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Don't post in this thread to say "gay gamers are like everyone else, why do they have a special thread?" It is something that has been posted numerous times, and this isn't the place for that discussion.
For regular posters, don't quote the trolls. |
On March 03 2011 14:32 Dhalphir wrote: This is something I've always wondered....why is Gay a term that is used to apply to homosexual men AND frequently also to homosexual women? I mean, they have a term for themselves already.
Correct me if I have been misinformed, but it is my understanding that the term "gay" was first adopted as a code word by the homosexual community of both sexes in order to be able to talk in public without disclosing their sexuality. "We had a gay time." "It was a gay party." etc.
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On March 03 2011 05:48 slyboogie wrote:I'm not sure but I feel like this might be the right place for this http://www.npr.org/2011/03/02/134194491/high-court-rules-for-military-funeral-protesters. Basically, the USSC ruled in favor (8-1) of the Westboro Baptist Church who enjoys protesting at the funerals of American soldiers. Their ideas are basically that God is punishing America for its acceptance of homosexuality. It's the correct legal ruling by the laws of our nation but it is a really depressing day to be an American. I was just wondering what you guys thought of this. Freedom of speech works both ways, cant argue one way and not have the other protected
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On March 03 2011 05:48 slyboogie wrote:I'm not sure but I feel like this might be the right place for this http://www.npr.org/2011/03/02/134194491/high-court-rules-for-military-funeral-protesters. Basically, the USSC ruled in favor (8-1) of the Westboro Baptist Church who enjoys protesting at the funerals of American soldiers. Their ideas are basically that God is punishing America for its acceptance of homosexuality. It's the correct legal ruling by the laws of our nation but it is a really depressing day to be an American. I was just wondering what you guys thought of this. you have the right to express your sexuality, they have the right to look(and act) like idiots. In that light, I think you should be proud to be american
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On March 04 2011 03:53 exploding.godhand wrote: when was the word "lesbian" invented? kind of funny how i learned it, it was in ancient civilizations class in high school talking about the greeks. our teacher made some kind of laugh/joke about it that i forget. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lesbos
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Bosnia-Herzegovina114 Posts
On March 02 2011 08:46 Mora wrote: This is my caring face. *points at face* I instantly thought of Jack McFarland when I read this. :-) I apologize if that comment was inappropriate.
On March 02 2011 08:46 Mora wrote: Please be cautious when entering the space of others; you're sharp, you might cut someone. Hence I socialize with only the most open-minded of open-minded people.
Anyway, you offered to answer questions and I have one for you:
From what I've seen so far in life, everyone has both a male and female side - one is shown to all and the other one is usually hidden. Their relative strengths may vary from person to person, and if that's true, it would nicely explain why there are feminine straight men, masculine straight women, bisexual, homosexual and infinite combination of (sexual) behaviors.
This would also explain why so often people seem to promise something and not do it - their public side ensured you something will be done, but it's up to their private side (which is of opposite gender!) to do it, and it may have a completely different view on the matter.
My hypothesis is that disrupting a child's privacy (mostly by parents) makes it display something which is normally intimate.
So, my question to you is: What are your feelings on how your parents treated your privacy?
Please try to understand why I'm asking this - when would I ever be able to approach someone who declares himself as 'gay', ask him this question and get any sort of serious answer? Besides, you've already shared some very ... vivid experiences with us.
I talked with my best friend, Igor (one of the above mentioned crème de la crème of tolerance), about pride parades and we quickly agreed that it does not seem the proper way to gain recognition.
I can't speak for everyone, but I can for me and my friend:
If you, Mora, want to be respected by straight people, be more of a Will Truman and less Jack (although Will can screech too, but everybody can have a bad day).
