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I don't hold any respect for suiciders.
You know, I pity you because by your own admission you are basically dead inside.
No one deserves the treatment she had to endure. Everyone has a breaking point. Those people did everything in their power to push her over the edge and they succeeded. To life is our strongest instinct and they killed that. Saying that you don't respect people committing suicide is basically saying you have no respect for people. Because contrary to public opinion we are not in control of everything and we are not responsible for everything that happens to us. Sometimes we face more than we can endure. To pretend this is not the case is lying to yourself.
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On October 14 2012 00:03 Doppelganger wrote:You know, I pity you because by your own admission you are basically dead inside. No one deserves the treatment she had to endure. Everyone has a breaking point. Those people did everything in their power to push her over the edge and they succeeded. To life is our strongest instinct and they killed that. Saying that you don't respect people committing suicide is basically saying you have no respect for people. Because contrary to public opinion we are not in control of everything and we are not responsible for everything that happens to us. Sometimes we face more than we can endure. To pretend this is not the case is lying to yourself.
^^well written
I really do hate some of the elitist bullshit I come across sometimes in TL and irl.
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On October 14 2012 00:03 Doppelganger wrote:You know, I pity you because by your own admission you are basically dead inside. No one deserves the treatment she had to endure. Everyone has a breaking point. Those people did everything in their power to push her over the edge and they succeeded. To life is our strongest instinct and they killed that. Saying that you don't respect people committing suicide is basically saying you have no respect for people. Because contrary to public opinion we are not in control of everything and we are not responsible for everything that happens to us. Sometimes we face more than we can endure. To pretend this is not the case is lying to yourself.
Whilst death is always a sad thing, a lot of it was because of what she did to herself. I'm sorry, people go through far worse things every day. She had a nice life handed to her. She looked good, doesn't seem like she grew up in a poor family/country etc. The things she did to herself is her mistake - and hers alone.
She was an idiot and while that doesn't justify death, there are worse things happening every single minute we live.
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One of the Top 10 worst TL threads I've read all year.
Though I'm probably bias because I had someone close to me (sister) take her own life. Though not for reasons of being bullied.
Most of you don't understand what happened, and never will.
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I really don't understand people that feel so sorry for her. There's so much shit going on in the world to feel sorry about yet some random teenager that commits suicide seems to create an outrage of compassion bigger than real tragedies often involving many lives.
And since I'm on it i can't understand most of the actions this girl did. The story just seems like some made up bullshit. She lost all her friends because of a photo of boobs? Really? I'm pretty sure if a photo of my dick got public on the internet I wouldn't lose all my friends if any. Except I assume her boobs were actually nice to look at, so what's the problem? And if she really was so sensitive etc. why no one had helped her: parents, teachers, psychologist? Everyone hated her because of the boobs? Also you don't have to have a facebook account.
Seriously the whole global mourning after her saddens me more then this whole story.
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On October 13 2012 10:54 KwarK wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 10:41 sunprince wrote:On October 13 2012 10:27 TwoToneTerran wrote:
This is one of the most depressing threads I've ever seen on TL. Not just for this awful story, but for all the disgusting opinions that have spilled out because of it. It boggles my mind how people are fucking blaming the victim. It's the same sickening mentality that allows stupid shit like "She was asking for it by wearing those clothes" or "he was begging to get shot" or whatever. No, showing your chest on the internet is not grounds for public shaming, extortion, stalking, and beatings. It's not grounds for it, but it can lead to it. Just like taking a stroll through gang territory at 2 am isn't grounds for being assaulted, but can lead to it. We teach children to be wary of strangers because we somehow expect children to play a part in keeping themselves safe from pedophiles. No one screams that PSA ads on stranger danger equate to blaming children for their own victimization. No one claims that a kid who ignored the advice and got molested as a result will blame himself whenever he hears someone say, "Don't take candy from strangers," so we should never, ever say that stuff to any children, ever. Yet when it comes to telling women that exercising restraint in the expression of their sexuality will help minimize their risk of sexual assault/harassment, this is treated as blaming victims for their victimization, and telling women they were asking for it. The truth is, women should be able to dress however they want, and they can dress however they want--but when they do, it's only wise to minimize their other risk factors to compensate. In other words, if you're going to behave in ways that attract a lot of sexual attention from a lot of men, you should not make yourself vulnerable or an easy target. If you're going to behave in ways that make you vulnerable, you should not dress in ways that will attract the sexual attention of every man at the bar. On October 13 2012 10:27 TwoToneTerran wrote:
Anyone who says this is in any way her fault (even if she did do something stupid, it's something of ill consequence unless a sick piece of shit does their best to ruin her life for it) needs to reevaluate their mindset, because it's a depraved, almost sociopathic one. No, it's not. The depraved mindset is that of white knights who think it's okay to discourage others from taking responsibility for their own behavior, and in doing so encourage others to put themselves in danger. On October 13 2012 10:27 TwoToneTerran wrote:
The gross inflation of member count has really brought the scum out of the woodwork. Yeah, I hate irresponsible white knight scum that thinks they're better than people who do understand personal responsibility. You don't have a personal responsibility to not do things you want to do that don't harm anyone else just because other people have the potential to be assholes. It's simpler not to do things where the risk of other people being an asshole is high or the damage an asshole can do is extensive but that doesn't mean you're obligated to make that sacrifice, nor that you deserve the consequences if you don't.
