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I quit my job at DirecTV three days ago.
I am 19 years old and left my house yesterday after an argument with my parents about going back to college. Just left. Took no clothes or money or ID. My last words to my dad were "fuck I'm an adult" and to my mother "I'm leaving" Its barely been 24 hours but I don't plan on going back for more than my money ID and some clothes.
Now I'm staying at my friends house with his wife and son trying to figure out what to do next. My best plan is to move to Florida to meet up with a hot girl I know then go traveling for a month or two and then get a job somewhere.
I know this is all stupid and a terrible plan and worse i know my parents just wanted what was best for me. But I'm more stubborn than a goat and I refuse to go back.
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I hope you don't regret this decision. :o
Best of luck though.
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United States24600 Posts
Quit job -> lose free housing at home -> travel for a month or two?
That progression doesn't make sense to me.
Why did you quit your job?
I can totally understand why you want to get the hell out of your house, but you need to do it in a more mature manner. I was patient and waited until I was 25 to move out despite them driving me crazy and I'm glad I did (but this was mostly for money reasons). Regardless, I moved out in an organized fashion.
Just to give you an idea of why I wanted to move out, whenever I'm in the same room as a family member my pulse ends up going up significantly due to the environment.
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you never want to leave the home on bad terms with your family... go back and make things right, if you still want to leave after that go ahead
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Yeah, I don;t honestly know I'm kinda hoping for someone here at TL to knock some sense into me sense I can't do it myself and nobody irl would say such things to me.
I quit my job because I was a subcontractor and my boss was telling me I was making tons of money and after two months of 40+ hours a week I only got $300.
I told my parents I wanted to quit and they said that was okay and that I was being treated unfair, we agreed I'd look for another job. The next day they pressured me to go back to College and I told them I wasn't going which led to the fight which lead to me leaving.
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United States24600 Posts
What are the pros and cons of going back to college?
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go to college its way easier than any other lifestyle except highschool, and theres a future in it.
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Pros: Further my education -- work towards a degree for a better future
Cons I don't believe there are cons in college asides from the time spent in classes that do nothing for your goals.
I have nothing against college its just not what I want to do. I wanted to get a normal minimum wage job like any other kid and make some money but that wasn't an option, to my parents.
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It sounds to me like you know you were wrong, you just don't to have to admit it to them.
You don't have to admit you were wrong about going back to college. No one enjoys arguments, and its definitely normal to get upset while arguing. Just tell your parents that you overreacted and that you're still frustrated from getting paid so little after working so hard. Then figure out what to do.
Nothing wrong with taking a vacation if you've got the time and money. Or if you want to get right back to work do that. Whatever you decide will be easier if you tell your parents before hand. Give them the opportunity to support your decision and you'll feel better about it, even if they end up disagreeing with what you've decided.
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United States24600 Posts
Get a minimum wage job: make shit money that can barely cover your expenses when you live extremely frugally.
College: lead into a job potentially that pays better than shit money and can cover your expenses.
What is it about the first choice that is appealing enough that you aren't interested in the second choice? I don't get why you think wanting to get a normal minimum wage job when college is an option is like any other kid.
If you have any job prospects that are better than minimum wage and don't require college then I'm not saying you shouldn't pursue those.
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Hyrule18992 Posts
Pros: college parties, girls, drugs, booze, a degree
Cons: shit ton of debt, frequent blackouts, and more debt
But seriously, I reallllly want to go back to college. A degree would make my life so much better. Abandoning your home and family, moving to another state to shack up with some chic, and being a vagrant really tends not to work out most of the time.
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On November 04 2010 08:07 micronesia wrote:
Get a minimum wage job: make shit money that can barely cover your expenses when you live extremely frugally.
College: lead into a job potentially that pays better than shit money and can cover your expenses.
What is it about the first choice that is appealing enough that you aren't interested in the second choice? I don't get why you think wanting to get a normal minimum wage job when college is an option is like any other kid.
If you have any job prospects that are better than minimum wage and don't require college then I'm not saying you shouldn't pursue those.
Honestly micronesia,
I don't know why I don't want o go to college, I went for a year and felt like I'm sure lots of bright students do going to school that I wasn't learning anything and wasting money.
One valid reason I tell myself is that I don't have a direction in life I need college for. As in, I don't know what I want to do career wise.. it's honestly one of the negative impacts sc has had on me ever since 2004 all I ever wanted to be was progamer or the next rekrul.
When I was in college i carried around a copy of super/system 2 and read it over and over.
that is the best I can say for that.
