EPTHelp the shy quiet antisocial introvert... - Page 2
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lIlIlIlIlIlI
Korea (South)3851 Posts
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Chogs_User
United States410 Posts
why do you want to be more outgoing anyway? | ||
Bill307
Canada9103 Posts
On November 30 2005 22:05 mnm wrote: im too quiet and shy. i need help. how do i talk more? how do i make friends? outside of the bw setting i mean.. I've often wondered this myself. I have too few friends here at University. It's great fun to go out and watch a movie or something, and it's always less painful to work on an assignment with someone else rather than by yourself. For the most part, I really prefer spending time with other people (in person) over spending time alone. But my friends have lives too, and they can't just keep doing things with me all the time =P. Not to mention that I need to meet more women or else I'll never have a realistic shot at finding a girlfriend =P. Anyway, here is my current solution: talk to strangers. If you're out anywhere (e.g. waiting for something), and you see someone else who's alone (e.g. waiting for the same thing), and they have the facial expression of someone who is probably going to be friendly and open to conversation, then just start talking to them. Personally, I find the most inviting facial expressions to be a soft (non-egotistic) smile and a lonely/bored stare (which quickly becomes a smile once they start talking to you). You can just follow your emotions on this decision and all others, though, EXCEPT for your emotions of shyness and fear! Just consciously tell yourself those emotions are wrong, ignore them, and go in with no fear of being rejected. Once you've done it a few times, you will feel much less anxiety about talking to random people in the future. As for what to talk about, just comment on something you both have in common: being in the same class, waiting in the same line for the same thing, looking at the same family of ducks waddling by, etc. And my advice (and experience) pretty much ends there. Now my next problem is actually getting the contact information of the people I randomly meet, if meeting them is a one time thing (as opposed to, say, striking a random conversation with a classmate or coworker you've never really met). My current plan: if our little conversation leads to a common interest, then ask them if they'd like to do something together in the future related to said interest. After all, it's the natural thing to do, right? Haven't gotten a chance to put it into action yet, but I think it'll go well when I do. Hopefully I'll soon be hooking up with teh ladies left and right!  | ||
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mitsy
United States1792 Posts
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Bill307
Canada9103 Posts
On November 30 2005 22:15 randomKo_Orean wrote: no guys or girls will refuse if you start a friendly convo with them (About anything) I really like this advice  . I think it's something that's very important to realize and to understand in order to be a more social person.Shyness and anxiety are totally the wrong emotions to listen to when you're trying to judge who will be open to a conversation. If they're the kind of person who actually will refuse, you'll definitely be able to tell because you will actually feel repulsed or put-off by them. | ||
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lIlIlIlIlIlI
Korea (South)3851 Posts
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mitsy
United States1792 Posts
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Bill307
Canada9103 Posts
He's feeling sarcastic?  | ||
mrmin123
Korea (South)2971 Posts
On November 30 2005 22:35 HeadBangaa wrote: EDIT: Original poster, you're one of our rare female members, right? I always confuse you with mrmin or whoever, names look kinda similar. I met a helluva lotta great people at work. Half of my best friends are coworkers. "Whoever"? I am no "whoever"! But anyway, I'm a shy guy myself, but I've overcome most of my shyness by just forcing myself to talk with people. Most people are fairly friendly when you first start talking to them (unless they're total elitest dickwads), so try and take advantage of it and force yourself to start talking, introduce yourself, find something to talk about. Hopefully the rest will come naturally, because in my opinion, stuff like this isn't something you can really get that much help for, just a place to start. | ||
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brite
United Kingdom253 Posts
oh and i'm really nervous. when i have to stand up in front of the whole class or something i start to actually tremble and sometimes let go of pens or papers in my hand, which is of course very amusing for the rest of the class. so wtf do u talk about to someone that u know like from school and that's not some bs like "how was your we?" "how ur doing at school?"..,. or wahtever bs like that. oh and another thing. when i talk to girls i think are hot i seem to just talk bs and look around myself all the time, sothat i don't have to look her in the eyes. with girls that are just friends i can actually talk rather well, we have more in common ... stuff like that. | ||
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nortydog
Australia3067 Posts
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Chibi[OWNS]
United Kingdom10597 Posts
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Chibi[OWNS]
United Kingdom10597 Posts
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MoltkeWarding
5195 Posts
Strangely this applies for b.net as well as real life. | ||
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Chibi[OWNS]
United Kingdom10597 Posts
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Chibi[OWNS]
United Kingdom10597 Posts
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uhjoo
Korea (South)1740 Posts
:-) :-) | ||
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exalted
United States3612 Posts
MnM you seem pretty cool, I don't see the problem? Don't you work for Ubisoft and everything? The only thing I didn't quite like was when your thread where you were speculating if pretty people have it easier in life. In the service industry, ESPECIALLY the service industry you really should work your best to look your best, and this includes the superficial like makeup and clothes as well as your bodily health (abs, weight, KEGELS). This is a win/win situation, becuase you will be more confident (and therefore be more proactive in helping customers), and they will be more receptive to your advice becuase you will be a HOT GURLIE. Good luck! | ||
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Chibi[OWNS]
United Kingdom10597 Posts
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exalted
United States3612 Posts
On December 01 2005 01:14 MoltkeWarding wrote: If a stranger starts a conversation with me out of the blue I will ignore them or give one-word responses. Strangely this applies for b.net as well as real life. This is why you have never had a girlfriend in your life. Don't worry son, one day you will be king and know everything as well. Help me with college essay T_T | ||
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