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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On December 10 2013 01:18 r.Evo wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 00:07 TOCHMY wrote:
I hate this fucking game we're playing. Why can't people just be straight with each other and say what's on their mind? Show nested quote +"So maybe we can hang out in the evening?" She said this the day before, Friday, and I said "Sure, call me then." Turn the bolded part into something "real" aka "Does 8 pm at my place / in front of place xyz work for you?" and make a fixed date right then and there. Done.
ya i noticed that helped me a lot, just being more strict with the times and stuff. At the whole no response discussion that took place. I was hanging out with this girl and we made tentative plans to hang out sunday. I coudln't fix anything in place cause i had a major exam the day afterwards but i ended up texting her the night before asking if she wanted to hang out. Got no response. texted her two days later asking if she was alright. She said yes and that she was just super busy. which was pretty much an uggg moment. You should at least have the decency to text me if your busy. Asked if she wanted to hang out over the weekend but she said she was going back home which is a few hours away. She comes back and i text her seeing if she wanted to get brunch at 11:30 and I got no reply. I just stopped texting her right there. I thought it was strange that she wasn't responding even though we had been hanging out for the past month and a half. But sometimes it doesn't work out. My closure was the fact that she wasn't responding. If she wanted to hang out then she can text me.
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On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board.
You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked since two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her .
I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again .
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On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:Show nested quote +On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again .
It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it
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On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it
At this point even just being friends with her will be hard if i could ever call her a friend . I'm not the vengeful or angry type of person , but i do have my pride as a man . I'll try to ignore her as much as she ignores me now , but keeping the minimal courtesy as fellow colleagues is a must . It will be hard facing her anywhere without forcing some words out of my mouth .
It's funny , because a few months back she shared this quote on facebook " If you think that words hurt , then silence can kill " and i am tempted to like , share or comment on it now to make her feel like a hypocrite , but as i said i don't want to go there ...
Edit: Just so anyone doesn't get any more wrong ideas : I don't think she is mental or anything and i respect her answer even though i find it somewhat lame . I don't know what kind of communication to have with her or at all at this point i'll just let it flow whatever it goes .
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On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it
She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them.
Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly.
I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation:
1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him.
2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it.
So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ?
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so glad to be born like this now that i know penis provides man pride and vagina provides being mental
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On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ?
Don't get me wrong i'm just extremely monogamous when it comes to women . I've liked like 3 - 4 women in my life at best .
1. I don't think she is mental (whatever that means) , but maybe a coward as you said . I can't understand her really .
2. I didn't really had the hots for her for 2 years it's just that back then i started to like her . I had it like for 6 months and even then i didn't chat with her a lot since we both don't use technology to communicate much and don't have the time to talk much in real life - like virtually 1 time a month at best . I also never asked her out once after she said she had a boyfriend , i barely chat with her online this past year . I went on dates with other women , but couldn't fall for any of them. It was just a coincidence that a common friend of ours told me that she is single now . I was fucking sceptical at first and for good reason as you can see , but i decided to give it a shot . Even if i did hope for her to break up with her boyfriend i didn't act any different with her then before i started to like her . And mind you that i knew her for 4 years , but started liking her 2 years ago . I just don't bother with women unless i feel like it's worth a shot . it saves me a lot of time that i can concentrate on accomplishing other things like finishing medical university and having a peaceful and fun life.
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On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ?
A Good Post.
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On December 10 2013 04:21 QuanticHawk wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ? A Good Post.
I agree. much more eloquent than what i wrote.
you can even add in that the girl tells the guy that has a crush on her, in a nice way, that shes not interested if its not clear enough yet who is more mental in that situation.