Personal responsibility means acting in a responsible manner, which most people would define as including taking appropriate safety precautions.
Nowhere did I suggest that you deserve the consequences of risky behavior. What I'm pointing out is that it's stupid to deny that those risks exist, or to encourage others to engage in risky behavior.
On October 13 2012 10:54 KwarK wrote:
I would not advocate a child taking sweets from a stranger because of the asshole risk but that means that the child has been forced to make a sacrifice because the world is a shitty place. Refusing to live in fear or believing that other people are better than they are do not make you deserving of exploitation.
Again, I never brought up anything about "deserving". Don't strawman my argument into victim blaming. Walking down gangland streets at 2 am doesn't make you deserving of assault, but it sure is a bad idea. Acknowledging it's foolishness and the safety risks of that act is not victim blaming, it's promoting responsible behavior.
On October 13 2012 10:54 KwarK wrote:
As for the brief attack on female empowerment you felt obligated to throw in there, the reason women need to oppose the whole "you deserved to be raped for leaving the kitchen" thing while we still teach kids to not take sweets from strangers is because we don't live in a world where the defence lawyer for a child molester stands up in court and says "men and women of the jury, how can you believe that the accused kidnapped this child when he was out there in the street taking sweets from any old stranger".
It's not an attack on female empowerment, quite the opposite. The biggest obstacle to female empowerment is the tendency of society to infantilize women. Refusing to even advocate, let alone ask or expect, responsible behavior from women is treating them as less than children.
Your characterization of rape trials is ludicrous and betrays a complete lack of familiarity with rape cases and/or the consumption of feminist propaganda. Here in the real world, sexual behavior is an issue because rape trials hinge upon consent, which is often difficult to improve. It's not a matter of victim blaming, it's a critical matter of establishing whether or not consent was given.
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Everyone who is saying she brought this on herself and deserves the blame should be permabanned. Dredges of society.
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On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 10:41 sunprince wrote:
We teach children to be wary of strangers because we somehow expect children to play a part in keeping themselves safe from pedophiles. No one screams that PSA ads on stranger danger equate to blaming children for their own victimization. No one claims that a kid who ignored the advice and got molested as a result will blame himself whenever he hears someone say, "Don't take candy from strangers," so we should never, ever say that stuff to any children, ever. Ok, so now, when a child who has been told not to take candy from strangers takes candy from strangers and dies by poisoning, you want the dead child to take responsibility for its actions? That it deserves any of the blame for the wrongdoing of others? Of course it's wise to advise caution, it's not a grounds for blaming the victim for the acts of the cruel.
No one is saying she deserved what happened. The point being made is that attracting sexual attention + disclosing personal information is a bad idea.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 10:41 sunprince wrote:
Yet when it comes to telling women that exercising restraint in the expression of their sexuality will help minimize their risk of sexual assault/harassment, this is treated as blaming them, and telling women they were asking for it. Oh my sweet lord. You are literally championing victim blaming and the repression of women.
White knights like you repress women by reducing them to helpless objects with no agency or influence over their fates. A true egalitarian treats women like adults. We have no problem with telling men that refraining from insulting others will reduce their risk of violent assault, and this isn't treated as blaming them. Why do you think we should treat women as less capable than men?
