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Just got in the door.
Stripped down to my boxers.
Feeling sorry for myself, what else is new. But you know what? Fuck you.
I took myself to celebrities tonight. Met up with a friend and some of his acquaintances. I didn't want him to feel obligated to stick with me (for my lack of knowing anyone else), and so i decided to keep some distance; allows him space and also gives me a chance to be brave in the face of opportunity - i might talk to someone!
Not much around. Still havin' a great time. I love to dance. A few prospects, nothing too spectaclar. One guy is nice, not as fit as i like, but not skinny - which is important - and has nice hair (in multiple places). Obviously straight though. He's here to pick up the straight chicks who like to accompany their gay boyfriends. And he succeeded (actually went home with 2 chicks from the looks of it at the end of the night).
Another prospect, good dancer (must be gay). I make my way over pretty slow. I want to be casual about it, but more than that, i'm there to dance and have a good time. So i push slowly over to his area. Moments of being within dance-distance the guy high-tails it off the floor (even tripping on some stairs on the way out.. fuck.. lol).
No worries, still havin’ a great time. He was both older and balding worse than i am.
See another prospect. Super cute guy. A little bit small for my tastes (5'6" 150 lbs?) but cute. We make eye contact a few times. Uncertain of his sexuality. He dances like a straight guy (a shy one at that), but has a cuteness and proud-to-be-cute-ness about him that makes me think he's gay, bi, or straight and curious.
More eye contact is made and i realize that i'm actually pretty interested. I love it when guys dance - especially ones who are confident to do so despite never having been in a dance lesson. haha.
I'm super shy though, and ultimately, i don't want to ruin a straight guy's night makin' him think that he appears gay if i make an advance.
He makes his way over to me quite a few times. Within dancing range he backs off. I'm super confused. He maintains eye contact for a long time, and isn't afraid to smile. He appears to make advances but then backs off. Maybe he's just shy?
I continue to dance, having a great time. This one chick is fucking hot. She knows it too. Her breasts are nearly popping out of her dress. Her heels have more inches on them than my cock. Her legs are smooth, and are obviously well taken care off (in an artificial i-like-to-burn-myself-in-tanning-salons sorta way).
She makes eye contact and then some. She looks me up and down. She checks me out and makes sure that i know that she's checking me out. I don't give her much notice, she's trying far too hard, and is clearly loving the attention way too much.
Cute guy puts on his jacket and seems about to exit. I curse myself for my lack of bravery, accept it and get over it, and get back to dancing fullout.
Cute guy is back, jacket on, dancing near me again. He makes eye contact and makes it closer to my direction.
Long story short (lol), i finally get the balls to ask him if he's queer; turns out he's not. Turns out that he's just back to admire that cunt's legs and 8 inch heels.
and it hits me hard and i'm at this point fed up. They say 3% of the population is gay. Out of this 3%, i have to meet someone who is my type. My type happens to be the kind that you can't really tell they're gay unless they admit to sucking cock. So out of this 3%, they have to be my type, and i also have to happen to chance across a signal to put something into happenings. Add to this that i then must also be their type.
And that fucking bitch leaves the bar with a whole fucking entourage. Fucking 6 guys - none of which are her friends - escort her out of the bar. She laughs with her friend and takes home none of them.
Can't you guys stick to your own fucking bars? Can't chicks keep their boobs to themselves (and their gay boyfriends) when they enter my fucking zone? Could they just make it look not so fucking easy? maybe then i could feel a bit better?
And the worst part is, i felt fucking good tonight. I've lost a shit ton of weight. My arms have gained size, and clearly shows beneath my long-sleeve shirt. My stomach is flat, if not defined. I'm not the best dancer, but i know how to keep a beat and can move my body accordingly. I'm not a model, but i know i'm cute and definitely have my charm.
And not one fucking turnout.
/end emo
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i went to a party last night and like every ho there was unavailable. there's always next time, you're still young!
