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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not.
You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date.
tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out.
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On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date.
Again, it's a date only because you spent a ton of money on someone. I have never in my life spent that much at a restaurant or in a bar or club and I hope to only accomplish that if and when I get rich. Guess I have never been on a date in my life then huh? I've had a semi-formal dinner with my ex before and I spent like $50, can't tell me that wasn't a date.
You can spend intimate time together with someone and have it be a date without dropping some benjamins and showing off. I ain't looking to be a sugar daddy.
Your logic is off for what's a date and what isn't a date. What if I invite a girl over and we have some drinks and watch movies. I could do that with a guy friend and I can do that with a girl friend, what makes it a date is if I try to make some moves on the other person or not and what intent the parties involved have.
You are simply rolling in the cash good sir and everyone else doesn't have the ability to do what you think constitutes a date.
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On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out.
Let's say you spent 300 dollars on a fancy dinner but your conversation with her was stale and you dropped off her quickly after the dinner with nary a hug. On the other hand, perhaps you spent 30 dollars on a meal but then you drove up to a vista point at night and had a romantic 4-5 hours, chatting, cuddling and eventually making out (btw, I recently did precisely this and it was an unforgettable night). Are you seriously gonna call the first one a date and call the second one not a date?
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On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out.
I would never, ever take a guy friend out to dinner, ice cream, and a movie. That shit costs like $80 tops if you go to a decent restaurant and have a few drinks.
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A little background... I'm 28 and only recently have started getting into the dating scene. I've had girlfriends in the past (and one just a few months ago that was my longest), but we never started from "dating" so to speak. I'm really inexperienced with making the best of the "first dates" with women. I feel like I'm good at keeping the conversation going, and that's never been an issue. I feel like my biggest problem is with showing interest in being more than a friend and taking that step to try to move in for a kiss at the end of a good date. Also, I'm not comfortable with the bar/club scene where I feel like I have no starting spot to approach a woman, so I've started online dating. Only been on two dates so far, one a week basically.
Tomorrow I'm dating another new woman. From our brief chats and what she's wrote about herself on the site, we seem to be very compatible in the long term. I feel like we could potentially have a great date tomorrow, and I want to make sure I don't blow it by giving off the impression I just want to be a friend, or otherwise scare her off somehow. I know I'm also bad at paying attention to the details of facial expressions and body language - I tend to go with what is said and done instead of looking at those. Anyways... I'm mostly just venting, but any advice would be appreciated. I feel like what I need to do at the end of the night should basically be:
Tell her I had a great night and would like to see her again.
Look her in the eye and if I feel like it is genuinely mutual, move in to give her a kiss.
Walk away after wards... ?
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Russian Federation4447 Posts
nonono, looking at it the wrong way.
If you haven't been dating in a while, just go to girlschase.com and look up topics on conversation.
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On January 29 2013 12:34 phosphorylation wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out. Let's say you spent 300 dollars on a fancy dinner but your conversation with her was stale and you dropped off her quickly after the dinner with nary a hug. On the other hand, perhaps you spent 30 dollars on a meal but then you drove up to a vista point at night and had a romantic 4-5 hours, chatting, cuddling and eventually making out (btw, I recently did precisely this and it was an unforgettable night). Are you seriously gonna call the first one a date and call the second one not a date?
I wouldn't make that mistake first of all. I only take special ladies out for those special nights. And it isn't a nightly thing. If the 30 dollar meal was all you could afford or wanted to afford, then by all means, it's a date. I'm just saying by MY standards, if I'm going to consider something a date, I'm showing the lady a nice time because I want to show her how special she is to me. If I couldn't afford what I can afford, Applebees would achieve the same effect for me.
I should probably explain that I kind of do things in reverse. I sleep with them, hang out with them if they are nice girls, and then date them. The life of a club go'er. Sometimes if I meet them out of the club, I'll hang out with them first, then if I really like her I'll take her out on a date, and then sleep with her. If I kind of like her, I'll just take her out for drinks and then sleep with her. I don't do the actual "Date" thing frivolously.
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On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out.