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 10:41 sunprince wrote:
The truth is, women should be able to dress however they want, and they can dress however they want--but when they do, it's only wise to minimize their other risk factors to compensate. In other words, if you're going to behave in ways that attract a lot of sexual attention from a lot of men (flashing people online), you should not make yourself vulnerable or an easy target (giving away your personal info). Conversely, you're going to behave in ways that make you vulnerable, you shouldn't behave in ways that attract everyone's attention, because a single bad person could target you. Look at you, right here, contradicting yourself. The cognitive dissonance is amazing. "Women should be able to dress however they want" which I also take as women should be able to express themselves as they see fit (so long as it doesn't harm others, golden rule), and you instantly turn around and say don't make yourself vulnerable because there are bad people and you should live in fear.
Your reading comprehension is terrible. Women should be able to express their sexuality however they want, the same way that men should be able to walk around gangland while wearing flashy jewelry. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to do so without taking proper precautions.
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On October 14 2012 00:22 TwoToneTerran wrote:
Everyone who is saying she brought this on herself and deserves the blame should be permabanned. Dredges of society.
And where exactly did I say that, pray tell?
You must be terrified of discussing the actual points, if you're reduced to lying and calling for censoring.
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On October 14 2012 00:11 noddy wrote:Show nested quote +On October 14 2012 00:03 Doppelganger wrote: I don't hold any respect for suiciders. You know, I pity you because by your own admission you are basically dead inside. No one deserves the treatment she had to endure. Everyone has a breaking point. Those people did everything in their power to push her over the edge and they succeeded. To life is our strongest instinct and they killed that. Saying that you don't respect people committing suicide is basically saying you have no respect for people. Because contrary to public opinion we are not in control of everything and we are not responsible for everything that happens to us. Sometimes we face more than we can endure. To pretend this is not the case is lying to yourself. Whilst death is always a sad thing, a lot of it was because of what she did to herself. I'm sorry, people go through far worse things every day. She had a nice life handed to her. She looked good, doesn't seem like she grew up in a poor family/country etc. The things she did to herself is her mistake - and hers alone. She was an idiot and while that doesn't justify death, there are worse things happening every single minute we live.
It is true that from an objective viewpoint worse things happen. But guess what: it was her life. You can say: bad things happen all the time and they are worse. But she had to endure it. And subjective suffering is not comparable to anything that happens somewhere far away. Suffering is relative.
She let him have her picture cause she trusted him. Then he blackmailed her, spread the photos after she didn't comply. She changed school two times and wherever she went she was bullied for this, she was beaten up for this. Her parents knew it and tried to help her. She was suffering from depression taking antidepressants. Those people founded a RIP Facebook page for her before she even died. This mistake defined the entire end of her life. This was her very personal Hell that she could not escape from it. And here is the simple truth: the behavior of the bullies isn't justifiable and this is their responsibility. They created this hell. In the beginning this was her mistake but she can not be responsible for what people made out of that.
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On October 13 2012 11:59 Defacer wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 10:41 sunprince wrote:
Yeah, I hate irresponsible white knight scum that thinks they're better than people who do understand personal responsibility. One Word: THIRTEEN. [Defacer drops mic. Internet applauds.]
Congratulations, you completely missed the context. This was referring to TwoToneTerran's characterization of advocating safety as "victim blaming".
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On October 14 2012 00:22 TwoToneTerran wrote:
Everyone who is saying she brought this on herself and deserves the blame should be permabanned. Dredges of society. They are just ignorant, and/or not wise enough yet. Most will be. Some may be bullies themselves, and can't accept that their actions can lead to this.
I used to be ignorant after my brother died of medicine overdose, and was working as a database constructor for a place where people had tried to commit suicide. Even though I was forbidden to talk to them, I, one day told them that suicide was a selfish act. Overall slightly different, but still unempathetic and ignorant, because I was still grieving my loss, but also because I felt that there were other ways, not understanding.
Suicide is a cry out for help, while feeling no one listens or cares enough, and the pain doesn't feel like it is stopping.
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I feel this is getting too much attention, more than it deserves. Don't get me wrong it's sad she killed herself, it's sad her life was cut short over bullshit like this.
I just have a lot of issues surrounding this specific incident. She could have avoided a lot of this, first of all by not showing her breasts to random people online. We can only assume she did it often. The media had the audacity to say "She was lured into showing her breasts to an unknown male." I'm sorry but you don't "lured" into that. That would be like me stabbing someone and then telling the police the victim lured me into stabbing them. She should have had better security settings on Facebook. She shouldn't have done whatever she did with this other guy who had a girlfriend. She moved and things caught up with her again, there is just no excuse for that happening without it being her own fault. She actively searched out drugs and alcohol. That just doesn't fall into your lap, especially when you're 15. She said she was "alone", she wasn't. No one is ever alone, they just deluded themselves into believing that.
