EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 913
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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LegalLord
United States13779 Posts
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Skynx
Turkey7150 Posts
On January 26 2017 01:03 LemOn wrote: Yeah that's all nice guys - don't date this don't date that but ... What about True Love? The tv series? What about it? | ||
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VHbb
692 Posts
 After that, I wrote her 2-3 times but I got no answer (6 days have passed now) - should I just move on right? It's a pity because I had a very nice time, but I don't want to wast my time.. I find this very very odd when I think about the evening we spent but well, it was just a first meeting P.s. btw first time I ever went out with a girl met online | ||
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Danglars
United States12133 Posts
On February 01 2017 07:10 VHbb wrote: So, I went out with a girl I met via tinder, for a drink. We have a very nice time, we talk nonstop for 3 hours and I feel we really connect on many things (passions, work, politics, hobbies, ...). At the end of the night we kiss, and it's a really good kiss After that, I wrote her 2-3 times but I got no answer (6 days have passed now) - should I just move on right? It's a pity because I had a very nice time, but I don't want to wast my time.. I find this very very odd when I think about the evening we spent but well, it was just a first meeting P.s. btw first time I ever went out with a girl met online That's the clue. You'll probably never know if she wasn't looking for something serious/long term, was really looking for some other type of guy, or whatever, but that's life. Start the app back up! | ||
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VHbb
692 Posts
On February 01 2017 07:36 Danglars wrote: That's the clue. You'll probably never know if she wasn't looking for something serious/long term, was really looking for some other type of guy, or whatever, but that's life. Start the app back up! Thanks for the advice !I must say, I have never used online dating and I've always been somehow "judgemental" (is that a word? I hope so  ) of it, I don't know exactly why (perhaps because no one among my friends uses it openly, and we never talk about it..). However it has been quite fun so far: it's interesting to meet people *completely* outside of my usual circles of friends/coworkers, with which in principle I have little to do.(I'm not so good at "dating" girls, so this is also helping me: my main problem, if we want to call it a problem, is that I end up becoming a good friend with the girls I know. I'm usually ok with it since I'm not always looking for a relationship, but I feel that when I want to I'm not very "smooth" in letting the girl know that I'm not just looking for an other friend) | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
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Danglars
United States12133 Posts
On February 01 2017 07:49 VHbb wrote: Thanks for the advice !I must say, I have never used online dating and I've always been somehow "judgemental" (is that a word? I hope so ) of it, I don't know exactly why (perhaps because no one among my friends uses it openly, and we never talk about it..). However it has been quite fun so far: it's interesting to meet people *completely* outside of my usual circles of friends/coworkers, with which in principle I have little to do.(I'm not so good at "dating" girls, so this is also helping me: my main problem, if we want to call it a problem, is that I end up becoming a good friend with the girls I know. I'm usually ok with it since I'm not always looking for a relationship, but I feel that when I want to I'm not very "smooth" in letting the girl know that I'm not just looking for an other friend) I spent many years only dating women through shared acquaintances or group activities because up to around around ten years ago online dating had such a stigma attached to it. It's mostly faded now, and yes some people back then paid no attention to the stigma. But it used to be that you had to be very hard-up man indeed to turn to online dating. My friend only last year chose to lie to everyone but her closest friends that her and her fiance met at the gym and not online. I really think it's much more of a positive thing and those apps have come a long way. I can count two long relationships that were fun and close that started with the app messaging. | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
Speaking of which I've met an awesome girl. I honestly might have found an emotionally healthy one y'all. Let's see if I manage to have a norm al relationship for once. | ||
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twofish
15 Posts
For a few years now, I haven't really gotten anywhere with girls, supposedly mainly due to a lack of trying. At times I've blamed it on factors such as studying a heavily male-dominated subject and having mostly male hobbies, but those are mainly convenient excuses. From various other activities, I've also been exposed to a few interesting women, but just never tried initiating anything on my own, but instead passively hoped for something to magically happen (but ofc nothing did). For a long time, I haven't really been bothered by the lack of action, but as of late I feel like it'd be nice to have somebody at my side. Now last week I was away at an internal conference in my field. After dinner, there was a networking apéro. I was talking with a few pals, standing awkwardly close to the kicker table nearby, eyeing the games from time to time and hoping to play with a buddy. A lone girl was also alternating between eyeing the table and her general vicinity and eventually asked me to play with her. We had a blast and initially destroyed the competition, but then also lost after a few more intense games. Afterwards, we sat down and effortlessly chatted for another two hours and then said good night. The next day during the morning coffee break, she reliably picked me up again to go play a few more games. After another short session the conference ended around lunch-time, and I went snowboarding with my pals, whereas she