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On October 11 2015 08:54 APurpleCow wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2015 01:43 bloodwhore~ wrote:On October 11 2015 00:04 APurpleCow wrote:
First date was dinner+ice cream for dessert, then to the arcade to play games (had my arm around her and her snuggling into me!), and finally walking her home holding hands.
Today we're going to a corn maze! Probably watch a movie after that, or get dinner (or both). Going to try to get her to come back to my place for the movie haha Holding hands on the first date? + Show Spoiler +I guess you've talked to her a lot before, otherwise you guys are moving pretty fast! Good luck! It went really well! We hadn't talked a lot before (we'd only met twice before the first date), but I guess I don't know what the normal timeline for this is so I just went for it haha I had my arm around her the whole corn maze and played with her hair, touched her neck, etc. Setting up a third date for next weekend 
Congrats buddy! anything other than arm around happen? did you try to go for a kiss or how did things go down?
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Nah, I tried to kiss her even though I was terrified because I know I must be terrible at it, but she said no. I think she's probably also nervous about it for the same reason--she said she almost always just turns guys down when they ask her on a date.
Still, should be able to get her to my place next time!
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Well if she's turning down a kiss and very nervous, then it doesn't seem too likely you'll get her back to your house. I wouldn't get your hopes up! I'm sure you'll find something else fun to do though.
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On October 11 2015 09:30 WarSame wrote:
Well if she's turning down a kiss and very nervous, then it doesn't seem too likely you'll get her back to your house. I wouldn't get your hopes up! I'm sure you'll find something else fun to do though.
Strange how females will let you touch all over them and hold hands etc and then turn you down to kiss
but yeah wouldnt get your hopes up on that either
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On October 11 2015 09:37 arb wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2015 09:30 WarSame wrote:
Well if she's turning down a kiss and very nervous, then it doesn't seem too likely you'll get her back to your house. I wouldn't get your hopes up! I'm sure you'll find something else fun to do though. Strange how females will let you touch all over them and hold hands etc and then turn you down to kiss but yeah wouldnt get your hopes up on that either
Yeah I think the hand holding and touching are seen as more informal and casual flirtatious actions, but the first kiss is seen as a serious, defining moment.
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On October 11 2015 09:24 APurpleCow wrote:
Nah, I tried to kiss her even though I was terrified because I know I must be terrible at it, but she said no. I think she's probably also nervous about it for the same reason--she said she almost always just turns guys down when they ask her on a date.
Still, should be able to get her to my place next time!
Make sure you're patient with her No need to rush, nor are you required to get her back to your place.
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I've noticed that myself. Grinding, or any other funny stuff doesn't have nearly the same emotional impact on me that a kiss does. I wonder why.
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Come on guys women putting more importance into sex amd other intimate stuff than men is like dating 101...
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She told me "maybe next week" for the third time, I told her to fuck off. I feel like I'm having more fun with rejection than with actual dating.
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Nah, I tried to kiss her even though I was terrified because I know I must be terrible at it, but she said no. I think she's probably also nervous about it for the same reason--she said she almost always just turns guys down when they ask her on a date.
No worries. Super strange that she will hold your hand but won't kiss you though in my eyes. Holding hands is so much more intimate than just a quick peck on the lips. Sure making out while cuddling might be a different story but...
On October 11 2015 15:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
She told me "maybe next week" for the third time, I told her to fuck off. I feel like I'm having more fun with rejection than with actual dating.
I feel like I have missed something, but you did well if she has said it three times.
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On October 11 2015 09:24 APurpleCow wrote:
Nah, I tried to kiss her even though I was terrified because I know I must be terrible at it, but she said no. I think she's probably also nervous about it for the same reason--she said she almost always just turns guys down when they ask her on a date.
Still, should be able to get her to my place next time!
Yeah that's fine, just keep going for it, never ask by the way - a girl should never say no, but usually push you away, give you the cheek.... The key here is to learn how to read her body language, and then confidently go for it like it's not a big deal, even if it's a quick peck on the lips. And then you learn fun ways to turn it around when you get rejected.
But being nervous is normal it'll get easier with other girls.
With regards to touching this will sound counter intuitive. But with a girl like that, especially when you have been intimate but she has restrains, learn to make a move then pull back, give her space and let her come to you. I.E. Next time you hold her hand, hold it for several minutes so she gets comfortable. And then pull away. Completely. No touching, no hand holding, even walk a bit further away from her - the key here is to give her space and watch her reactions, even if it takes half an hour - you don't make a move and wait for her to take initiative. With experience you will learn when she's ready for the next step, and often times she'll just go and start grabbing your hand herself when you pull away. What you do here is hold her hand, and take it a step further again - maybe pull her towards you while holding her hand and give her a quick peck on the lips...Dating coaches call this Two steps forward, one step back. And it works universally I'd say all the way to sex. So later when all you've done is make out, you make out, pull away completely and when she comes to you you make out again but this time grab her ass while doing it or put a hand under her shirt... If she's not ready you again pull away completely, wait for her to come to you.
