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How to rape yourself 101

Blogs > AcrossFiveJulys
Post a Reply
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AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
December 08 2009 20:57 GMT
#1
Step 1. Enroll in graduate school for computer science.

Step 2. Get a TA position for the coming year.

Step 3. Decide to take three graduate courses:

--one of which is a weeder class for electrical engineering grad students, is mathematically rigorous, and generally one of the harder courses the university has to offer with an insane professor. Weekly homework assignments that take roughly 15 hours each and near-impossible exams will be helpful in convincing you that you are a terrible student.

--another CS grad course which is mathematically rigorous and depends on a linear algebra background. Be sure you have no such background so you have to learn it as you go. The fact that the professor begins with the most difficult material in the course and assigns crazy difficult homework will be essential in making you confident that you are indeed being raped.

--another CS course with annoying projects and homework constantly being assigned. The fact that you find this class easy will be offset by how boring it is and how terribly it is taught and organized.

Step 4. Get heavily involved in a research project. Spend large amounts of time trying to fix bugs and hurdle small issues instead of being able to focus on what is important to you.



I'm not sure how well this plan would work for the rest of you, but by following it I have definitely met my goal of getting completely raped in graduate school!

Seriously though, I'm so tired and can't wait for this semester to be over. I really took on way too much stuff my first semester in grad school and am constantly in a rush to get everything done on time with almost no time for significant breaks.

Finals are over in two weeks so I'll finally be able to relax for a bit. The good news is I managed to do well enough in my research to secure an RA position for next semester, so I won't have to spend time TAing in order to get my funding and can focus on research instead.

Hope finals are going well for all the other university-goers here!

*****
fanatacist
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
10319 Posts
December 08 2009 21:00 GMT
#2
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.
Peace~
Ganfei
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Taiwan1439 Posts
December 08 2009 21:00 GMT
#3
You're insane
You are crushing me like a cheese sandwich
Slaughter
Profile Blog Joined November 2003
United States20254 Posts
December 08 2009 21:02 GMT
#4
Great to know, Im pretty much doing that next semester.....
Never Knows Best.
RebirthOfLeGenD
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
USA5860 Posts
December 08 2009 21:03 GMT
#5
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.

Let me get this strait, you had swine flu and let me get in your car?
WHATFUCKTHE
Be a man, Become a Legend. TL Mafia Forum Ask for access!!
ejac
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States1195 Posts
December 08 2009 21:07 GMT
#6
On December 09 2009 06:03 RebirthOfLeGenD wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.

Let me get this strait, you had swine flu and let me get in your car?
WHATFUCKTHE

raped.
esq>n
DreaM)XeRO
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Korea (South)4667 Posts
December 08 2009 21:11 GMT
#7
now try and hit B while doing all of this

tell me how it goes
cw)minsean(ru
LosingID8
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
CA10829 Posts
December 08 2009 21:12 GMT
#8
not too bad this semester

i'm working as a resident advisor, and taking 4 courses but only 2 of them are sciences (chinese literature, gender studies in korean film and literature, genetics, physics). for my finals i have a term paper due tomorrow, and then 3 exams next monday, tuesday, and wednesday.

i'm going to be raped next semester though with biochem, physics, human anatomy, and cell biology.
ModeratorResident K-POP Elitist
LosingID8
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
CA10829 Posts
December 08 2009 21:13 GMT
#9
btw you're crazy for taking that courseload on top of TAing and research.
ModeratorResident K-POP Elitist
fanatacist
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
10319 Posts
December 08 2009 21:16 GMT
#10
On December 09 2009 06:03 RebirthOfLeGenD wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.

Let me get this strait, you had swine flu and let me get in your car?
WHATFUCKTHE

That was like 2 months before I got it lol
Peace~
meeple
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
Canada10211 Posts
December 08 2009 21:20 GMT
#11
Intense man, good luck on your finals
Frits
Profile Joined March 2003
11782 Posts
December 08 2009 21:29 GMT
#12
On December 09 2009 06:03 RebirthOfLeGenD wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.