Growing up I can say I was a bully and I've been bullied. I've seen people get it way worse than this girl (Now I know feelings are subjective and it doesn't matter if it's worse in an objective sense, because situations can always be the "worst" for the specific victim). I actually know a kid who killed himself in grade 5 due to bullying. Did it really receive much attention? No. Many people have killed themselves over bullying and cyber-bullying but it hasn't received as much attention. I don't know why, but I can only speculate because she's a moderately attractive young girl from middle/upper-suburbia. Also this is being picked up by all the "Trend-whores" of the internet. This just reminds me of Kony 2012 all over again. No one will care in 2-3 months, even though this is just a pessimistic outlook I suppose I can say that I do hope something will change to a degree.
I apologize if this sounds cold or uncaring.
Now with that being said, I hope the police are trying to catch this unknown male. Sending out nude photos of a 15 year old girl falls under a lot of cyber-crimes and you can do heavy time for that.
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On October 14 2012 00:27 sunprince wrote:
No one is saying she deserved what happened. The point being made is that attracting sexual attention + disclosing personal information is a bad idea.
Firstly, lots of people are saying she deserved what happened. I mean, they're literally saying "This is 100% her fault, she brought it on herself." And you yourself are applying the same mentality of abusing the term "personal responsibility" to somehow mitigate the trauma she experienced.
And yes, it's a bad idea. But it shouldn't be and no one should be blamed for when others take it too far and hurt them for it.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:
White knights like you repress women by reducing them to helpless objects with no agency or influence over their fates. A true egalitarian treats women like adults. We have no problem with telling men that refraining from insulting others will reduce their risk of violent assault, and this isn't treated as blaming them. Why do you think we should treat women as less capable than men?
Was JFK a white knight? Acknowledging and pointing out the societal inequalities doesn't make you a whiteknight. You have a twisted view of criminal responsibility. Women get mistreated sexually more than men, by men, and their sexuality is treated as taboo by EVERYONE, including other women.
TREATS WOMEN LIKE ADULTS? SHE WAS FIFTEEN. I don't treat any 15 year olds like adults. I don't force any level of personal responsibility for being stupid and horny and making a minor mistake on adolescents, especially girls who are much more prone to this kind of slut shaming. It's not sexist to understand and point out the sexism in the world. That's like calling me a racist for pointing out that black people are unfairly tried in the court of law relative to white people.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:
Your reading comprehension is terrible. Women should be able to express their sexuality however they want, the same way that men should be able to walk around gangland while wearing flashy jewelry. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to do so without taking proper precautions.
Yeah, but then you said she should be afraid of bad people. Like, the one bad person on the internet who tracked her down and extorted her for sex and then leaked her mistake to a bunch of fucked up youths who lack any form of compassion. You don't blame the bad person for being bad, you blame the victim for doing something to make herself feel better at the cost of harming no one. You have your priorities on wrong if you look at this story and don't put all of the blame on the extortioners.
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I'm done with this thread. Legitimately too sickened to continue. TL used to be better.
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RIP Amanda. I wish she had a better support system and surrounded herself around a better crowd. Suicide is never the answer.
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On October 14 2012 00:38 Krohm wrote:
I feel this is getting too much attention, more than it deserves. Don't get me wrong it's sad she killed herself, it's sad her life was cut short over bullshit like this.
I just have a lot of issues surrounding this specific incident. She could have avoided a lot of this, first of all by not showing her breasts to random people online. We can only assume she did it often. The media had the audacity to say "She was lured into showing her breasts to an unknown male." I'm sorry but you don't "lured" into that. That would be like me stabbing someone and then telling the police the victim lured me into stabbing them. She should have had better security settings on Facebook. She shouldn't have done whatever she did with this other guy who had a girlfriend. She moved and things caught up with her again, there is just no excuse for that happening without it being her own fault. She actively searched out drugs and alcohol. That just doesn't fall into your lap, especially when you're 15. She said she was "alone", she wasn't. No one is ever alone, they just deluded themselves into believing that.
