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Valhalla18444 Posts
Streets alight with fire, the masses enthralled in chaos and murder. The Power Rank is late. The heathens cry to the heavens, asking God himself to deliver the head of FakeSteve. FakeSteve sits atop his mountain fortress, glaring down into the burning streets of the village below. He strokes his beard thoughtfully, and utters a single word.
"Okay."
Like a bolt of lightning, FakeSteve's edict explodes from his hand. They will cower before me, they will bend their knee in servitude, or they will die. FakeSteve hefts his mighty blade, and with the new law of ProGaming carved into stone tablets, he mounts his '74 Impala with the rims all tricked out, and blasts down treacherous mountain roads blaring voracious, murder-inducing speed metal.
FakeSteve slams through the town wall in his totally sweet ride, mowing down several vagrants. Special wipers start moving over his radiator grill, their grisly task clearing human entrails from the grating. They utter no complaint.
FakeSteve climbs atop his chromed-out roof and points his headsplitter toward the heavens.
"PEONS. I AM HERE WITH THE NEW LAW. I LIVE BECAUSE YOUR GOD IS DEAD, AND I WILL LIVE FOREVERMORE."
FakeSteve slams the stone slabs to the ground, cracking the cobblestones as the terrified crowd scrambles backward. A lone girl of about six ventures forth, lacking the comprehension necessary to be shocked, or in awe. FakeSteve grins through his blood-soaked beard as she approaches the tablet.
"...it says Jaedong is number one, and Bisu is above Fantasy."
A heavy silence falls over the mass of bodies. Ten seconds pass, twenty seconds, thirty. A shrill voice shatters the cadence: "ARE YOU INSANE?!?! BISU ABOVE FANTASY?!" The crowd rushes forth, crude sticks and farm tools in their hands.
FakeSteve smiles bitterly, and bloodlust surges.
Let them come.
http://www.teamliquid.net/powerrank/
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If you would just remove your Impala from atop my lung cavity I would tell you that you are a crazy man for putting Luxury at 2.
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just put nalra on no.1 plz gg no re~
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Hungary11234 Posts
Let the witchhunt ffa begin!
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Spenguin
Australia3316 Posts
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is awesome32263 Posts
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the let them come part at the end for some reason reminded me of gwar and i haven't listened to them in years lol
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i always look forward to this time of the month
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motbob
United States12546 Posts
I think this writeup was worth the lateness.
EDIT: Also the PR itself is perfect. There has never been a better written or more correct PR.
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Netherlands6142 Posts
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On April 10 2009 20:08 Pholon wrote: lol so conceited
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I'm getting a sex change so that I might be that much closer to having your children.
Edit: Palindromic post count ftw!
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konadora
Singapore66063 Posts
I would gladly receiving all the beatings, for you have done a perfect job with the power rankings.
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United States41600 Posts
I like everything about this power rank. Lux is a forgotten beast, overshadowed by the OSL.
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Hoorah 2 zergs on top baby. Thanks for the pr.
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Jaedong at number one? Who would have thought~
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Haha awesome intro.
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I love this power rank. Jaedong #1 and NaDa in the list!
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