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Ask an autistic - Page 3

Blogs > IskatuMesk
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keit
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
1584 Posts
March 29 2011 11:47 GMT
#41
How do you feel about the fact that your condition will continue to deteriorate with the way you're dealing with it currently?

With the inevitable death of your grandmother do you have any hopes of continuing to live?

What is your outlook on the future, would you have considered going into some kind of privatized rehabilitation if you had the money?
For example there's a guy I knew who has a 'similar' condition (schizofrenic) but he had great support from his rich parents so he could afford a specialized rehabilitation clinic which helped him somewhat, do you have any hopes what so ever that the terrible public healthcare will be able to help you in the end?
Graphics
Body_Shield
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada3373 Posts
March 29 2011 12:24 GMT
#42
I've been in not that great physical condition since I went to University and College, I've been trying to get back into shape and it's been really difficult (thankfully I gain weight very slowly, and I've been eating less generally). Recently I've been doing the odd home workout and I think I've been thinking more positively and feeling better about things in general. I've gotten more motivation to actually do things I want to do as well.

Maybe you could try some more physical activity as well, try a bunch of options, don't bother with things that are boring. Doing squats, situps and the like while watching TV is a decent start point I think, that's what I did/am doing.

I need a training partner for martial arts and I know no one in this damn city!
So, five-card stud, nothing wild... and the sky's the limit
keit
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
1584 Posts
March 29 2011 12:29 GMT
#43
On March 29 2011 21:24 Body_Shield wrote:
I need a training partner for martial arts and I know no one in this damn city!


Just hit up a martial arts club, there's usually lots of people training there so not having a trainer partner to start with is no problem, you train as a group and everyone is everyone elses training partner, atleast when I trained it was like that.
Graphics
57 Corvette
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Canada5941 Posts
March 29 2011 12:43 GMT
#44
Were you picked on in school, or did no one care that you were autistic?
Survival is winning, everything else is bullshit.
Body_Shield
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada3373 Posts
March 29 2011 12:55 GMT
#45
On March 29 2011 21:29 keit wrote:
Just hit up a martial arts club, there's usually lots of people training there so not having a trainer partner to start with is no problem, you train as a group and everyone is everyone elses training partner, atleast when I trained it was like that.

All that's around is the arrogant version of Brazillian Ju-Jitsu, and mixed martial arts guys. There is a kung-fu place though, but it might be a "McDojo"

Anyway, physical health is highly connected to mental health, if you feel good, you think good.
So, five-card stud, nothing wild... and the sky's the limit
TabyLing
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
Australia69 Posts
March 29 2011 13:10 GMT
#46
On March 29 2011 13:05 IskatuMesk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 29 2011 13:02 Saechiis wrote:
Don't you think you'd be happier if you didn't act like you're a victim of life?

Also, doesn't "I'll never find someone compatible with me anyways" sound like a bail-out to not have to try and expand your comfort zone? As an autist surely you know that's statistically bullshit

Not trying to be an asshole btw, you just sound like you've given up and I think a more optimistic approach to life would be helpful


Eh. I hear this every now and then. I lived optimistically a long time ago but I figured that optimism is just the road to disappointment. As long as you expect disappointment you can't be disappointed, right? (unless something really catches you off guard, like sc2's engine... but sometimes you just can't prepare I guess.)

I don't like to think of things statistically. Again, that raises expectations. I can't say to myself, "well statistically speaking this could happen". I'm setting myself up for major fail if I do that. I've done it too many times.

So, yeah. I've given up.


Is being dissapointed, or hurt, really such a bad thing?
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
March 29 2011 15:12 GMT
#47
On March 29 2011 20:47 keit wrote:
How do you feel about the fact that your condition will continue to deteriorate with the way you're dealing with it currently?

With the inevitable death of your grandmother do you have any hopes of continuing to live?

