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Dating: How's your luck? - Page 131

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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
ROOTFayth
Profile Joined January 2004
Canada3351 Posts
April 28 2013 18:54 GMT
#2601
On April 28 2013 05:46 Grumbels wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 28 2013 05:17 evanthebouncy! wrote:
On April 28 2013 04:51 heishe wrote:
Had a date with a girl on thursday. She wants to watch horror movies with me tomorrow. Don't chicks do that if they want to get close and make out?

it's a good way for a girl to gauge if you can give her safety

maybe she just likes horror movies?

nobody really likes horror movies lolol
McBengt
Profile Joined May 2011
Sweden1684 Posts
April 28 2013 19:02 GMT
#2602
I got a weird sense of arousal watching The Ring. Still trying to figure that one out.
"My twelve year old will out-reason Bill Maher when it comes to understanding, you know, what, uh, how to logic work" - Rick Santorum
heishe
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Germany2284 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-28 22:29:35
April 28 2013 22:00 GMT
#2603
On April 28 2013 11:06 r.Evo wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 28 2013 05:46 Grumbels wrote:
On April 28 2013 05:17 evanthebouncy! wrote:
On April 28 2013 04:51 heishe wrote:
Had a date with a girl on thursday. She wants to watch horror movies with me tomorrow. Don't chicks do that if they want to get close and make out?

it's a good way for a girl to gauge if you can give her safety

maybe she just likes horror movies?

Always assume that anything the girl you're into does is because she is trying to seduce you.

-Calling back quickly? - She couldn't resist you.
-Calling back late? - She tried to play hard to get.

-Wants to watch horror movie? - Needs a reason to get close.
-Wants to watch comedy? - Wants to find out if your humor is similar to hers.

Throw those assumptions her way with not the most serious attitude and much fun is to be had. =D


Yeah, the second date's over now and literally nothing happened. We didn't even come close to touching, even though I was constantly setting up for it. except for the hug when I left where she wished me a safe way home and asked me to maybe contact her again in the future (you're German, she said "kannst dich vielleicht ja mal melden"), which sounds pretty negative to me.

Otherwise in terms of signals, I don't know how to interpret all the stuff she told me. She made an effort to generally talk about past acquaintances a lot (a lot of stories like "this time I met this guy...") and made a lot of references to her looks and her weight, and how much sport she does and how she lost so much weight losing this and that diet (she's got a pretty fit body but is on one of those girly "I need to look like Germany's Next Top Model" runs) like she wanted me to judge her. Usually these are positive signals given by an insecure person, but then she's the most outgoing and (seemingly) confident person I've ever met. Also she said a ton of shit that directly contradicted that, e.g. once she described this guy and listed a bunch of characteristics that she liked and then said she was totally turned of by him after they kissed first. Anyways, of those characteristics literally all (10 or so) were exact opposites of me.

Dunno, gotta figure out a way to get a clear signal via text messages, cause I don't really want to waste any more time and money in real life, but I really like her personality [and looks] (I don't really get anything out of the "getting to know random persons" thing). I figure straight out asking is fine but this probably nets me negative points if she is in fact into me (just asking her on a third date won't work since I know she's looking for platonic friends as well. She'd just say yes to have some fun and not be bored).
If you value your soul, never look into the eye of a horse. Your soul will forever be lost in the void of the horse.
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
April 28 2013 23:03 GMT
#2604
It's up to you to make things happen. Less analyzing (internal) more acting (external). "Setting up touching her" sounds creepy as fuck. Just box her when she says something dumb, pet her head when she's trying to be cute or tip/box her when you're trying to get her attention.

In terms of topics I personally like brushing away fishing for compliments either rather rough (She's talking about how she lost weight? Muster her and ask "Are you sure?", smile afterwards) or rather soft ("Are you really trying to fish for compliments here? Do you really think you need that?" - smile!). None of what you mentioned are "signals". Not so confident, definitely, but it's not classy rapport seeking behaviour either.