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Ah, I'm sorry to hear. But at least you're putting yourself out there. I don't imagine your shyness makes it very easy to do so, so more kudos to you for trying.
There's not much to say in a reassurance way; nothing is guaranteed. But, I'm sure you'll bump into a hot, seemingly-straight guy who will brush aside all of the awkward asking bits for you someday.
(It's not my favorite song, but it is a preferred.)
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I expected ninjas (thousands of them)
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Just out of curiosity, you wouldn't be able to achieve an orgasm with a woman at all?
Yeah I imagine it would be kind of hard to find a partner in only 3% of the population but aren't there more people if you count in the ones who are bi as well?
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On February 09 2008 23:31 RavenWrath wrote: I expected ninjas (thousands of them)
WOW SO FUNNY
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Haha, man it must be hard being gay. I take it that outside of gay bars, it's quite hard getting dudes?
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go to guadalajara mexico i think its backwards over there maybe 3% of the population is straight
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Wow, I never realized it was so hard being gay. That 3% thing really narrows down your options.
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thanks for all the condolences! i was drunk and just wanted to rant.
i'll have better luck next time. <3 all
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You know, I would think that perhaps dating websites might really be a good way for you to go. I really dislike club situations, so I usually meet women via school, work, or dating sites. There are some free ones like OKcupid and PlentyofFish, and there are some pay ones like Match.com. Personally, I think the pay ones tend to get better results. But anyway, you might try something like that...
I think sometimes things appear easier for some people than others, and probably it is, but I think to find a really deep fulfilling relationship can be difficult for everyone.
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Valhalla18444 Posts
i hate scummy bitches that go to gay bars and i dont even go to gay bars
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On February 10 2008 06:30 nA.Inky wrote: You know, I would think that perhaps dating websites might really be a good way for you to go. I really dislike club situations, so I usually meet women via school, work, or dating sites. There are some free ones like OKcupid and PlentyofFish, and there are some pay ones like Match.com. Personally, I think the pay ones tend to get better results. But anyway, you might try something like that...
I think sometimes things appear easier for some people than others, and probably it is, but I think to find a really deep fulfilling relationship can be difficult for everyone.
who said anything but a deep fulfilling relationship? lol
I just want to get laid.
if mroe happens after that, then sweet.
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United Arab Emirates5090 Posts
good luck =/ i always imagined being gay or lesbian really difficult
its good that you at least try. best of luck in a world that fears what it does not understand.
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United States41555 Posts
My gay friend constantly rants about how hard it is to find a guy. There again his housemate constantly flirts with him, despite being in a committed straight relationship so it could be worse for you. At least you're not living with a tease.
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Meh, 1 bad day means nothing.
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Mora, are you good at picking out gay dudes in a crowd? Or is trial and error pickin up dudes lo
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exit music is a song from Radiohead -.-
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hawk, i'd like to think i'm good at it.
my closest friends would say im horrible at it. the rest of my friends would say im good at it. most of my acquaintances think i have an omnipotent gaydar.
oddly enough, those who know me least are the most right. :X
edit - i'd like to make a correction*
what i have is really more of a combination of 'gaydar' and a 'would this person have sex with me' radar.
The latter goes off alot more than the former. If it goes off, i know there's a possibility of sleeping with an individual. It may requrie copious amounts of alcohol, or some other set of conditions, but it simply alerts me to the fact if it's possible or not.
My gaydar is decent.
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I was actually planning to go to a gaybar any time soon (with 2 gay guys and 1 girl so far). And somehow I feel bad about it now. Should I still go? kinda curious if I'll enjoy it and how much blokes will try to hit on me
edit: Also talked to this guy who's, as he says: 'mostly gay', which means he hasn't had sex with a girl this century. He also told me that guys are easy, so maybe you got a really high standard and he's a slut, or you're going to the wrong clubs (ofcourse I can't know how many choices you got where you live, or anywhere for that matter)
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