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always good to explore man, it probablly would be better to leave on good terms with your parents.. but I guess I don't know the whole situation. I'm 19 too, sounds kind of scary but go for it if your problems are that severe.. its always good to get out and experience something new anyway, you can always get back to studies anyway, you're young.... gl hf and get back to us about ur decision :D best of luck with all
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On November 04 2010 08:12 tofucake wrote:
Pros: college parties, girls, drugs, booze, a degree
Cons: shit ton of debt, frequent blackouts, and more debt
But seriously, I reallllly want to go back to college. A degree would make my life so much better. Abandoning your home and family, moving to another state to shack up with some chic, and being a vagrant really tends not to work out most of the time.
I read this and think.. "tends not to work out most of the time?" I'll be the exception to that. Even though I realize that I should take your point as extremely valid.
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On November 04 2010 07:53 micronesia wrote:
Just to give you an idea of why I wanted to move out, whenever I'm in the same room as a family member my pulse ends up going up significantly due to the environment.
I admire that you still manage to be in the same room as them. More then I can stand though.
OP - If you're not careful there's a very real possibility you'll end up on the streets. Takin two months off now sounds very dangerous. By all means go to Florida, but make sure you search for a job every day and that you put some real effort into it. If you have some good friends that you can rely on, that's great. But don't overstay your welcome. After five days you should be on the move again which should give you an idea of how urgent your situation is. Your friends are nice enough to let you stay there so do your best to get a grip and sort your life out.
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United States24600 Posts
As I mentioned before there is another option besides minimum wage job and college. Lots of people do reasonably well without a college degree. It's not an easy question for many to answer, but what can you do or get trained to do fairly easily that will work for you and actually be a decent job?
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On November 04 2010 07:53 micronesia wrote:
Just to give you an idea of why I wanted to move out, whenever I'm in the same room as a family member my pulse ends up going up significantly due to the environment.
I feel the same way.
I can be having a great day away from home, out with friends or even when I was at school. Then I come home and as I walk up the driveway I get the feeling of uneasiness. Then I'd walk into the house and someone would say something to me it could be
-where have you been?
-how was your day?
-how was Johan?
-what are you doing.
anything.
And I'd just instantly get mad and think that whoever was so stupid not worth my time to explain.
It was always just my home. If I went to other peoples houses similar things could happen but id have a normal social reaction.
My mom and dad I feel have been bearing down too much pressure on me since I was about 14. Or maybe thats just teenage angst but thats how I feel.
My household had 4 screaming less than 5 year olds. and a bunch of drama filled siblings on top of that if it counts.
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On November 04 2010 08:13 Xtal wrote:Show nested quote +On November 04 2010 08:07 micronesia wrote:
Get a minimum wage job: make shit money that can barely cover your expenses when you live extremely frugally.
College: lead into a job potentially that pays better than shit money and can cover your expenses.
What is it about the first choice that is appealing enough that you aren't interested in the second choice? I don't get why you think wanting to get a normal minimum wage job when college is an option is like any other kid.
If you have any job prospects that are better than minimum wage and don't require college then I'm not saying you shouldn't pursue those. Honestly micronesia, I don't know why I don't want o go to college, I went for a year and felt like I'm sure lots of bright students do going to school that I wasn't learning anything and wasting money. One valid reason I tell myself is that I don't have a direction in life I need college for. As in, I don't know what I want to do career wise.. it's honestly one of the negative impacts sc has had on me ever since 2004 all I ever wanted to be was progamer or the next rekrul. When I was in college i carried around a copy of super/system 2 and read it over and over. that is the best I can say for that.
I had the exact problem as you. Didn't know what i wanted to do for a career, felt like i was wasting money going to college for something i had no interest in, etc. All I can tell you is go and grind it out, or you'll regret it later (I know I do). Having even 1 year of college education to fall back on will save your ass in a dire situation.
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United States24600 Posts
Nah in my case my pulse is going up because of actual ridiculousness.... not just a learned overreaction. The intensity of the cross examinations and the tense atmosphere over the most unimportant things is enough to take years off of your life.
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As a 23 year old that's made all of the wrong choices, go back home and finish school. No matter the amount of success I've found outside of school, I still look back and regret not finishing, and I'm probably going to be taking classes next semester.
PM me if you want to talk more about things, but I honestly couldn't advise more strongly against what you're doing.
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so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck.
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On November 04 2010 08:27 fnaticAugury wrote:
As a 23 year old that's made all of the wrong choices, go back home and finish school. No matter the amount of success I've found outside of school, I still look back and regret not finishing, and I'm probably going to be taking classes next semester.
