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Active: 2860 users

battle.net 2.0 is a restaurant!

Forum Index > SC2 General
Post a Reply
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Tiazi
Profile Joined February 2010
Netherlands761 Posts
May 30 2010 12:41 GMT
#1
found a lovely metaphore on the blizzard feedback forum I gotta share with you guys.

Say that blizzard is a restaurant, Starcraft 2 is the food they serve and battlenet 2.0 is the waiter that brings you the food.

Now the food is hands down awesome, it's the best thing you've ever ate, in fact it's so good your mouth orgasms when your tongue touches that culinary delight.

How ever the waiter is a dick.

He doesn't allow you to talk to any one else at the table, but you can whisper to some one close to you as long as no one else hears what you're saying (no chat channels).
When you see some friends of yours at the next table he doesn't allow you to get up and go to them unless you order the exact same thing you've ordered at your table once you reach their table (no xrealm)
If you want salt on your food you have to pay extra, if you want pepper you have to pay extra, if you want to use the napkin, you have to pay extra, if you want a tooth pick, you have to pay extra, if you want to go to the bathroom you have to pay extra (map marketplace).
While you order the waiter places a microphone under your table in order to gather personal information about you, information that he will use to make statistics and sell to other restauranats.
Sharing food between you and your loved one is completly forbidden since there have been case where people would eat for free by doing this (no lan)
The plates, knives, forks and the dinner table are filled with adds.
At the end of the lunch you can't see the whole bill, just the first 2 items you've baught and how much the overall price is, but not the price for the individual items (no world wide ranking)

Now would you WANT to go again to the same restaurant? Even if the food is good?

Would you really be surprised if some one would say "let's not go here anymore untill they fire that waiter?"


Discuss!
"A brilliant yet deluded man once said, 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos.' Gumiho is that agent of chaos." -monk
Bananas
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Sweden98 Posts
May 30 2010 12:43 GMT
#2
Haha :D

Spot on!
"terrible terrible damage"
Koffiegast
Profile Joined February 2010
Netherlands346 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-30 12:51:09
May 30 2010 12:44 GMT
#3
While you order the waiter places a microphone under your table in order to gather personal information about you, information that he will use to make statistics and sell to other restauranats.

= privacy

Also an addition:
If you tell other people your name, and the waiter doesn't like it, he tells you to change your name or kicks you out of the restaurant. Even when your surname means "General" in some language. (naming policies)
The waiter also knows some languages and has a sharp ear, waiting for you to say some words and when you say them he will shriek out some nonsense, making it impossible for the ones you're talking to understand what youre saying. Unfortunately the waiter is so incompetent, that even when you use daily used / normal words he will shout out nonsense (the word "hier" in Dutch means 'here', yet it gets blocked). ("coarse" language filter)
Wut
Liquid`Nazgul
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
22427 Posts
May 30 2010 12:45 GMT
#4
love it
Administrator
NuKedUFirst
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada3139 Posts
May 30 2010 12:46 GMT
#5
LOL, spot on!
FrostedMiniWeet wrote: I like winning because it validates all the bloody time I waste playing SC2.
Nich
Profile Joined April 2010
397 Posts
May 30 2010 12:47 GMT
#6
i don't think i will come back after they finish giving their free food, unless something happen
Hirmu
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Finland850 Posts
May 30 2010 12:47 GMT
#7
wow epic and genius!
milly9
Profile Joined May 2007
Canada325 Posts
May 30 2010 12:47 GMT
#8
I'd probably tell the manager the food was great and I'd never eat here again because of the waiter.
then i stick my treasures in a treehole
Mista_Masta
Profile Joined January 2009
Netherlands557 Posts
May 30 2010 12:48 GMT
#9
LOL! So true =)
virusak
Profile Joined December 2009
Czech Republic344 Posts
May 30 2010 12:48 GMT
#10
what a nice comparison
Smu
Profile Joined July 2009
Serbia164 Posts
May 30 2010 12:48 GMT
#11
Cute.

Most of the associations are quite clever, except for the "you can't see the whole bill = no world ranking" one. Doesn't make much sense.

But yeah, the overall "product is good but you are treated like an idiot" picture is a good relation.
Take us into orbit Mr. Malmsteen. We've seen enough.
tnud
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Sweden2233 Posts
May 30 2010 12:51 GMT
#12
lol'd.
Good read :D
- ಠ_ಠ - | disinfect wrote: AHAHHAHAHA 2DG FUCK ME ALREADY.
DemiSe
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
883 Posts
May 30 2010 12:51 GMT
#13
So ture. Nice comparison, Fire that waiter and bring back to old one!
Let's See Who's Stronger, Your Tricks, Or My Skills.
ZenDeX
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
Philippines2916 Posts
May 30 2010 12:52 GMT
#14
Title is wrong!

Blizzard = Restaurant
B.net 2 = Waiter
CCGaunt
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States417 Posts
May 30 2010 12:55 GMT
#15
Mmm delicious threads
I approve heartily

this waiter probably adds the tip to the bill without asking either
Take me to Korea
Tiazi
Profile Joined February 2010
Netherlands761 Posts
May 30 2010 12:55 GMT
#16
On May 30 2010 21:52 lolaloc wrote:
Title is wrong!

Blizzard = Restaurant
B.net 2 = Waiter


whatever -_-
"A brilliant yet deluded man once said, 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos.' Gumiho is that agent of chaos." -monk
teapot
Profile Joined October 2007
United Kingdom266 Posts
May 30 2010 12:57 GMT
#17
And you remember what a nice guy the old waiter was who served you last time you were at the restaurant. I miss him. ='(
Oddysay
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Canada597 Posts
May 30 2010 12:57 GMT
#18
pretty good
aseq
Profile Joined January 2003
Netherlands4002 Posts
May 30 2010 13:06 GMT
#19
On May 30 2010 21:57 teapot wrote:
And you remember what a nice guy the old waiter was who served you last time you were at the restaurant. I miss him. ='(

Yup, even though he was getting old and it was showing on him, he still knew really well what the customers wanted
Tiazi
Profile Joined February 2010
Netherlands761 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-30 13:16:46
May 30 2010 13:06 GMT
#20
double post oops
"A brilliant yet deluded man once said, 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos.' Gumiho is that agent of chaos." -monk
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