Talking about past acquaintances is, from my experience, more of a inexperienced way of screening the other side and/or trying to establish value by insecure people. However, you're not there to talk about her ex-hookups. Think of those stories as a bridge to what you want from her. The example you mentioned with her being turned of by him after they first kissed - dirty smile into "What turns you on when a guy kisses you?" ~ That's the type of emtional response you're looking to evoke. It doesn't really matter what you're talking about as long as you manage to evoke strong emotions.

Might as well keep dating her and work on the way you act around her, she won't be the last and she's certainly not the best. It's your job to make clear signals, it's her job to not come off as "too easy". Easiest ways to judge if/how much she is attracted in a real conversation (if you really don't get it) is to make horrible jokes or check for approval seeking behaviour.

PS: "I don't want to spend more money"? What exactly did you do..?
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
B.I.G.
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
3251 Posts
April 29 2013 03:46 GMT
#2605
Only talking about other dudes? Shit man, that doesn't sound promising..
WombaT
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Northern Ireland25773 Posts
April 29 2013 04:33 GMT
#2606
On April 28 2013 19:13 McBengt wrote:
Careful Grumbels, your oozing masculinity may just lead me to foist my affections on you rather than Wombat.

Fuck, damnit. I'll do that series of erotic photos I promised you, honest!
'You'll always be the cuddly marsupial of my heart, despite the inherent flaws of your ancestry' - Squat
Danglars
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States12133 Posts
April 29 2013 04:54 GMT
#2607
It's up to you to make things happen. Less analyzing (internal) more acting (external). "Setting up touching her" sounds creepy as fuck. Just box her when she says something dumb, pet her head when she's trying to be cute or tip/box her when you're trying to get her attention.

Still working on that crap. It does not come easy.

I'm getting better at not just doing the beta-compliment from afar treatment, and upping the light teasing and interest-seeking further than I usually go. Like saying "Are you sure?" if somebody is clearing fishing for a compliment. Can't wait to try something of that nature instead of a bland comment. I guess I'm really saying that my focus area is being a playful guy and charming. New girl in the my extended social circle seems very receptive, we'll see how it goes. Liked reading r.Evo's post, keep it up.
Great armies come from happy zealots, and happy zealots come from California!
TL+ Member
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-29 05:15:39
April 29 2013 05:15 GMT
#2608
On April 28 2013 16:24 KezseN wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 28 2013 15:55 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
On April 28 2013 15:27 Wojciech Zywny wrote:
I'm dating this one really hot girl. Well not exactly dating. She's just really hot so I look at her pictures on facebook and masturbate to them lol. I'm going to have sex with her IRL one day though












hahahahahaha nice reply to brighten up the thread

It made me laugh hahaha. This thread is like a combination dick waving thread and cry-on-shoulder thread , and this was a good way to lighten it up the latter part of this sentence.
User was warned for too many mimes.
Recognizable
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Netherlands1552 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-29 07:21:28
April 29 2013 07:18 GMT
#2609
Today is the day! Wish me luck.
I got good signals whilst I was whatsapping yesterday. I'm gonna go for it I don't drink, because it's bad mmmkay. However, I just might down a couple of beers tonight.
mcmartini
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Australia1972 Posts
April 29 2013 07:22 GMT
#2610
On April 29 2013 03:54 ROOTFayth wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 28 2013 05:46 Grumbels wrote:
On April 28 2013 05:17 evanthebouncy! wrote:
On April 28 2013 04:51 heishe wrote:
Had a date with a girl on thursday. She wants to watch horror movies with me tomorrow. Don't chicks do that if they want to get close and make out?

it's a good way for a girl to gauge if you can give her safety

maybe she just likes horror movies?

nobody really likes horror movies lolol

I love horror movies actually my favorite genre. Old and trashy. New and disgusting what ever. My mates new gf loves them as well.
I just want to say I have 370 APM - Liquid'Tyler SotG 14-12-2011 "I mean it's too bad you can't be paid to be, you know, a chicken shit fucking whiny bitch on the internet or we would have lots of rich community members" Nick "Tasteless" Plott
McBengt
Profile Joined May 2011
Sweden1684 Posts
April 29 2013 07:57 GMT
#2611
On April 29 2013 13:33 Wombat_NI wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 28 2013 19:13 McBengt wrote:
Careful Grumbels, your oozing masculinity may just lead me to foist my affections on you rather than Wombat.