PM me if you want to talk more about things, but I honestly couldn't advise more strongly against what you're doing.
pm'd
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On November 04 2010 08:23 Xtal wrote:Show nested quote +On November 04 2010 07:53 micronesia wrote:
Just to give you an idea of why I wanted to move out, whenever I'm in the same room as a family member my pulse ends up going up significantly due to the environment. I feel the same way. I can be having a great day away from home, out with friends or even when I was at school. Then I come home and as I walk up the driveway I get the feeling of uneasiness. Then I'd walk into the house and someone would say something to me it could be -where have you been? -how was your day? -how was Johan? -what are you doing. anything. And I'd just instantly get mad and think that whoever was so stupid not worth my time to explain. It was always just my home. If I went to other peoples houses similar things could happen but id have a normal social reaction. My mom and dad I feel have been bearing down too much pressure on me since I was about 14. Or maybe thats just teenage angst but thats how I feel. My household had 4 screaming less than 5 year olds. and a bunch of drama filled siblings on top of that if it counts.
I am currently 23.
I was in a similar situation when I was 19, anything my parents said to me would practically set me off. The pressure they were putting on me annoying and also setting me off.
I ended up going to school out of state, spent 4 years there, just graduated this year. Only bad part of it is the student loans I accrued, so I have to delay moving out to pay them off, but its fine.
School was worth it, got good education, currently working at Microsoft. Still living with my parents because I want to pay off my loan first, but now that I have finished school and am working, and my future is more or less secure they have laid off me.
I still get angry when they ask what I think as "dumb questions", but whatever, they mean well, and the benefits I am getting by not moving out and saving makes it bearable.
If I were you i'd suck it up and stick with it, it gets better the older you get and the more you progress in college. Your parents may annoy you, but in the end they mean well. No point cutting off a source of support in your future life over that.
Sure you can go, get a shitty paying job and live somewhere that you probably will be fine with for now. But think about the future man, you are closing a lot of doors with your proposed actions.
Almost everyone I know who has not finished school and moved out early, regrets it. One of my friends who did so, is currently moving back in with his parents just so he can go back to school, because he is tired of working dead end jobs.
It's your life man but, my advice is put up with your parents, go to school, they only mean the best for you and want you to succeed. I know when I was 19, I thought I had shit figured out, but trust me... you do not have shit figured out x_x.
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I know when I was 19, I thought I had shit figured out, but trust me... you do not have shit figured out x_x.
That
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On November 04 2010 09:09 fnaticAugury wrote:Show nested quote +I know when I was 19, I thought I had shit figured out, but trust me... you do not have shit figured out x_x. That
Just quoting that again. It's very important to think about that. I remember I said the exact same thing at 19, but after some rough patches and under paying jobs, I just took my parents advice and went to college - for lack of a better idea mind you.
Believe me you have good parents if they are urging you to go to college. Find an easy, non-stressful job and go to college. It is a lot of fun - you can take classes and get interested in subjects you never even knew about and there are always tons of cute girls you can meet to pass the time. I'm in a professional degree program and am still loving it.
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Not sure how much money you have saved up but quitting your job, leaving home, and deciding that the first thing you should do is going to Florida to meet a hot girl for a few month doesn't really inspire confidence (aka it sounds like a terrible plan).
If I were serious about moving out and never going back home, I'd be looking for a cheap place to live at and focused on finding a job to pay rent/the bills rather than moving out to a friend's house and blowing all my money on girl and vacation.
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Judging college on one single year, particularly freshman year isn't really a fair analysis. Unfortunately, gen eds really water down the experience of early college, and the feeling of "not learning anything" is rather common. However, even if you don't learn anything, the promise of higher future wages should be incentive enough to finish it.
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Good Luck whatever happens :S
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when does the semester in college start? or can you just go back whenever you want ?
what about traveling before you go back to college? when you have enough money saved up (if you do not have any save ups, how do you want to travel anyway?) and go back to college afterwards i guess your parents are fine with it.
well, there is still the problem that you don't want to go to college. (even tho it's fucking awesome, best time of my life) I totally understand your parents, what do you see in a minimum wage job that is so great? What about another form of education? I think there are some possibilites except college where you don't end in a minimum wage job.
Anyway, leaving your parent's house the way you did sucks. I mean, the didn't do anything bad to be honest. I know how you feel, but when you're out of the house your relationship to your parents gets so much better so fast. When I left my parent's house it was exactly the same. But after some time out of the house I totally love being there for holidays and so on. Or even they visiting me. It's an awful bad idea to fuck up the relationship to your parents. really.