What is your outlook on the future, would you have considered going into some kind of privatized rehabilitation if you had the money?
For example there's a guy I knew who has a 'similar' condition (schizofrenic) but he had great support from his rich parents so he could afford a specialized rehabilitation clinic which helped him somewhat, do you have any hopes what so ever that the terrible public healthcare will be able to help you in the end?


1 - It used to bother me but I learned to live with this knowledge. You can't afford to let these things scare you. You live day by day and take things as they come. You can't make plans for this or that because they are never what you expected.

2 - No, I don't. I just have to hope nothing happens before I am able to finish my work here.

3 - No, I have no desire to bother. All associations with people and the health care have ended negatively and there's no reason to think that there could be any other outcome. I accepted this a long time ago. I wish I was rich. If I was rich all of life's problems would melt away, yes? Ah, if only...

On March 29 2011 21:24 Body_Shield wrote:
I've been in not that great physical condition since I went to University and College, I've been trying to get back into shape and it's been really difficult (thankfully I gain weight very slowly, and I've been eating less generally). Recently I've been doing the odd home workout and I think I've been thinking more positively and feeling better about things in general. I've gotten more motivation to actually do things I want to do as well.

Maybe you could try some more physical activity as well, try a bunch of options, don't bother with things that are boring. Doing squats, situps and the like while watching TV is a decent start point I think, that's what I did/am doing.

I need a training partner for martial arts and I know no one in this damn city!


I don't get why people think exercise magically makes you feel better. On multiple occasions I took this advice and did regular gym work. It only made me feel worse. I always found it unbearably boring as well. Yes, I've done the whole exercise with music/tv/ect. routine as well as the scheduled gym routine. In one last effort to prove this theory right I bought weights a year ago and forced myself into a regular weight lifting routine. Nothing big, just to get start. Well, it was the same old story as the others. It just doesn't work for me bro.

On March 29 2011 21:43 57 Corvette wrote:
Were you picked on in school, or did no one care that you were autistic?


I was harassed nearly daily in both grade school and high school. Only during the last year of high school, after I had gotten into a number of physical confrontations, did I have days of on and off peace. School was horrible. People didn't know/care I was autistic. Just the mere fact I was "different" singled me out. My grade school was full of physical violence as a result from my temper being tested time and time again. Junior high was me forcing myself into a mental shell and sleeping the world away as it did all it could to destroy me. Senior high was just a depressing nothingness with no purpose or meaning. Schools, at least public schools, seem so utterly pointless to me.

On March 29 2011 22:10 TabyLing wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 29 2011 13:05 IskatuMesk wrote:
On March 29 2011 13:02 Saechiis wrote:
Don't you think you'd be happier if you didn't act like you're a victim of life?

Also, doesn't "I'll never find someone compatible with me anyways" sound like a bail-out to not have to try and expand your comfort zone? As an autist surely you know that's statistically bullshit

Not trying to be an asshole btw, you just sound like you've given up and I think a more optimistic approach to life would be helpful


Eh. I hear this every now and then. I lived optimistically a long time ago but I figured that optimism is just the road to disappointment. As long as you expect disappointment you can't be disappointed, right? (unless something really catches you off guard, like sc2's engine... but sometimes you just can't prepare I guess.)

I don't like to think of things statistically. Again, that raises expectations. I can't say to myself, "well statistically speaking this could happen". I'm setting myself up for major fail if I do that. I've done it too many times.

So, yeah. I've given up.


Is being dissapointed, or hurt, really such a bad thing?


Yes. Disappointment leads to the train stopping dead in its tracks and all things related to a total crash and burn. Life up to this point has been a string of disappointments after disappointments. I'd much prefer to stop being disappointed by expecting things that won't happen/work out.

