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this is jus hilarious
<Mendo> lmao there's a wicked lookign spider on my monitor and if i move the mouse around he chases after it
<spitfire> haha mendo
<spitfire> take a screen shot
<spitfire> wait
<spitfire> that made no sense
the pirates one rules too 
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LOL...Man I was reading those while on the phone with customer's at work, and I just started busting out laughing a couple times. I am so going to get fired rofl...
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haha not bad..sickoflife their suppose to be funny.
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<superwoman> I had a boyfriend once that made me suck him off while I had a mouthful of beer.
<GrandCow> HAHAHAHA that was me bitch!
<superwoman> DANNY?!?!?!
<GrandCow> MOM?!?!?!?!
lol
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<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK
<tatclass> er.
<tatclass> hi.
<andy\code> A common typo.
<tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.
(from bash.org top 100 quotes or something)
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[edit]Im gonna add all quotes i find funny at bash.org if anyone cares to read (if u'd rather spend 2 hours reading through sucky quotes, just pm me and ill stop)
#111338 +(6962)- [X]
<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...
<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything
<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.
<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "
<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls
<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"
<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.
<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.
<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.
<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang
<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.
<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.
<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<
<i8b4uUnderground> d-_-b
<BonyNoMore> how u make that inverted b?
<BonyNoMore> wait
<BonyNoMore> never mind
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those were great yes thank you for posting them
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I hadn't seen them... thanks, I laughed hard
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Bill307
Canada9103 Posts
Hunter, why didn't you just post these links, since most/all of your quotes are from them:
http://www.bash.org/?top
http://www.bash.org/?top2
And then, in addition to the links, post the 2% of your quotes that are not from bash.org's top 200?
Instead of citing the quotes that everyone sees because they're in the top 200, why not cite quotes that aren't up there but still great anyway?
Examples:
Edit: I see TLnet doesn't display anything between < and > if it's just letters =/.
#106358
< Pizza|> anyone know of some good mp rpgs
< kessel> RL is good
< Pizza|> whats rl ?
< kessel> Real Life
< Pizza|> link ?
#136365
<+Jenda_away> javascript:OpenPortalContentWin(110714,%20400,%20550,%20'110714_dragracer.swf',%20'DragRacer%20v2');
<@contagious> Not sure that link is gunna werk;]
<+Jenda_away> www.javascript:OpenPortalContentWin(110714,%20400,%20550,%20'110714_dragracer.swf',%20'DragRacer%20v2');.com
<@contagious> lol
<@contagious> That one either
<+Jenda_away> hmm
<+Jenda_away> fuck you
#283097
< Sabdo> So I went into my school's band room for the first time today
< Sabdo> Biggest bunch of nerds I've ever met.
< Sabdo> and this one girl walks in, really hot,
< Sabdo> and I swear to fucking god,
< Sabdo> three kids pulled out inhalers
#343937
< BlackAdder> no, because ds told me that building a comp is like putting together lego
< BlackAdder> and then i went and tried putting lego together to see
< BlackAdder> and i cut my finger
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<MercyBeat> 15. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN FOREST, RUN!"
oh my god ROFL
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Sweden33719 Posts
<_kr4m3r> so many fucking criminals, its bullshit
heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die
and showed up like 50yrs later like, "sup?"
whatd u think they'd say?
something along the lines of, "G`Day mate"
KING
So we were supposed to have a guest speaker in one of my classes
to talk about diversity and racism and shit today
prof's never met him..
in walks this super black gangsta ghetto dude
he's got a 'pimp' chain around his neck, wearing FUBU everything
has a gold watch and a ring on each finger, smells like pot and beer
he even had a do-rag on and a cigarrette tucked behind his ear
walks in in true rapper style flashing his crazy ghetto signs at us
the prof's like...'are you... jeff?'
he goes 'true dat, ho' and says 'you all my niggaz!' and he turns in a circle
waving his arms in the air singing about 'niggaz in 'da house' or some shit
so she tells him to give his speech on diversity and shit
and he starts talkin about 'the man' and how 'white folk be dissin'
then like a minute later this other black dude runs in dressed in a suit
and says 'sorry I'm late'
it turns out the first black dude was just baked. he doesn't even go to college
he just wanted to buy weed in the dorms
King 2 :D
Wow bash is great ^____^;;
Sorry just had to post those two :O
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Sweden33719 Posts
On August 26 2004 14:52 KiLLme1st- wrote:
LOL...Man I was reading those while on the phone with customer's at work, and I just started busting out laughing a couple times. I am so going to get fired rofl...
HEHE Bash.org material almost :O
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Sweden33719 Posts
my friends number at home is JUG-CHAT
i tease her abou tit
er
<`TroLL> you know when its time to jerk off when the vice cities hookers are turning you on
god religion makes me sick
yep
amen
i had like 4 leonardo action figures because my parents couldn't tell the difference when buying them
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Bill once again its just for a good laugh some people haven't heard of bash.org which is like one of the best sites in the world wewt
errrmm  but its funny so I grant you funny thx.
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LOL long time since i laughed this much especially at those Harry Potter-quotes :D
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LMAO. I think this one wins it for the funniest conversation. I laughed my freakin heart out:
(JHawk111420) Hey whats up, a/s/l?
(Lady Renegade) more than you want, I'm sure
(JHawk111420) ill take that as a challenge ;-)
(Lady Renegade) take it any way you want sweetie
(JHawk111420) k, how old are ya?
(Lady Renegade) probably too old for you, but let's pretend I'm 20 
(JHawk111420) k, what do ya look like?
(Lady Renegade) before or after I'm dressed up?
(JHawk111420) both :-D
(Lady Renegade) well......after I'm dressed up, I have long sexy red hair, nails painted red to match the slinky dress I have on, stiletto heels, pouty lips, green eyes, boobs out to here, and a smile that stops
traffic
(JHawk111420) and before your dressed up?
(Lady Renegade) before I'm dressed up, I'm bald and wearing boxers...sometimes my weenie is peeking out
(Lady Renegade) hello?
(Lady Renegade) hello?
(Lady Renegade) hello ....
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heheh, i go to bash.org pretty much everyday at its like a never ending supply of hilarity
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EPT