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On December 10 2013 02:32 MysteryMeat1 wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 01:18 r.Evo wrote:On December 10 2013 00:07 TOCHMY wrote:
I hate this fucking game we're playing. Why can't people just be straight with each other and say what's on their mind? "So maybe we can hang out in the evening?" She said this the day before, Friday, and I said "Sure, call me then." Turn the bolded part into something "real" aka "Does 8 pm at my place / in front of place xyz work for you?" and make a fixed date right then and there. Done. ya i noticed that helped me a lot, just being more strict with the times and stuff. At the whole no response discussion that took place. I was hanging out with this girl and we made tentative plans to hang out sunday. I coudln't fix anything in place cause i had a major exam the day afterwards but i ended up texting her the night before asking if she wanted to hang out. Got no response. texted her two days later asking if she was alright. She said yes and that she was just super busy. which was pretty much an uggg moment. You should at least have the decency to text me if your busy. Asked if she wanted to hang out over the weekend but she said she was going back home which is a few hours away. She comes back and i text her seeing if she wanted to get brunch at 11:30 and I got no reply. I just stopped texting her right there. I thought it was strange that she wasn't responding even though we had been hanging out for the past month and a half. But sometimes it doesn't work out. My closure was the fact that she wasn't responding. If she wanted to hang out then she can text me.
Personally in ANY situation where I don't get an answer back it's a gigantic red flag for me that I fucked up something along the way. If a text goes unanswered I just let it be and call her a couple of days later. If she picks up there is still a good chance I can get back in, if she doesn't it's pretty much gg right there. In most cases I'd keep the number around and try again after a couple of weeks but that has a really, really low success chance.
Texting again after a text went unanswered is equivalent to shooting yourself in the foot tho. =P
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On December 10 2013 04:22 ComaDose wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 04:21 QuanticHawk wrote:On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ? A Good Post. I agree. much more eloquent than what i wrote. you can even add in that the girl tells the guy that has a crush on her, in a nice way, that shes not interested if its not clear enough yet who is more mental in that situation.
Don't know man , i find more respect in straight answers then just the ignore until over option . Maybe it works better for her , but not for me . It seems disrespectful to a fellow colleague and a "friend" and makes her look like a perky woman which isn't at all what i thought she was . Also for the second time i don't think she is mental , and could anyone tell me what it really means ? Does mental mean crazy because my english is not very good , i guess i'll search it on google .
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On December 10 2013 04:30 raga4ka wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 04:22 ComaDose wrote:On December 10 2013 04:21 QuanticHawk wrote:On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ? A Good Post. I agree. much more eloquent than what i wrote. you can even add in that the girl tells the guy that has a crush on her, in a nice way, that shes not interested if its not clear enough yet who is more mental in that situation. Don't know man , i find more respect in straight answers then just the ignore until over option . Maybe it works better for her , but not for me . It seems disrespectful to a fellow colleague and a "friend" and makes her look like a perky woman which isn't at all that i thought she was . Also for the second time i don't think she is mental , and could anyone tell me what it really means ? Does mental mean crazy because my english is not very good , i guess i'll search it on google .
Oh sorry I got 2 stories confused. Ignoring someone is always rude.
I believe people are using the word mental to mean crazy yeah. I was mostly responding to those people.
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So back in Sept my wife and I split after 10years. We had been pretty open, she liked women so we shared girlfriends and I was free to roam around. I wouldn't say I was a "pick up artist" or whatever but I did alright for myself, highlights including 3 run way models in a single weekend and a hat-trick. It hit me a harder than I ever thought it would and I pretty much stopped playing altogether for 3weeks. Since being released back into the wild my game has been off, where as before I felt like I could open up on Scarlett Jo herself and not give a fuck about the answer because I already knew I was going home to the most amazing woman I've ever met, I now find myself needing validation from targets and I'm slow to just move on to the next one if the first isn't instantly falling head over heels for me, so for the first time ever I'm focusing on results and even bothering to keep count of women, only 12 since Oct 13th. I know the basic rules of break ups that are posted on every "player forum" but none of them seem to be based on such a long term relationship. So if anyone has some personal experience and can give better advice than "no contact" or "just get more bitches" I'd appreciate it.
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On December 10 2013 04:55 NotSorry wrote:
So back in Sept my wife and I split after 10years. We had been pretty open, she liked women so we shared girlfriends and I was free to roam around. I wouldn't say I was a "pick up artist" or whatever but I did alright for myself, highlights including 3 run way models in a single weekend and a hat-trick. It hit me a harder than I ever thought it would and I pretty much stopped playing altogether for 3weeks. Since being released back into the wild my game has been off, where as before I felt like I could open up on Scarlett Jo herself and not give a fuck about the answer because I already knew I was going home to the most amazing woman I've ever met, I now find myself needing validation from targets and I'm slow to just move on to the next one if the first isn't instantly falling head over heels for me, so for the first time ever I'm focusing on results and even bothering to keep count of women, only 12 since Oct 13th. I know the basic rules of break ups that are posted on every "player forum" but none of them seem to be based on such a long term relationship. So if anyone has some personal experience and can give better advice than "no contact" or "just get more bitches" I'd appreciate it.