So... asking a best friend to cuddle on a couch, take a nap, and watch a movie together, and then make dinner (at one of our houses/apartments) is not a date? You failed to point out how cuddling on a couch with home movie + making dinner + making out etc. is not a date.
What we're saying is that you don't have to spend several hundred dollars a year to show a girl a good time. Where do you get that notion from, and how much money do you make? XD By your own bolded definition, I can come up with probably at least 5 scenarios in as many minutes that cost <50$ and would be kind of strange for 2 guys to do.
I'm not debating with your "reverse" method or however you defined it. The specific question I have refers to your bold and this scenario:
I just saw my girlfriend last weekend. We spent friday night together, where we went to a restaurant to celebrate her birthday (35$), went home, sat on a couch making out + chatting + whatever for 2 hours, went out to a (free) cabaret concert because it's her birthday, went home. How (in your perception) does that 1) not constitute a date, and 2) not set off a gaydar even though I've hardly spent any money for the entire night?
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On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her.
Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol
If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me 
However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get.
This video is a good example why:
http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QP
I'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that.
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On January 29 2013 13:06 Alryk wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out. So... asking a best friend to cuddle on a couch, take a nap, and watch a movie together, and then make dinner (at one of our houses/apartments) is not a date? You failed to point out how cuddling on a couch with home movie + making dinner + making out etc. is not a date. What we're saying is that you don't have to spend several hundred dollars a year to show a girl a good time. Where do you get that notion from, and how much money do you make? XD By your own bolded definition, I can come up with probably at least 5 scenarios in as many minutes that cost <50$ and would be kind of strange for 2 guys to do. I'm not debating with your "reverse" method or however you defined it. The specific question I have refers to your bold and this scenario: I just saw my girlfriend last weekend. We spent friday night together, where we went to a restaurant to celebrate her birthday (35$), went home, sat on a couch making out + chatting + whatever for 2 hours, went out to a (free) cabaret concert because it's her birthday, went home. How (in your perception) does that 1) not constitute a date, and 2) not set off a gaydar even though I've hardly spent any money for the entire night?
That's your girlfriend... once you put a label on something, it's entirely different.
And that's what I would call a "Night In" anyway. It's not technically a date, but it's not hanging out either, and it's definitely not something you'd do with a girl you've only known a short while and never dated before. A "Night In" usually occurs once you've already courted the lady and want to show off a little bit. Or, in your case, have a special night with someone you're already dating.
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On January 29 2013 13:19 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:06 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out. So... asking a best friend to cuddle on a couch, take a nap, and watch a movie together, and then make dinner (at one of our houses/apartments) is not a date? You failed to point out how cuddling on a couch with home movie + making dinner + making out etc. is not a date. What we're saying is that you don't have to spend several hundred dollars a year to show a girl a good time. Where do you get that notion from, and how much money do you make? XD By your own bolded definition, I can come up with probably at least 5 scenarios in as many minutes that cost <50$ and would be kind of strange for 2 guys to do. I'm not debating with your "reverse" method or however you defined it. The specific question I have refers to your bold and this scenario: I just saw my girlfriend last weekend. We spent friday night together, where we went to a restaurant to celebrate her birthday (35$), went home, sat on a couch making out + chatting + whatever for 2 hours, went out to a (free) cabaret concert because it's her birthday, went home. How (in your perception) does that 1) not constitute a date, and 2) not set off a gaydar even though I've hardly spent any money for the entire night? That's your girlfriend... once you put a label on something, it's entirely different. And that's what I would call a "Night In" anyway. It's not technically a date, but it's not hanging out either, and it's definitely not something you'd do with a girl you've only known a short while and never dated before. A "Night In" usually occurs once you've already courted the lady and want to show off a little bit. Or, in your case, have a special night with someone you're already dating.
Meh. We will have to agree to disagree, no matter how much I don't see how a date can only be defined as something that costs more than 200$  but seriously; how much do you make??
