EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 400
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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Nerevar
547 Posts
On February 06 2014 04:34 MysteryMeat1 wrote: In retrospect i kind of worded it as a date lunch not a hang out lunch. On the plus side sh kmows i like her and still talks to me. Then at least a lunch date will probably work out more likely than not  | ||
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Liquorshot_852
Korea (South)72 Posts
the strange thing is...you really want to get in a relationship when you're single... but when you're in a relationship, you really want to have some alone time without the gf... anyone know how to get over this?? or is it just me? | ||
Firebolt145
Lalalaland34510 Posts
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chadissilent
Canada1187 Posts
On February 06 2014 06:02 Liquorshot_852 wrote: 3 years, 2 months, then 1 year. currently on 4th for 2 months.. the strange thing is...you really want to get in a relationship when you're single... but when you're in a relationship, you really want to have some alone time without the gf... anyone know how to get over this?? or is it just me? "Yo bitch, why you always all up in my space? Pump those brakes and slow your roll homie, I need ma jerkoff time" | ||
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dabom88
United States3483 Posts
The one I think looks the cutest... is clearly not a native English speaker. We have several native Chinese/Taiwanese girls in the class, and not being able to speak fluent English is a big turn off for me. The whole communication barrier, and I take pride in my humor, which many non-fluent English speakers will not get as well. The girl I'm most attracted to who can speak fluent English... lives 60 miles away from me. I live 30 miles away from UCLA, she also lives 30 miles... in the opposite direction. She's also busy most of the time, works at an accounting firm, and is only taking one class. Shame, she seemed really nice and is very fun to talk to. The girl I connect the most with (we're both tech geeks and love dogs)... has a boyfriend. Oh well, we can still be friends. Bah bah bah. | ||
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Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
So this girl was in to me and I was in to her. I see her and compliment her dress. After we're talking for a bit she asks me to rate her out of 10. + Show Spoiler + I said "uhmmm, not falling for that" or something like that | ||
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WombaT
Northern Ireland27478 Posts
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dravernor
Netherlands6192 Posts
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Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
On February 06 2014 07:34 Wombat_NI wrote: I generally respond with something 2 points below what I actually consider them, and then say 'if you made a bit of an effort you could be...' or whatever. Again it's very much in the delivery, so if you can't pull of that borderline social-retard quirkiness you could try something else TBH that just seems like a good way to piss someone off. It's not like I was just picking up this girl, I had known her for about three weeks. | ||
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phyren
United States1067 Posts
As a rule of thumb, I would always try to turn questions with 1 word or short phrase answers on their head in order to engage in an actual conversation. It will allow you both to get to know each other better and avoids situations in which either of you are saying something generic and boring that the other person has likely heard often before. | ||
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Dogfoodboy16
364 Posts
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Kleinmuuhg
Vanuatu4091 Posts
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Niflheim
United States313 Posts
On February 06 2014 06:02 Liquorshot_852 wrote: 3 years, 2 months, then 1 year. currently on 4th for 2 months.. the strange thing is...you really want to get in a relationship when you're single... but when you're in a relationship, you really want to have some alone time without the gf... anyone know how to get over this?? or is it just me? That isn't something you get over... it is just something you have to work out with your girlfriend. If you both have vastly different ideas of how much time together and how much alone or guy time you need, then most likely the relationship won't work out. If there are slight difference, then it is easy to make compromises. My relationships have worked out pretty similar to yours... 4 years, 4 months, 1 year, and now on a 4th for about a month. In my first relationship, there was no such thing as alone time for either of us. It wasn't a problem for the longest time, but then in the last year when we were having issues it became a big deal. After that, I tried to put it out up front. The next chick I dated was pretty crazy and ended up trying to move in with me after 3 months and didn't respect my space at all. The next girl started out respecting it and then got really clingy when she moved in (I'm not so sure moving in together before being together at least a year is a good idea anymore...) In this current relationship, I just said it flat out... I go to the rock gym 2 nights during the week and so those nights I'm busy and can't do anything. It lets me get in a good work out and keeps the rest of the night to myself to do whatever I want or need to get done and so far she has respected that. She doesn't really text me those nights and if she does she knows she won't get a quick response. | ||
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Najda
United States3765 Posts
On February 06 2014 07:45 Chocolate wrote: Yeah same. I think it's kind of gross. I didn't even have anything in mind because I guess I subscribe to the binary system (attractive or not). I honestly still don't even know what she was looking for as a response. I'm curious why you think it's gross? It's just a way of referencing someone's attractiveness compared to the average person. | ||
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Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
On February 06 2014 08:03 Najda wrote: I'm curious why you think it's gross? It's just a way of referencing someone's attractiveness compared to the average person. It seems kind of dehumanizing. I don't look at a girl and say "hmm I like her but she is only a 7, I can only be seen with 8+" I just find certain people attractive and certain ones not attractive. Maybe I am in the minority here. Also I don't really think it is a reference to the average person. If I had to guess I'd say most people would give their partners a 7/10. | ||
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Najda
United States3765 Posts
On February 06 2014 08:08 Chocolate wrote: It seems kind of dehumanizing. I don't look at a girl and say "hmm I like her but she is only a 7, I can only be seen with 8+" I just find certain people attractive and certain ones not attractive. Maybe I am in the minority here. Also I don't really think it is a reference to the average person. If I had to guess I'd say most people would give their partners a 7/10. I agree that passing judgements based on an arbitrary number scale would be shallow and 'gross', but how is it different than saying in your binary system that the person is a 0 and you only date 1's? | ||
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rezoacken
Canada2719 Posts
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NewSunshine
United States5938 Posts
On February 06 2014 08:16 Najda wrote: I agree that passing judgements based on an arbitrary number scale would be shallow and 'gross', but how is it different than saying in your binary system that the person is a 0 and you only date 1's? If I had to say, a system of 0's and 1's merely sorts out which ones you'd take an interest in, without diving into the details and deriving a more objectified value. It's a healthier rule of thumb than 1-10 because it puts less focus on appearance, an thinking about someone's appearance, which leaves more brainpower for being a better human being. I tend to identify with that more binary way of putting it, some girls I find cute and would like to pursue, some I don't, but I don't wanna go too much into it, because I really value the personality side of it too. | ||
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WarSame
Canada1950 Posts
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