I made plans to mod Sc2. Sc2 turned out into the worst-case scenario for custom content. Engine is horrible. Editor was rushed out last-minute. No mod or campaign support, only heavy-handed map support. My expectations for sc2 were that it was going to suck but at least it would be workable. I expected too much out of Blizzard. I was greatly disappointed. Three years of plotting and planning a total waste of time. It was best I just continued my work elsewhere and made my judgement before making plans in an anticipation of this or that happening. I worked myself up for nothing. Colossal waste of effort and time and left me feeling nothing but bitter.
MisterD
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Germany1338 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-29 15:20:14
March 29 2011 15:18 GMT
#48
i'm curious: did you ever watch house md.? does that series appeal to you?

/edit: Also, what is it you think you can do the best of all things?
Gold isn't everything in life... you need wood, too!
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-29 15:28:25
March 29 2011 15:26 GMT
#49
On March 30 2011 00:18 MisterD wrote:
i'm curious: did you ever watch house md.? does that series appeal to you?

/edit: Also, what is it you think you can do the best of all things?


Never watched it, no sir. I don't really consistently watch anything. The last, most recent series I watched was babylon 5 a few years ago. Even if something appeals to me I have a very hard time sticking to it. Be it movies or tv series or even reading, which I did quite used to enjoy a decade back, I can't force myself to stick to them. It's something I would like to see in the future if I ever understand what the hell is wrong with me and figure out how to defeat it.

The best of my abilities? My writing and design. I feel writing is the most important foundation for any and all ventures of media. I have spent my entire life building my worlds and all of my custom content or media projects have been based on them one way or another. Whether it's to entertain, to get a message across, or just to translate thoughts into life, my writing is nothing special but it's the strongest of my talents by far.

Next to that would be my voice acting and sound engineering. I find all that malice and anger I have built into my head can be formed into a potent voice for villains. I seem to know just what to say and when to say it to inspire the greatest emotional response. Do you find that ironic? You should. In fact, that should be the greatest irony of them all. I can't communicate with people properly but I know how to stir their hearts...
Divinek
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
Canada4045 Posts
March 29 2011 16:12 GMT
#50
I found it very interesting reading through your Q & A actually. At first I figured it was just the typical anti social person trying to make excuses for something, but as I read more and more answers to questions it started to make sense. The way you answered standard questions about future social prospects and stuff exemplifies exactly how I would imagine a person with autism would look at them.

Thanks for taking the the time out to answer all this stuff
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
Oh goodness me, FOX tv where do you get your sight? Can't you keep track, the puck is black. That's why the ice is white.
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
March 29 2011 16:48 GMT
#51
I hope you find the answers insightful in some way.
Body_Shield
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada3373 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-29 17:12:23
March 29 2011 17:07 GMT
#52
The negativity burns into my very soul.

Also, how much does it enrage you if people are late or don't do something they say they'll do.

I am just annoyed mostly, I used to be a lot worse. I ask because I heard some things about that somewhere.
So, five-card stud, nothing wild... and the sky's the limit
Sulli
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
Canada236 Posts
March 29 2011 17:07 GMT
#53
Have you ever had, or considered having a pet? Just wondering if you could use the companionship without having to deal with the human interaction. Of course you'd have to feed it and clean up after it, so I guess I'm not sure if it's the best idea if you're not into long term commitments.
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
March 29 2011 17:12 GMT
#54
On March 30 2011 02:07 Body_Shield wrote:
The negativity burns into my very soul.

Also, how much does it enrage you if people are late or don't do something they say they'll do.

I am just annoyed mostly, I used to be a lot worse.


Late... depends. Usually it just annoys me. When people don't do stuff they say they'll do it drives me insane. I had this happen a lot in wc3 and just decided to drop the entire concept of teams for projects and work on a process of outsourcing to people I know well. I figure that if you aren't 100% sure you aren't going to be able to do something then you should say that. Saying you're going to do something and then not doing it is just making people expect something that won't come. It's a pox upon modders. I am responsible for too much of this myself.