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On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out.
if you take the person out with intent of courting her and developing a romantic relationship its a date
ig you take the person out jsut to have fun with no romance involved its not a date
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On January 29 2013 13:34 Forikorder wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:On January 28 2013 19:03 vgijamven wrote:+ Show Spoiler +My background: (spoilered to keep the post short) + Show Spoiler +I am a male unkissed virgin, 23 years old. Ever since I hit puberty I’ve been a very quiet and a bit of a anti-social person. Basically I was (and to some extend still am) the term “beta” personified. My looks are average at best, I’m fairly muscular, and I have 0 fashion sense. I spent a lot of my childhood playing games, and I basically spent all of my teenage years playing World of Warcraft with friends from my gymnasium (10 to 12th grade) class.
This has led to me not having many friends at all, altho the few friends that I have I am very close to. And I especially have never had any female friends or any experience in talking to women (besides my sister whom I’m also very close to).
My first encounter with love was brief during summer 2012, where I sort of fell in love with a woman at my summer job, but I quickly learned she was in fact a lesbian (that’s what I get for having a thing for women with short hair, eh?) so that love didn’t really have time to manifest, and I got over it quickly. Looking back, I think I basically fell in love with her because she was the first woman I’ve met who didn’t seem to mind talking to me, and looked at me for more than 0.1 seconds. (Full beta, or what?) So in August, I started a new education to become a .NET Software Engineer. In this class, there is this woman whom I sort of sit next to (one empty chair between us) furthest back in the classroom. I found her interesting from the beginning. During the autumn, I tried to find something to at least exchange some words with her every week, even though I had absolutely no idea how to talk to a girl. This went so-so. Anyhow, when the 3rd course started around the beginning of November, we had a group assignment in which she and I decided to form a group, together with 2 others. This is where we added each other on Skype and really started talking to each other. On Skype, she is very easy to talk to. It’s just as easy as talking to one of my closest friends. We can sometimes spend 1-3 hours talking about different stuff, asking each other questions and discussing stuff. In school it was still difficult to talk to her. Not only because I have no clue how to talk to women, but I also realized after a while that she wasn’t really giving good responses for me to work with, to start up a conversation. Her answers were usually short and concise, and during breaks she seemed more interested in doing stuff on her smartphone and/or computer than talking to me. (To this day, I don’t think she has taken any initiative in starting a face-to-face conversation in school, but she does it all the time in Skype chats.) After about a month, in the beginning of December, (on a Thursday evening) she mentions someone she refers to as her “date” she was going to meet that Friday evening. This is when I realized I was in love with her, as I felt the by now familiar feeling that is love, she had also introduced me to a new feeling – extreme jealousy. That weekend was one of my worst days of my life. Today, I haven’t seen her since 21st of December. She is hardworking and talented, but she’s doesn’t come to school very often. My problem:After Week 7 we are going on internships that last til summer. This means I won’t see her again until the end of August. The mere thought of this is tearing me apart from the inside. I think of her ALL the time. Furthermore, the penultimate/next to last day before we head off to our internships is Valentine’s Day here in Sweden. I can’t make my mind up if I’m gonna confess my feelings to her or not. With the Valentine’s Day timing, it almost feels “destined” to do so. But is there even a point to confessing your feelings to someone who already has a “special somebody”? Or is it even someone special? I have absolutely zero clue what a “date” is, or what her definition of the word is. I have no idea how serious they are in their “relationship”. I know they gave each other Christmas presents, that’s about it. Should I do it for the sake of myself, to hear her reject me so I can move on with my life? I’m 95% certain she has no feelings for me. The two scenarios:Don’t confess – I either “hope” her relationship doesn’t work and/or hope that she develops feelings for me over time. Or I dedicate this time where I won’t meet her to get over my feelings for her. Confess – Which approach do I take? The cautious one “I wanted to say that I like you and am interested in you.”, or do I take the full-hearted approach “I have been in love with you for 2 months. I think about you all the time - you are the first thought when I wake up and the last before I fall asleep.” If you read all this, thank you for your time. I tried to keep it short. Any advice would be appreciated, whatever that might be. I can’t really think straight when it comes to this woman. So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day. That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out. if you take the person out with intent of courting her and developing a romantic relationship its a date ig you take the person out jsut to have fun with no romance involved its not a date
Agreed it's all about the mindset of the 2 people involved, sending the right signals and making the right moves.