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Please go back to your parent's place and set things right.
Also, if you don't have a set plan in life and your parents provide for you, GO TO COLLEGE.
You yourself are expensive (food, clothes, insurance, among many other bills) and the unspoken debt you owe your parents for what they had done for you is immeasurable. Did they take care of you all your life just for you to waste life on a minimum paying job? You'll regret it. The only reason you say that is because your parents are providing for you right now. This romantic dream of yours of traveling out, seeing the sights, meeting a hot girl are just that - a dream.
Plus, would you rather drastically change what your life CAN be or bow your head and admit to a single tantrum that'd blow over in less than a day? that's like blowing a red light at a busy intersection when you know you can hit the brakes...
Go back and immediately apologize to your parents. Ask them for forgiveness (they will) and set your life straight from a point where you CAN. Ain't no fucking way you'll get anything more than newspapers as your blanket and park bench for a bed if you decide to be a stubborn little kid on this issue.
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On November baller wrote:
so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck.
This. You sound like the most ungrateful person i have ever met literally i can’t fathom why people do this to their mother a women who had you inside her for 9 month! A dad who dint sexual abuse you or beat your ass like so many other bum dads out there and all what they want is for you to try and learn for a bit not for their sakes but for your own person future and all you can say is going to see a hot chick in Florida!
Man I love my parents thank god I respect and honour them for what they have done for me and never speak rude or belittle them even if i don’t agree with them sometimes, and I hope you do to and see the errors of your ways my fellow TL member.
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On November 04 2010 07:50 Xtal wrote:
Just left
No. Whatever you do...just no.
Never do that shit on your parents.
Do what ever you like - whether it´s something stupid or wise - but please don´t just leave.
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IMO you fucked up. Go home, set things right with your fam jam. Becoming a minimum wage drifter isn't going to do much for you.
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Move out and go to college in another state. Get away from your parents while developing your ability to make $$$. I hate my family too but being far away from them makes it much more manageable. I moved out when I was 16 and I have never regretted it or wanted to go back home, but you will regret not going to college.
Nobody learns anything in their first 2 years of college, just enjoy the parties. It's junior/senior year when things really get interesting/tough.
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I love Aphex's Xtal. My parents stopped giving me any money after they joined sect, and I went to court and won case, and I did it all because I wanted to end university (and becouse it was healthy to bring my parents back to life which worked halfly). So. School is not only key to knowledge but also it shapes way of thinking, go back to it, cheers.
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the unspoken debt you owe your parents for what they had done for you is immeasurable.
This is in my opinion a very strange and troublesome argument... It's sort of implied when you decide to have kids that you're gonna take care of them, not only as part of social convention but of underlying biological imperative.
There's no debt. If someone is cruel enough to want their parents to suffer, that cruelty is product of mental torture at worst and neglect at best. What you raise is what you get, if you've failed to show and encourage love, expect to get none back.
I love my parents to bits, for all their best and for all their flaws - without them i wouldn't be me and i'm happy being who i am. ^^ Not everyone does/is though and parents/guardians are always to blame.
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On November 04 2010 09:39 DISHU wrote:Show nested quote +On November baller wrote:
so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck. This. You sound like the most ungrateful person i have ever met literally i can’t fathom why people do this to their mother a women who had you inside her for 9 month! A dad who dint sexual abuse you or beat your ass like so many other bum dads out there and all what they want is for you to try and learn for a bit not for their sakes but for your own person future and all you can say is going to see a hot chick in Florida! Man I love my parents thank god I respect and honour them for what they have done for me and never speak rude or belittle them even if i don’t agree with them sometimes, and I hope you do to and see the errors of your ways my fellow TL member.
I probably have a weird outlook on this but...
I don't see it as you have to be "grateful" that your parents raised you/pay for your shit/wiped your shit when you're young. IMO it's part of every parent's responsibility to at least raise their children to 18 and at least pay for the bare essentials so I hate it when people spew out lines like "Your mother carried you in her womb for 9 months!"
If they didn't want to pay for my basic living expenses for 18 years, they should of had an abortion or wore a condom (I'm pretty sure like 90% of people's birth aren't planned). Ditto for carrying me for 9 months, no one held a gun to your head, you CHOOSE to do it. Yes I am aware that there are tons parents who abandon their kids all the time or don't pay child support or abuse their kids etc but thats pretty much I feel about it.
Not like I hate my parents or anything, but I've pretty much heard "You need to take care of your parents when you're older because they took care of you when you were young" line ever since I was like 4 (I'm Chinese... so it might be an Asian thing). Or better yet "If I didn't have you I can just work 6 months out the year and thats it" to which I just retort in my head "well if you used a fucking condom instead of having sex willy nilly then we wouldn't be discussing this".
