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I've been "on my own" for almost the past 5 years, everything is fine with my parents. I had moved out because I got engaged waaaay to early but that is a completely different story, the point is I've had my fair share of roommates as it is pretty hard to sustain your own place at 18. Every roommate was better than my ex up until I let my best friend move in and he takes the cake for the worst one yet.
The Annoyances
He is an absolute slob, in the ~8 months he has been here he hasn't taken out the trash once and had mowed the lawn once when I asked him to because I was in California for my brothers wedding. However since blocking my xbox's internet he hasn't really been down in the family room to make a mess. He thinks the xbox is broken or something and for now I'll let him choose to believe it; thank god I don't play on Live really anymore.
I'll wake up in the morning only to realize the cereal and Milk is in his locked room because he had the munchies late at night. I also had to clean the living room/kitchen almost weekly due to him just not picking up after himself/friends. We got about 8 inches of snow and for whatever reason he did not shovel his parking space, instead parked in someone else's which led them to my door asking him to move. Which he did and now parks on the street, however I absolutely hate being noticed like that and it looks pretty bad on my part.
Additionally, I generally wake up around 5am to head into work early; however lately he has had people over every other week from like 11pm-???, which keeps me up letting me only get about an hour worth of sleep before work. I tell him the next day every time but after a week he must forget, not care, or think they can actually be quiet.
The Girlfriend
It started off as just an annoyance when he got a GF about 8 months ago and she was loud, if you know what I mean. It wasn't all bad as my music would drain out all the sounds but when I streamed and used headphones it would come through; which is why I bought myself a snowball microphone, I guess that was a blessing in disguise because I absolutely love this Mic. However, he cheated on her several months ago and I was the one that told her because I don't stand for that stuff at all; which put me in the middle of a sethstorm of drama for a few months. It ended just before the GSL when she came over to pick up her stuff. Which I felt obligated to go in his room and help her and talk to her for about 2 hours. Not only did he never tell me she was coming, he didn't apologize/thank me afterwards. I've been single for the past 3 years just so I don't ever have to deal with this drama; just waiting for people to mature up. I got all the crappy end of a relationship without getting laid; talk about a lose-lose situation.
"Slacker"/Closing
So about 3 months ago he had got laid off his job. Never told me the reason, I only assume he ditched work one to many times to get laid. Seriously, he is like a Charlie from "Two and a Half Men" except without any money. But he was my best friend and pretty much the only person I talk to that lives remotely close, so I told him he could stay and continue with rent when he got a job; this was just before I found out he cheated, and got into "the wrong crowd". Three months go by and he finally just got another job as the host of Applebee's where all his friends work. However, he did say he would pay rent this month but seems to be spending all his money on miscellaneous things so *hopefully* he doesn't have the ~$500 and I have a legitimate reason for telling him to leave other than I don't enjoy living with him. He's a cool guy but it still needs some sort of parental authority which I don't enjoy. There's a few more things but that is stuff that definitely doesn't belong on a public forum.
The Ending, or is it?
Well if you are still reading it means you generally had a good time; so <insert expletive deleted here> you for getting joy off my misery. I don't know why I posted this, probably just so come the 15th when he doesn't have rent I have the balls to kick him out. And if he does have rent, I guess there's always next month. The good news is, if I cut back on eating out; I can pay my mortgage/bills.
Oh and be careful when letting close friends move in; they are the ones whom can walk all over you.
 
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That really sucks that he's not pulling his own weight  Hopefully, he'll be gone soon.
It'd be nice to kick him out for monetary reasons, so that you guys can still stay friends 
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one of my roommates actually moved out because he thought the other was going to kill him ><
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If you're telling him about your concerns, but he doesn't seem to care, he's a shitty friend.
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On February 03 2011 12:46 Roe wrote:
one of my roommates actually moved out because he thought the other was going to kill him ><
Haha yeah unfortunately I sound like Elmer Fudd, whom of which spent his entire life trying to kill a rabbit; doesn't give off the most threatening demeanor.
On February 03 2011 12:46 Karliath wrote:
If you're telling him about your concerns, but he doesn't seem to care, he's a shitty friend.
Indeed, he was my best friend. Still generally treat people how I'd like to be treated even if they don't.
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Make him read this.
Seriously, most roommate problems i see posted here are due to bad communication because people are afraid to make demands and keep on dreaming that the situation will change by itself.
So the best thing to do, in my opinion, is to have a serious and very sincere talk about it. Some guys just don't understand unless told in their face, so tell them.
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You never suspected this before he moved in?
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This sounds like a classic Brady Brunch episode.
In any case, I see no problems, these are all legitimate complaints except for this one: + Show Spoiler +However, he cheated on her several months ago and I was the one that told her because I don't stand for that stuff at all; which put me in the middle of a sethstorm of drama for a few months
Why would you even do that? That's his problem and his prerogative, you don't want to get in the middle of it, but then you make the moral decision to tell her. That's just asking for trouble mate and to be honest, it could have gotten a lot worst.
Lucky, lucky!
As for the roomate problem, I suggest moving out or finding someone new before you grow even more intolerant of your friend's problems and it causes problems in your relationship with him.
