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I think you're being childish. I say this as a guy who went through the exact same experience.
You should think carefully about whether or not you're really willing to throw it all away. If you are, then be a man about it and just walk away. Don't talk to her anymore, don't try to make her feel bad, don't try to show off that you're sleeping with other girls to her. In essence, don't be a vindictive little shit and just disappear.
If you are not willing to throw it all away and you can see past this then you should truly forgive and forget and try to make it work with her clean slate. Anything less than clean slate will not work.
I think the way you're viewing this is utterly retarded. It's an easy knee-jerk reaction to be all blah blah she's a whore etc. But you know what? Get over yourself. YOU broke up with her. SHE was a free woman. And she can do whatever she wants with her body. Just because she had a moment of weakness after you completely crushed her ego does not make her a skank. And the fact you're so unempathetic and irresponsible about the emotional damage YOU caused to her is further proof that you're not ready to be a man. So as much as you'd like to tell yourself you're some bad ass dude who don't give a fuck and is about to do massive damage on the singles scene, you should really not do that and instead try to learn something about how to be a decent human being from all this wreckage.
Also, I think it's important to bring attention to your blatant hypocrisy. YOU slept with her while you guys weren't dating, which is just as skanky as her sleeping with some other guy in Arizona. Yet somehow when you did it with her it was some tender transcendental moment. But god forbid she do the same with someone else! That's so skanky! Blow it out your ass, man.
As you get older in life, you'll realize sex is not that big a fucking deal. And when a girl's single she can do what she wants. Hell, when a girl's in a relationship she can do what she wants. Marriage and kids is when shit gets real because that's when real commitments are made. Everything before that is just some bogus facebook status bullshit that can change on a dime.
My advice: drop the theatrics and stop crying over your bruised ego. It's worthless. Ask yourself is this girl one in a million? If so, forgive her. Or do you see yourself replacing her no problem? Then move on. But personally, I think you're just being a crybaby about the whole thing.
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I totally understand your decisions and I feel for you man, but... yea sorry I am gonna but this. When you totally calm down, I still think you can regret this. Try to look at her point of view, I know you did this, but you looked from her point of view with your point of view, which does make no sence... w/e. "Moving on"
She hooked up with someone else during a vacation after you guys made a friends with benefits agreement. So, as she explained, she felt the same way on New years eve, so she misses you. She is at the moment probably a little pissed at you for abandoning her and she meets this dude, while she maybe drunk a little (dunno that details) and he makes her feel better, like with you. Ofcourse she doesn't care about your little agreement, because she is feeling better now. Don't get me wrong, It is still wrong, but understandable from her point of view.
Then she reads that email and starts to think about what went down. She gets regrets and has to wait talking to you until after vacation. Wehn she gets back she allready feels that she is hiding a secret. Once you feel like you are hiding something, then it becomes so much harder to say it to someone. You can clearly she that she is avoiding telling you by indeed making that wall.
Eventhough, you told all your history and explained everything, she felt so bad for keeping a secret that she has to keep it a secret. She does not have the nerv to tell it to you.
Long Story short: Her situation had no good ending either, realize that and you be able to forgive her.
I hope you do, or I hope everything works out for the both of you!
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On February 15 2012 01:33 StorkHwaiting wrote: I think you're being childish. I say this as a guy who went through the exact same experience.
You should think carefully about whether or not you're really willing to throw it all away. If you are, then be a man about it and just walk away. Don't talk to her anymore, don't try to make her feel bad, don't try to show off that you're sleeping with other girls to her. In essence, don't be a vindictive little shit and just disappear.
If you are not willing to throw it all away and you can see past this then you should truly forgive and forget and try to make it work with her clean slate. Anything less than clean slate will not work.
I think the way you're viewing this is utterly retarded. It's an easy knee-jerk reaction to be all blah blah she's a whore etc. But you know what? Get over yourself. YOU broke up with her. SHE was a free woman. And she can do whatever she wants with her body. Just because she had a moment of weakness after you completely crushed her ego does not make her a skank. And the fact you're so unempathetic and irresponsible about the emotional damage YOU caused to her is further proof that you're not ready to be a man. So as much as you'd like to tell yourself you're some bad ass dude who don't give a fuck and is about to do massive damage on the singles scene, you should really not do that and instead try to learn something about how to be a decent human being from all this wreckage.
Also, I think it's important to bring attention to your blatant hypocrisy. YOU slept with her while you guys weren't dating, which is just as skanky as her sleeping with some other guy in Arizona. Yet somehow when you did it with her it was some tender transcendental moment. But god forbid she do the same with someone else! That's so skanky! Blow it out your ass, man.
As you get older in life, you'll realize sex is not that big a fucking deal. And when a girl's single she can do what she wants. Hell, when a girl's in a relationship she can do what she wants. Marriage and kids is when shit gets real because that's when real commitments are made. Everything before that is just some bogus facebook status bullshit that can change on a dime.
My advice: drop the theatrics and stop crying over your bruised ego. It's worthless. Ask yourself is this girl one in a million? If so, forgive her. Or do you see yourself replacing her no problem? Then move on. But personally, I think you're just being a crybaby about the whole thing.
Hey man I feel you. I do. I just think somewhere in all this you're not feeling me. I never called her a whore or never ment to imply she was. In fact, I specifically stated that her hooking up with someone else wasn't the thing that bothered me. I am still crazy about her, maybe always will be.
This isn't me covering up a bruised ego. This is me telling my story. I tried hard not to slant it either way but i guess you saw this as a bash thread, I'm sorry. That wasn't my intention.
I know i never wrote it down, but i implied that i forgave her. I do forgive her. I get what happened and why she was scared to tell me. That doesn't mean it didn't fucking suck though.
And i also think it's weird that you're calling me out on not being a man about it and walking away, which is almost exactly what i'm doing. Maybe in working the story aspect i didn't emphasize that enough. I'm moving on. Do I still want her back and would I still be willing to fight and try? yes. But i realize how hard that would be and that most likely isn't the option she wants to pursue. We ended on a good note. I don't know what more to tell you. I'm not running, i'm not crying and i'm not trying to be theatrical.
I just wanted to share my story with TL. Maybe you've read too many teenage girl blogs where everything you've said is true. Maybe i wrote this too childishly for you to believe it. Idk what it is but try to take a second and chill. This was painfully genuine.
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best use of skipped chem class ever.
hope you succeed in the future.
girls are crazy.
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Such a well written Girl Blog. Probably the best one I've read. You did such a great job at conveying your feelings through writing. I'm not sure I'd be able to do the same.
Do you man. It'll all work out in the end.
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On February 15 2012 00:38 Akamu wrote: @ Samurai- umm, what 14 year old closes his blog with a going out to the bars joke? Haha i'm one of those lucky few that were cursed with a late birthday and am 20 years young while in my third year at university. You got me mixed up with someone else man. I didn't write the quote you have. No harm no foul.
Ah god damn it, i have no idea how i ve mixed that up, my apologies i ve edited my post
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Hey, Akamu, I think StorkHwaiting my just be projecting. What he's basically saying, either way, is, "get in that friendzone, soldier!" el oh el.
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