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On August 11 2015 09:06 waffelz wrote:
lol... just sent her the picture [UoN]Sentinel posted and let her circle her favorite answer. Gonna do this when the time comes for sure, some of them are so terrible, they are almost awesome again.
Yep. If I ever message a girl and she responds with a pickup line, I open this image and go to town.
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On August 11 2015 08:52 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:Oh, then just use the source of all my glory: ![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/uK0Dq6G.jpg)
Hahaha, reminds me of the magazine page we had on the toilet door in my student flat. 100 greatest pickup lines. I still remember some of the worst/corniest ones:
Hey baby, is your father a baker, because you sure have some nice buns.
Baby, can I see your label? Just what I thought. Made in heaven.
Baby, is your dad a greengrocer? Because you sure have some beautiful melons.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
That shirt looks great on you, but would look better on my bedroom floor.
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Hey babe, let me be your derivative so I can lie tangent to your curves.
Hey babe, let me be your second derivative so I can explore your concavities.
How about you be sine squared and I be cosine squared, so together we can be 1?
+ Show Spoiler +
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On August 11 2015 11:47 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Hey babe, let me be your derivative so I can lie tangent to your curves. Hey babe, let me be your second derivative so I can explore your concavities. How about you be sine squared and I be cosine squared, so together we can be 1? + Show Spoiler +
Ay bby...
I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution?
Let me be your calc homework, cause I'll be hard and you can do me on your desk.
I must be f(x) = e^e^x, because my natural log is increasing exponentially.
I know the first 50 digits of pi, but I don't even know the first ten digits of your phone number (100% success rate so far after telling them of my math major)
And my favorite two by Day[9]:
The inches of my penis form a countably infinite set because every time you think you're out of inches, you can always find more by inspection.
If you draw a curve of [your] pleasure in bed with me, [you'll be] asymptotically close to climax and right when [you're] like, 'I'm epsilon there! I'm epsilon there', that's when I climax and you see that it breaks off like a step function, because at that point, sex is no longer continuous.
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On August 11 2015 12:56 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:Show nested quote +On August 11 2015 11:47 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Hey babe, let me be your derivative so I can lie tangent to your curves. Hey babe, let me be your second derivative so I can explore your concavities. How about you be sine squared and I be cosine squared, so together we can be 1? + Show Spoiler + Ay bby... I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution? Let me be your calc homework, cause I'll be hard and you can do me on your desk. I must be f(x) = e^e^x, because my natural log is increasing exponentially. I know the first 50 digits of pi, but I don't even know the first ten digits of your phone number (100% success rate so far after telling them of my math major) And my favorite two by Day[9]: The inches of my penis form a countably infinite set because every time you think you're out of inches, you can always find more by inspection.
If you draw a curve of [your] pleasure in bed with me, [you'll be] asymptotically close to climax and right when [you're] like, 'I'm epsilon there! I'm epsilon there', that's when I climax and you see that it breaks off like a step function, because at that point, sex is no longer continuous.
I must have watched that Day[9] clip ten times hahahaha I love those.
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I am so sad that I am not a lesbian, because otherwise I would always use "Yeah, but so is spaghetti before it gets wet and hot" as my answer for a "but I am straight"-turn down... but it doesnt really work out in german so it is ok I guess...
Update on the girl I am dating, it really paid off getting to know her best friend. We talked a bit and she gave me some insight on the girl I date. Apparently having spend time with her best friend on the nights-out wasn't a problem at all. We met a close friend of mine though, who had no idea who she is/that I am dating her and was also immediately start raging about one of my ex's, until I gestured him to switch topics. Seems she wants a sign that I am serious. I have to admit I haven't done much to prove that besides telling her. It is just that despite you would think otherwise, half of my friends and also my family floods me with annoying chit-chat as soon as such a new hit like I am surrounded by a bunch of old ladies from a village where nothing happens all day. I like my peace, that's why I come out with stuff like this very late. Plus it spares you the hassle of spreading the information, if things don't work out.