I mean I'll pay and take care of my parents if they need money or when they retire in a heartbeat but don't turn it into one huge guilt fest. I'm not going to expect them to admire me and be thankful everyday when I pay for their retirement home/change their adult diaper. I'm not going to feed them lines like "If I didn't have to take care of you, then I can just take a vacation to korea to watch the GSL/Proleague finals every year". I'm not going to say "I changed your adult diapers for 9 months you should be grateful".
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On November 04 2010 11:01 crazeman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 04 2010 09:39 DISHU wrote:On November baller wrote:
so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck. This. You sound like the most ungrateful person i have ever met literally i can’t fathom why people do this to their mother a women who had you inside her for 9 month! A dad who dint sexual abuse you or beat your ass like so many other bum dads out there and all what they want is for you to try and learn for a bit not for their sakes but for your own person future and all you can say is going to see a hot chick in Florida! Man I love my parents thank god I respect and honour them for what they have done for me and never speak rude or belittle them even if i don’t agree with them sometimes, and I hope you do to and see the errors of your ways my fellow TL member. I probably have a weird outlook on this but... I don't see it as you have to be "grateful" that your parents raised you/pay for your shit/wiped your shit when you're young. IMO it's part of every parent's responsibility to at least raise their children to 18 and at least pay for the bare essentials so I hate it when people spew out lines like "Your mother carried you in her womb for 9 months!" If they didn't want to pay for my basic living expenses for 18 years, they should of had an abortion or wore a condom (I'm pretty sure like 90% of people's birth aren't planned). Ditto for carrying me for 9 months, no one held a gun to your head, you CHOOSE to do it. Yes I am aware that there are tons parents who abandon their kids all the time or don't pay child support or abuse their kids etc but thats pretty much I feel about it. Not like I hate my parents or anything, but I've pretty much heard "You need to take care of your parents when you're older because they took care of you when you were young" line ever since I was like 4 (I'm Chinese... so it might be an Asian thing). Or better yet "If I didn't have you I can just work 6 months out the year and thats it" to which I just retort in my head "well if you used a fucking condom instead of having sex willy nilly then we wouldn't be discussing this". I mean I'll pay and take care of my parents if they need money or when they retire in a heartbeat but don't turn it into one huge guilt fest. I'm not going to expect them to admire me and be thankful everyday when I pay for their retirement home/change their adult diaper. I'm not going to feed them lines like "If I didn't have to take care of you, then I can just take a vacation to korea to watch the GSL/Proleague finals every year". I'm not going to say "I changed your adult diapers for 9 months you should be grateful".
Especially after reading this, go back home and go back to school and be thankful that your parents want you to be better and educated with your life. There are plenty of parents who really don't care, but the fact that your parents didn't kick you out when you were 14 shows that they do care.
Rekrul's advice has always been not to follow him, it's a lot more work than you think it is. It's a lot more luck than you think it is. It's clearly a lot more dedication than you are willing to put in.
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That seems pretty childish to me lol.
Go get back all your stuff at least. Then you can hit the road and figure out what u gotta do.
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I'm a 28 year old who's made all the wrong choices.
I would say, if your parents will help you go to college, then great, don't waste it. But, if you go later, you could get more out of it. What's the hurry? If your parents are cool with it, why not work, save money, be mature and poor for a while, then go to college after you are sick of that? The older people in college are learning a lot more, wasting a lot less time, and more know what they want. The 18-19 year olds are 90% douches who only better their future if they luck into a degree that has a direct path to a job regardless of networking, actual skills, social ability, references, etc.
But you can be the 10% who does it right too, so if you go to college ASAP be serious about it, which means be bold getting advice from lots of people. A lot of professors will give you really good advice. Some will tell you to fuck off but seriously, be a weirdo and go to every professor's office hour, even in your first week as a freshman, just go and talk to them, tell them what you know about yourself and don't know, tell them what you want. If you want to leave college with your life set a certain way, u better get specific abuot it and informed about how to do it, don't think it's just a matter of choosing the right program and getting good grades, because it's not. Think about things like this: Will you be able to go to grad school? Will you be able to get an internship? A job lined up before you graduate? Have a handle on shit like this from day 1. If you don't know, don't graduate. Get more majors. Get minors. Whatever. Volunteer. Fill your resume up with cool stuff that you like to do, and if you don't know what that would be, then keep trying new things--boldly--against your comfort zone.
