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Dissing in Starcraft

Blogs > TheKing.
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MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 07 2010 08:03 GMT
#1
So today was pretty typical, I woke up, got on my computer, and spent the rest of the day trying to log on to battle.net to see if the beta was back up. To my disdain, it was still down so i decided to play some xbox live, Modernwarfare 2 (please no hate, I apologize to everyone). While in a lobby, there was this guy who was talking trash. I am sure we have all heard this before. He was basically going off on some kid, calling him a noob and talking about how he couldn't get a kill without using painkiller. That isn't too bad of a diss but it got me to thinking.
I began to wonder what some of the best jokes or "disses" that one Starcraft player would say to another. I really haven't given it too much thought but some of the funnier ones i could think of were
Man, you are so bad that blizzard had to make a Iron Level of Ladder.
You're APM is lower than The average Twilight fan's IQ

Please feel free to post some of the best SC and SC2 jokes and please keep them clean (or use a spoiler" to ensure the life of this thread and that all may enjoy.

Thanks and Have fun-

"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
Lycaeus
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
United States1420 Posts
July 07 2010 08:07 GMT
#2
You're not good at Starcraft.
MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 07 2010 08:07 GMT
#3
On July 07 2010 17:07 Lycaeus wrote:
You're not good at Starcraft.

Owch, that kinda gets right down to it, haha
"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
dtnmang
Profile Joined April 2010
Vietnam752 Posts
July 07 2010 08:07 GMT
#4
Your Starcraft is worse than your grandma's.
KT Roflster - the lulziest team of Proleague.
Mortician
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Bulgaria2332 Posts
July 07 2010 08:08 GMT
#5
You win by doing stupid shit
You win by doing nothing
you gotta stake
Making Carriers, useful talent toi have
"If anything, the skill cap in sc2 is higher [than sc1] because there are a lot more things you can do at one given time. " darmousseh
ClanOverdosed
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
691 Posts
July 07 2010 08:09 GMT
#6
Dayum son, your building placement is worse than the leaning tower of Pisa
does that work?
Overdosed--www.overdosed.net
MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 07 2010 08:10 GMT
#7
On July 07 2010 17:09 Beloth(OD) wrote:
Dayum son, your building placement is worse than the leaning tower of Pisa
does that work?

yes sir, haha I like it
"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
Zhek
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
Canada342 Posts
July 07 2010 08:12 GMT
#8
it's true, carriers are a nice skill toi have.
Scaramanga
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Australia8090 Posts
July 07 2010 08:13 GMT
#9
Sir i believe that your vulture micro is sub par to the usual
Loda talked about the fun counter, it's AdmiralBulldog on his natures prophet
Atlare
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Australia893 Posts
July 07 2010 08:15 GMT
#10
On July 07 2010 17:13 Scaramanga wrote:
Sir i believe that your vulture micro is sub par to the usual

LOL.
Considering learning BW
keNn)
Profile Blog Joined February 2003
Philippines297 Posts
July 07 2010 08:17 GMT
#11
NTT, before the game in chat:"I hope you are wearing steel pants cuz my
dick is coming".
^_^
ClanOverdosed
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
691 Posts
July 07 2010 08:18 GMT
#12
Nice storms bro, your templars have worse aim than Dick Chaney
Overdosed--www.overdosed.net
ClanOverdosed
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
691 Posts
July 07 2010 08:18 GMT
#13
On July 07 2010 17:17 keNn) wrote:
NTT, before the game in chat:"I hope you are wearing steel pants cuz my
dick is cumming".


fixed
Overdosed--www.overdosed.net
MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 07 2010 08:20 GMT
#14
HAHa i am glad you "Fixed" it!
"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
Amnesia
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
United States3818 Posts
July 07 2010 08:34 GMT
#15
You play Protoss
M1.BoA
Profile Joined October 2009
Malaysia21 Posts
July 07 2010 08:35 GMT
#16
I can count how many times u won me with the stick in my pants.
MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 07 2010 08:41 GMT
#17
On July 07 2010 17:34 Amnesia wrote:
You play Protoss

Wow, that might be the meanest thing i have ever heard on any TL forum.
"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
Baksteen
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Netherlands438 Posts
July 07 2010 08:46 GMT
#18
My grandma has more APM then you
Derp Derp Derp
NrG.Bamboo
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
United States2756 Posts
July 07 2010 08:49 GMT
#19
On July 07 2010 17:35 M1.BoA wrote:
I can count how many times u won me with the stick in my pants.