That being said, it seems like it is time to show some activity on my part again. In 2 days there is some sort of festival at the gym that happens every year over the course of a few days and I cut one week of my planned vacation for. Basically we gather, everyone brings some sort of food for the evening where we have a barbecue and until then, we have some sort of tournament going on where we simply go at each other. There is also a point system in place, depending on your weight/height and the one of your opponent, you get certain amount of points per win which you can trade for some prizes which are usually some special homemade food or alcohol. It also has proven very effectively on solving grudges that developed over the course of the year.
There will be a good portion of the people I know from the gym and more then enough to spread new around so she gets that. I will also see how she reacts to the whole thing and some of the more "interesting" personalities we have around the gym since both have been proven problematic for me in the past in terms of dating, which is why I tend to usually postpone it quite a bit. If she seems cool with it or at least not to driven away by it, I am going to casually ask her if she would mind calling our thing a relationship.
Next week I should have fully recovered and will go on my vacation. On return I will travel together with one of my sisters and we will take a long break in Paris to explore the city. I though about inviting her to meet us there since I realized how cheap you can get there and since you can easily rebook the tickets so we could stay longer in Paris if we want. This way we had some nice short-trip or even a few days of extra vacation and she would even meet one of my sisters, which should satisfy her. Will decide later on that though.
Overall it seems like a solid plan, I am just a bit annoyed that I had to hear that from her best friend and not from her since I we had some good communication so far and in general I do prefer to openly discuss such matters.
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Info from best friends is to be taken with a grain of salt imo.
Just think about the things you tell your best friend. Are you always completely honest? Do you never exaggerate or tell partial truths? I know I'm not. If he would relay this info to my gf she'd get a skewed picture of what's actually going on. Thankfully he would never do that. I'm somewhat surprised you're already on such good terms with her best friends that she's sharing info like that 
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On August 11 2015 20:21 Laurens wrote:Info from best friends is to be taken with a grain of salt imo. Just think about the things you tell your best friend. Are you always completely honest? Do you never exaggerate or tell partial truths? I know I'm not. If he would relay this info to my gf she'd get a skewed picture of what's actually going on. Thankfully he would never do that. I'm somewhat surprised you're already on such good terms with her best friends that she's sharing info like that
Idk, I feel with my best friend either I tell the truth or we know each other well enough to tell if we're exaggerating or joking. And if he told me he was seeing someone new I'd try my best to set them up.
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Could easilie be a case of she told her to tell me, which actually would annoy me a lot more. But in general, women tend to be a lot more open about their feelings when speaking to their best friends. Maybe she just want to help, I dont know. Even if she was exaggerating towards her friend, I am sure she wont mind me moving things a bit further.
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On August 11 2015 19:22 waffelz wrote: Seems she wants a sign that I am serious.
Okay.
She is still a bit insecure about what I mend with taking things slow I think.
Uhu.
All the dancing and stuff made her horny as hell, and when we got to bed she was extremely clingy.
I actually found it really amusing.
Yep yep.
I have to admit I haven't done much to prove that besides telling her.
From what you have written here, to me you sound like glorified friends. Doesn't really surprise me that she isn't sure if you're serious. Do you kiss her when you see her? You recently talked a lot about relationshippy things you did with your ex, do you do these with her too? Maybe FHRITP, and I'm completely serious.
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Hell no, of course I don't talk about stuff from my previous relationships with her. I have enough experience to know that unless there's a reason to, you should rather not bring up previous relationships. There is some stuff regarding the ex my friend raged about that I should address with her at some point, but that can and will wait. I talked about it in here, because to me it felt like useful information and my english is to awful to have phrased it differently. I think its just that the usual stuff doesn't apply to me like telling your friends/family:
- Nope. Not until I can answer possible questions with a simple "yes" or "no". And even then, I usually just "announce" it by being seen with my gf. I am not a "aaaaaay guess who's in a relationship now?"-type. I don't need a bunch of questions thrown at me, I prefer
So... you got a girlfriend again?
