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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
Kleinmuuhg
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Vanuatu4091 Posts
February 05 2016 23:01 GMT
#15901
On February 06 2016 05:58 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Honestly no, but based on the number of holes that women have vs. the number of dicks that men have, it sounds like orgies would be far better for women than men.

agreed lets just keep our intercourse bijective
This is our town, scrub
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46246 Posts
February 05 2016 23:20 GMT
#15902
On February 06 2016 08:01 Kleinmuuhg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 06 2016 05:58 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Honestly no, but based on the number of holes that women have vs. the number of dicks that men have, it sounds like orgies would be far better for women than men.

agreed lets just keep our intercourse bijective


I love it when you talk mathy to me.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Kleinmuuhg
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Vanuatu4091 Posts
February 05 2016 23:37 GMT
#15903
On February 06 2016 08:20 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 06 2016 08:01 Kleinmuuhg wrote:
On February 06 2016 05:58 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Honestly no, but based on the number of holes that women have vs. the number of dicks that men have, it sounds like orgies would be far better for women than men.

agreed lets just keep our intercourse bijective


I love it when you talk mathy to me.

is that a bananach in your tightening pants or are you just happy to see me?
This is our town, scrub
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
February 06 2016 00:00 GMT
#15904
On February 05 2016 13:51 XenOmega wrote:
This year, I've started using some "website/apps" more seriously and already met 2 girls (The first one, didn't really work out, which is fine).

Today, I've met a nice girl. I think it went well ; we share enough interests. However, since I have not much experience in relationship, I cannot tell if she shares the same feelings. So I asked her on Facebook if she wanted to meet again (to watch the Revenant, we mentionned about our interest to see that movie). She didn't say no, she didn't say yes : she wants to focus on her schoolwork first.


Translation
"No"

Next time assume she'll say yes and say "Hey girl's I'm taking you to see that Revenant movie, hope you are ready for some hardcore bear on man action! Which day works best for you next week?

The joke should be in line with your mutual humor
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
February 06 2016 00:02 GMT
#15905
On February 05 2016 16:24 FiWiFaKi wrote:
Hey guys, do any of you have any experience finding a 3rd or 4th person for some less than vanilla type encounters? My lady and I have been together for three years, and I think we're reaching that point where though I might feel reluctant to share my precious, I don't have to worry whether I'll still be loved if she's stuffed by someone else.

Our University was doing "sex week", and we attended this seminar (it was actually abouts kinks), and I think it helped open up the conversation about this kind of stuff between one another.

Weve never done "hardcore" things as defined by the online community, but we do things like anal, very light bondage, spanking, and rough sex all-around, and are very open minded about this kind of stuff. I've always known my girlfriend liked stuff like ogres and threesomes... And hey, it might be fun, seeing her get plowed and destroyed like that, as well as opening the doors for things like a two girl threesome. Though maybe we would be more comfortable going the swinger route and finding a couple, that way, everyone's mentality in the act is quite similar, and potential nervousness and fears will be mutual.

Anyway, just seeing if anyone has any experience going about these things. Any guidance and advice to keep it fun, discrete, and safe would be appreciated. (disclaimer: I know these types of things aren't for everyone, and I'm not looking for advice of not doing it because it's dangerous for the relationship).

There should be Swingers communities in most larger cities - seems like a good reasonably safe environment to start at
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
February 06 2016 09:38 GMT
#15906
Went on a date yesterday after a week or two of being tired of dating.

I've dated a pretty diverse number, some study to be doctors, teachers etc. This one is studying economics, I've had some ideas how those girls are and fuck me, they were true, at least with this girl. She is so fucking normal. She really feels like a "basic bitch" but without the bitch. I shouldn't judge too much though, only met her once. Just some first impressions.

Will most likely see her again though, doubtful if this will be heading towards the relationship area though.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46246 Posts
February 06 2016 14:05 GMT
#15907
What do you mean by "She is so fucking normal"? Do you mean she's boring? Predictable? You don't think she'll spice up your life or make it interesting?

(I know plenty of guys and girls who with they could find someone "normal" haha.)
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
February 06 2016 15:14 GMT
#15908
On February 06 2016 23:05 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
What do you mean by "She is so fucking normal"? Do you mean she's boring? Predictable? You don't think she'll spice up your life or make it interesting?

(I know plenty of guys and girls who with they could find someone "normal" haha.)


Both predictable and boring, at least at first glance. Maybe she will, but so far it doesn't seem like our interests really match. She studies, she has a horse, she wants to travel more and she has friends. That seems to be it. Doesn't seem to be much that differentiates her from the other 3 billion females on this earth.

