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I try.... creative writing

Blogs > Clbull
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Clbull
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United Kingdom1439 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-10 02:18:31
September 10 2011 02:09 GMT
#1
In my quest to find out if I am actually good at anything, I have tried several things both related and unrelated to SC2 and found out I am not really good at any of them. Today I wish to try my hand at creative writing and see if I can actually be any good at that.

A small story I wrote, about a fictional MMORPG:

It was the semi-finals of the second annual world championship, Rushblade stepped in the arena ready to face his opponent. Dubbed the newcomer and dark horse of this tournament, he was a pretty good Assassin player, whom had disembowled his previous opponents almost effortlessly to make his way to the round of 4.

However, the opponent he faced was the previous champion, a man who had also effortlessly defeated those who stood in his way to reach the semi-final. However, this man whose name was Surge was a Wizard player and one of the scariest players of his class ever seen. In fact, he was so scary that almost everybody had bet that he would take the game in the first minute.

You see, Wizards are incredibly powerful because they were capable of incredible crowd control and single target burst capable of felling any opponent who engages unprepared. They were only weak in terms of area of effect but it didn't matter because they would force their opponents into defensive play else instagib them. Furthermore, the metagame for Wizard v Assassin was so broken that Wizards often won the match if they didn't make a huge mistake in control. One would have been stupid to make a bet on Rushblade over Surge.

Also, Surge obtained the nickname after the ability he often used as a nuke. He also developed the Full Nuke spec, a metagame defining spec that was deemed unbeatable at the time for Assassin players, which he played in every Wizard vs Assassin match.

As the countdown began for the match, many people anticipated a first minute knockout from Surge, because Assassins had limited defensive options and could only absorb so much burst, What they didn't know was that the upcoming match was about to blow their fucking mind.

The countdown hit 0. Both players entered the arena. Surge ran straight up to Rushblade and began casting his nuke ability, Surge, hoping to force Rushblade on the defensive.

But wait, he didn't try to vanish away and prevent the target from being cast. "What the hell is he thinking?" thought the crowd.

But then, just as Rushblade entered melee range and the cast was split seconds from finishing, Rushblade used Split, and split himself into four unidentifiable clones. Split was an ability that was normally neglected for being weak and hard to control, but Rushblade knew what he was doing.

With masterful controi, he teleported himself and all of his clones simultaneously around Surge and began to slash away at him. While the clones could not deal damage themselves, he could, and because he could control the clones so well, it wasn't obvious which one was his.

Surge continued to try and nuke each opponent, but for every cast, Rushblade either interrupted if it was focused towards him or just let it cast and kill a clone if it was targeted at his clone. At the same time, he recasted Split after several clones were sniped.

He then tried crowd controlling each clone but each time, Rushblade just recasted Split and further denied him a kill. He was totally unprepared for his tactic and could not counter it, because his spec did not account for any area based damage.

After two and a half minutes of being repeatedly stabbed by upto eight copies of Rushblade at a time, Surge fell. The crowd was speechless. Rushblade had caused the greatest upset in the tournament, felling the previous champion in a previously thought 'unwinnable' matchup.

Rushblade had redefined the metagame by countering the full nuke spec with mirror images of himself. He was going on to the finals.

***
intotheheart
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada33091 Posts
September 10 2011 02:32 GMT
#2
Sounds kinda like Bisu vs. sAviOr.

Good read.
kiss kiss fall in love
Talin
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Montenegro10532 Posts
September 10 2011 02:35 GMT
#3
The only logical follow-up here is a chapter about imbalance whining on forums.
intotheheart
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada33091 Posts
September 10 2011 02:36 GMT
#4
On September 10 2011 11:35 Talin wrote:
The only logical follow-up here is a chapter about imbalance whining on forums.

Made my day.
kiss kiss fall in love
jeeeeohn
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States1343 Posts
September 10 2011 02:43 GMT
#5
A lot of it is just telling, not showing. Writing is about subtlety and description. I'm no master author, but I do write a lot.

For instance, instead of: "He was totally unprepared for his tactic and could not counter it, because his spec did not account for any area based damage."

Maybe write something like (keep in mind you would have already described what everything looked like): "Rushblade evaporated in a wisp of yellow smoke like a wink of sunlight. The crowd was ecstatic, calling for blood. His clones were still dancing their death-waltz blinking about Surge and casting their unnatural inky shadows over the arena floor. To the Wizard's credit he held his ground, whispering feverishly the dragonic words that harnessed the elements, his robes cutting against the clones' harmless strikes and the crisp wind that smelled of stale sweat. A fine veil of powdery sand had been blown up by Surge's repel spells, energy surging across and rattling the arena floor beneath Rushblade's feet. The assassin balanced delicately to twist the shadows and stay enshrouded. He thought he saw the glint of a fireball peering through the sand and blinked away.
Now's the time.
And Rushblade zipped to Surge's blindside, dagger poised."


idk, that's what I came up with. You're on the right track though, keep at it!


