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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
Nah this thread is first about saying your shitty dating stories. The whole advise part just snuck in.
Anyway I wish I had recent dating stories but I've sort of been going steady for almost 2 months now and it's just been a very cute relationship. If I remember some funny stuff from the period when I was doing pickup artist stuff like 3 years ago I'll just toss in a random story 
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haha yeah just reading some of these responses. I kinda realized that on my own. I have gone after other women besides her, sorry didn't really clairfy that. I have liked this girl for 7 years, yes, but I have gone after other girls. But either they didn't turn into anything or those relationships ended. I like her...and I want her and too be her man. She knows that I guess. Maybe the flowers I sent her send that message. Maybe she realizes that the greatest guy in her world is right in front of her...but until then.... I guess I keep looking for the "one." Anywho can't really worry about this I have to prepare for exams and I gotta be decent looking for a career fair on Thursday, can't show up with red eyes lol.
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Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives.
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No, they are not, and your brother sounds like a chotch to be frank.
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On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives.
In general, giving gifts without dating is a fast-track to friendzone material, cookies or otherwise. As for the actual baking: in the modern world, I wouldn't classify baking as a girl-only activity, and if you enjoy doing it I'm sure she won't mind reaping the benefits once you're in a relationship!
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Giving a female something on valentines day is not a fast track to the friendzone. In fact, some artfully prepared baked goods can work wonders for progressing romance when presented appropriately, no matter the day.
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On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives.
That's dumb. Make the cookies.
First, it's not girly or manly it's just cookies. The only thing manly or girly is the person, not the gift. Your brother offers a knife for valentine's day ?
Second, you already said you will do it... and you want to do it.
However don't really think it will help you by itself to advance things forward. You still have to do your own stuff, cookies or not.
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On February 13 2014 05:49 rezoacken wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives. That's dumb. Make the cookies. First, it's not girly or manly it's just cookies. The only thing manly or girly is the person, not the gift. Your brother offers a knife for valentine's day ? Second, you already said you will do it... and you want to do it. However don't really think it will help you by itself to advance things forward. You still have to do your own stuff, cookies or not.
Yeah, I might pair the cookies with something else like asking her out if there's time. Unfortunately, she's been quite busy this semester compared to last semester, though she's seems to be honest with me about what exactly has been keeping her busy. She hardly even has time to see her close friends. I just want to put my interest out there in a well-presented way, gauge her interest, and see what happens from there.
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On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives.
beta as shit. first it is cookies, then before you know it, youll be sitting bedside with a buttplug while she cuckolds you
do something alpha as fuck, like buying her whiskey for valentines day and blowing her off. that kind of negging is fool proof
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On February 13 2014 05:40 Acrofales wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives. In general, giving gifts without dating is a fast-track to friendzone material, cookies or otherwise. As for the actual baking: in the modern world, I wouldn't classify baking as a girl-only activity, and if you enjoy doing it I'm sure she won't mind reaping the benefits once you're in a relationship!
Something I heard once was the difference between getting into the friendzone or the datezone is if you are doing things for the girl or with the girl. Although doing something for her as a gesture to ask her out is a different situation. If you're making her cookied for valentines day and are going to ask her out I don't see any issue.
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On February 13 2014 06:43 Najda wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 05:40 Acrofales wrote:On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives. In general, giving gifts without dating is a fast-track to friendzone material, cookies or otherwise. As for the actual baking: in the modern world, I wouldn't classify baking as a girl-only activity, and if you enjoy doing it I'm sure she won't mind reaping the benefits once you're in a relationship! Something I heard once was the difference between getting into the friendzone or the datezone is if you are doing things for the girl or with the girl. Although doing something for her as a gesture to ask her out is a different situation. If you're making her cookied for valentines day and are going to ask her out I don't see any issue.
What I literally told her was "I have an urge to make cookies for personal use. If I have any extra, I might forward or fax them to you." Conveniently, she recommended me a recipe that she's been craving recently. It would be great to pair it up with a date, but if she can't eat or hang out that day, I want to at least get something done.
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Invite her over to make the cookies together.
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On February 13 2014 07:02 Najda wrote:
Invite her over to make the cookies together.
That would be perfect (plus booze), except for the logistical problem of both of us commuting to university from home on opposite sides of town.
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On February 13 2014 05:34 Nerevar wrote:
Are cookies too beta/feminine of a thing for Valentines? I've recently been interested in baking cookies to cross that off my bucket list, and this girl I've been talking to for these past few months mentioned that she's been craving ginger snap cookies when I studied/hanged out with her yesterday. Unfortunately, my brother said that it's a very girly thing for guys to do and has recommended against it, but I've already told her I'm doing it this week. And some other friends might appreciate some cookies too, especially if they could use them for girls in their lives.
It's like the best of both worlds. Even if she doesn't like you, you can still eat cookies. And if she doesn't like you, you get even MORE cookies.
But really, it would be better to make cookies together. Perhaps keep that as an ace up your sleeve for another time if you can't make them on Valentine's day.
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On February 13 2014 07:13 Nerevar wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 07:02 Najda wrote:
Invite her over to make the cookies together. That would be perfect (plus booze), except for the logistical problem of both of us commuting to university from home on opposite sides of town.
How long is the drive from her house to yours?
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Northern Ireland25283 Posts
It'd be like, totally cool if it was accepted that interactions are a bit more complicated than being 'alpha' or 'beta' lol
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On February 13 2014 07:33 Wombat_NI wrote:
It'd be like, totally cool if it was accepted that interactions are a bit more complicated than being 'alpha' or 'beta' lol
Should we include delta and epsilon then?
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Northern Ireland25283 Posts
All the way to omega baby
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On February 13 2014 07:31 Najda wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 07:13 Nerevar wrote:On February 13 2014 07:02 Najda wrote:
Invite her over to make the cookies together. That would be perfect (plus booze), except for the logistical problem of both of us commuting to university from home on opposite sides of town. How long is the drive from her house to yours?
About 40 minutes, but the fact that both of us are still living with family and commuting to uni really does make this option out of the question right now until I get my own place hopefully within a semester or two.
I'm not trying to bang her lol. Not yet at least. I just plan to state my intentions, gauge her interest, and move on from there depending on her response.
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On February 13 2014 07:40 Nerevar wrote:Show nested quote +On February 13 2014 07:31 Najda wrote:On February 13 2014 07:13 Nerevar wrote:On February 13 2014 07:02 Najda wrote:
Invite her over to make the cookies together. That would be perfect (plus booze), except for the logistical problem of both of us commuting to university from home on opposite sides of town. How long is the drive from her house to yours? About 40 minutes, but the fact that both of us are still living with family and commuting to uni really does make this option out of the question right now until I get my own place hopefully within a semester or two. I'm not trying to bang her lol. Not yet at least. I just plan to state my intentions, gauge her interest, and move on from there depending on her response.
Translation is that you WANT to bang her but you're not allowing yourself to be honest with yourself or her about it. Instead you'd rather give random statements and wait for her approval before doing anything that even remotely involves personal risk.
Now that is a lot more beta and unattractive than any amount of cookies you could ever make for someone.
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EPT