- Yup
How long are together now?
- About X months
Uhm... ok. I didn't notice
-Yeah
->back to stuff that's more interesting than my relationship-status
I am also pretty late with saying "I love you" and prefer to use "I am in love with you" until I really feel like it.
Calling it a relationship also isn't as important to me, as long as it feels like one. But some things should be rather spoken out I guess.
I know that I am partially responsible with my "taking things slow", but I also think she's also not used to being in charge. I do message/call her occasionally, but in general I leave it up to her to contact me, set up dates etc. since I agreed on her being in charge but also because I don't know yet how much space she needs. I am very romantic and cuddly, but I don't feel that a jumpstart would be appropriate and so far she hasn't signalled otherwise. Since I don't persuade her that much, it might come of as a lack of interest.
I also don't open up that fast since it is very easy to get a completely wrong perception of me and its something that you should take your time with anyway. Outside of relationships I am also more of a lone-wolf, even though it may appear otherwise regarding the amount of people I know. There are times where I socialise a lot and times where I'd rather be alone and since I was single for some time, some ice need to melt first. Like I do appreciate her very much, but over the last weeks there happened quite a lot, I am actually glad that I will be away for 2 weeks so I can clear my head a bit. After that, I expect me to be much more decisive.
In general I feel that I am much more comfortable with her around me by now, and I am definitely interested in her and I do wish to be in a relationship with her. So I am just going to ask her if she wants to join me on thursday and if she takes it well, I will tell her exactly what I said the sentence before and that I am completely honest with her. If she feels like something's strange she can just ask me. Or someone else at the event, most of them know me for quite some time and can assure her that I don't mess around. I know my early-game sucks, I am more of a late-game player  .
About the FHRITP... she will get that soon enough. I am sure she does understand my reasoning by now and she said she respects it. Also I am sure she wont have to wait much longer. At some point we will have sex, given my dry spell I will come way to soon and then make up for it by my remarkable going-down skills. Or her dry spell was just enough to also make her come almost immediately. Or I am very lucky and she prefers to try until I am successful. I would prefer a combination of 2&3. Either way, given thursday goes well, love will be made at some point, and the kingdom once again be filled with joy, happiness and butterflies, just like the ancient prophecy foretold.
Or the strapon-thing happens and being king will be a pain in the ass.
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Hell no, of course I don't talk about stuff from my previous relationships with her.
I maybe was a bit unclear. I meant if you did any relationship things with her, as in give her affection in odd ways?
Such as:
- cut her breakfast cheese/sausages in heart-shapes
- a calendar with something nice written on each page is also always a great gift
- back/foot massages are also usually very good and the ever favourite rubbing/scratching the spots where her bra usually is after it came off. Though I would say, this should rather be regular things.
- Since I always had the fortune of having busty girlfriends, sneaking a sticky-note under her boobs was also an all-time favourite of mine : D. Should be used with caution(like not if she goes to work and has to work with clients etc. ofc).
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I have to admit I was slacking quite a bit in that regard. I only made her an origami-bouquet so far, but mainly because she didnt believed me that I made the flower she saw on my desk when staying at my place. Good reminder, will fix that. And the sticky-note thing also has to happen :D. Fucking heat makes me a giant sloth. And I am simply unsure how much is to much as this point - even though I seem to have evidence that I am far from to much atm. Again, my early-game sucks.
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A couple questions:
is the "gym" you are talking about like "gyms" in the US or some kind of German-specific gymnasium?
you want to define a "relationship" before you've had sex with her?
you don't kiss her when you see her?
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On August 12 2015 02:30 IgnE wrote:
A couple questions:
is the "gym" you are talking about like "gyms" in the US or some kind of German-specific gymnasium?
you want to define a "relationship" before you've had sex with her?
you don't kiss her when you see her?
Wasn't waffelz the one whose friend owns the gym where there's a sort of ring inside where you can fight and he knocked the girl out?
Or who was that?
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is the "gym" you are talking about like "gyms" in the US or some kind of German-specific gymnasium?