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On March 04 2011 06:09 greendestiny wrote:I instantly thought of Jack McFarland when I read this. :-) I apologize if that comment was inappropriate. Show nested quote +On March 02 2011 08:46 Mora wrote: Please be cautious when entering the space of others; you're sharp, you might cut someone. Hence I socialize with only the most open-minded of open-minded people. Anyway, you offered to answer questions and I have one for you: From what I've seen so far in life, everyone has both a male and female side - one is shown to all and the other one is usually hidden. Their relative strengths may vary from person to person, and if that's true, it would nicely explain why there are feminine straight men, masculine straight women, bisexual, homosexual and infinite combination of (sexual) behaviors. This would also explain why so often people seem to promise something and not do it - their public side ensured you something will be done, but it's up to their private side (which is of opposite gender!) to do it, and it may have a completely different view on the matter. My hypothesis is that disrupting a child's privacy (mostly by parents) makes it display something which is normally intimate. So, my question to you is: What are your feelings on how your parents treated your privacy?Please try to understand why I'm asking this - when would I ever be able to approach someone who declares himself as 'gay', ask him this question and get any sort of serious answer? Besides, you've already shared some very ... vivid experiences with us. I talked with my best friend, Igor (one of the above mentioned crème de la crème of tolerance), about pride parades and we quickly agreed that it does not seem the proper way to gain recognition. I can't speak for everyone, but I can for me and my friend: If you, Mora, want to be respected by straight people, be more of a Will Truman and less Jack (although Will can screech too, but everybody can have a bad day).
So most of this is stuff i completely disagree with so this maybe a long post, but ive time to burn so here we go.
From what I've seen so far in life, everyone has both a male and female side - one is shown to all and the other one is usually hidden. Their relative strengths may vary from person to person, and if that's true, it would nicely explain why there are feminine straight men, masculine straight women, bisexual, homosexual and infinite combination of (sexual) behaviors.
Kind of a big generalisation here, always should be prefaced with "i have a very limited view on the world in my social bubble, here is a generalisation that ive made" because thats exactly what it is. How you define masculine and feminine is also very open to debate, one could argue shared traits are "human" traits, you may call a man who empathises "feminine" but most humans emphasise, i think it is slightly too vague for a debate to just label masculine and feminine traits when diversity isnnt so simple. I mean sure people conform to social norms, but im taking your viewpoint from a more biological than social standpoint, if this is wrong im sorry but its kind of how you worded it. As regards the attitudes and reflections people give off, you have to understand that the "feminine man" persona associated with gay men is just as poor a generalisation as the "butch woman" who is a lesbian, sure there does exist a subset of gay people who exhibit more male and more female characteristics but in general movies and tv shows have kind of lied to you.
This would also explain why so often people seem to promise something and not do it - their public side ensured you something will be done, but it's up to their private side (which is of opposite gender!) to do it, and it may have a completely different view on the matter.
Again i feel you have somewhat missed the point here, being gay is not being a different gender, you arent a man in a womans body or vice versa, thats a whole other kettle of fish.
I talked with my best friend, Igor (one of the above mentioned crème de la crème of tolerance), about pride parades and we quickly agreed that it does not seem the proper way to gain recognition.
Pride parades are, generally speaking, a nice way to show the world how far we have come and gain some recognition as to how far we have to go still, its often used a way to induce some level of social recognition that, like so many other groups, there are still some economic, social and political disadvantages to being gay, thats just the way it is. On the other hand again you have to stay away from broad generalisations, not every gay person goes, not every gay person cares. I think people tend to think that once someone identifies as gay they can be somewhat lumped into a column where" well this mans gay, therfore his views are x, y and z, he practices c, b and a and surely hes interested in r t and s". Now im sure you know alot of people and you wouldnt clump them all together as one just because they are straight, the same applies in reverse.
If you, Mora, want to be respected by straight people, be more of a Will Truman and less Jack (although Will can screech too, but everybody can have a bad day).
Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine.
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Freedom of speech works both ways, cant argue one way and not have the other protected
You're absolutely right. Any American in 12th grade Civics knows that the protesters did nothing illegal. I did not take issue with the USSC ruling in a legal aspect, rather, I was disappointed by the behavior of Americans towards one another.
you have the right to express your sexuality, they have the right to look(and act) like idiots. In that light, I think you should be proud to be american
This is the old "I don't agree with what you're saying but I'll die defending your right to say it" thing. While it's true in general, it is a bitter pill to swallow. Also, I am heterosexual. I simply think that the whole issue is disturbing and brings up questions of public space, the definition of speech and privacy, etc
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On March 04 2011 07:30 Frack wrote: Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine. I totally agree. Gay people can be just as conservative/racist/heteronormative as straight people. Some of the most racist people I've ever met are gays.
While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else. There are a lot of gays that are all about promoting conservative gender stereotypes too -- fantasizing about other white, middle-class, straight, Republican males that will dominate them in bed.