What the shit does this mean?
I need to protect all your life you can enjoy the vibrant life of your battery
Mortician
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Bulgaria2332 Posts
July 07 2010 08:55 GMT
#20
On July 07 2010 17:46 Baksteen wrote:
My grandma has more APM then you


reminded me of Chill vs Combat-EX

"My grandpa has more apm than combat-ex, and not only he has arthritis but he is also dead"
"If anything, the skill cap in sc2 is higher [than sc1] because there are a lot more things you can do at one given time. " darmousseh
EvilTeletubby
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Baltimore, USA22253 Posts
July 07 2010 08:57 GMT
#21
Get educated kids...

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=38009
Moderatorhttp://carbonleaf.yuku.com/topic/408/t/So-I-proposed-at-a-Carbon-Leaf-concert.html ***** RIP Geoff
Endymion
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States3701 Posts
July 07 2010 09:17 GMT
#22
On July 07 2010 17:07 Lycaeus wrote:
You're not good at Starcraft.


Starcraft is the only game where this insult actually invokes anger, it's probably the most serious insult available for us..
Have you considered the MMO-Champion forum? You are just as irrational and delusional with the right portion of nostalgic populism. By the way: The old Brood War was absolutely unplayable
Baksteen
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Netherlands438 Posts
July 07 2010 09:29 GMT
#23
On July 07 2010 17:57 EvilTeletubby wrote:
Get educated kids...

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=38009


Thanks for that link, such epic yo momma jokes.
Derp Derp Derp
FuRong
Profile Joined April 2010
New Zealand3089 Posts
July 07 2010 09:35 GMT
#24
On July 07 2010 17:49 Valentine wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 17:35 M1.BoA wrote:
I can count how many times u beat me with the stick in my pants.

What the shit does this mean?


FYP
Don't hate the player, hate the game
EvilTeletubby
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Baltimore, USA22253 Posts
July 07 2010 09:38 GMT
#25
Make sure you read through the whole thread... the OP does NOT contain all of them. ^_^
Moderatorhttp://carbonleaf.yuku.com/topic/408/t/So-I-proposed-at-a-Carbon-Leaf-concert.html ***** RIP Geoff
KurtistheTurtle
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States1966 Posts
July 07 2010 09:40 GMT
#26
this method was introduced to me by the bnet public. kinda went like this

random guy in an obs game: red is salty
me: salty? whats that
friend: salty?
random guy: see that micro hes so salty
me: what?
friend: ?
random guy: haha red is salty

I still don't know what random guy actually meant by that but I think its freakin' hilarious. So describe whatever your opponent is doing as 'salty.' It's an insult, somehow, trust me.
“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears."
NevilleS
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada266 Posts
July 07 2010 10:38 GMT
#27
[your girlfriend] can suck a dick


**my dick
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
July 07 2010 10:43 GMT
#28
Ways to diss your opponent during/at the conclusion of a game:

"Great job. Are you proud of yourself?"
"God you're bad"

etc
eLiE
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada1039 Posts
July 07 2010 10:53 GMT
#29
lol, i remember going through 20 pages of that on the battlenet forums. even the mods were posting them. and i was going to mention combat-ex as well. i think asking someone to lose for you so you look like a good player is assuming the person you're play with is a dumbass, so that wins biggest diss for me.
How's the weather down there?
TelecoM
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States10671 Posts
July 07 2010 11:12 GMT
#30
lol ; this is great
AKA: TelecoM[WHITE] Protoss fighting
icystorage
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Jollibee19346 Posts
July 07 2010 11:39 GMT
#31
On July 07 2010 18:40 KurtistheTurtle wrote:
this method was introduced to me by the bnet public. kinda went like this

random guy in an obs game: red is salty
me: salty? whats that
friend: salty?
random guy: see that micro hes so salty
me: what?
friend: ?
random guy: haha red is salty