It is basically a fitness center/gym combined with a gym for martial arts. We have some rooms with the usual equipment like weights, some trainings-devices and some self-made stuff. Then we also have some rooms some sort of boxing rings are located, but we are working on building 2 rooms completely into brawling rooms. Takes a while though since you need a special floor for that. But it isn't a "real"/commercial thing. It started out as a few rooms for fitness when the kids of the guy who owns it moved out and developed from there. The owner is pretty much set in terms of money and therefore didn't care about selling it and leasing is a pain in the ass he says, so he rather turned it into a place for him and his friends. Over the course of the years the circle of people who have access expanded and more rooms got changed which is still in process. I used "gym" because I felt that was the most appropriate term since it doesn't necessarily fit any category that I can think of, even in german. Situation at the moment is that a few people have a key, if you have a key you are allowed to invite people in, but you are responsible for them not taking stuff or making trouble. We have some former professionals/semi pros and instructors to help with stuff, the equipment like gloves, head guards and clothes are usually old stuff that didn't get used anymore and get gifted to us. In case of stuff that is less likely to just be given away like sandbags or some trainings-devices, we sometimes do a collection if needed. Its a unique place of pain and testosterone. And sometimes vodka.
you don't kiss her when you see her?
I do, she seems not so keen on showing affection in public though, therefore it didn't happen that much during our last date, at least until we got back to her place.
you want to define a "relationship" before you've had sex with her?
I don't really care about how it is labelled. All I care about is being interested in each other, seeing the potential for something that lasts long term and exclusivity. I definitely wouldn't define a relationship with sex though. Sex should happen at one point, but a relationship to me is a certain level of trust, affection and accountability. That's the basement in my opinion, that needs to be there. Sex is more like a roof - It keeps the rain out and prevents the walls from collapsing, but without a strong basement, it wont help at all.
From what I heard from her best friend, she does care most about the exclusivity and accountability at the moment since you cant force trust. By openly showing that you are together with someone, you basically enforce that you exclusively date them, since everything else isn't really accepted in society. At least I think that's what makes it important to her. I assume by now that she simply got burned before.
On August 12 2015 03:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
Wasn't waffelz the one whose friend owns the gym where there's a sort of ring inside where you can fight and he knocked the girl out?
Or who was that?
I "technically" knocked her out, by making her leg having a sleepy time . There's a big difference between a knock out and a technical knockout. Knockout means lights out, technical knockout means your still conscious, but you cant continue for some reason. It is also a lot less dangerous then a regular knockout. And she hit me first 
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On August 12 2015 03:28 waffelz wrote:Show nested quote +
is the "gym" you are talking about like "gyms" in the US or some kind of German-specific gymnasium?
It is basically a fitness center/gym combined with a gym for martial arts. We have some rooms with the usual equipment like weights, some trainings-devices and some self-made stuff. Then we also have some rooms some sort of boxing rings are located, but we are working on building 2 rooms completely into brawling rooms. Takes a while though since you need a special floor for that. But it isn't a "real"/commercial thing. It started out as a few rooms for fitness when the kids of the guy who owns it moved out and developed from there. The owner is pretty much set in terms of money and therefore didn't care about selling it and leasing is a pain in the ass he says, so he rather turned it into a place for him and his friends. Over the course of the years the circle of people who have access expanded and more rooms got changed which is still in process. I used "gym" because I felt that was the most appropriate term since it doesn't necessarily fit any category that I can think of, even in german. Situation at the moment is that a few people have a key, if you have a key you are allowed to invite people in, but you are responsible for them not taking stuff or making trouble. We have some former professionals/semi pros and instructors to help with stuff, the equipment like gloves, head guards and clothes are usually old stuff that didn't get used anymore and get gifted to us. In case of stuff that is less likely to just be given away like sandbags or some trainings-devices, we sometimes do a collection if needed. Its a unique place of pain and testosterone. And sometimes vodka. I do, she seems not so keen on showing affection in public though, therefore it didn't happen that much during our last date, at least until we got back to her place. I don't really care about how it is labelled. All I care about is being interested in each other, seeing the potential for something that lasts long term and exclusivity. I definitely wouldn't define a relationship with sex though. Sex should happen at one point, but a relationship to me is a certain level of trust, affection and accountability. That's the basement in my opinion, that needs to be there. Sex is more like a roof - It keeps the rain out and prevents the walls from collapsing, but without a strong basement, it wont help at all. From what I heard from her best friend, she does care most about the exclusivity and accountability at the moment since you cant force trust. By openly showing that you are together with someone, you basically enforce that you exclusively date them, since everything else isn't really accepted in society. At least I think that's what makes it important to her. I assume by now that she simply got burned before. Show nested quote +On August 12 2015 03:16 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
Wasn't waffelz the one whose friend owns the gym where there's a sort of ring inside where you can fight and he knocked the girl out?