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Just as their are many straight men who wear dresses and fantasise about being spanked
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On March 04 2011 12:47 adrenaLinG wrote:Show nested quote +On March 04 2011 07:30 Frack wrote: Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine. I totally agree. Gay people can be just as conservative/racist/heteronormative as straight people. Some of the most racist people I've ever met are gays. While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else. There are a lot of gays that are all about promoting conservative gender stereotypes too -- fantasizing about other white, middle-class, straight, Republican males that will dominate them in bed. some of the most homophobic people I know are gay :O it's that great irony
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On March 04 2011 17:36 Roe wrote:Show nested quote +On March 04 2011 12:47 adrenaLinG wrote:On March 04 2011 07:30 Frack wrote: Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine. I totally agree. Gay people can be just as conservative/racist/heteronormative as straight people. Some of the most racist people I've ever met are gays. While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else. There are a lot of gays that are all about promoting conservative gender stereotypes too -- fantasizing about other white, middle-class, straight, Republican males that will dominate them in bed. some of the most homophobic people I know are gay :O it's that great irony This stereotype is somewhat more prevalent among closeted gay people for obvious reasons, im not sure its irony as much as it is denial. Whether they truly believe it or not is another matter, i would tend to believe not as "out" people tend to shed their views in time, though often still struggle with some issues.
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United Kingdom36156 Posts
On March 04 2011 12:47 adrenaLinG wrote:
While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else.
Incredibly annoying why? Because they don't blend in with the straight majority? Why should being 'masculine' be more desirable than being feminine/camp?
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On March 04 2011 23:51 marvellosity wrote:+ Show Spoiler +On March 04 2011 12:47 adrenaLinG wrote:
While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else. Incredibly annoying why? Because they don't blend in with the straight majority? Why should being 'masculine' be more desirable than being feminine/camp?
This motherfucker is completely right.
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I dont necessarily blame people with those views in so far as they came about, there arent that many gay people outside of major cities, infact one of the big pieces of advice given is to migrate towards these large cities because of isolation in small towns. In short its hard to blame people who havent actively been exposed when they categorise others based on the information they do have, categorizing and pattern finding are inherent human traits. Having said this one wishes they would have more of an open mind. Its a difficult one but history is littered with wars and prejudices over peoples who just dont understand each other and therfore fear each other, i realise thats a crass generalisation which i dont like to make but it sort of fits.
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On March 04 2011 07:30 Frack wrote: Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine. Yeah, but I still don't get why people make so much noise about sexual orientation in the first place. If a male is attracted by Christina Aguilera (like I am) or by Rachel Weisz or by Brat Pitt, is completely his personal taste. It does not define him as a person. The personality is more complex anyways. There are way more imporant issues to talk about.
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On March 05 2011 00:59 [F_]aths wrote:Show nested quote +On March 04 2011 07:30 Frack wrote: Gay people can be as hard as Chuck norris or as camp as Jack, regardless they are all human beings, and if acting the latter means someone disrepects then thats their problem not mine. Yeah, but I still don't get why people make so much noise about sexual orientation in the first place. If a male is attracted by Christina Aguilera (like I am) or by Rachel Weisz or by Brat Pitt, is completely his personal taste. It does not define him as a person. The personality is more complex anyways; I know gay guys who are attracted by some woman. Why should I care if he is attracted mostly by this or that gender? There are way more imporant issues to talk about. Well i understand on some level why they do make "noise" about it and in an ideal world everyone would think like you do but we live in a world that isnt like that and, generally speaking, are subject to too many external stimuli and effects to guarantee we will grow up to be fully functioning and tolerable people. My issue mainly is between two principles, what we are told and what we choose. Like i say i find it really hard to harbour anything negative about people who are adamantly against the gay lifestyle because their upbringing or their religion or whatever external factors have contributed to a one sided view on the issue, their side. I do however have a beef with people who know gay people, who take the time to try and relate and understand and still come away with bigoted views. The fortunate thing is the latter is a very very small group, the more integration the more understanding, its extremely easy to think of a group of people as inhuman, without conscience or feeling or emotions, history is literally filled with it.
And yes theoretically there are way way way more important things to discuss and this shoud be a dead issue, but it isnt so gotta keep reaching on.