That's how u would win. Most ppl only figure this out later and maybe do it for 1-2 yrs. If you do it for 3+ you win... so just be bold, talking to every old adult on the campus. Hell, before you even enroll you can walk around a campus doing this. Office hours are posted. Just be like, hello, I'm thinking about coming here but I want some advice on how to get where I want to go. I know I'm only 19 but right now I'm thinking that I want to go through college so I can have a better job later on.
A lot of professors are going to have some shocking things to say about that. How college isn't just for that. They're going to tell you that this might not be your only goal, or they might tell you which programs are better suited for that. And I think they're right. by the time you graduate you will probably not feel the same way about learning, college, money, and your future. Of course you want those things too... but
Anyways, working a few years before college is fine, but parents tend to be lame about that... it's a shame. Hell I would go back to high school now if I could. I would learn a lot more from it now than I did then. After you're older you can get a lot more out of a lot of things. At 19 you should just be getting high and getting laid and buying xbox games IMO.
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@crazeman
There is a difference between being grateful and being obliged, I think you're referring to the latter. Personally, I'd try to put myself in my parents prespective. Would I be happy if my child grew up into an ungrateful bastard after I raised him/ her for 18+ years? I think not.
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On November 04 2010 08:03 Xtal wrote:
Pros: Further my education -- work towards a degree for a better future
Cons I don't believe there are cons in college asides from the time spent in classes that do nothing for your goals.
I have nothing against college its just not what I want to do. I wanted to get a normal minimum wage job like any other kid and make some money but that wasn't an option, to my parents.
Cons: these are like 80% of your classes...
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On November 04 2010 11:34 Sebby Lebby wrote:
But you can be the 10% who does it right too, so if you go to college ASAP be serious about it, which means be bold getting advice from lots of people. A lot of professors will give you really good advice. Some will tell you to fuck off but seriously, be a weirdo and go to every professor's office hour, even in your first week as a freshman, just go and talk to them, tell them what you know about yourself and don't know, tell them what you want. If you want to leave college with your life set a certain way, u better get specific abuot it and informed about how to do it, don't think it's just a matter of choosing the right program and getting good grades, because it's not. Think about things like this: Will you be able to go to grad school? Will you be able to get an internship? A job lined up before you graduate? Have a handle on shit like this from day 1. If you don't know, don't graduate. Get more majors. Get minors. Whatever. Volunteer. Fill your resume up with cool stuff that you like to do, and if you don't know what that would be, then keep trying new things--boldly--against your comfort zone.
That's how u would win. Most ppl only figure this out later and maybe do it for 1-2 yrs. If you do it for 3+ you win... so just be bold, talking to every old adult on the campus. Hell, before you even enroll you can walk around a campus doing this. Office hours are posted. Just be like, hello, I'm thinking about coming here but I want some advice on how to get where I want to go. I know I'm only 19 but right now I'm thinking that I want to go through college so I can have a better job later on.
A lot of professors are going to have some shocking things to say about that. How college isn't just for that. They're going to tell you that this might not be your only goal, or they might tell you which programs are better suited for that. And I think they're right. by the time you graduate you will probably not feel the same way about learning, college, money, and your future. Of course you want those things too... but
This is gold advice and something I was gonna post. I didn't do any of that shit and when I graduated, it's what I wish I did.
Seriously, college is for two things: you either get a job at the end, or you do research in whatever field interests you by taking even more school. Classes are just ways to weed out people who can't hack it. I don't think I've ever used anything I've learned in college at my job, I work in environmental engineering for the government, my coworkers have Ph.D's and MS degrees, and when it comes to on-the-job performance we're pretty much equal and none of it is based off of anything we ever learned in college.
So many people are thinking "Wahhhhh I don't what to do for a career?" You know why? Because they've never looked at a career! Have you ever interviewed someone in a field you were even remotely interested in? Walked a day in their shoes to see what it's like? That's the problem with a lot of majors, they assume "Oh well I like movies so I'll be a movie major and for a job I'll look at movies all day" and by the time job hunting comes around, they realize there's nothing like that. Instead of looking at the names of classes and determining whether or not Solid State Mechanics or Classic Poetry is what "really" interests you, get to know people at the career center. Try to set up informational interviews at companies so you know what jobs are actually out there and what people actually do.
That's why working before college is cool. You actually look for a job, you get a job, and then you realize what kinda jobs are out there and what prevents you from advancing so you know what to do to get ahead. But you can do all that shit in college too.
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Yet another person saying... Go back home and go to school. No matter what you end up doing in the end you will always have something to fall back on. Especially if you want a family, you want a good job because stressing over money on top of stressing over everything else is harrrrd.
