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On October 05 2015 04:00 ROOTFayth wrote:
would be such a massive overreaction to completely shut you off from her life because of this that if this somehow happened she probably wouldn't be worth the trouble it feels
I don't think that's how it would be interpreted at all. I think it would be a very simple "I don't know this guy yet and he just said something that's a red light/ turn-off for me, so I'm going to err on the side of caution and not bother with a follow-up date." Or even if she gives you another chance, it's already seen as a strike against you. It's not like you two know each other. Remember, bloodwhore didn't even know how to pronounce the girl's name, yet LemOn was telling him to fuck her and tell her about how he jizzed in his pants because she was so hot. This is a brand new person, so this is her second impression of him.
I think that there are some things that are generally not appropriate to tell to a new date (on a first/ second/ third date), as you're still trying to convey a favorable impression and image and not explicitly scare her away. Obviously, as you become more comfortable with her over time (especially if you start a relationship with her), you may choose to be very open with her because you trust her and she trusts you, and you know how she'll react. On the other hand, LemOn is more of a yolo/ hold nothing back ever kind of guy, and maybe that works for him.
I'm curious what the divide is on this subject though, so here's a poll about what to say to a brand new stranger on a first date:
Poll: Are there some things you shouldn't say on a first/ second date?Yes (19) 95% No (1) 5% 20 total votes Your vote: Are there some things you shouldn't say on a first/ second date? (Vote): Yes
(Vote): No
I was going to add longer explanations to the Yes or No options, but I didn't want to misrepresent LemOn's position by making it more specific, and of course, TLers can always read additional contexts from our earlier posts.
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well I haven't dated in a while since I'm married now but I know that when I first started dating I was a bit more afraid of making moves or I was careful with what I said and the results weren't amazing, it became much better when I went back to my usual brutally honest with everyone attitude with girls
so yeah it worked for me too, of course if you're not comfortable with this or not used to it you probably shouldn't do this as it might come out in an awkward way
I think the only thing we should not talk about on a 1st date is anything that's too serious, talking about a wet dream is pretty freaking casual and not a big deal to me. I can't even see how a girl wouldn't feel somewhat flattered unless she's really not interested in you at all to begin with :/
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Well for me that comes off naturally, on 1st dates I usually feel like having fun, staying in the moment, hearing stories from her childhood, her passions etc.
But I guess if someone actually feels like talking about abortions, feminism, politics and the role of Islam on 1st dates with attractive women they took out for the first time, they should do it regardless, and find a girl that digs that 
And repel shitloads of women in the meantime, and that's okay if partner for life is your goal.
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I feel like some people here don't know the difference between being "brutally honest" and being inapropriate/their actions being out of place.
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how would you know if you haven't tested it... there are lines you should not cross, this is definitely not one of them
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On October 05 2015 05:21 ROOTFayth wrote:
how would you know if you haven't tested it... there are lines you should not cross, this is definitely not one of them
I suppose you could ask a huge number of people their reaction to hearing it:
1. My date saying that would be received positively
2. My date saying that would have no major effect either positively or negatively
3. My date saying that would be received negatively
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On September 21 2015 07:56 IgnE wrote:
I don't recall seeing that in the story. What was wrong with the model-gorgeous law-studying girl who was texting you for days after you two fucked?
Update:
texted that girl back. I said "Will you marry me?". (we hadn't really talked in about 3 months.)
That got us talking and now she invited me to chill next week.
I know she doesn't love me but I don't mind sticking around lol
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DarkPlasmaBall: tell her about how he jizzed in his pants because she was so hot.
My actual reaction to reading this.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/X5OZhDn.jpg)
ps. it's milk
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On October 05 2015 05:29 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On October 05 2015 05:21 ROOTFayth wrote:
how would you know if you haven't tested it... there are lines you should not cross, this is definitely not one of them I suppose you could ask a huge number of people their reaction to hearing it: 1. My date saying that would be received positively 2. My date saying that would have no major effect either positively or negatively 3. My date saying that would be received negatively
Don't know about you, but I'd love it if a girl I'm attracted to told me that she had a sexual wet dream after a date with me.
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On October 05 2015 06:14 LemOn wrote:
Don't know about you, but I'd love it if a girl I'm attracted to told me that she had a sexual wet dream after a date with me.
Well my wet dream wasn't because of her, and then I would need to explain that I haven't fapped for 50 days, then I would need to explain nofap, then I need to explain that I was somewhat addicted to porn. Now she has gone home.
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I mean the way these things usually happen is you make a statement like that, girl is surprised, then bursts out laughing.
And if she wants to know more, she asks you questions, if not, you keep the conversation as usual. I tell girls about noporn proudly, if it somehow came up I'm pretty sure it happened on a second date a couple times.
With my current girl on like the 5th date I think when I admitted I didn't want her to look into my recycle bin on desktop as there was porn in it? Pretty sure you commented on that post - and even though next week in bed when she brought up "this isn't porn" when I did certain stuff she actually took it really positively and told me that no guy would admit that and that she was positively surprised.