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On March 04 2011 23:51 marvellosity wrote:Show nested quote +On March 04 2011 12:47 adrenaLinG wrote:
While a lot of "camp" gays are incredibly annoying because they perpetuate stereotypes about gays, they suffer the same marginalization as everyone else. Incredibly annoying why? Because they don't blend in with the straight majority? Why should being 'masculine' be more desirable than being feminine/camp? Uh, because they legitimize stereotypes by heterosexuals that you are supposed to be fighting against?
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On March 02 2011 08:40 Mora wrote:Show nested quote +On March 02 2011 05:19 simme123 wrote:On March 02 2011 05:04 Mora wrote:On March 02 2011 05:02 skypig wrote:On March 02 2011 03:53 R1CH wrote: Religion discussion is generally frowned upon regardless of thread, since it's impossible to have a good discussion when the views you hold cannot be explained or argued against because it's your belief. Whether you're talking religion or not, everything eventually comes down to "believing" that something is "right or wrong", and not having evidence for it. If I asked someone to objectively prove to me that murder/rape/incest/stealing/etc. is "wrong", no one would be able to do it. In fact, the Socratic method would very quickly destroy any sort of logic or reasoning that people would try to use to "prove" that these things are right/wrong. In the end it all comes down to the gut feelings you have about certain behaviors, actions, lifestyles, etc....there IS no logic or reasoning that supports this. Bottom line: any "views" you hold in a "good discussion" don't really have evidence or logical backup at all; when you get to the very foundation of WHY you believe that something is good/bad/neutral/etc., you will find that it IS just a "core belief" (i.e. a "gut feeling" or notion that you have inside you). i like penises. particularly ones that are thick. what do you like? Mora, I've posted in this thread earlier and think it's a great thread but I still do believe that you should keep comments like thses out. The point of me responding the way I did was to highlight how off-topic his post was. Since saying 'keep these posts away' didn't work, I tried a different approach. Show nested quote +We get it you're gay there's no reason why you shouldn't like penises. But comments like these are just provocative and will not lead to anything good. So yeah though there are a lot of (pardon my language) dickheads out there who bash you for being gay must you sink down to their level and also be provocative. Honey, (yes, I'm pulling out my fabulous half) those words were a little tame, and on the internet i'm going to be less inclined to filter myself than offline. When your most intimate sexual act as a homosexual is sticking your junk into another dude's exit, you're going to become desensitized to this kind of stuff. And to be honest: it's a good thing. People should be open about their privates, their feelings, their orifices and the juices that come out of them. These subjects should not be taboo, it's unhealthy. Growing up that kind of discussion was so taboo that i would be awkward around my parents even watching people kiss on TV. Then i met my boyfriend, whose parents, at my first dinner with them, discussed how his dad used a dildo on his mom the night before. I was appalled at the time, but now that i have many years of experience under my belt, i can safely say that people who are open and talk about sex have better sex, are more confident, and are less likely to cause complexes in their children. Show nested quote + As I mentioned earlier in this post I think it's great to know your story as well as the struggles of a homosexual. Eventhough this is the internet, I for one believe that you don't really need the details or even using sentences as the one i quoted because it doesn't sit right with some. But I'll say this again this is a great thread but please stop using phrases like this. And of course I'm not supporting the bashers by any means they're far worse since they don't have the ability to tolerate how some people actually are born.
I appreciate what you've gotten from this thread, but i can only accomodate you so far. Go to a gay pride parade. Notice the dykes on bikes riding around shirtless; notice the naked gogo-boys dancing on their floats. Notice the free condoms that are handed out. And notice the families that are present for it. These things are important, are normal, are not weird or gross or nasty; they should not be taboo! Cheers
Hm, I am not saying that you're not allowed to be vulgar or anything I'm just saying that at least I'd prefer it if you'd be abit for delicate in a discussion such as this one and if you really feel the need the way use the spoiler function or something. Of course it's up to you but as a person who's actually intrigued be the thread it's a real turn off for the thread. Since I do accept that gays have the right to what ever the fuck they want just that I feel no need to take part of it. The reason why I think this thread was so great was to "see the world" through a gay man's eyes. It just makes a great thread less appealing to me. But of course you have the right to do what ever pleases you just saying that it's not really surprising that you get some people expressing their disliking in a less civilized manner.
And it's not taboo to speak of gay sexual acts in anyway I think that when you read this thread it kinda jumps out of nowhere and you can't really avoid. Make a separate thread for that maybe? Ah well just so you know though I have nothing against you nor gays (except perez hilton that guys's a bitch).
Cheers
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