Let me get this strait, you had swine flu and let me get in your car?
WHATFUCKTHE


haha you two hang out, surprising
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
December 08 2009 21:35 GMT
#13
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.


Haha I got the flu 2nd/3rd of the semester week back in September, forgot about that. I don't think it was swine flu though, but it sucked massively.
Funnytoss
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Taiwan1471 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-12-08 21:51:12
December 08 2009 21:35 GMT
#14
No wonder you haven't been playing with us much ^_^;

Hope next semester works out better!
AIV_Funnytoss and sGs.Funnytoss on iCCup
Myrmidon
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
United States9452 Posts
December 08 2009 21:38 GMT
#15
I knew people that took 3 graduate classes and worked as a TA, but nobody does research on top of that. Wtf are you doing, actually doing a significant amount of research your first semester? And how'd you get through undergrad in a technical major (and I'm assuming CS or something very related) without having to take some linear algebra?

I'm surprised you're alive. Better luck the rest of school, seriously!
ProbeSaturation
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Canada292 Posts
December 08 2009 21:42 GMT
#16
That's why the main priority should be getting into a professional school.
Standardized testing gogogogo!
Sadistx
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Zimbabwe5568 Posts
December 08 2009 21:46 GMT
#17
And this is why I'm not a CS major. The workload would suck every last living fiber out of me.
fanatacist
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
10319 Posts
December 08 2009 21:57 GMT
#18
On December 09 2009 06:29 Frits wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 06:03 RebirthOfLeGenD wrote:
On December 09 2009 06:00 fanatacist wrote:
I am failing like three classes because I missed a month due to swine flu, and now I have to have meetings with all these different deans so that I can do all the work in the next 7 days... Raped.

Let me get this strait, you had swine flu and let me get in your car?
WHATFUCKTHE


haha you two hang out, surprising

Lol do you hang out Frits? Doesn't matter what you say, I got high and drove to Princeton for CSL and it was the shit.
Peace~
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
December 08 2009 22:06 GMT
#19
On December 09 2009 06:38 Myrmidon wrote:
I knew people that took 3 graduate classes and worked as a TA, but nobody does research on top of that. Wtf are you doing, actually doing a significant amount of research your first semester?


I don't know anyone else who tried to juggle this many commitments their first semester either, but I bet I'm not the only one. I dunno dude, somehow everything has worked out very well minus one terrible exam. I was able to manipulate things somewhat in that I'm substituting a project in one of my courses with my research which has worked out nicely. As for significant... I wouldn't call it all that significant yet. A lot of the stuff I've been doing is empirical work testing out an algorithm that was developed in my lab. Though, I have come up with some theory on my own as well, but I don't know yet if it will wind up being useful.


And how'd you get through undergrad in a technical major (and I'm assuming CS or something very related) without having to take some linear algebra?


I did CS as an undergrad. I did take a "linear algebra" course my first year, but I'm putting it in quotes because it was utter shit and didn't teach me anything. The only thing that made it linear algebra-ish was we memorized how to find eigen values. And by memorized I mean we did it without even being shown what they are and what they are useful for. So I might as well have had no linear algebra background. On a sidenote, I learned the subject on my own a couple months ago by watching Gilbert Strang's lectures on MIT courseware, if anyone is interested you should check it out: http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Mathematics/18-06Spring-2005/VideoLectures/
Elite00fm
Profile Joined January 2008
United States548 Posts
December 08 2009 22:37 GMT
#20
where did you go for your undergrad and what are your thoughts on a CS degree? (that is, if you can find time to answer this, haha)
TimmyMac
Profile Joined December 2008
Canada499 Posts
December 08 2009 22:55 GMT
#21
lol, I did this my first semester of my M.Sc. ez. Spent like 25 hours a week on school maybe.
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
December 08 2009 23:04 GMT
#22
I thought this would be another guide to masturbation.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
m3rciless
Profile Joined August 2009
United States1476 Posts
December 08 2009 23:50 GMT
#23
On December 09 2009 07:06 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 06:38 Myrmidon wrote:
I knew people that took 3 graduate classes and worked as a TA, but nobody does research on top of that. Wtf are you doing, actually doing a significant amount of research your first semester?