Fuck, damnit. I'll do that series of erotic photos I promised you, honest!


I've already fedex'd the pink robocop mankini.
"My twelve year old will out-reason Bill Maher when it comes to understanding, you know, what, uh, how to logic work" - Rick Santorum
Rollin
Profile Joined March 2011
Australia1552 Posts
April 29 2013 07:57 GMT
#2612
What does "whatsapping" mean? Google is no help...?
Throw off those chains of reason, and your prison disappears. | Check your posting frequency timeline: http://www.teamliquid.net/mytlnet/post_activity_img.php
rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-29 08:12:29
April 29 2013 08:02 GMT
#2613
In terms of topics I personally like brushing away fishing for compliments either rather rough (She's talking about how she lost weight? Muster her and ask "Are you sure?", smile afterwards) or rather soft ("Are you really trying to fish for compliments here? Do you really think you need that?" - smile!). None of what you mentioned are "signals". Not so confident, definitely, but it's not classy rapport seeking behaviour either.


Yes brushing them away is good. Another thing is turning it around as her trying to please you.
Example:
F "I lost weight"
M "Cool, I like you better now " Imo, it's very different than "you look good" or even worse "you were already beautiful".
or
"For me ? :D" If she responds negatively it doesn't really matter... however if she's confused or something that's a good sign.

Or in case you guys are on the way to victory and sexuality is already somewhat there, you can go with a bolder line like:
"If you continue like this, I'll have to kiss you" (and leave it there, don't start drooling -.-)

I guess you get the idea. The main problem with a bland comment is that they are... bland. They don't create anything. Instead be playful and funny as you said.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
Recognizable
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Netherlands1552 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-29 10:49:53
April 29 2013 10:13 GMT
#2614
On April 29 2013 16:57 Rollin wrote:
What does "whatsapping" mean? Google is no help...?


Instant messaging? http://www.whatsapp.com/
WalkinDead
Profile Blog Joined February 2013
88 Posts
April 29 2013 20:22 GMT
#2615
girl has boyfriend. girl is annoyed with her boyfriend

Me cares about said girl.

Me wants girl, but doesn't want to ruin the seemingly deteriorating relationship between them already.

ug.

rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-04-29 22:07:37
April 29 2013 22:05 GMT
#2616
A girl whining about her boyfriend means shit.

Let her deal with her own relationship, find one of your own. You can flirt a little with her meanwhile and if you're still into her when she breaks up you can move on it.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
aTnClouD
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Italy2428 Posts
April 29 2013 22:26 GMT
#2617
On April 30 2013 05:22 WalkinDead wrote:
girl has boyfriend. girl is annoyed with her boyfriend

Me cares about said girl.

Me wants girl, but doesn't want to ruin the seemingly deteriorating relationship between them already.

ug.


beta as fuck
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g64/hunter692007/kruemelmonsteryn0.gif
McBengt
Profile Joined May 2011
Sweden1684 Posts
April 29 2013 23:03 GMT
#2618
Good thing we have Cloud here, ain't nobody as alpha as this motherfucker. He is like the starcraft version of The Fonz, just being near him pretty much guarantees you at least a blowjob.
"My twelve year old will out-reason Bill Maher when it comes to understanding, you know, what, uh, how to logic work" - Rick Santorum
isaachukfan
Profile Blog Joined October 2011
Canada785 Posts
April 30 2013 01:20 GMT
#2619
On April 30 2013 07:26 aTnClouD wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 30 2013 05:22 WalkinDead wrote:
girl has boyfriend. girl is annoyed with her boyfriend

Me cares about said girl.

Me wants girl, but doesn't want to ruin the seemingly deteriorating relationship between them already.

ug.


beta as fuck

Truth spoken from the master!
I'm a mennonite, yes I'm allowed to use a computer
Recognizable
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Netherlands1552 Posts
April 30 2013 18:54 GMT
#2620
It went well. We'll see where this progresses. Now I really need to study.
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