If you can't jam with the best, then you have to slam with the rest.
intotheheart
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada33091 Posts
September 10 2011 02:45 GMT
#6
On September 10 2011 11:43 jeeeeohn wrote:
A lot of it is just telling, not showing. Writing is about subtlety and description. I'm no master author, but I do write a lot.

For instance, instead of: "He was totally unprepared for his tactic and could not counter it, because his spec did not account for any area based damage."

Maybe write something like (keep in mind you would have already described what everything looked like): "Rushblade evaporated in a wisp of yellow smoke like a wink of sunlight. The crowd was ecstatic, calling for blood. His clones were still dancing their death-waltz blinking about Surge and casting their unnatural inky shadows over the arena floor. To the Wizard's credit he held his ground, whispering feverishly the dragonic words that harnessed the elements, his robes cutting against the clones' harmless strikes and the crisp wind that smelled of stale sweat. A fine veil of powdery sand had been blown up by Surge's repel spells, energy surging across and rattling the arena floor beneath Rushblade's feet. The assassin balanced delicately to twist the shadows and stay enshrouded. He thought he saw the glint of a fireball peering through the sand and blinked away.
Now's the time.
And Rushblade zipped to Surge's blindside, dagger poised."


idk, that's what I came up with. You're on the right track though, keep at it!





Personally (just my 2 cents) I felt that you had a bit too much detail on everything. The battle is supposed to be intense and fast-paced, which although you do achieve, it certainly takes a while to get to the delivery. I think the poets of olde said that "Less is more," and you want to have your writing style actually reflect on what's going on.
kiss kiss fall in love
jeeeeohn
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States1343 Posts
September 10 2011 02:49 GMT
#7
On September 10 2011 11:45 IntoTheheart wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 10 2011 11:43 jeeeeohn wrote:
A lot of it is just telling, not showing. Writing is about subtlety and description. I'm no master author, but I do write a lot.

For instance, instead of: "He was totally unprepared for his tactic and could not counter it, because his spec did not account for any area based damage."

Maybe write something like (keep in mind you would have already described what everything looked like): "Rushblade evaporated in a wisp of yellow smoke like a wink of sunlight. The crowd was ecstatic, calling for blood. His clones were still dancing their death-waltz blinking about Surge and casting their unnatural inky shadows over the arena floor. To the Wizard's credit he held his ground, whispering feverishly the dragonic words that harnessed the elements, his robes cutting against the clones' harmless strikes and the crisp wind that smelled of stale sweat. A fine veil of powdery sand had been blown up by Surge's repel spells, energy surging across and rattling the arena floor beneath Rushblade's feet. The assassin balanced delicately to twist the shadows and stay enshrouded. He thought he saw the glint of a fireball peering through the sand and blinked away.
Now's the time.
And Rushblade zipped to Surge's blindside, dagger poised."


idk, that's what I came up with. You're on the right track though, keep at it!





Personally (just my 2 cents) I felt that you had a bit too much detail on everything. The battle is supposed to be intense and fast-paced, which although you do achieve, it certainly takes a while to get to the delivery. I think the poets of olde said that "Less is more," and you want to have your writing style actually reflect on what's going on.


Well, you're right, but I think my overall point was made.
If you can't jam with the best, then you have to slam with the rest.
Clbull
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United Kingdom1439 Posts
September 10 2011 02:52 GMT
#8
On September 10 2011 11:43 jeeeeohn wrote:
A lot of it is just telling, not showing. Writing is about subtlety and description. I'm no master author, but I do write a lot.

For instance, instead of: "He was totally unprepared for his tactic and could not counter it, because his spec did not account for any area based damage."

Maybe write something like (keep in mind you would have already described what everything looked like): "Rushblade evaporated in a wisp of yellow smoke like a wink of sunlight. The crowd was ecstatic, calling for blood. His clones were still dancing their death-waltz blinking about Surge and casting their unnatural inky shadows over the arena floor. To the Wizard's credit he held his ground, whispering feverishly the dragonic words that harnessed the elements, his robes cutting against the clones' harmless strikes and the crisp wind that smelled of stale sweat. A fine veil of powdery sand had been blown up by Surge's repel spells, energy surging across and rattling the arena floor beneath Rushblade's feet. The assassin balanced delicately to twist the shadows and stay enshrouded. He thought he saw the glint of a fireball peering through the sand and blinked away.
Now's the time.
And Rushblade zipped to Surge's blindside, dagger poised."


idk, that's what I came up with. You're on the right track though, keep at it!



You're right. In retrospect, I felt like I approached it from the wrong angle.
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