Or who was that? I "technically" knocked her out, by making her leg having a sleepy time . There's a big difference between a knock out and a technical knockout. Knockout means lights out, technical knockout means your still conscious, but you cant continue for some reason. It is also a lot less dangerous then a regular knockout. And she hit me first
This is probably the only time where I've seen someone defend the "way" they "knocked out" their girlfriend and actually not just be rationalizing abuse.
"She hit me first" is the cherry on top.
I needed that laugh waffelz, thanks for that.
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On August 12 2015 07:43 GreenHorizons wrote:
This is probably the only time where I've seen someone defend the "way" they "knocked out" their girlfriend and actually not just be rationalizing abuse.
"She hit me first" is the cherry on top.
I needed that laugh waffelz, thanks for that.
wowowow wow wow... back off buddy.
- She wasnt my girlfirend at the time
- She hit me two times
- She hit me hard
- My bros where watching
- Some grappling needed to take place first, before I got "our" first kiss. I got used to the fighting back since then
Hope things seem better now  ...or did you mean I should have choked her out to show her real dominance? I thought about it, but all the fighting back and stuff, I was tired, my arm hurt and I dont know... I just didnt felt like strangleing young women that day.
+ Show Spoiler +For real: check the original post. We where sparring, both of us had blast and she kicks like a horse. The "she hit me first" wasn't a serious reason. Even though she almost knocked me out. Like "lights out"-knock out
EDIT:...did I actully miss your irony? Did I actually got meta-irony...ed?
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On August 12 2015 07:56 waffelz wrote:Show nested quote +On August 12 2015 07:43 GreenHorizons wrote:
This is probably the only time where I've seen someone defend the "way" they "knocked out" their girlfriend and actually not just be rationalizing abuse.
"She hit me first" is the cherry on top.
I needed that laugh waffelz, thanks for that. wowowow wow wow... back off buddy. - She wasnt my girlfirend at the time - She hit me two times - She hit me hard - My bros where watching - Some grappling needed to take place first, before I got "our" first kiss. I got used to the fighting back since then Hope things seem better now ...or did you mean I should have choked her out to show her real dominance? I thought about it, but all the fighting back and stuff, I was tired, my arm hurt and I dont know... I just didnt felt like strangleing young women that day. + Show Spoiler +For real: check the original post. We where sparring, both of us had blast and she kicks like a horse. The "she hit me first" wasn't a serious reason. Even though she almost knocked me out. Like "lights out"-knock out
EDIT:...did I actully miss your irony? Did I actually got meta-irony...ed?
Yes?
I don't think your a woman beater or anything. Just that without context it sounded hilariously bad.
You're a little weird, but you seem like a decent guy in my book
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Yeah... seems rather obvious now. I guess I was to keen on writing my explanation, which clearly made everything look better
She accepted my invitation. Lets see how she reacts to me looking like I travelled the route 66 with a sign that says "Everyone who drives a harley is a fag" after tomorrow, just for fun, a few jars of pickled pork sausage, pickled vegetables and if things go really well also some jerky while getting way to excited about it. I am already hyped.
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EPT