Growing up I can say I was a bully and I've been bullied. I've seen people get it way worse than this girl (Now I know feelings are subjective and it doesn't matter if it's worse in an objective sense, because situations can always be the "worst" for the specific victim). I actually know a kid who killed himself in grade 5 due to bullying. Did it really receive much attention? No. Many people have killed themselves over bullying and cyber-bullying but it hasn't received as much attention. I don't know why, but I can only speculate because she's a moderately attractive young girl from middle/upper-suburbia. Also this is being picked up by all the "Trend-whores" of the internet. This just reminds me of Kony 2012 all over again. No one will care in 2-3 months, even though this is just a pessimistic outlook I suppose I can say that I do hope something will change to a degree.
I apologize if this sounds cold or uncaring.
Now with that being said, I hope the police are trying to catch this unknown male. Sending out nude photos of a 15 year old girl falls under a lot of cyber-crimes and you can do heavy time for that. You seem to have all the data, and yet you are throwing half of it out of the window, when trying to make a conclusion.
Yes, you can get lured, when you want to be accepted, and feel like no one loves you. Everyone wants to be loved. Sometimes you place trust in people to be sincere, because you want to believe they are. When you have placed that trust, then you are willing to do things that you normally wouldn't.
Yes, you are right, they are mostly deluding themselves into feeling alone, that doesn't make the feeling any different. If you feel no one loves you, then that emotions seem as real, as if it was. If you feel alone, then that emotion is as real, as if you were.
You recognize that feelings are subjective, and yet you do not understand the implications of that. Even if you are the most spoiled brat in the world, if you feel at pain, then you are. When you are, few go around with the mantra - they have it so much worse in NorthKorea, or Africa or whatever, because your pain still feel real. And all people want to feel love. Those who are spoiled are used to love in abundance, and getting faced with the opposite will feel like excruciating pain. Imagine this: Someone tells you, you are their moon, star, and shining moment - putting you on a pedestal, and then that pedestal is suddenly removed, and that person no longer feels this way - all you were told, feels like lies, and the depths you can fall into can be very lasting. In the other end, if hardship feels like your daily dose since birth, then you are more tough skinned, because you expect nothing else.
This girl trusted people, and was exploited for her inexperience and being gullible. When you place trust in some, in a desperate attempt to be accepted and feeling loved, and you get treated like dirt, then the effect can be devastating.
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On October 14 2012 00:39 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 14 2012 00:27 sunprince wrote:
No one is saying she deserved what happened. The point being made is that attracting sexual attention + disclosing personal information is a bad idea. Firstly, lots of people are saying she deserved what happened. I mean, they're literally saying "This is 100% her fault, she brought it on herself." And you yourself are applying the same mentality of abusing the term "personal responsibility" to somehow mitigate the trauma she experienced.
Noting that she was irresponsible does not mitigate her trauma. It merely points out a mistake that others would do well to avoid.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 14 2012 00:27 sunprince wrote:
White knights like you repress women by reducing them to helpless objects with no agency or influence over their fates. A true egalitarian treats women like adults. We have no problem with telling men that refraining from insulting others will reduce their risk of violent assault, and this isn't treated as blaming them. Why do you think we should treat women as less capable than men? Was JFK a white knight? Acknowledging and pointing out the societal inequalities doesn't make you a whiteknight. You have a twisted view of criminal responsibility -- it's apparent here that you are also misogynistic because you view a woman showing her tits as worse than a male doing it.
At no point have I stated anything to suggest that flashing tits is a "bad" thing, merely that it attracts attention, and pairing that attention with giving out personal information is risky behavior. I'm actually quite supportive of nudity of all sorts, but I acknowledge the reality that it can be risky behavior in certain situations.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Women get mistreated sexually more than men, by men, and their sexuality is treated as taboo by EVERYONE, including other women.
[Citation needed]. Men are sexually assaulted nearly as often as women in the general population, and more overall when you add in prison rape. In the first world, female sexuality is pretty much only considered taboo by religious and social conservatives today, whereas male sexuality is still pretty damn taboo in general (it's just called creep shaming instead of slut shaming when directed at men).
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:
TREATS WOMEN LIKE ADULTS? SHE WAS FIFTEEN. I don't treat any 15 year olds like adults. I don't force any level of personal responsibility for being stupid and horny and making a minor mistake on adolescents, especially girls who are much more prone to this kind of slut shaming. It's not sexist to understand and point out the sexism in the world. That's like calling me a racist for pointing out that black people are unfairly tried in the court of law relative to white people.