This applies to all girls by the way, even long term girlfriends, most guys just move really fast don't give them space to go to them at their own pace. I.E. after I boldly went for hand holding, first kiss, phase 2,3 at the start of a relationship and she's comfortable with them. I stop initiating them completely, let her come to me. i.e. with the girl I'm dating now and it's been over half a year it sometimes takes several hours before we hold hands or kiss on a date, sometimes it takes 5 minutes - it's all up to her.
Also, I wouldn't recommend taking a girl to your place either before you kissed - I know many guys would disagree, but I've learned to condition girls to know that when they come to mine, some form of physical sex will happen and you're not there yet I'd say, I'd recommend it after you full on make out on a date at least with a girl like this.
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On October 11 2015 15:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
She told me "maybe next week" for the third time, I told her to fuck off. I feel like I'm having more fun with rejection than with actual dating.
After the second time you just go ahead and say
"cool, I'd love to see you so give me a call once you know when you're free"
And you cease all contact
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On October 11 2015 18:36 LemOn wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2015 15:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
She told me "maybe next week" for the third time, I told her to fuck off. I feel like I'm having more fun with rejection than with actual dating. After the second time you just go ahead and say "cool, I'd love to see you so give me a call once you know when you're free" And you cease all contact
Yeah basically put the ball in her court, after she makes a few excuses when you repeatedly try to reach out to her, regardless of expectations that she'll actually get in touch with you, and then move on. Sometimes that makes them legitimately miss you, but even if she never calls, you haven't formally burned a bridge* and you're free to explore elsewhere.
* Don't ever burn bridges if possible! There's a good chance that one day, your future girl might know a guy who knew a girl who slept with the cousin of a girl who takes selfies with your ex-date. And they're either going to pass on the information that you were nice/ sweet/ a good guy and things just never worked out between you and her... or they're going to spend an eternity ripping you to shreds about how much of an asshole you were. Calling her out on her flakiness might make you feel good short-term, but it doesn't really help you much in the long run, and it could end up screwing you over in the future.
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Yeah that's fine, just keep going for it, never ask by the way - a girl should never say no, but usually push you away, give you the cheek.... The key here is to learn how to read her body language, and then confidently go for it like it's not a big deal, even if it's a quick peck on the lips. And then you learn fun ways to turn it around when you get rejected.
But being nervous is normal it'll get easier with other girls.
That's something I learned on my first real first date before I met this girl. Though she gave me a kiss on the cheek, she rejected my attempt to kiss her afterwards, and I messed the whole thing up by making too big of a deal trying to ask her what was wrong. I did much better this time.
On October 11 2015 11:29 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2015 09:24 APurpleCow wrote:
Nah, I tried to kiss her even though I was terrified because I know I must be terrible at it, but she said no. I think she's probably also nervous about it for the same reason--she said she almost always just turns guys down when they ask her on a date.
Still, should be able to get her to my place next time! Make sure you're patient with her No need to rush, nor are you required to get her back to your place.
Oh, of course! I'm interested in more than her body, and I completely understand if she's not comfortable enough with me yet. I even joked around with her a little bit about this.
With regards to touching this will sound counter intuitive. But with a girl like that, especially when you have been intimate but she has restrains, learn to make a move then pull back, give her space and let her come to you. I.E. Next time you hold her hand, hold it for several minutes so she gets comfortable. And then pull away. Completely. No touching, no hand holding, even walk a bit further away from her - the key here is to give her space and watch her reactions, even if it takes half an hour - you don't make a move and wait for her to take initiative. With experience you will learn when she's ready for the next step, and often times she'll just go and start grabbing your hand herself when you pull away. What you do here is hold her hand, and take it a step further again - maybe pull her towards you while holding her hand and give her a quick peck on the lips...Dating coaches call this Two steps forward, one step back. And it works universally I'd say all the way to sex. So later when all you've done is make out, you make out, pull away completely and when she comes to you you make out again but this time grab her ass while doing it or put a hand under her shirt... If she's not ready you again pull away completely, wait for her to come to you.
Sounds good! This happened a little bit on our date (she wanted to go see something so she turned around and grabbed my hand), but it is something I can try to do more.
