly play console games, or just play LoL and DOTA-ish games. Luckily, funnily enough, my girl friends from work, even though they're not into SC2, I can sit and explain to them how SC2 works and if I went up my league or how I'm in the process of playing silvers to get promoted, and they listen very attentively and ask questions and are genuinely excited for me. Also luckily, they're not girls who talk about cramps or placentas. Even when we drink. So that's a plus. | ||
PackofHighly
United States153 Posts
Why? Because I am who I am. I'm nerdy as hell. I don't like talking to people about whatever ridiculous nonsense they bring upon themselves by failing to communicate honestly with the people they supposedly care about. I don't want to spend an evening without access to a computer. I don't want to force myself to act "normal." That's what I've done when I go into those social situations. They always start with the thought of " really should stop spending all my time doing nerdyactivityx and hang out with some 'friends'" Yet each of those times I give in to that ridiculous reasoning I find myself bored, if not utterly disgusted by "normalness." And by the time things are over, I've reminded myself I'm quite un-normal, and I'll never be normal, but that's okay! Instead of torturing myself by doing things I hate, next time I'll just relax and remember that I don't need to be who I'm not. Besides, I'm already married, who do I have to impress? And even if you're reading this and you're not, don't waste your time by trying to impress someone who would never be impressed with you being your self. | ||
SoManyDeadLings
Canada255 Posts
"Yes, but only HARECORE games, like Starcraft". I quadruple facepalmed about seven times if your story was true. Dude. Dude... | ||
ConsummateK
United States98 Posts
On November 19 2010 22:48 SoManyDeadLings wrote: "Are you a gamer?" "Yes, but only HARECORE games, like Starcraft". I quadruple facepalmed about seven times if your story was true. Dude. Dude... I'm pretty sure this was in reference to the Iphone games that had been previously brought up in the conversation. Hooray for ignoring context. | ||
Happy.fairytail
United States327 Posts
nice blog, peanut. as socially awkward it can be, I do think meeting people who have vastly different backgrounds and values can be really interesting and valuable. also, congratz on reaching silver! | ||
zzaaxxsscd
United States626 Posts
baby this, baby that diaper and stroller brands how I lost weight after giving birth ginormous cost of raising children best areas for elementary school my son/daughter is a genius ...you get the point this is why I don't hang out with my wife and her friends any more --- the perils of being a nerd/geek/gamer --- good thing we have MMO and TL! | ||
ZeaL.
United States5955 Posts
On November 19 2010 23:42 zzaaxxsscd wrote: well, wait a few years and it'll be baby this, baby that diaper and stroller brands how I lost weight after giving birth ginormous cost of raising children best areas for elementary school my son/daughter is a genius ...you get the point this is why I don't hang out with my wife and her friends any more --- the perils of being a nerd/geek/gamer --- good thing we have MMO and TL! Thank god my girlfriends friend's haven't all gotten married and spawned broodlings. One of her acquaintances got teen pregnant and all she does is talk about her kid x.x, the rest of of them thankfully are gonna be at least a few years. In 10 years though its going to be hell. I actually don't mind hanging out with "normal" girls right now though, I'm fine with being the bizarrely pervy guy who brings up placenta in a non medical setting but is non threatening because he has a girlfriend. | ||
Peanutsc
United States277 Posts
On November 19 2010 18:49 OverlordFatty wrote: wow peanut. LETS BE FRIENDS!!! should come hang with us for food/gsl/day9/sc2 talks if you're in LA (which i am assuming you are in and not because i am stalking you). i literally have one female friend that i hang out with and we tried to get her into sc2. bought the game for her birthday but she doesnt have a good computer to play on i talk to other girls about class/school/group projects but i dont feel a sense of closeness or have enough things in common to continue to communicate once the class is over. in the end, i kind of gave up on the thought of trying to fit in with the girls in class and just read a novel while on break. i wish they would keep it down cause im trying to read! just hearing some of them talk kind of angers me too -_- I would love to hang out with you! Unfortunately I'm not in LA - I'm in NorCal south of SF. But next time I'm in the area for an event or something (BlizzCon, WCG, whatever), we should get together! Edit: Nobody wants to ask about the LAN party house? Awwww ... | ||
WilliamDecker
Canada43 Posts
Don't go out for Chinese food when you really want Italian. If being a girly girl isn't fun. Don't put yourself in the situation. To relate it to being a man, and also being nerdy. I have friends who are really manly men. Hunt, fish, work in welding shops. These aren't the guys I bring up Starcraft with. It is nice to get together with the to discuss manly things, or do manly things. Play sports. Barbecue. I used to hunt, I fish (and want to fish more), and enjoy getting out and not being a nerd sometimes. You need this to even yourself out. Same with women. My sister and I are very close. She's quite a girly girl and is also a tomboy when she needs to be. Being able to adapt and enjoy the company of others is never a bad thing. If you invited one of your girly girl friends over to a LAN party you'd want them to do their best to participate rather than sit there and be thinking about how she'd rather be doing anything else. I think you could have took the opportunity to find some commonalities between the group of you. I'm not saying you need to be like them, but you need to engage them more to find out what you have in common. Pretty much everyone can find something they can relate on. That's the whole point of getting to know new people Food brings people together. My wife is anything but a nerd, but she likes to engage with me on things I enjoy...even if I don't understand it. She knows who Day9 is. She knows what the GSL is. I also know what Reiki is. It's my duty to try to enjoy the things she enjoys. I don't expect her to participate, nor does she expect me to, but we get along just find being different in some things and the exact same in others. Our fundamentals, the people we are, and what we appreciate about other people are what bring us together. It's never a bad thing to bring yourself outside your comfort zone. Regardless how you look at it...you grew a little! Glad you enjoyed the hummus! | ||
Leahbjackson
United States107 Posts
The dinner you went to in this OP sounds so much like any sort of family outing or dinner with friends of work friends that I'm not really acquainted with. Not only do I feel completely out of place at these social gatherings, but I feel shy and like I can't ever be myself because I'll get made fun of or ridiculed. I completely agree that when you're with "normal women" (yes, you and I are not mutants aka we're normal, but you know what I mean) that it's very hard to open up and discuss things that I enjoy because they simply won't know how the fuck to react. It's kind of funny, because I work in the E! and Style building in Los Angeles. Every single day I'm surrounded by tons of beautiful women that are all really smart in their field, dress nice, smell like flowers, all that crap. I tomboy it up 99% of the time and often wonder if I'm missing something by not being like those girls. Throughout all of college I lived with 7 guys, all complete nerds, and whenever I feel like I'm "less" of a person because I'm not one of the "E! girls" I just think about how much fun I had with those guys, nerds in general, and how much more fun it is to just be myself and be a nerd and talk about how awesome it is to get promoted leagues in SC2 because that shit is the best. Don't ever change. | ||
SolidusR
United States217 Posts
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kawoq
Guatemala357 Posts
1. getting into Silver 2. Having a boyfriend who is working on a LAN party house (one of the things I want to make in the future) And about your history well you just need to find some girls that likes the things you like... I know is not esasy but you dont really need them, if you have a good time with boys but oh well... | ||
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