Dating: How's your luck? - Page 682
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
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WonnaPlay
Netherlands912 Posts
On August 17 2015 23:01 marvellosity wrote: haha I always feel like this when i read this thread. everything always seems so complex when it's really all so simple. I'm with my girl now almost a year after "dating"(after first few dates, we wouldn't come out of the house) for 6 months first. I'm 26 now and have had numerous relationships which were hard as fuck. (even had a long relationship with a girl who was heavily borderliner.. Which is truly emotionally and physically breaking..) With this girl however, everything is just great, have always been great and seem to be going in a great direction. and the most important part ; it's easy .We're just so in sync with eachother it's unbelievable. She doesn't care if I play 10 hours of sc2/HotS straight sometimes, she doesn't judge when I need to smoke a joint after a long workday to get relaxed. Hell, she even learned to roll them for me, so on occasion I come home and she will surprise me. The "sweet" things you do for your girl, it comes automatically when you meet a great girl. you want to do things for her, as she will do things for you. Even if you come into a "fight", it isn't so bad if you just respect eachother and try to understand eachother. I don't think I've ever really had a big argument with her and don't really see it coming in the near future. TLDR; It's not always that bad. Just find the right girl for you. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On August 18 2015 08:25 killa_robot wrote: With all this talk about "dating, but not exclusive", I think they're talking more about having fun than having relationships. I hold the opinion that dating someone by default means the two of you are exclusive. If you're not exclusive, you're not actually dating. For me going on multiple dates with a person = dating. There's no one big rule. There are quite a few poly amorous folk where you have serious long term relationships with multiple people (all with consent) Some people would go on one date and if they agree to another one they wouldn't see anyone else inbetween. Whatever floats your boat really | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On August 18 2015 18:30 WonnaPlay wrote: I'm with my girl now almost a year after "dating"(after first few dates, we wouldn't come out of the house) for 6 months first. I'm 26 now and have had numerous relationships which were hard as fuck. (even had a long relationship with a girl who was heavily borderliner.. Which is truly emotionally and physically breaking..) With this girl however, everything is just great, have always been great and seem to be going in a great direction. and the most important part ; it's easy .We're just so in sync with eachother it's unbelievable. She doesn't care if I play 10 hours of sc2/HotS straight sometimes, she doesn't judge when I need to smoke a joint after a long workday to get relaxed. Hell, she even learned to roll them for me, so on occasion I come home and she will surprise me. The "sweet" things you do for your girl, it comes automatically when you meet a great girl. you want to do things for her, as she will do things for you. Even if you come into a "fight", it isn't so bad if you just respect eachother and try to understand eachother. I don't think I've ever really had a big argument with her and don't really see it coming in the near future. TLDR; It's not always that bad. Just find the right girl for you. And this is why I personally started having the approach of dating multiple women at first when single until I get to know them because I'm a horny fucker. And when I was single maybe over a year back and I liked a girl at first and she'd pull out I'd throw everything into that, idealizing. letting hormones take over, not asking if she's right for me in the first place, if it really is mutual effortless... And then get committed and invested with the wrong person not even asking if she's actually good for me. And it really is really rare that you find someone who's a good fit for you in the long run - just look at divorce rates, and even of those that stay together there's like 15% happy marriages I've heard said on a podcast the other day. So my approach is to get the physical stuff from multiple women (being single's fun for sure), compare, date more of them, get to know them... and naturally progress to exclusivity if we both actually feel like it, not because of some rules etc. And the girl is special enough once I get to know her so that I stop feeling like and don't even consider being with other girls. EDIT: I agree with you and yes, when that happens and I decide to commit to a person it means that 1) Your Personalities, Values and Attractions are so in sync being with her doesn't take pretty much any of your energy as you can just be yourself, and you always have a great time. 2) As she is attracted to you, she puts a lot effort in herself So because of 1) you have plenty of energy left over, energy you can use to plan dates, do stuff for her the guys mentioned etc. and Because of 2) It never feels like you're expending something as you are always naturally getting it back in other ways from her. That's why I asked initially what things to do to keep the spark going - it's stuff you want to do not a chore you need to do to keep a girl ![]() | ||
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obesechicken13
United States10467 Posts
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Kleinmuuhg
Vanuatu4091 Posts
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
Was going to see the girl yesterday but I have a exam in a few hours so I decided not to, I was super tired as well. Nofap has gone meh, fapped twice during the last month. I really thought I would be horny all the time but I only get horny after about a week of fapping, libido more or less dead. Saw a girl I have not seen before in my building, really cute blonde, going to ask her out when I see her next time. | ||
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WarSame
Canada1950 Posts
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SCguineapig
Netherlands289 Posts
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[UoN]Sentinel
United States11320 Posts
On August 24 2015 01:04 SCguineapig wrote: So yesterday I asked out a girl from work through whatssap (because I fucked up the one opportunity I had to ask her in person), however almost a day later she still hasn't read the message, Also on her whatssap it says that she was last online around 24 hours ago (which is possible.) However is this cause for alarm? I never ask girls out and im trippin hard right now. Could it be that she just blocked/ignored me? Is it possible to read the message without opening the app? If no, you're fine. If yes, pretend she did, if she does respond, it's a nice surprise, otherwise, ah well, c'est la vie. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Yes, yes it does, I went into the same habit as in my obsessive porn watching ways Deleted them from my phone And now it's nofap for a couple weeks for me ![]() | ||
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[UoN]Sentinel
United States11320 Posts
On August 24 2015 01:23 LemOn wrote: Wanted to ask if fapping to naked pics of the girl you're dating counts as porn. Yes, yes it does, I went into the same habit as in my obsessive porn watching ways Deleted them from my phone And now it's nofap for a couple weeks for me ![]() It's one of the most romantic things you could do though. | ||
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SCguineapig
Netherlands289 Posts
On August 24 2015 01:20 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: Is it possible to read the message without opening the app? If no, you're fine. If yes, pretend she did, if she does respond, it's a nice surprise, otherwise, ah well, c'est la vie. well she read it about half an hour ago but no response, oh well, better luck next time i guess. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On August 24 2015 01:25 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: It's one of the most romantic things you could do though. Haha I'm not so sure. Can't wait for her to tell me what she thinks about that ![]() | ||
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[UoN]Sentinel
United States11320 Posts
On August 24 2015 03:13 LemOn wrote: Haha I'm not so sure. Can't wait for her to tell me what she thinks about that ![]() I don't know, there's not very many ways to my heart, but telling me you jack off to pictures of me is one of them. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On August 24 2015 01:31 SCguineapig wrote: well she read it about half an hour ago but no response, oh well, better luck next time i guess. You won't get responses from 100% of people you message just so you know. Don't take it personally, they just get a fuckton of messages and they can be how picky they want. | ||
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WarSame
Canada1950 Posts
On August 24 2015 04:12 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: I don't know, there's not very many ways to my heart, but telling me you jack off to pictures of me is one of them. You're a dude, though, right? I doubt women would appreciate it in the same manner. It's kinda a breakdown in the golden rule. You see a lot of guys send dick pics online because they would love for women to send them nudies, but the women don't want to see random dicks. | ||
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[UoN]Sentinel
United States11320 Posts
On August 24 2015 06:50 WarSame wrote: You're a dude, though, right? I doubt women would appreciate it in the same manner. It's kinda a breakdown in the golden rule. You see a lot of guys send dick pics online because they would love for women to send them nudies, but the women don't want to see random dicks. I'll take a short survey next time I date a girl and report my findings. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
The guys in this article say the girls want to see shirtless pics and dicks even though they say they don't. | ||
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