I've learned so much about girls in the last year...they're so much more complicated than guys when it comes to this kind of thing, it seems like it's very important to make them feel a certain way: comfortable, excited, and desired..I've gotten a lot better at it very quickly, and I think I'm actually already better than most of the guys I know (to be fair, they're mostly engineers), but there's still so much to learn.
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On October 11 2015 19:15 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2015 18:36 LemOn wrote:On October 11 2015 15:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
She told me "maybe next week" for the third time, I told her to fuck off. I feel like I'm having more fun with rejection than with actual dating. After the second time you just go ahead and say "cool, I'd love to see you so give me a call once you know when you're free" And you cease all contact Yeah basically put the ball in her court, after she makes a few excuses when you repeatedly try to reach out to her, regardless of expectations that she'll actually get in touch with you, and then move on. Sometimes that makes them legitimately miss you, but even if she never calls, you haven't formally burned a bridge* and you're free to explore elsewhere. * Don't ever burn bridges if possible! There's a good chance that one day, your future girl might know a guy who knew a girl who slept with the cousin of a girl who takes selfies with your ex-date. And they're either going to pass on the information that you were nice/ sweet/ a good guy and things just never worked out between you and her... or they're going to spend an eternity ripping you to shreds about how much of an asshole you were. Calling her out on her flakiness might make you feel good short-term, but it doesn't really help you much in the long run, and it could end up screwing you over in the future.
I go through girls pretty quickly, maybe I just need to date a few to offset that information real quick :p
On a more serious note though, it's not like I gave her a lot of ammunition for the "he's an asshole" tirade... I mean, first 2ish went great, then I got impatient and stopped. And on the other hand, if there was something about me that made her flake, she'd just rip me to shreds on that.
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"I could easily hook you up on a date with at least 4 of my coworkers." - last girl
Might take her up on her proposition someday...
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On October 12 2015 01:49 bloodwhore~ wrote:
"I could easily hook you up on a date with at least 4 of my coworkers." - last girl
Might take her up on her proposition someday...
Whenever I hear that promise from a girl, I wonder how much of it is because "omg I think you and my friend have so much in common and would have such great chemistry together" and how much of it is "ffs Brittney okay okay I'll find you some random guy who's not a mouth-breather... just stop threatening to slit your wrists!" 
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On October 12 2015 04:34 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Whenever I hear that promise from a girl, I wonder how much of it is because "omg I think you and my friend have so much in common and would have such great chemistry together" and how much of it is "ffs Brittney okay okay I'll find you some random guy who's not a mouth-breather... just stop threatening to slit your wrists!"
HAHAHA wow that last one was harsh! Neither of those scenarios sound great to me. I don't think she thinks we would make a good match just because we have a lot in common as I'm fairly certain we don't. The impression I have of her is that she wouldn't just throw any guy to her friends and she seems to think I'm a great guy and that's the reason for saying these kinds of things. But sure, you never know they might have threatened to commit sushi. Having said that, I'm not sure I'm that big of a fan of the getting set up either, feels like there would be a lot of pressure.
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Mexico2170 Posts
So I met a girl, we hung out once and two days later, this girl says to me in whatsapp something like:
Tuesday:
Girl:Hey! lets go out this thursday
Me:Sure, What do you want to do? 
*Seen, No answer*
This saturday in the night she finally answers with "hi [Phantom]!" and in my mind I'm like "....really?" So I was kind of mad for that and also busy, so I don't answer and leave it in seen. Today I say hi to her and...she leaves me in seen rofl.
Well, that died pretty quickly before it even started!
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On October 12 2015 13:48 [Phantom] wrote:So I met a girl, we hung out once and two days later, this girl says to me in whatsapp something like: Tuesday: Girl:Hey! lets go out this thursday Me:Sure, What do you want to do? *Seen, No answer* This saturday in the night she finally answers with "hi [Phantom]!" and in my mind I'm like "....really?" So I was kind of mad for that and also busy, so I don't answer and leave it in seen. Today I say hi to her and...she leaves me in seen rofl. Well, that died pretty quickly before it even started!
shoulda gave her a suggestion instead of just leaving it open for her to decide
imo
you guys ever just wish you could go back and un-do a relationship completely?
like lately ive noticed all the girls ive been talking to have the same thing in common, that being they all resemble my ex which is kind of starting to trip me out and i dont like it
unsure of how to break this rut, it bothers me that someone who once told me they'd spend the rest of their life with me is so happy with someone else after such a short period of time
like
wtf.
life sure is grand
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EPT![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/lsivzPZ.jpg)