EDIT: are you sure the 2 weren't related btw? I.E. when I'm around women the "milk" production increases significantly (haven't watched porn in 5+months) ;p
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On October 05 2015 06:15 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On October 05 2015 06:14 LemOn wrote:
Don't know about you, but I'd love it if a girl I'm attracted to told me that she had a sexual wet dream after a date with me. Well my wet dream wasn't because of her, and then I would need to explain that I haven't fapped for 50 days, then I would need to explain nofap, then I need to explain that I was somewhat addicted to porn. Now she has gone home.
lol and the dream wasn't even about her 
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On October 04 2015 07:16 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On October 04 2015 07:10 Chocolate wrote:
I don't think I'm jealous so much, I mostly worry about her getting EXTREMELY drunk (rarely happens with her but she doesn't weigh very much so if she drank more punch than she realized it could happen) and either thinking someone else is me or getting taken advantage of.
Generally her friends are good about sticking together throughout the night but not always.
It also doesn't happen often anyway because we do usually go out together, but occasionally she'll want to go out on days I can't. Yeah, that's pretty much exactly where the trust needs to begin. You can't be around her all the time, and she needs to be responsible and independent too. Just gotta deal with it!
Exactly. It's sucky on her end because what it boils down to is that you don't trust her, even though you acknowledge that she's a generally responsible person. On your end, to truly believe that stuff you'd have to not trust her, and it's tiring being that crazy jealous person who feels like they have to police their gf or they'll cheat.
If liquor didn't exist, people would still cheat. The people who cheat drunk still want to cheat sober. It's a matter of people wanting to cheat and there's nothing you can do to stop it, not that liquor causes those problems.
re: wet dream, I am definitely a fan of be yourself as early as possible, but that is weird as fuck. Jesus.
Yeah, you come off as really honest. There are lots of ways to do this without announcing that you the sexual prowess and tact of a 13 year old, or that you're a porn addict who is doing something as absurd as no fap.
c
it blows my mind that i have to type this, but telling a girl that you had a wet dream because she slept in your bed and you're no fapping because you're a porn addict is not going to produce a lot of positive results
a generally safe way to determine whether or not your hairbrained ideas are good: assume your sister was telling you about a new guy she met. She says I slept over a guy's house and he told me he has wet dreams about me and he no faps because he's addicting to porn.
Would anyone here give their thumbs up to that ??
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On October 05 2015 10:15 QuanticHawk wrote:
a generally safe way to determine whether or not your hairbrained ideas are good: assume your sister was telling you about a new guy she met. She says I slept over a guy's house and he told me he has wet dreams about me and he no faps because he's addicting to porn.
Would anyone here give their thumbs up to that ??
Yeah I think this is a good way of seeing it. In that case I would probably say that wet dreams can happen when not fapping but why the fuck would he tell you that he got one on your second date?
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Telling someone you got a wet dream on the first date or second date is kinda fucked up. Sure, some girls may like that, but most wouldn't, and those that don't like it would dislike it more than those that like it do like it. I don't understand why some of you think telling the girl you had a wet dream would be a good idea. Even if we would be appreciative of a girl telling us the equivalent, that doesn't mean the inverse is true. It's like guys sending dick pics - they would love to see the chick nude, so clearly she would love a dick pic, right? It's the Golden Rule!
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I had two dinner dates with a woman who I'm not sure I was particularly attracted to physically but was definitely conventionally beautiful, smart, and had a cool job. All signs pointed to her being more interested in me than I was in her. I asked her about a 3rd date she said naw.
da fuq. Oh well I wasn't that into her I guess.
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On October 06 2015 10:03 Bigtony wrote:
I had two dinner dates with a woman who I'm not sure I was particularly attracted to physically but was definitely conventionally beautiful, smart, and had a cool job. All signs pointed to her being more interested in me than I was in her. I asked her about a 3rd date she said naw.
da fuq. Oh well I wasn't that into her I guess.
You need to do things that lead to intimacy. Chit-chatting for 3 dates is cringe worthy.
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da fuq. Oh well I wasn't that into her I guess.
Did she say why? Nothing to worry about still..
You need to do things that lead to intimacy. Chit-chatting for 3 dates is cringe worthy.
Well just talking for two dates then inviting her over for netflix and chill wouldn't be that weird. Depending where you go on your first two dates you might not have great opportunities for intimacy. Not everyone have a need to go physical fast either. Probably should have gone for a kiss at least at the end of the second date though if he did think she was beautiful.
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I've started looking for potential girls to approach at university. Saw one today that I thought I'd approach, but with my superior facebook stalking skills I found out that she was already in a relationship.
I'm debating if I should get tinder again. Although I want to approach girls in real, it's hard to find a good opportunity and a girl that I actually want to date. Tinder makes it really easy to start a conversation and get dates.
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On October 07 2015 02:55 bloodwhore~ wrote:
I've started looking for potential girls to approach at university. Saw one today that I thought I'd approach, but with my superior facebook stalking skills I found out that she was already in a relationship.
I'm debating if I should get tinder again. Although I want to approach girls in real, it's hard to find a good opportunity and a girl that I actually want to date. Tinder makes it really easy to start a conversation and get dates.
What about classmates at university? If you're taking the same class, you may already have at least one thing in common, you can casually ask to study and chill, etc.
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EPT