TLDR: Put aside your own thoughts, feelings, and stubborness and listen to your parents and fellow TL members. Get your fucking ass back in school! 
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Not going to tell you what you should do as I doubt that helps. Besides, sometimes you just gotta figure it out on your own.
Will give some advice though. I don't have any experience with pro gaming so I won't get in to that but grinding out a living playing poker is hell of a lot harder than working a job or going to college. It takes vastly more dedication than reading a largely irrelevant poker book written 30 years ago. You think the people you are playing against haven't read Supersystems?
I'm not even going to mention that they'll have hundreds of thousands of hands of experience up on you. How are you going to overcome that? Are you supersmart? Because some of these people are.
Do you even have the bankroll to start? Do you even have an idea how much of a bankroll (thats money on top of living expenses) you need to play for your living?
I don't mean to burst your bubble but thinking you'll be the next Rekrul based purely on you reading SuperSystems is pretty delusional.
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On November 04 2010 11:15 Hikko wrote:Show nested quote +On November 04 2010 11:01 crazeman wrote:On November 04 2010 09:39 DISHU wrote:On November baller wrote:
so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck. This. You sound like the most ungrateful person i have ever met literally i can’t fathom why people do this to their mother a women who had you inside her for 9 month! A dad who dint sexual abuse you or beat your ass like so many other bum dads out there and all what they want is for you to try and learn for a bit not for their sakes but for your own person future and all you can say is going to see a hot chick in Florida! Man I love my parents thank god I respect and honour them for what they have done for me and never speak rude or belittle them even if i don’t agree with them sometimes, and I hope you do to and see the errors of your ways my fellow TL member. I probably have a weird outlook on this but... I don't see it as you have to be "grateful" that your parents raised you/pay for your shit/wiped your shit when you're young. IMO it's part of every parent's responsibility to at least raise their children to 18 and at least pay for the bare essentials so I hate it when people spew out lines like "Your mother carried you in her womb for 9 months!" If they didn't want to pay for my basic living expenses for 18 years, they should of had an abortion or wore a condom (I'm pretty sure like 90% of people's birth aren't planned). Ditto for carrying me for 9 months, no one held a gun to your head, you CHOOSE to do it. Yes I am aware that there are tons parents who abandon their kids all the time or don't pay child support or abuse their kids etc but thats pretty much I feel about it. Not like I hate my parents or anything, but I've pretty much heard "You need to take care of your parents when you're older because they took care of you when you were young" line ever since I was like 4 (I'm Chinese... so it might be an Asian thing). Or better yet "If I didn't have you I can just work 6 months out the year and thats it" to which I just retort in my head "well if you used a fucking condom instead of having sex willy nilly then we wouldn't be discussing this". I mean I'll pay and take care of my parents if they need money or when they retire in a heartbeat but don't turn it into one huge guilt fest. I'm not going to expect them to admire me and be thankful everyday when I pay for their retirement home/change their adult diaper. I'm not going to feed them lines like "If I didn't have to take care of you, then I can just take a vacation to korea to watch the GSL/Proleague finals every year". I'm not going to say "I changed your adult diapers for 9 months you should be grateful". Especially after reading this, go back home and go back to school and be thankful that your parents want you to be better and educated with your life. There are plenty of parents who really don't care, but the fact that your parents didn't kick you out when you were 14 shows that they do care. Rekrul's advice has always been not to follow him, it's a lot more work than you think it is. It's a lot more luck than you think it is. It's clearly a lot more dedication than you are willing to put in.
I'm not the OP FYI 
@crazeman
There is a difference between being grateful and being obliged, I think you're referring to the latter. Personally, I'd try to put myself in my parents prespective. Would I be happy if my child grew up into an ungrateful bastard after I raised him/ her for 18+ years? I think not.
I guess you're right about being gateful and obliged, but grateful for your mom carrying you in the womb for 9 months? I see it as more as "obliged" as soon as she decided to do it.