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On January 29 2013 13:07 BlazeFury01 wrote:Show nested quote +On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her. Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get. This video is a good example why: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QPI'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that.
Or you could do none of those things, become comfortable in your own skin, and find a girl who digs that. It really isn't that hard, confidence doesn't need a tan or makeup.
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On January 29 2013 13:40 farvacola wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:07 BlazeFury01 wrote:On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her. Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get. This video is a good example why: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QPI'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that. Or you could do none of those things, become comfortable in your own skin, and find a girl who digs that. It really isn't that hard, confidence doesn't need a tan or makeup.
No but the physical attraction to get the girls attention in the first place does. Confidence can't replace ugliness lol unless you have money to back it.
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On January 29 2013 13:46 BlazeFury01 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:40 farvacola wrote:On January 29 2013 13:07 BlazeFury01 wrote:On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her. Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get. This video is a good example why: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QPI'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that. Or you could do none of those things, become comfortable in your own skin, and find a girl who digs that. It really isn't that hard, confidence doesn't need a tan or makeup. No but the physical attraction to get the girls attention in the first place does. Confidence can't replace ugliness lol
You just have to be an average guy and not be like hideous, attitude and personality does the rest.
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On January 29 2013 13:21 Alryk wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:19 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 13:06 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 12:25 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 12:12 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 11:51 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 10:50 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 10:06 Dosey wrote:On January 29 2013 09:42 Alryk wrote:On January 29 2013 09:29 Dosey wrote:
[quote]
So... You've been talking to this girl for a while and haven't even found out for sure if she's single or not? That's usually one of the first three topics of discussion when talking to a female you are interested in (unless at a club/bar, because you don't want to know then). I'm afraid you don't even know enough about this girl to be in love with her, hell, I don't even believe you know what "love" is. What this sounds like is a case of infatuation with her because she's actually given you the time of day.
That said, just ask her out. The worst she can say is no. Skype, text, in person, whatever. If she's more talkative on Skype, that's your best bet because maybe she has the same problem as you in person. This "man" shit some of these guys are spouting is nonsense. If a girl likes you, they don't give a fuck how you ask them out. If she's so superficial as to say "Oh, he didn't ask me out in person. He's not MAN enough for me!" then maybe she isn't for you...? I might have exaggerated the "bad" part of asking her out on skype, but you're underexaggerating it... having the balls to ask somebody in person is always much better than sending them a message where you can crawl into a corner if you get rejected. If we're spouting about how confidence attracts women, starting a relationship in a way that give you a "get away from the conversation free" card isn't the best way to do it. Either confidence attracts women, or it doesn't. If it does, then you should be as confident as possible from the get go - i.e. talk to her face to face. Now, if for some reason you both absolutely fail at human conversation, then people go to skype sometimes. But generally, face to face is considered better. Although I do agree that it is infatuation. It's pretty hard to go from never having dated somebody to totally in love that quickly imo. The way he described her and the way she talks to him on skype/in person. Skype is absolutely his best bet. If he gets her where they are both uncomfortable, it creates the least favorable situation for the both of them. Asking a girl out isn't just about confidence. It's about being able to read the situations properly and executing your objective based on your reads. Much like sales. But if he can't ask her out on person, how is he supposed to go on a full-out date in person? Even if it's something as simple as coffee 1 on 1. He's going to have to face her in person sooner or later, and if he can't ask her out like that, it will just make for an awkward date. Getting the "yes" is the first step. It doesn't matter how he gets it. The next part (a successful "date") is totally up to him. Personally, I don't consider anything less than a $200 night at a restaurant