I still don't know what random guy actually meant by that but I think its freakin' hilarious. So describe whatever your opponent is doing as 'salty.' It's an insult, somehow, trust me.


or maybe... red sea is salty? =OOOOOO thus red = salty? im not sure if the red sea is salty tho lol
LiquidDota StaffAre you ready for a Miracle-? We are! The International 2017 Champions!
dogabutila
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States1437 Posts
July 07 2010 12:32 GMT
#32
On July 07 2010 19:53 eLiE wrote:
lol, i remember going through 20 pages of that on the battlenet forums. even the mods were posting them. and i was going to mention combat-ex as well. i think asking someone to lose for you so you look like a good player is assuming the person you're play with is a dumbass, so that wins biggest diss for me.


linklinklink!!
Baller Fanclub || CheAse Fanclub || Scarlett Fanclub || LJD FIGHTING!
Happy.fairytail
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States327 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 13:26:31
July 07 2010 13:25 GMT
#33
by far my favorite of all time: "f**king skilless newbie"

(from this: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=89880 )

Btw, anyone still have that thread of that fanfic with idra and tossigirl? lolol
Purind
Profile Blog Joined April 2004
Canada3562 Posts
July 07 2010 13:58 GMT
#34
I don't really insult people, but I have gotten into the habit of saying something along these lines:

When I win: "gg"
When I lose: "fucking skilless faggot/noobass"

If the winner is especially faggoty, I may start talking about how "Atleast I have a life" and how I'm not some poor loser that plays the game all the time, and while I'm at it I have to talk about my hot super model girlfriend and how I have sex with her 18 times a day
Trucy Wright is hot
Garm
Profile Joined June 2010
Norway222 Posts
July 07 2010 14:23 GMT
#35
On July 07 2010 22:25 Happy.fairytail wrote:
by far my favorite of all time: "f**king skilless newbie"

(from this: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=89880 )

Btw, anyone still have that thread of that fanfic with idra and tossigirl? lolol


Here you go: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=102411&currentpage=5#81

Now for some insults!

- My grandpa could've proxied better than that. And not only does he have enteritis, he's also dead. (Day[9], from Chill vs Combat-ex)

- Is this match rigged, or are you actually this bad?

- (After harassing him) Don't worry, you didn't need those probes anyway. You can't macro.

- I'm not calling you a noob. Calling you a noob would be an insult to all noobs.

- Judging by how you're playing, I'm impressed you even managed to install the game.

- If you were twice as good, you'd be a skilless fucking newbie.

- At your level, I'd suggest you don't waste your APM on excessive micro. Stick to the things you know and do well, like making pylons and typing "gg".

- I've seen players with better muta micro than you. One of them was a computer.
I didn't choose the Terran life. The Terran life chose me. Flash fan 2008 - eternity. FRB 2013! http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=321242
lone_hydra
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada1460 Posts
July 07 2010 15:07 GMT
#36
On July 07 2010 22:58 Purind wrote:
I don't really insult people, but I have gotten into the habit of saying something along these lines:

When I win: "gg"
When I lose: "fucking skilless faggot/noobass"

If the winner is especially faggoty, I may start talking about how "Atleast I have a life" and how I'm not some poor loser that plays the game all the time, and while I'm at it I have to talk about my hot super model girlfriend and how I have sex with her 18 times a day


I fucking hate that shit. I hate it when people type gg when they are winning. I get pissed off as hell. I think thats the worst insult. I love it when people insult me when they are losing, but when someone types gg... I just want to punch them in the face.

In summary, typing gg when you have a huge advantage is the worst insult ever.
Fav Gamers: 2)Stork 5)Bisu
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
July 07 2010 15:27 GMT
#37
"Your brain's about as useful as a scout."

