There’s a definite fear among progamers and fans alike that when progamers retire, many will be stuck in life due to a lack of practical skills or experience. We spend years sitting behind a computer screen, often heavily isolated from the world. While progamers do fail to develop many skills, the ones required to be a progamer are amplified magnitudes beyond what would be produced in all but the most demanding jobs. While these skills do not produce a tangible product, they instill in each pro-gamer a strength of spirit and mind that is unmatched.
One of the most valuable lessons I was forced to learn early on was the ability to take criticism and keep rolling. While I had many fans, I often felt like I had even more haters as their voice was much louder. When I lost an important series there were always posts about how poorly I played or calls for me to retire. It was disheartening to read, but eventually I realized that that is just reality.
Imagine going into your job, making a mistake and having twenty people tell you that it was time to retire or that you were worthless. Now imagine that this happened frequently. Like it or not, this is your world when your work is seen by so many people. The world of progaming is fast and unforgiving. Little mistakes snowball into big problems and missed opportunities. The only way to keep up is to keep going. To succeed, you can’t afford to let the naysayers bog you down with their hate.
I’ve become tempered to criticism and have learned how to improve without taking it personally. As a game designer, many of the decisions I’ve made have been initially wrong. When testing a new idea, it’s important to to acknowledge that initial imperfections are necessary in order to create something better. Iteration is the key to eventually making something great, which necessarily entails starting with something not so great. When showing a product in development, there will be many bugs and issues. Being a progamer taught me how to take criticism and make myself better for it.
There is no progress without failure. After failure comes inspection and with inspection comes improvement. The very nature of development requires that we delve into the unknown. If we could delve into the unknown without making mistakes, then that ‘unknown’ wasn’t really unknown to begin with. This journey into uncharted territory is not a one step process. You don’t get to discover one new thing and then retreat to the familiar. To stand above and apart from competitors, it is required that you immerse yourself in a world that you know better than anyone else.
Designing something primarily in another’s world means living more in imitation than in innovation. We cannot truly succeed if we only work in the shadow of others. In my best Starcraft moments, I used strategies that started and ended inside my own head. I theorized about different openings and consistently brought unexpected tricks to my games. Although my Starcraft skill faded, my creative spirit has only become more energized with this new world I’ve created in Aeon’s End.
The absolute core of the gameplay in Aeon's End is that of a deck-builder. Those familiar with the genre will find something they recognize here. The rest is an amalgamation of ideas borne from a spirit who embraced failure and the lessons it taught. There were months where the game barely functioned. There was a week where I apologized to every single playtester I subjected my game to because of how incoherent it was. Those lowest lows stemmed from my willingness to test ideas that I barely understood. From those ashes, I built something unique, something entirely my own because I wasn’t afraid to swim in unfamiliar waters. In search of something greater, I refused to retreat to what I already knew. Starcraft taught me that in order to be great, we must lead the charge into the unknown. Starcraft's champions changed the way we understood the game.
Creating something new is a long and involved process. Persistence was critical to coherently wrapping each idea together. When my efficiency dropped, I took a break to recharge but I never gave up. I came back, week after week, constantly refining and improving on my journey to make the best game possible.
My spirit had already been tempered by my time as a pro-gamer. The lows that I felt during my time with Starcraft allowed me to view current problems with an unusual perspective. Nothing in the development process has ever compared to the feeling of stepping off the stage in front of thousands of fans after a loss. The problems that I face now are incredibly minor compared to the heartache I suffered time and time again in pursuit of my pro-gaming dream. In reflection, I see each tournament as a stepping stone. Each event was a test. Rather than wallow in what I was not, I needed to persevere toward what I wanted to be. This is what I do now. Each day, I make a plan that ensures the game I test tomorrow is better than the game I test today. For a long time, I did not know when the game would be done, but I had faith that if I continued long enough I would find the end that is now in sight.
Aeon’s End is a co-op deck building board game. It’s game for a group of friends to come together and immerse themselves in a new world. The end of everything looms tall and near. You are fighting in a world where humanity has been driven underground by the monsters that will never let you live in peace. You must come together and defend the city, Gravehold, and subsequently humanity, from imminent extinction using your wits and skill. Success in Aeon’s End requires teamwork, cooperation and flexibility.
For me, Aeon’s End is so much more. It’s a testament to what a determined individual can do. It’s a testament to why risks are worth taking. Without taking risks, dreams remain nothing more than their name. By pushing past your limits and adventuring into the unknown, dreams can soar. I hope you enjoy playing Aeon’s End as much as I did making it. There were times where I didn’t know if it would be worth it, but now that the project is nearly complete, I know deep down that it was all worth it. Every ounce of flesh and blood that I put into this game was worth it. Finally, I understand that my time spent with Starcraft gave me something special that I could not have received anywhere else.
Unfortunately, strength of spirit is not enough to produce a game. All the art and gameplay are complete, and now all that remains is to find enough people who also believe in my game to make it a reality. My kickstarter is live here. I hope that you can help me finish this last part of the process so that many more can enjoy it.