I don't know anyone else who tried to juggle this many commitments their first semester either, but I bet I'm not the only one. I dunno dude, somehow everything has worked out very well minus one terrible exam. I was able to manipulate things somewhat in that I'm substituting a project in one of my courses with my research which has worked out nicely. As for significant... I wouldn't call it all that significant yet. A lot of the stuff I've been doing is empirical work testing out an algorithm that was developed in my lab. Though, I have come up with some theory on my own as well, but I don't know yet if it will wind up being useful.

Show nested quote +

And how'd you get through undergrad in a technical major (and I'm assuming CS or something very related) without having to take some linear algebra?


I did CS as an undergrad. I did take a "linear algebra" course my first year, but I'm putting it in quotes because it was utter shit and didn't teach me anything. The only thing that made it linear algebra-ish was we memorized how to find eigen values. And by memorized I mean we did it without even being shown what they are and what they are useful for. So I might as well have had no linear algebra background. On a sidenote, I learned the subject on my own a couple months ago by watching Gilbert Strang's lectures on MIT courseware, if anyone is interested you should check it out: http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Mathematics/18-06Spring-2005/VideoLectures/


Yeah dawg, you probably should have caught up with linear algebra at some point. I'm only a senior in high school and i'm taking Linear algebra with multivariate calculus, as i was told it's absolutely fundamental to a CS degree.
White-Ra fighting!
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
December 09 2009 02:27 GMT
#24
On December 09 2009 08:50 m3rciless wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 07:06 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
On December 09 2009 06:38 Myrmidon wrote:
I knew people that took 3 graduate classes and worked as a TA, but nobody does research on top of that. Wtf are you doing, actually doing a significant amount of research your first semester?


I don't know anyone else who tried to juggle this many commitments their first semester either, but I bet I'm not the only one. I dunno dude, somehow everything has worked out very well minus one terrible exam. I was able to manipulate things somewhat in that I'm substituting a project in one of my courses with my research which has worked out nicely. As for significant... I wouldn't call it all that significant yet. A lot of the stuff I've been doing is empirical work testing out an algorithm that was developed in my lab. Though, I have come up with some theory on my own as well, but I don't know yet if it will wind up being useful.


And how'd you get through undergrad in a technical major (and I'm assuming CS or something very related) without having to take some linear algebra?


I did CS as an undergrad. I did take a "linear algebra" course my first year, but I'm putting it in quotes because it was utter shit and didn't teach me anything. The only thing that made it linear algebra-ish was we memorized how to find eigen values. And by memorized I mean we did it without even being shown what they are and what they are useful for. So I might as well have had no linear algebra background. On a sidenote, I learned the subject on my own a couple months ago by watching Gilbert Strang's lectures on MIT courseware, if anyone is interested you should check it out: http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Mathematics/18-06Spring-2005/VideoLectures/


Yeah dawg, you probably should have caught up with linear algebra at some point. I'm only a senior in high school and i'm taking Linear algebra with multivariate calculus, as i was told it's absolutely fundamental to a CS degree.


Well, congrats on being such a smarty pants and taking that material only being in high school. I was able to skip the first two courses in calculus because of the AP course I took in high school, but I guess the bar is being raised nowadays for kids in math, which is a good thing.

