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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On September 08 2016 18:58 LemOn wrote:Show nested quote +On September 07 2016 10:54 Ben... wrote: Not sure what to do. I've gone on 3 dates with a girl, and it's clear she's way into me, but I am starting to think I don't actually like her. Our last date felt like more of an obligation than anything to me, and I didn't really enjoy it at all. It's just kinda tough to decide on whether I should just cut it off or not because our previous date was really good. We work nearly opposite schedules so she texts me a lot and I would kinda rather she didn't. I really do think that is partly what has made me not so sure about her. It's like she needs attention non-stop, and it sometimes feels like she doesn't respect that I sometimes just don't want to talk, especially with someone I'm not in a relationship with. I don't want to spend each day giving her a play-by-play of what I'm doing.
I guess part of it is that she's becoming kinda negative about everything (except me) and I've been working very hard to not be negative anymore.
I haven't looked at Tinder in like a month and the other day I randomly got a match on it with a girl I specifically remember thinking was super cute when I last did a swiping session. Maybe that's a sign... Eh How can she force you to text with her though? Seems to be your responsibility, just stick to setting up dates over the phone/facebook for a while and nothing more and see what happens. Yeah that's more or less what I've done the last few days. I haven't heard from her in 2 days, which is fine with me and rather freeing feeling. I'm done with this one.
I'm gonna take a break from this stuff for a few weeks because I have other stuff going on right now. It'll be back at it soon enough.
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On September 11 2016 09:28 Uldridge wrote:But are you a psychopath?  Also: hugging in Belgium is not something we do to greet someone. I'm not sure about the rest of Europe, but I think it's the same. It's a very USA thing (Canada too?) to do. If we greet someone it's either a hand or a peck on the cheek. Only a little bit , hehe nah I'm alright. Depends I guess. If I had never met the person before and it wasn't a date I would just shake their hand. Would be kind of awkward to go for a hand shake with a girl you talked to for a week in my opinion.
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Last time I visited this thread was chasing a girl that played with me.
Now I am visiting it and am currently in a 1.5 year long relationship thats going well. Beautiful and intelligent girl. Not looking forward to the discussion about what happens to us when we go to university but thats a distraction from the fact that we are both in a great relationship.
It is funny looking back and feeling so awful about someone who did not care about me. I am really lucky.
Things change. Don't give up!
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On September 11 2016 18:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On September 11 2016 09:28 Uldridge wrote:But are you a psychopath?  Also: hugging in Belgium is not something we do to greet someone. I'm not sure about the rest of Europe, but I think it's the same. It's a very USA thing (Canada too?) to do. If we greet someone it's either a hand or a peck on the cheek. Only a little bit  , hehe nah I'm alright. Depends I guess. If I had never met the person before and it wasn't a date I would just shake their hand. Would be kind of awkward to go for a hand shake with a girl you talked to for a week in my opinion. you should try living in an asian country. all we do is wave and say hi if you try to hug someone or give them a kiss on the cheek when youre just platonic with them theyll take it weird and think youre trying to dry hump them or make a move lol
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On September 12 2016 16:04 evilfatsh1t wrote:Show nested quote +On September 11 2016 18:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:On September 11 2016 09:28 Uldridge wrote:But are you a psychopath?  Also: hugging in Belgium is not something we do to greet someone. I'm not sure about the rest of Europe, but I think it's the same. It's a very USA thing (Canada too?) to do. If we greet someone it's either a hand or a peck on the cheek. Only a little bit  , hehe nah I'm alright. Depends I guess. If I had never met the person before and it wasn't a date I would just shake their hand. Would be kind of awkward to go for a hand shake with a girl you talked to for a week in my opinion. you should try living in an asian country. all we do is wave and say hi if you try to hug someone or give them a kiss on the cheek when youre just platonic with them theyll take it weird and think youre trying to dry hump them or make a move lol
In Australia too? Just wondering cause it doesn't agree with the image of Australians I have in my head 
In Belgium it's a kiss on the cheek for girls (even if you've never met them before), and a handshake for guys. Though some guys kiss as well, which I personally find a bit odd but w/e.
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On September 12 2016 16:04 evilfatsh1t wrote: you should try living in an asian country. all we do is wave and say hi if you try to hug someone or give them a kiss on the cheek when youre just platonic with them theyll take it weird and think youre trying to dry hump them or make a move lol Well then again most Asian people I see are super awkward. Just waving feels so strange. I just shook hands with my first tinder date and god that felt so wrong. I learned quickly though!
Kissing someone who isn't your girlfriend is pretty weird here as well.
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On September 12 2016 16:48 Laurens wrote:Show nested quote +On September 12 2016 16:04 evilfatsh1t wrote:On September 11 2016 18:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:On September 11 2016 09:28 Uldridge wrote:But are you a psychopath?  Also: hugging in Belgium is not something we do to greet someone. I'm not sure about the rest of Europe, but I think it's the same. It's a very USA thing (Canada too?) to do. If we greet someone it's either a hand or a peck on the cheek. Only a little bit  , hehe nah I'm alright. Depends I guess. If I had never met the person before and it wasn't a date I would just shake their hand. Would be kind of awkward to go for a hand shake with a girl you talked to for a week in my opinion. you should try living in an asian country. all we do is wave and say hi if you try to hug someone or give them a kiss on the cheek when youre just platonic with them theyll take it weird and think youre trying to dry hump them or make a move lol In Australia too? Just wondering cause it doesn't agree with the image of Australians I have in my head  In Belgium it's a kiss on the cheek for girls (even if you've never met them before), and a handshake for guys. Though some guys kiss as well, which I personally find a bit odd but w/e. lot of kisses ... 3 for women and yeah its normal cheek kiss with men ,i usually avoid it.