I'm referring to your general stance on victim blaming, not the particular subject of the OP. It's sexist when your understanding of sexism boils down to "protect the helpless women", instead of understanding how the infantilization of women is crucial to holding them back. The egalitarian thing to do is to treat women the way you treat men, like adults with agency.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:Show nested quote +On October 14 2012 00:27 sunprince wrote:
Your reading comprehension is terrible. Women should be able to express their sexuality however they want, the same way that men should be able to walk around gangland while wearing flashy jewelry. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to do so without taking proper precautions. Yeah, but then you said she should be afraid of bad people. Like, the one bad person on the internet who tracked her down and extorted her for sex and then leaked her mistake to a bunch of fucked up youths who lack any form of compassion.
Everyone should be afraid of bad people. It's a bad idea to attract attention while vulnerable, regardless of your gender. You have a right to act irresponsibly, but it's important that we don't pretend that it's a good idea. That doesn't imply living in fear, no more than telling children not to take candy from strangers or telling men not to hang out in gang territory implies encouraging them to live in fear.
On October 13 2012 11:23 TwoToneTerran wrote:
You don't blame the bad person for being bad, you blame the victim for doing something to make herself feel better at the cost of harming no one. You have your priorities on wrong if you look at this story and don't put all of the blame on the extortioners.
Wrong. You can blame the bad person for being bad, but ultimately you can only control your own behavior. It would be nice if the world was a nice place where a woman could walk down the street nude at night without being sexually assaulted, but in the real world you must accept that there are potentially bad people out there and protecting yourself is a good idea. I put all of the blame on the bullies, but I'm insisting that her behavior was foolish.
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I'm a guy and I'll admit I cried thinking about this. It's heartbreaking for myself and so many others to hear because, even if you don't know the girl, if you've ever felt depressed but you're still here, then you know just how destroyed and lonely she must have felt just before she did it.
It's one of those things that when you read, you just wish so much that you could have been there... that you could have said or done anything for her...
If you let anything good come of this, next time you see someone being bullied, remember Amanda and don't hesitate for a second to help them, no matter what the risk is, it can't be worse than this.
The poor kid must have had so much love that she couldn't express or share, and now she'll never be able to grow or blossom that into something truly inspiring. Also, I can't help but feel a little blame for the pharmecutical companies and their fucking depression medication lobbying. Those drugs make you feel NUMBED emotionally, and that includes the positive energy it sometimes takes to get through this. If anti-anxiety drugs away your own anxiety of death, then suddenly suicide seems so much more viable.
But I'm no expert and that's just my own opinion. I have a lot of respect for Liquid'Nony and I believe he's speaked highly of his own anti-depressive medication in the past so I could indeed be very wrong.
Either way, this is something that should be sorrowful for all of us.
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On October 14 2012 00:39 TwoToneTerran wrote:
TREATS WOMEN LIKE ADULTS? SHE WAS FIFTEEN. I don't treat any 15 year olds like adults. I don't force any level of personal responsibility for being stupid and horny and making a minor mistake on adolescents, especially girls who are much more prone to this kind of slut shaming. It's not sexist to understand and point out the sexism in the world. That's like calling me a racist for pointing out that black people are unfairly tried in the court of law relative to white people.
It is a debatable position, as to how much personal responsibility should be expected of young teenagers with regard to this issue. But they obviously should take some personal responsibility for *some* things, because that's the natural way for kids to become fully responsible adults. They don't take on responsibilities all at once, but learn things gradually. Its just like how we expect kids not to walk into traffic without looking both ways, or that they understand not to get into a van with a stranger (can't think of another good example right now). Parents can't hold the hand of their kids all the time, especially not when they're teens, so there has to be some level of intelligence on the teen's part to do the right thing.
I think we should definitely be lenient and acknowledge that a girl this young can make a mistake and not be fully aware of the consequences. But speaking how how they *should* be treated...15 year old girls have brains, they can figure things out...and that's often the age when they start experimenting with a lot of things they're technically not supposed to be doing. I feel like as long as they've been properly informed (just like with the D.A.R.E. program in school to inform kids about drugs), they should have the common sense necessary to take more responsibility for the things they post online.
Really there is no alternative. You're not going to stop bullying completely unless you have a very costly, invasive system that monitors interactions between teenagers. Maybe for now kids are unaware of these things (I'm not entirely sure how true that is across the board)...but at least for the future, I think kids need to be made aware either by their parents or the school and then take personal responsibility.
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EPT