Maybe you've gotten too old to consider women "targets" but maybe that's just me.
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I dunno, no contact is always the way to go, and don't have any of her shit or photos still floating around, but I usually go through a couple weeks or months of just not caring about women at all and focusing on getting drunk and doing stupid shit with friends. That and gym/sports more.
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On December 10 2013 05:09 QuanticHawk wrote:
I dunno, no contact is always the way to go, and don't have any of her shit or photos still floating around, but I usually go through a couple weeks or months of just not caring about women at all and focusing on getting drunk and doing stupid shit with friends. That and gym/sports more.
Yea probably should have added, we have 3 kids so no contact is really hard since I talk to or see her nearly daily to pick up/drop off kids or school functions.
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On December 10 2013 04:16 raga4ka wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ? Don't get me wrong i'm just extremely monogamous when it comes to women . I've liked like 3 - 4 women in my life at best . 1. I don't think she is mental (whatever that means) , but maybe a coward as you said . I can't understand her really . 2. I didn't really had the hots for her for 2 years it's just that back then i started to like her . I had it like for 6 months and even then i didn't chat with her a lot since we both don't use technology to communicate much and don't have the time to talk much in real life - like virtually 1 time a month at best . I also never asked her out once after she said she had a boyfriend , i barely chat with her online this past year . I went on dates with other women , but couldn't fall for any of them. It was just a coincidence that a common friend of ours told me that she is single now . I was fucking sceptical at first and for good reason as you can see , but i decided to give it a shot . Even if i did hope for her to break up with her boyfriend i didn't act any different with her then before i started to like her . And mind you that i knew her for 4 years , but started liking her 2 years ago . I just don't bother with women unless i feel like it's worth a shot . it saves me a lot of time that i can concentrate on accomplishing other things like finishing medical university and having a peaceful and fun life.
To be honest my post was more directed to the the generalization I quoted based on only one bit of your story than your specific situation (i didn't read your previous posts for example).
As for your current post if I understand you talk to her not even once a month, for 4 years. And then you say she's one of those very few that you are interested in. To me there is a big disconnection there. I'd expect someone to be picky about women to talk/meet one he deems worthy a lot more than that.
Mental means insane/crazy by the way.
On December 10 2013 04:55 NotSorry wrote:
So back in Sept my wife and I split after 10years. We had been pretty open, she liked women so we shared girlfriends and I was free to roam around. I wouldn't say I was a "pick up artist" or whatever but I did alright for myself, highlights including 3 run way models in a single weekend and a hat-trick. It hit me a harder than I ever thought it would and I pretty much stopped playing altogether for 3weeks. Since being released back into the wild my game has been off, where as before I felt like I could open up on Scarlett Jo herself and not give a fuck about the answer because I already knew I was going home to the most amazing woman I've ever met, I now find myself needing validation from targets and I'm slow to just move on to the next one if the first isn't instantly falling head over heels for me, so for the first time ever I'm focusing on results and even bothering to keep count of women, only 12 since Oct 13th. I know the basic rules of break ups that are posted on every "player forum" but none of them seem to be based on such a long term relationship. So if anyone has some personal experience and can give better advice than "no contact" or "just get more bitches" I'd appreciate it.
I have difficulty pinpointing your issue. Do you mean "how do I get over her ?".
In your specific situation I'd stop trying to meet some random women. Give yourself some time and instead use your new freetime to do stuff you always wanted to do or try. Don't bother trying to just sleep your way through it. You were with what you think was one of the great women of your life so it's only through time and self reflection that I think you'll be able to start afresh.
The usual advice of "just get more bitches" only works when the real issue is the person has insecurities to move to a different girl and loneliness is a deep issue. That doesn't seem to be your case so I wouldn't advise it.
Edit: Not saying you should be chaste either.