a date. Everything else is just two friends hanging out/feeling each other out. If he just looks at it that way, that might take some pressure off as well. I'm sorry some of arn't rich and have boat loads of cash to throw at girls who we may never see again. Money shouldn't be the deciding factor, ever, if it's a date or not. You misunderstand. I don't tag it a date simply because of the money. I tag something a date if it's something formal, because "date" just sounds formal to me and a nice restaurant is pretty damn formal. When I go out on a "date" I like to show a girl a good time, so I'm expecting to spend a couple hundred dollars doing so. Anything else, I just consider hanging out. Movies, coffee, pizza, club, casino, home, etc.. That's all just hanging out, enjoying each others company to me. If you call your guy friend up and say "Hey meet me at starbucks and then we'll go and see The Hobbit after" Would you consider that a date? No, of course not. So why is it suddenly a date if there is a female involved? Now if I say to my friend "Hey, I got reservations for two at this nice restaurant, want to come?" That might set off someones gaydar, because that's a date. tl;dr If you can't ask your guy friend to do the same thing, then it's a date. If you can, then it's not a date and simply just hanging out. So... asking a best friend to cuddle on a couch, take a nap, and watch a movie together, and then make dinner (at one of our houses/apartments) is not a date? You failed to point out how cuddling on a couch with home movie + making dinner + making out etc. is not a date. What we're saying is that you don't have to spend several hundred dollars a year to show a girl a good time. Where do you get that notion from, and how much money do you make? XD By your own bolded definition, I can come up with probably at least 5 scenarios in as many minutes that cost <50$ and would be kind of strange for 2 guys to do. I'm not debating with your "reverse" method or however you defined it. The specific question I have refers to your bold and this scenario: I just saw my girlfriend last weekend. We spent friday night together, where we went to a restaurant to celebrate her birthday (35$), went home, sat on a couch making out + chatting + whatever for 2 hours, went out to a (free) cabaret concert because it's her birthday, went home. How (in your perception) does that 1) not constitute a date, and 2) not set off a gaydar even though I've hardly spent any money for the entire night? That's your girlfriend... once you put a label on something, it's entirely different. And that's what I would call a "Night In" anyway. It's not technically a date, but it's not hanging out either, and it's definitely not something you'd do with a girl you've only known a short while and never dated before. A "Night In" usually occurs once you've already courted the lady and want to show off a little bit. Or, in your case, have a special night with someone you're already dating. Meh. We will have to agree to disagree, no matter how much I don't see how a date can only be defined as something that costs more than 200$ but seriously; how much do you make??
So far this year I've made $15,000...and that's mildly low compared to what I want if that helps give you an idea.
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On January 29 2013 11:28 FeUerFlieGe wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 10:40 Kich wrote:
Not that great. I have absolutely no fear talking to girls, I'm as confident in myself as I need to be, I'm fairly handsome, have a successful career, super nice, most people tell me I'm very funny, awesome friend to all my friends.
Girls just aren't that into me. I even dress nice and shit. The last.. dozen or so girls I've dated / tried to date have friendzoned me before the first date, after the first date (which always seems to go fine), and over half of them have gotten back together with ex's.
In fact, most of the time so far they've gone back to an ex-boyfriend in the first 2 weeks of knowing me. That's some shit.
I dunno what to do really, might try online dating. I'm 23, my job doesn't give me a lot of free time to meet women (software engineer living far away from where I want to be). You're 23? You need to go to your local clubs and bars and start meeting women. By meeting I mean building instant attraction with them, and sleeping with them within the first few days of knowing them. Most people decide they are attracted to a member of the opposite sex within a few seconds of meeting them or even when they first see them. Other times it may take a few minutes to an hour before the attraction builds. It's not all about looks either but more the way you compose yourself. So what does this mean? This means you can go out and meet women, find the ones you are attracted to, see if they are attracted to you (no means no), keep that attractive frame that attracted her in the first place, set up a date if it's not logistically possible to hang with her right then, and then keep pushing for what you want (sex; yes we all want sex. Even she wants sex... with the right guy of course), but remember that if she gets a little freaked out or uncomfortable, you can always back off. (it shows you know what your doing and you understand your limits, also attractive). Do this enough and you can date multiple women, find one you really really like, choose her among the others, and have a nice relationship with stunning girl!