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You could always join the military
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On November 04 2010 12:12 crazeman wrote:Show nested quote +On November 04 2010 11:15 Hikko wrote:On November 04 2010 11:01 crazeman wrote:On November 04 2010 09:39 DISHU wrote:On November baller wrote:
so ur parents love u and want the best 4 u, they want u 2 go to college and they take care of 4-5 other kids as well as u. they've provided 4 u and fed u and housed u all this time. and u throw a temper tantrum bc "they pressure u" to do well in school or w/e and ur 19yo superplan is to meet up with some chick in florida and travel". sounds just like bill gates dropping out of harvard man good luck. This. You sound like the most ungrateful person i have ever met literally i can’t fathom why people do this to their mother a women who had you inside her for 9 month! A dad who dint sexual abuse you or beat your ass like so many other bum dads out there and all what they want is for you to try and learn for a bit not for their sakes but for your own person future and all you can say is going to see a hot chick in Florida! Man I love my parents thank god I respect and honour them for what they have done for me and never speak rude or belittle them even if i don’t agree with them sometimes, and I hope you do to and see the errors of your ways my fellow TL member. I probably have a weird outlook on this but... I don't see it as you have to be "grateful" that your parents raised you/pay for your shit/wiped your shit when you're young. IMO it's part of every parent's responsibility to at least raise their children to 18 and at least pay for the bare essentials so I hate it when people spew out lines like "Your mother carried you in her womb for 9 months!" If they didn't want to pay for my basic living expenses for 18 years, they should of had an abortion or wore a condom (I'm pretty sure like 90% of people's birth aren't planned). Ditto for carrying me for 9 months, no one held a gun to your head, you CHOOSE to do it. Yes I am aware that there are tons parents who abandon their kids all the time or don't pay child support or abuse their kids etc but thats pretty much I feel about it. Not like I hate my parents or anything, but I've pretty much heard "You need to take care of your parents when you're older because they took care of you when you were young" line ever since I was like 4 (I'm Chinese... so it might be an Asian thing). Or better yet "If I didn't have you I can just work 6 months out the year and thats it" to which I just retort in my head "well if you used a fucking condom instead of having sex willy nilly then we wouldn't be discussing this". I mean I'll pay and take care of my parents if they need money or when they retire in a heartbeat but don't turn it into one huge guilt fest. I'm not going to expect them to admire me and be thankful everyday when I pay for their retirement home/change their adult diaper. I'm not going to feed them lines like "If I didn't have to take care of you, then I can just take a vacation to korea to watch the GSL/Proleague finals every year". I'm not going to say "I changed your adult diapers for 9 months you should be grateful". Especially after reading this, go back home and go back to school and be thankful that your parents want you to be better and educated with your life. There are plenty of parents who really don't care, but the fact that your parents didn't kick you out when you were 14 shows that they do care. Rekrul's advice has always been not to follow him, it's a lot more work than you think it is. It's a lot more luck than you think it is. It's clearly a lot more dedication than you are willing to put in. I'm not the OP FYI Show nested quote +@crazeman
There is a difference between being grateful and being obliged, I think you're referring to the latter. Personally, I'd try to put myself in my parents prespective. Would I be happy if my child grew up into an ungrateful bastard after I raised him/ her for 18+ years? I think not.
I guess you're right about being gateful and obliged, but grateful for your mom carrying you in the womb for 9 months? I see it as more as "obliged" as soon as she decided to do it.
I think arguing over what we owe our parents is kinda OT; that would be a giant derailing argument... I for one would question what we "owe" to parents necessarily or what we "ought to be grateful for" and what that is really saying... but I don't think this is the place for that. I think this blog is about what's best for this guy... if he looks out for himself, I think that's best for him. If he puts some... effort towards "being grateful" or "paying back what's owed" to his parents, then that's potentially a sacrifice as opposed to a gain for him--it's not the right way to look at things to help him, unless you mean spiritually or something. I mean, you want him to get good karma or go to heaven or feel happier through treating his parents "right", then make the persuasive argument for it and maybe he will indeed have a better life.
Otherwise, I think the topic is about what this guy should do, i.e. go to school, live with friends, make up with his parents--for himself, not for them... not because "they're his parents", not because "they made him", not because "they paid for him for 18 years,"... etc. but because it's best for him, whatever that may be...
I'm not saying it's wrong to change the direction of the discussion cos its just a blog but I'm just wanting to make sure we are doing what's best for OP and not delving into theoretical arguments about morality and how children should treat parents etc. unless it's really what the OP needs.
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On November 04 2010 12:01 Scorcher2k wrote:Yet another person saying... Go back home and go to school. No matter what you end up doing in the end you will always have something to fall back on. Especially if you want a family, you want a good job because stressing over money on top of stressing over everything else is harrrrd. TLDR: Put aside your own thoughts, feelings, and stubborness and listen to your parents and fellow TL members. Get your fucking ass back in school!
Yep, quoted for truth.
That being said, I always listen to Steve Jobs' commencement speech for inspiration. However, he dropped out for concern and care for his parents, not out of bitterness for their overbearing attitude.
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EPT