"shut the fuck up and blow me" (I use this EVERYTIME someone pisses me off)

"umm... you do realize you have to take the reaver OUT of the shuttle, right?"
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
virpi
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Germany3598 Posts
July 07 2010 17:50 GMT
#38
my all-time favourite:

A: "gg"
B: "gg"
A: "you leave first!"
first we make expand, then we defense it.
TaaiJoeng
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Hong Kong164 Posts
July 07 2010 21:36 GMT
#39
On July 07 2010 19:38 NevilleS wrote:
[your girlfriend] can suck a dick


**my dick


My dick that is.
Lol, Chill vs Combat-ex.
...but the parasites say NO!
Saracen
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States5139 Posts
July 07 2010 21:40 GMT
#40
sexsexpussyhair
zerglingsfolife
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States1694 Posts
July 07 2010 21:45 GMT
#41
On July 07 2010 17:08 Mortician wrote:
You win by doing stupid shit
You win by doing nothing
you gotta stake
Making Carriers, useful talent toi have


HAHAHA. I understand everything so clearly now.
Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crown and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness.
Uranium
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States1077 Posts
July 07 2010 23:13 GMT
#42
On July 08 2010 00:07 lone_hydra wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 22:58 Purind wrote:
I don't really insult people, but I have gotten into the habit of saying something along these lines:

When I win: "gg"
When I lose: "fucking skilless faggot/noobass"

If the winner is especially faggoty, I may start talking about how "Atleast I have a life" and how I'm not some poor loser that plays the game all the time, and while I'm at it I have to talk about my hot super model girlfriend and how I have sex with her 18 times a day


I fucking hate that shit. I hate it when people type gg when they are winning. I get pissed off as hell. I think thats the worst insult. I love it when people insult me when they are losing, but when someone types gg... I just want to punch them in the face.

In summary, typing gg when you have a huge advantage is the worst insult ever.

Then they have succeeded in their attempt which is usually just to make you mad as hell. Do yourself a favor and ignore them.

Or as the internets would say, "Don't feed the trolls."
"Sentry imba! You see? YOU SEE??!!" - Sen | "Marauder die die!" - oGsMC | "Oh my god, she texted me back!" - Day[9]
SoLaR[i.C]
Profile Blog Joined August 2003
United States2969 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 23:30:10
July 07 2010 23:27 GMT
#43
Strangely enough, I use the same insult to both flame and respond to those flaming me:

GO BACK TO AMHERST AND GREASE DOWN YOUR SIDEBURNS YA DYKE
*typically spoken in a thick Boston accent*
Subversion
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
South Africa3627 Posts
July 08 2010 01:35 GMT
#44
gg blizzard
Achromic
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
773 Posts
July 08 2010 01:37 GMT
#45
Someone once said to me as he left the game room,

"Damn my girlfriend won't stop begging me to get boned."
Blah
shinosai
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States1577 Posts
July 08 2010 01:50 GMT
#46
Whenever your opponent retreats, referencing the trail of tears, while incredibly cruel, can be a pretty good diss.
Be versatile, know when to retreat, and carry a big gun.
eLiE
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada1039 Posts
July 08 2010 02:12 GMT
#47
On July 07 2010 21:32 dogabutila wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 19:53 eLiE wrote:
lol, i remember going through 20 pages of that on the battlenet forums. even the mods were posting them. and i was going to mention combat-ex as well. i think asking someone to lose for you so you look like a good player is assuming the person you're play with is a dumbass, so that wins biggest diss for me.


linklinklink!!


my mistake, it was yo mommaship's so fat.... still really funny ones though. i think i even put one in there.

if you wanted the combat-ex losership there's the combat-ex/chill showmatch casted by the wonderful day9 (lol, he's really cleaned up his act since he's become more mainstream), this is really funny if you haven't watched it. there's also the original combat-ex embarrassment here. that took too long, time to program the next week of swim camp...
How's the weather down there?
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