Hope this helps.
P.S: Love your show and commentating! (you make me feel better about my slight lisp [apparently I have one, I can't even tell in real life])
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Sorry to hear that. If you need a new room mate I will be it for you! This is Cool Voice Bro from your chat. :D.
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I can't believe you told his girlfriend he was cheating on her. That's not your business in the least.
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Pretty sure his roommate cheated on his girlfriend with him, which is why he had to be up and honest to her.
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So... What can't be posted on a public forum? I'm sure it's no worse than some of the other stuff I've seen on here.
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On February 03 2011 12:34 Ipp wrote:
However, he cheated on her several months ago and I was the one that told her because I don't stand for that stuff at all; which put me in the middle of a sethstorm of drama for a few months.
I really hope his name is Seth and this is a Freudian slip 
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On February 03 2011 13:40 Torte de Lini wrote:This sounds like a classic Brady Brunch episode. In any case, I see no problems, these are all legitimate complaints except for this one: + Show Spoiler +However, he cheated on her several months ago and I was the one that told her because I don't stand for that stuff at all; which put me in the middle of a sethstorm of drama for a few months Why would you even do that? That's his problem and his prerogative, you don't want to get in the middle of it, but then you make the moral decision to tell her. That's just asking for trouble mate and to be honest, it could have gotten a lot worst. Lucky, lucky! As for the roomate problem, I suggest moving out or finding someone new before you grow even more intolerant of your friend's problems and it causes problems in your relationship with him. Hope this helps. P.S: Love your show and commentating! (you make me feel better about my slight lisp [apparently I have one, I can't even tell in real life])
Completely disagree.
If you know about it, say it or it will drag on for months/years and it will only be worse as time goes on. Cheating is a despicable act and honestly he's doing his "friend" a favor by letting him live there, so if he doesn't want that stuff going down in his place than he can do something about it (which he did).
I hate the social stigma of "you shouldn't tell someone they're being cheated on". If someone gets pissed off because you ratted them out, tell them to go fuck themselves because you didn't do anything wrong. I feel bad about myself keeping those things secret and I'm not going to put myself through that feeling for an asshole who cares so little about his girlfriend that he cheats on her.
On topic, I've been living alone for 3 years because I can't stand roommates. Even the nicest people eventually degrade into people I want to hurt after living with them for a few months. The only roommate I ever liked was some exchange student from China who didn't speak much french (I'm french) and pretty much kept to himself in his own room. And even he was annoying sometimes! Always messed up the kitchen counter because he made rice in a rice cooker and put too much water 99% of the time so it spilled all over the place and he didn't wash it.
My only problem now is neighbours. I can't wait to have my own HOUSE instead of an apartment. Seriously, the guy who lives upstairs talks so loudly I can hear him through my earplugs or through my computer headphones with music blasting when I'm not sleeping at 1 AM... when he's on the PHONE! When people are there it's even louder. I really hate not having my own quiet place.
Roommates are always worse than neighbours too so yeah, I really don't want another roommate even if having my own apartment costs a ton. If I was forced to have a roommate for financial reasons, I would just declare bankruptcy or something because I can't live like that again.
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I had a roommate that was a really good friend and we roomed for a year in the dorms...wow did that turn out bad. His dad was a doctor, so he was a spoiled ass nigga. NEVER took out the trash. A lot of the girls in our dorm who also happened to be our friends knew about this and they tried to make him feel guilty enough to take it out himself by taking it out for him. He never budged. He also had a retarded habit of walking back in at 4 am (we shared a room). Having a roommate isn't a bad idea when you have a roommate agreement and can terminate the 'lease' when the agreement is breached. If your name is on the lease, then you can ask him to sign an agreement. I lived with a roommate for a year who was super cool and chill, we weren't "friends" but I mean we got along.
By the way, you don't have it as bad as girls do in college dorms...that's another story. LOL
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On February 03 2011 15:45 Kurr wrote:Show nested quote +On February 03 2011 13:40 Torte de Lini wrote:This sounds like a classic Brady Brunch episode. In any case, I see no problems, these are all legitimate complaints except for this one: + Show Spoiler +However, he cheated on her several months ago and I was the one that told her because I don't stand for that stuff at all; which put me in the middle of a sethstorm of drama for a few months Why would you even do that? That's his problem and his prerogative, you don't want to get in the middle of it, but then you make the moral decision to tell her. That's just asking for trouble mate and to be honest, it could have gotten a lot worst. Lucky, lucky! As for the roomate problem, I suggest moving out or finding someone new before you grow even more intolerant of your friend's problems and it causes problems in your relationship with him. Hope this helps. P.S: Love your show and commentating! (you make me feel better about my slight lisp [apparently I have one, I can't even tell in real life]) Completely disagree. If you know about it, say it or it will drag on for months/years and it will only be worse as time goes on. Cheating is a despicable act and honestly he's doing his "friend" a favor by letting him live there, so if he doesn't want that stuff going down in his place than he can do something about it (which he did). I hate the social stigma of "you shouldn't tell someone they're being cheated on". If someone gets pissed off because you ratted them out, tell them to go fuck themselves because you didn't do anything wrong. I feel bad about myself keeping those things secret and I'm not going to put myself through that feeling for an asshole who cares so little about his girlfriend that he cheats on her. On topic, I've been living alone for 3 years because I can't stand roommates. Even the nicest people eventually degrade into people I want to hurt after living with them for a few months. The only roommate I ever liked was some exchange student from China who didn't speak much french (I'm french) and pretty much kept to himself in his own room. And even he was annoying sometimes! Always messed up the kitchen counter because he made rice in a rice cooker and put too much water 99% of the time so it spilled all over the place and he didn't wash it. My only problem now is neighbours. I can't wait to have my own HOUSE instead of an apartment. Seriously, the guy who lives upstairs talks so loudly I can hear him through my earplugs or through my computer headphones with music blasting when I'm not sleeping at 1 AM... when he's on the PHONE! When people are there it's even louder. I really hate not having my own quiet place. Roommates are always worse than neighbours too so yeah, I really don't want another roommate even if having my own apartment costs a ton. If I was forced to have a roommate for financial reasons, I would just declare bankruptcy or something because I can't live like that again.