That aside, whoever told you it's absolutely fundamental to a CS degree has no idea what they're talking about. Linear algebra is only extremely important in machine learning, my area of specialty. The only other areas of CS I know about that use Linear algebra are bioinformatics (because bioinformatics uses some machine learning algorithms) and scientific computing (part of which aims to do common scientific computations really fast, such as computing eigen values, etc). Some linear algebra might come up in graphics and/or vision but I'm not sure because I haven't taken courses in those areas. These are just a few of the many areas of CS. Saying linear algebra is fundamental to CS is like saying being able to mutalisk micro against scourge is fundamental to being a starcraft player-- you only need to know how to do it if you're a zerg player.
m3rciless
Profile Joined August 2009
United States1476 Posts
December 09 2009 03:15 GMT
#25
On December 09 2009 11:27 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 09 2009 08:50 m3rciless wrote:
On December 09 2009 07:06 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
On December 09 2009 06:38 Myrmidon wrote:
I knew people that took 3 graduate classes and worked as a TA, but nobody does research on top of that. Wtf are you doing, actually doing a significant amount of research your first semester?


I don't know anyone else who tried to juggle this many commitments their first semester either, but I bet I'm not the only one. I dunno dude, somehow everything has worked out very well minus one terrible exam. I was able to manipulate things somewhat in that I'm substituting a project in one of my courses with my research which has worked out nicely. As for significant... I wouldn't call it all that significant yet. A lot of the stuff I've been doing is empirical work testing out an algorithm that was developed in my lab. Though, I have come up with some theory on my own as well, but I don't know yet if it will wind up being useful.


And how'd you get through undergrad in a technical major (and I'm assuming CS or something very related) without having to take some linear algebra?


I did CS as an undergrad. I did take a "linear algebra" course my first year, but I'm putting it in quotes because it was utter shit and didn't teach me anything. The only thing that made it linear algebra-ish was we memorized how to find eigen values. And by memorized I mean we did it without even being shown what they are and what they are useful for. So I might as well have had no linear algebra background. On a sidenote, I learned the subject on my own a couple months ago by watching Gilbert Strang's lectures on MIT courseware, if anyone is interested you should check it out: http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Mathematics/18-06Spring-2005/VideoLectures/


Yeah dawg, you probably should have caught up with linear algebra at some point. I'm only a senior in high school and i'm taking Linear algebra with multivariate calculus, as i was told it's absolutely fundamental to a CS degree.


Well, congrats on being such a smarty pants and taking that material only being in high school. I was able to skip the first two courses in calculus because of the AP course I took in high school, but I guess the bar is being raised nowadays for kids in math, which is a good thing.

That aside, whoever told you it's absolutely fundamental to a CS degree has no idea what they're talking about. Linear algebra is only extremely important in machine learning, my area of specialty. The only other areas of CS I know about that use Linear algebra are bioinformatics (because bioinformatics uses some machine learning algorithms) and scientific computing (part of which aims to do common scientific computations really fast, such as computing eigen values, etc). Some linear algebra might come up in graphics and/or vision but I'm not sure because I haven't taken courses in those areas. These are just a few of the many areas of CS. Saying linear algebra is fundamental to CS is like saying being able to mutalisk micro against scourge is fundamental to being a starcraft player-- you only need to know how to do it if you're a zerg player.


I see. Well, i suppose it looks good for colleges anyway. Not a total loss.
White-Ra fighting!
Slaughter
Profile Blog Joined November 2003
United States20254 Posts
December 09 2009 04:43 GMT
#26
This seriously makes me dreading next semester as my story will be Very similar, except change it to Anthropology instead of CS.
Never Knows Best.
zer0das
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States8519 Posts
December 09 2009 05:36 GMT
#27
I empathize. Chemistry here. Hello 40 hours a week of electronics when the most I had ever done before was like two days of bread boarding in an undergraduate class! Then teaching... research (hardly ever though... sigh)... more classes, 3-6 hour oral exams every other week.

So glad electronics is over and life will be more normal (or at least one where I don't have to run off of 4-5 hours a sleep for most of the week).
Frits
Profile Joined March 2003
11782 Posts
December 10 2009 01:51 GMT
#28
greeetings gfrom a psych major lmao helllooo 6 weeks of vacatiosn and 2 weeks of work lol

though im probably gonna transfer to medicine since its to easy, dunno

ggl with your major thoughhg xx
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