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On September 12 2016 16:48 Laurens wrote:Show nested quote +On September 12 2016 16:04 evilfatsh1t wrote:On September 11 2016 18:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:On September 11 2016 09:28 Uldridge wrote:But are you a psychopath?  Also: hugging in Belgium is not something we do to greet someone. I'm not sure about the rest of Europe, but I think it's the same. It's a very USA thing (Canada too?) to do. If we greet someone it's either a hand or a peck on the cheek. Only a little bit  , hehe nah I'm alright. Depends I guess. If I had never met the person before and it wasn't a date I would just shake their hand. Would be kind of awkward to go for a hand shake with a girl you talked to for a week in my opinion. you should try living in an asian country. all we do is wave and say hi if you try to hug someone or give them a kiss on the cheek when youre just platonic with them theyll take it weird and think youre trying to dry hump them or make a move lol In Australia too? Just wondering cause it doesn't agree with the image of Australians I have in my head  In Belgium it's a kiss on the cheek for girls (even if you've never met them before), and a handshake for guys. Though some guys kiss as well, which I personally find a bit odd but w/e. australians are ok with pecks on cheeks, hugs etc. i live in australia but im of korean descent so i was talking more specifically about east asian countries.
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Ugh.
Asked her when she was available. She told me she would check her schedule tomorrow because she was so tired and was going to bed. That was 48 hours ago.
Not sure why one would bother adding your date on facebook if you're not interested in another date. I'll give it a few more days, then I'll just send her a message that I'd like to meet her again and she knows where to contact me and remove her as friend.
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On September 14 2016 05:26 bloodwhore~ wrote: Ugh.
Asked her when she was available. She told me she would check her schedule tomorrow because she was so tired and was going to bed. That was 48 hours ago.
Not sure why one would bother adding your date on facebook if you're not interested in another date. I'll give it a few more days, then I'll just send her a message that I'd like to meet her again and she knows where to contact me and remove her as friend. Yeah a girl did that to me too. She added me on Facebook and then fb messaged me her number and then proceeded to not really talk to me again outside of saying hello once (to which I replied and never heard from her again). I found it quite odd to say the least.
flaky people are annoying.
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On September 14 2016 07:36 Ben... wrote: Yeah a girl did that to me too. She added me on Facebook and then fb messaged me her number and then proceeded to not really talk to me again outside of saying hello once (to which I replied and never heard from her again). I found it quite odd to say the least. flaky people are annoying. Yeah. I'm mostly confused. I mean she added me on facebook just as she got home. I should maybe check my facebook so I haven't posted any fucked up shit back in the days.
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On September 14 2016 05:26 bloodwhore~ wrote: Ugh.
Asked her when she was available. She told me she would check her schedule tomorrow because she was so tired and was going to bed. That was 48 hours ago.
Not sure why one would bother adding your date on facebook if you're not interested in another date. I'll give it a few more days, then I'll just send her a message that I'd like to meet her again and she knows where to contact me and remove her as friend. if youre gonna tell her youd like to see her again why would you remove her as a friend? thats just passive aggressive and she definitely wont be contacting you then also, there are a lot of people who whore friends on facebook for various reasons (mostly self-esteem boosts). becoming friends on facebook doesnt mean anything so dont look so far into it
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Eh. Yeah i'm not sure i would remove her. But i also feel like i dont really give a shit what she would think if i did it.
Also. She sent me a movie of some people basejumping from some building. Just responded with "we could do that if you pay . Have you had time to check your schedule?" I dont think there is att point of going with a cute and kind message. She is playing some games.
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I just saw a small infographic about sexual activity, putting the average amount of sexual partners for men at around 8 and any number above 10 as being "too promiscuous". Most of the guys I know were at 15 partners or up at their mid twenties. As such this info seems kinda false to me. What do you guys think?
BTW the info was from US and Europe.
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On September 15 2016 00:49 B.I.G. wrote: I just saw a small infographic about sexual activity, putting the average amount of sexual partners for men at around 8 and any number above 10 as being "too promiscuous". Most of the guys I know were at 15 partners or up at their mid twenties. As such this info seems kinda false to me. What do you guys think?
BTW the info was from US and Europe. I think the takeaway from that would be the notion that men like to inflate their numbers
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On September 15 2016 00:55 farvacola wrote:Show nested quote +On September 15 2016 00:49 B.I.G. wrote: I just saw a small infographic about sexual activity, putting the average amount of sexual partners for men at around 8 and any number above 10 as being "too promiscuous". Most of the guys I know were at 15 partners or up at their mid twenties. As such this info seems kinda false to me. What do you guys think?
BTW the info was from US and Europe. I think the takeaway from that would be the notion that men like to inflate their numbers  I'm pretty confident that even without inflation they all still pass 15 though.
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Of the 30 or so guys I've known well enough to comment on their sexual history, I'd guess that around 5-10 members of that group are at 15 or higher. Naturally, my dorky high school honors class friends are lower, and my drug addled undergrad friends are a bit higher. Accordingly, nothing about that figure strikes me as all that unusual.
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I don't necessarily think B.I.G.s friends lie.
However, a nerd who has never had sex often has nerd friends who has never had sex. A guy who fuck a lot probably has other friends that fucks a lot.
And if BIG is in the latter group, this explains why his small sample size severely distorts his view.
These questions pop up on Jodel (basically yik yak) and looking from the answers there, most people have fairly low numbers, and a select few have very high numbers.
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It would be interesting to see research like this targeted at people aged 20-35 because I think at least in western europe the numbers would be waaaay higher..
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