Social stigma? You're not even employing that right.
It's just none of your business and if you're aware of what's going on and feel the need to intervene, you talk to the friend and leave the decision up to him, not you. You don't intervene, get in the middle and cause trouble for your friend. If you truly stand by your morals and common courtesy, then you let the cards hit the table and let your friend get what's coming to him. He's lucky this girl wasn't outraged and maniacal. Can you imagine you being the girl and the friend tells you your boyfriend is cheating on you? Do you how much volume, audacity and sad that is? Case in point, sit down with the friend and tell him what you agree or disagree with and he can either confine with you his views, understanding or actions or he'll tell you to fuck off and to be honest, he has every right to do so. It's not a question of what he's doing is right or wrong, it's a question of what he is doing should not be of your concern or responsibility.
It's not social stigma by a long-shot. Mind your own business and let the friend deal with his own problems or weasel attitude. You're better than that, but you're also a respectable person who doesn't get into matters that don't concern him.
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i kicked out a roommate this summer. smoked way too much pot, smelled terrible, never showered blah blah. he had been there 3 weeks and i left him a note on his door explaining the situation. 3 more weeks went by with no change. it took 2 weeks more for me to get the nerve up to tell him to GTFO. 8 weeks of the worst smell, dirtiest kitchen ive ever seen
but now that he's gone i couldn't be happier with my roommates.
you gotta tell your friend what's going on, give him a change to clean up his act. if that change doesn't happen, well, then you gotta 86 him =\
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On February 03 2011 13:14 Pika Chu wrote:
Make him read this.
I've had talks with him that go into far more than I wrote here. It's good for a week but then reverts back.
On February 03 2011 13:40 Torte de Lini wrote:
As for the roomate problem, I suggest moving out or finding someone new before you grow even more intolerant of your friend's problems and it causes problems in your relationship with him.
I own the place, so unless I want to take a 50k loss and sell the place -- me moving is not an option.
On February 03 2011 14:32 Kakera wrote:
So... What can't be posted on a public forum? I'm sure it's no worse than some of the other stuff I've seen on here.
Just because you read it here doesn't mean it should of been here. Once something is out on the internet there is no way to remove it; I'm sure Day9 knows that by now with his airplane story.
On February 03 2011 13:47 Gatsbi wrote:
I can't believe you told his girlfriend he was cheating on her. That's not your business in the least.
The worst thing about being cheated on is finding out everyone knew but you. It's not like he cheated on her and I told; I had a talk with him which basically was do it again you tell her or I do. She would find out eventually; no matter how slick you are the person will find out eventually. We all would drink/play board games/watch TV together.
On February 03 2011 14:16 LazySCV wrote:
Did he plan to pay you back for those months where he didn't have money?
Off-topic: I talk just like you do! Are you all-American?
He is not paying me back, not part of the deal; was out of a job and I didn't think he would go down the wrong road. All he has to do is start paying rent.
Also, I am 3rd Generation Italian which pretty much means 100% American.
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On February 03 2011 17:20 Torte de Lini wrote:
Mind your own business and let the friend deal with his own problems or weasel attitude. You're better than that, but you're also a respectable person who doesn't get into matters that don't concern him.
Sorry, I disagree. Kurr had it spot on imo. The amount of disrespect he's showing his girlfriend for cheating... and especially if the OP is a friend to her... and your doing... nothing. I can't imagine not telling her if I was even remotely close to her. If my gf cheated on me, I would be very angry if someone informed me. Not at them, but at her. But if I found out myself, and everyone else knew... well, I'd probably make the channel 5 news. I would beg of you to tell me immediately, so I'm not wasting anymore of my time. I think it's all situational though, so I can see where your coming from.
On the roommate problem, I don't think there's really anything you can do. Some people have horrendous living skills, and are very stubborn to change. He seems lazy and unmotivated, making it all the harder. I'd keep on trucking and putting up with it, while looking for a replacement. I'm sort of going through the same thing right now.
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EPT