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I mean don't get me wrong I still love her and probably always will, but I have no interest in getting her back or anything like that. I want to get myself back to who I was while I was with her.
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On December 10 2013 05:46 rezoacken wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 04:16 raga4ka wrote:On December 10 2013 03:43 rezoacken wrote:On December 10 2013 03:14 LongShot27 wrote:On December 10 2013 03:05 raga4ka wrote:On December 06 2013 05:03 LongShot27 wrote:
Well that friend of mine that I asked out finally gave me an answer "you're a really nice guy, but I'm still into my ex and we might get back together, we're still friends right?" And it kinda sucks and hurts like a bitch but I'm sure it happened for a reason. Thanks for the advice and good luck wishes guys. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. You are lucky . I got the silent death treatment. This girl i liked for two years , which she had a boyfriend back then and didn't want to lose our "friendship" (with the same we are still friends right? quote) , didn't even bother giving me an answer this past weeks. On the student holiday this weekend 6 - 8 of december i wanted to talk to her and asked her / tried to dance with her . Her behavior was so cold that i got the feeling that i am not wanted anywhere near her . I wanted to force a few words out of my mouth , but i thought that it wasn't worth it in the end. I ask you how can i even be a friend to her , when she acted like i didn't even exist this past 3 weeks after talking to her for years now ? I guess i misjudged her character. What looked like a cute , modest and hardworking girl lacked a lot in kindness , which is what i most adore in a girl or even human . Well i feel kinda bamboozled now , even though i knew it was coming i didn't think it would come this way . Well on the good side i can finally concentrate on my studies again . It sucks dude, women are mental, but you just gotta deal with it She just got annoyed with a guy that was just waiting for her for 2 years in which she never had any romantic interest. And didn't want to deal with him hitting on her now that she's single. She kept him around as a "friend" while the guy was hot on her all along and I'll admit it ain't really cool but that's just what people do, they like to keep around people that like them. Coward for not giving a straight answer ? Probably. Mental ? Hardly. I really wonder who you guys think is the most "mental" in quoted situation: 1. The guy that has a crush on a girl, get the "let stay friend" sentence but still stays around for 2 years all hot hoping for her to break up so that he can then ask her out in case during these two years she suddenly became attracted by him. 2. The girl that accepts a guy she knows has a crush on her to stay in her environment for two years. Because after all she probably benefits from some attention, compliments or favors. But know that she's single know what's coming but doesn't want to deal with it. So can we stop with the whole "women are mental" garbage mentality ? Don't get me wrong i'm just extremely monogamous when it comes to women . I've liked like 3 - 4 women in my life at best . 1. I don't think she is mental (whatever that means) , but maybe a coward as you said . I can't understand her really . 2. I didn't really had the hots for her for 2 years it's just that back then i started to like her . I had it like for 6 months and even then i didn't chat with her a lot since we both don't use technology to communicate much and don't have the time to talk much in real life - like virtually 1 time a month at best . I also never asked her out once after she said she had a boyfriend , i barely chat with her online this past year . I went on dates with other women , but couldn't fall for any of them. It was just a coincidence that a common friend of ours told me that she is single now . I was fucking sceptical at first and for good reason as you can see , but i decided to give it a shot . Even if i did hope for her to break up with her boyfriend i didn't act any different with her then before i started to like her . And mind you that i knew her for 4 years , but started liking her 2 years ago . I just don't bother with women unless i feel like it's worth a shot . it saves me a lot of time that i can concentrate on accomplishing other things like finishing medical university and having a peaceful and fun life. To be honest my post was more directed to the the generalization I quoted based on only one bit of your story than your specific situation (i didn't read your previous posts for example). As for your current post if I understand you talk to her not even once a month, for 4 years. And then you say she's one of those very few that you are interested in. To me there is a big disconnection there. I'd expect someone to be picky about women to talk/meet one he deems worthy a lot more than that. Mental means insane/crazy by the way. Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 04:55 NotSorry wrote:
So back in Sept my wife and I split after 10years. We had been pretty open, she liked women so we shared girlfriends and I was free to roam around. I wouldn't say I was a "pick up artist" or whatever but I did alright for myself, highlights including 3 run way models in a single weekend and a hat-trick. It hit me a harder than I ever thought it would and I pretty much stopped playing altogether for 3weeks. Since being released back into the wild my game has been off, where as before I felt like I could open up on Scarlett Jo herself and not give a fuck about the answer because I already knew I was going home to the most amazing woman I've ever met, I now find myself needing validation from targets and I'm slow to just move on to the next one if the first isn't instantly falling head over heels for me, so for the first time ever I'm focusing on results and even bothering to keep count of women, only 12 since Oct 13th. I know the basic rules of break ups that are posted on every "player forum" but none of them seem to be based on such a long term relationship. So if anyone has some personal experience and can give better advice than "no contact" or "just get more bitches" I'd appreciate it. I have difficulty pinpointing your issue. Do you mean "how do I get over her ?". In your specific situation I'd stop trying to meet some random women. Give yourself some time and instead use your new freetime to do stuff you always wanted to do or try. Don't bother trying to just sleep your way through it. You were with what you think was one of the great women of your life so it's only through time and self reflection that I think you'll be able to start afresh. The usual advice of "just get more bitches" only works when the real issue is the person has insecurities to move to a different girl and loneliness is a deep issue. That doesn't seem to be your case so I wouldn't advise it. Edit: Not saying you should be chaste either.
You misunderstood a bit or rather i didn't write it properly . I liked her since 2 years ago , but knew her since 4 years go . Before i liked her , i was in a pause after a 6-8 month relationship . Well we see each other almost everyday , but other then the casual Hello and few words work/study related there wasn't much conversation . A 5 - 10 minutes chat happens like 2 times a month at best , sometimes especially in the summers we don't communicate at all , also before exams which is an other 2 months . Aside from very few occasions we are never alone , but with the company of other friends/collegueas . After she told me that she has a boyfriend i didn't communicate with her much until recently when we were at a disco where i got the news that she broke up with him which i mentioned in my previous post here a few weeks ago .
Doesn't really matter at this point , i wasn't all hot for her as much as in the past , but still got my hopes up . I am not really dissapointed at the result as much as the way it was served . It seemed kinda tasteless , and left me with a few questions , but i sure as hell know that she doesn't like me so i would not bother asking them .
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On December 10 2013 04:28 r.Evo wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2013 02:32 MysteryMeat1 wrote:On December 10 2013 01:18 r.Evo wrote:On December 10 2013 00:07 TOCHMY wrote:
I hate this fucking game we're playing. Why can't people just be straight with each other and say what's on their mind? "So maybe we can hang out in the evening?" She said this the day before, Friday, and I said "Sure, call me then." Turn the bolded part into something "real" aka "Does 8 pm at my place / in front of place xyz work for you?" and make a fixed date right then and there. Done. ya i noticed that helped me a lot, just being more strict with the times and stuff. At the whole no response discussion that took place. I was hanging out with this girl and we made tentative plans to hang out sunday. I coudln't fix anything in place cause i had a major exam the day afterwards but i ended up texting her the night before asking if she wanted to hang out. Got no response. texted her two days later asking if she was alright. She said yes and that she was just super busy. which was pretty much an uggg moment. You should at least have the decency to text me if your busy. Asked if she wanted to hang out over the weekend but she said she was going back home which is a few hours away. She comes back and i text her seeing if she wanted to get brunch at 11:30 and I got no reply. I just stopped texting her right there. I thought it was strange that she wasn't responding even though we had been hanging out for the past month and a half. But sometimes it doesn't work out. My closure was the fact that she wasn't responding. If she wanted to hang out then she can text me. Personally in ANY situation where I don't get an answer back it's a gigantic red flag for me that I fucked up something along the way. If a text goes unanswered I just let it be and call her a couple of days later. If she picks up there is still a good chance I can get back in, if she doesn't it's pretty much gg right there. In most cases I'd keep the number around and try again after a couple of weeks but that has a really, really low success chance. Texting again after a text went unanswered is equivalent to shooting yourself in the foot tho. =P
Well we had hung out quite a bit. Made out at her place several times lunch and stuff. So when she didnt respond i was a bit worried. And she responded almost immediately but then never responded. Its finals week atm and she goes back home for 2.5 weeks.
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EPT