Thanks, it's just kinda brutal--I work one place 4 days a week, on fridays I drive home to meet with friends. Some of my friends are still in college, so I go to parties occasionally, just recently started trying to pick up girls there. I always feel a little out of place though at a house party since I've graduated, but it wasn't that long ago so I'm still pretty young looking.
So, dating is hard because my fridays and sundays are consumed by driving, and quite frankly I fucking hate clubs.
I'm not really into the super slutty girls, I was actually just recently asked to go home with two pretty hot girls but it just seemed kinda sketchy so I passed...
So maybe more accurately--the sort of girl I'm into dresses nicely and rocks scarves like a boss. I have a particular taste and I'm willing to compromise a lot of easy sex to focus on that. Though I haven't had sex in awhile, so now I'm sort of thinking I should probably keep up with that to some degree.
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On January 29 2013 13:46 Zooper31 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:46 BlazeFury01 wrote:On January 29 2013 13:40 farvacola wrote:On January 29 2013 13:07 BlazeFury01 wrote:On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her. Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get. This video is a good example why: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QPI'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that. Or you could do none of those things, become comfortable in your own skin, and find a girl who digs that. It really isn't that hard, confidence doesn't need a tan or makeup. No but the physical attraction to get the girls attention in the first place does. Confidence can't replace ugliness lol You just have to be an average guy and not be like hideous, attitude and personality does the rest.
Sometimes it does, it depends on her situation though. But if you're an average guy who's to say that a guy who's above average wouldn't take your girl? Just saying.
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United States41984 Posts
On January 29 2013 13:50 BlazeFury01 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 29 2013 13:46 Zooper31 wrote:On January 29 2013 13:46 BlazeFury01 wrote:On January 29 2013 13:40 farvacola wrote:On January 29 2013 13:07 BlazeFury01 wrote:On October 09 2011 15:47 Mr. Nefarious wrote:
Unfortunately, most of the better looking girls are extremely selfish and vain. Drop these girls, looks are only fun for the first month. Find the girl you find attractive emotionally as well as physically, despite what other people might say or think about her. Actually they're not bro. If you have muscles, money and are good looking, it's not hard at all lol If you aren't so good looking, then the only advice I can give you is to try to make yourself as good looking as possible. Get some muscle (a 6 pack absolutely makes a girl melt because very few guys have it) straight white teeth for a nice smile, naturally looking colored contacts if you don't have attractive eyes. Always stay well groomed with a nice edge up on the goatee or hair line. Pressed pants with the crease in the middle and starched shirts. Show off your muscles as much as you can because this really does grab a girls attention. If your pale, tan. If you have bad acne wear a little bit of make up powder to reduce the redness (not too much because then she'll know). Nice jewelry is also an eye grabber too. Like a nice watch and bracelet. Always make sure your body language shows nothing but confidence and make sure your tone of voice is always sexy, suave and smooth. Make sure your words are enticing and your vocabulary is top notch. Stay up to date on the news too and into the latest celebrity gossip. This will always give you something to talk about with your girl because chances are she'll be into all this. Just some tips from me However, I do advise getting to know the girl as deep as you can before engaging in sexual intercourse or even kissing her for that matter, regardless of how desperate you get. This video is a good example why: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhmTaktRx93s7ec2QPI'm saving it for Mr. Right...Get outta here! I mean, I even have met some really hot hunnies that do exactly what she does. Don't be fooled! Hell, Kim Kardashian is a good example of that. Or you could do none of those things, become comfortable in your own skin, and find a girl who digs that. It really isn't that hard, confidence doesn't need a tan or makeup. No but the physical attraction to get the girls attention in the first place does. Confidence can't replace ugliness lol You just have to be an average guy and not be like hideous, attitude and personality does the rest. Sometimes it does, it depends on her situation though. But if you're an average guy who's to say that a guy who's above average wouldn't take your girl? Just saying.
If she's your girl, nobody is taking her. If someone takes her, clearly wasn't your girl. Make her your girl and she won't give a shit about anyone else. If she's just waiting for someone better to come along then you've fucked up somewhere.
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EPT