You don't need to get carried away though, we have only met once, the post was just a first impression, and you guys know I speak my mind .

Other "normal" people would probably like her, "normal" probably wasn't the best word to describe her. I think I have spent to much time on /r9k/.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46246 Posts
February 06 2016 15:15 GMT
#15909
Haha fair enough good luck
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Luepert
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States1934 Posts
February 06 2016 17:10 GMT
#15910
Bloodwhore what is there about you that is so much more interesting than her? Girl studying economics and having a horse is somewhat interesting.
esports
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32157 Posts
February 06 2016 17:32 GMT
#15911
yeah I was just gonna say that. has unique hobby, studying something that will actually get her a job, and wants to expose herself to new places. on the surface that's probably more intresting than most people and you're only one date in.

i'm usually more interested in determining if someone sucks on a first date. lots of awesome people just have cold feet and don't show their personality more til date 2. usually by then if you don't feel some kind of spark there's a reason
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
February 06 2016 18:37 GMT
#15912
Horse riding I think is the third most common sport in Sweden (at least for females), the only thing I find interesting about horses is that they are tasty . Travelling is extremely common here as well, especially among students who study at university, she even said something along the lines of "I'm thinking about taking a year to go to Asia like everyone else". I'm not really the travelling type even though I have travelled a bit. And honestly, I think you're kinda stupid not to study if you live in Sweden since you basically get paid to do it.

It's not that I think I'm more interesting than her, the problem is that I find it harder to find some common ground, harder to find subjects that both enjoy talking about etc. I agree that you don't necessarily have to have everything in common to date someone, just feels easier.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32157 Posts
February 06 2016 19:56 GMT
#15913
even if not super unique, has her own interests and wants to travel/be more worldly/open minded are pretty hard to spin as any thing other than good or at the very worst neutral?

you just seem to be waiting for some kind of movie kind of connection on the first date! be a tad more patient maybe and try waiting til the 2nd or 3rd?

what are your interests and what are you looking for
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
February 06 2016 22:10 GMT
#15914
On February 07 2016 04:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
even if not super unique, has her own interests and wants to travel/be more worldly/open minded are pretty hard to spin as any thing other than good or at the very worst neutral?

you just seem to be waiting for some kind of movie kind of connection on the first date! be a tad more patient maybe and try waiting til the 2nd or 3rd?

what are your interests and what are you looking for

Well I have said it 2 times already, this was just my first impression. I'm not as worked up about is as you guys
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-02-06 22:29:05
February 06 2016 22:25 GMT
#15915
It's a first date dude

Only thing you should be focused on what's her passions, craziest things she's done, memories etc. and other fun trait revealing questions that bring emotional impact into the date, there's always common ground in that and reveals if you're compatible (and adds to the spark tremendously) or incompatible real fast!


Specifics on hobbies etc... not that important imo as long as the other person's passionate about them and it wouldn't interfere with possible logistics of seeing each other and values.
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
Kleinmuuhg
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Vanuatu4091 Posts
February 06 2016 23:02 GMT
#15916
you will only get him to stop posting if you depict every single sentence of him like that. listen to him when he says he was just sharing first impressions lol
This is our town, scrub
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-02-06 23:13:41
February 06 2016 23:12 GMT
#15917
I was referring to the part with finding common ground, she doesn't have to have hobbies you're into and it should be still easy to find common ground in a conversation, especially on the first date where most of the stuff should be about traits, fun stories and personality and less about factual stuff - that's what job interviews are for.
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
February 07 2016 01:11 GMT
#15918
I agree with bloodwhore. Bougie chicks who ride horses are typically not very interesting.

But I don't think a very large percentage of the 3.5 billion women on the planet own a horse.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
ticklishmusic
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States15977 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-02-07 01:12:07
February 07 2016 01:11 GMT
#15919
On February 07 2016 08:12 LemOn wrote:
I was referring to the part with finding common ground, she doesn't have to have hobbies you're into and it should be still easy to find common ground in a conversation, especially on the first date where most of the stuff should be about traits, fun stories and personality and less about factual stuff - that's what job interviews are for.


and considering the two ppl barely know anything about each other, there should be interesting and fun things to talk about. unless you've lived under a rock for the last x years there's something you can talk about.

actually living under a rock for the last x years sounds pretty unique and interesting
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
February 07 2016 01:16 GMT
#15920
On February 05 2016 16:24 FiWiFaKi wrote:
I've always known my girlfriend liked stuff like ogres and threesomes... And hey, it might be fun, seeing her get plowed and destroyed like that, as well as opening the doors for things like a two girl threesome.

I'm not one to pick out typos, but this one is just incredible. This needs to be in a quote box somewhere.

User was warned for too many mimes.
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