On March 30 2011 02:07 Sulli wrote:
Have you ever had, or considered having a pet? Just wondering if you could use the companionship without having to deal with the human interaction. Of course you'd have to feed it and clean up after it, so I guess I'm not sure if it's the best idea if you're not into long term commitments.


I have two cats right now.
Body_Shield
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada3373 Posts
March 29 2011 17:43 GMT
#55
I knew a guy in highschool similar to you, he seemed like a nice enough guy, I never really got to know him (different classes etc etc) even though we were both teacher's kids.

It's kind of depressing, the social perceptions of mental illness (for lack of a better term); socially people treat it really similarly to an infectious disease pre-modern medicine. I'm not quite sure how that could be changed either with the stigmas today.

You shouldn't give up on the health care system, the outcome might always look negative, but they need someone to really push on them before they do something. (Unfortunately that's also the case with every government organization in Canada.) I know it's probably annoying and shit to call them or go in and ask over and over again, but it's exactly the same for them, and you can last longer.
So, five-card stud, nothing wild... and the sky's the limit
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
March 29 2011 17:47 GMT
#56
On March 30 2011 02:43 Body_Shield wrote:
I knew a guy in highschool similar to you, he seemed like a nice enough guy, I never really got to know him (different classes etc etc) even though we were both teacher's kids.

It's kind of depressing, the social perceptions of mental illness (for lack of a better term); socially people treat it really similarly to an infectious disease pre-modern medicine. I'm not quite sure how that could be changed either with the stigmas today.

You shouldn't give up on the health care system, the outcome might always look negative, but they need someone to really push on them before they do something. (Unfortunately that's also the case with every government organization in Canada.) I know it's probably annoying and shit to call them or go in and ask over and over again, but it's exactly the same for them, and you can last longer.



Believe me, it took over a year of work just to get an appointment at all. Even just getting disability was a lot of work. They intentionally make it as difficult as possible.
Body_Shield
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada3373 Posts
March 29 2011 17:56 GMT
#57
I think there's a little of "only people who actually need help will put themselves through this gauntlet of paper" and a helping of "don't really want to do work".

I'm sure there are people who really care and want to help, but it only takes a few dicks to screw up the system.
So, five-card stud, nothing wild... and the sky's the limit
orotoss
Profile Joined September 2010
United States298 Posts
March 29 2011 18:21 GMT
#58
Why would I find someone compatible with me? I think that is more foolish to consider. A social retard like me walks outside and into a bar...? Well, I guess that would be a good way to end up in a situation you've never encountered before. In a bloody heap on the side of the road, in jail, or somewhere in Mexico a week later with no pants and no recollection of your past life.


Person A: Parties are important to me for social occasions and having fun.
Me: More like waking up in a puddle of puke and feeling a hangover for the rest of the day.


I feel like your views on social parties and alcohol are very biased, perhaps due to media portrayals of these things, especially considering that you have "never even considered touching drugs or alcohol." There is nothing wrong with choosing to live a non-social life and avoiding alcohol, but you should not do so out of a biased resentment towards parties/alcohol. I'm not saying you should go out to a bar and get drunk but at least understand that friends can get together to socialize and have a drink without waking up in a puddle of puke with a hangover.
BLARRGHGHH
IskatuMesk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada969 Posts
March 29 2011 18:48 GMT
#59
Everyone is biased from their own perspective. Everyone I know personally or off-hand who was involved in alcohol in any way was destroyed by it, including my grandmother's ex-husband. Some people will tell me, "lol moderation", but I don't trust anyone, much less myself, to take anything in moderation.
-Frog-
Profile Joined February 2009
United States514 Posts
March 29 2011 18:56 GMT
#60
What are the chances that this is actually an elaborate writing experiment and that you aren't actually autistic/don't have social problems etc? I'm not trying to demand proof of who you are and your condition but as you are surely aware you can be whoever you want on the internet and as an author it seems probable that this could be a character you have created.
powered by coffee, driven by hate.
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