preferred cross-country skiing. However, we made loose plans to meet again later at the hotel, and maybe go to the sauna or play another round of games. When we got back to the hotel, she was already there, enjoying the sauna. We had a good time, collectively choosing to head home a few hours later than planned, and having pleasant conversations on the way. Then, after having wasted half of Sunday already, I decided to write her again. I didn't quite understand my intentions and feelings, but simply thought to myself 'why not'. So I suggested going ice skating, to which she gladly agreed, meeting me there joyfully despite having walked there through the rain for quite a while. After skating for a bit, I couldn't resist grabbing hockey sticks and introducing her to the basics, to which she again obliged. Afterwards, we walked through the rain back to her place where she invited me for tea. Somehow this ended up with me staying over and talking from the early evening until 02:30 am before heading home. Now, even though I guess I could say that things went surprisingly well, I have trouble sorting out my feelings, probably mainly due to a lack of experience. On one hand, I think we understand each other quite well and have a lot in common. Also, she has many of the qualities that I think I am looking for in a girl. But then again, neither of us has initiated anything physical at all so far. I'm not even sure if I'm attracted to her or not. I guess I'm just excited that finally something is happening, although I really can't judge where this is going - friendship or more? I guess I'll just have to see and find out The following might now sound very arrogant, but one thought that has been nagging me now is that I've never really tried to figure out my market value so to say. Am I now just falling for the first girl due to sheer laziness? Would it be equally simple with other girls? I simply can't tell, mainly because I've never even tried :/ I'm not sure what to think, but maybe one of you has some good thoughts on this? | ||
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Uldridge
Belgium5237 Posts
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DickMcFanny
Ireland1076 Posts
Between Tinder and OKC I've now lain with about 80 women, give or take five, and there is no more joy in it. You read these OKC profiles and it looks like all girls are either in open relationships, looking for ONS exclusively, or looking for non-monogamous relationships. Which I don't mind, but which isn't my cup of tea. I think I'll be a bit happier once I delete my OKC account and focus on myself for a while. Once I'm a bit less miserable, things should get easier. | ||
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evilfatsh1t
Australia8943 Posts
On February 07 2017 07:10 twofish wrote: Warning: The following are some incoherent ramblings which I've written primarily in the hope of better figuring out my own thoughts. For a few years now, I haven't really gotten anywhere with girls, supposedly mainly due to a lack of trying. At times I've blamed it on factors such as studying a heavily male-dominated subject and having mostly male hobbies, but those are mainly convenient excuses. From various other activities, I've also been exposed to a few interesting women, but just never tried initiating anything on my own, but instead passively hoped for something to magically happen (but ofc nothing did). For a long time, I haven't really been bothered by the lack of action, but as of late I feel like it'd be nice to have somebody at my side. Now last week I was away at an internal conference in my field. After dinner, there was a networking apéro. I was talking with a few pals, standing awkwardly close to the kicker table nearby, eyeing the games from time to time and hoping to play with a buddy. A lone girl was also alternating between eyeing the table and her general vicinity and eventually asked me to play with her. We had a blast and initially destroyed the competition, but then also lost after a few more intense games. Afterwards, we sat down and effortlessly chatted for another two hours and then said good night. The next day during the morning coffee break, she reliably picked me up again to go play a few more games. After another short session the conference ended around lunch-time, and I went snowboarding with my pals, whereas she preferred cross-country skiing. However, we made loose plans to meet again later at the hotel, and maybe go to the sauna or play another round of games. When we got back to the hotel, she was already there, enjoying the sauna. We had a good time, collectively choosing to head home a few hours later than planned, and having pleasant conversations on the way. Then, after having wasted half of Sunday already, I decided to write her again. I didn't quite understand my intentions and feelings, but simply thought to myself 'why not'. So I suggested going ice skating, to which she gladly agreed, meeting me there joyfully despite having walked there through the rain for quite a while. After skating for a bit, I couldn't resist grabbing hockey sticks and introducing her to the basics, to which she again obliged. Afterwards, we walked through the rain back to her place where she invited me for tea. Somehow this ended up with me staying over and talking from the early evening until 02:30 am before heading home. Now, even though I guess I could say that things went surprisingly well, I have trouble sorting out my feelings, probably mainly due to a lack of experience. On one hand, I think we understand each other quite well and have a lot in common. Also, she has many of the qualities that I think I am looking for in a girl. But then again, neither of us has initiated anything physical at all so far. I'm not even sure if I'm attracted to her or not. I guess I'm just excited that finally something is happening, although I really can't judge where this is going - friendship or more? I guess I'll just have to see and find out The following might now sound very arrogant, but one thought that has been nagging me now is that I've never really tried to figure out my market value so to say. Am I now just falling for the first girl due to sheer laziness? Would it be equally simple with other girls? I simply can't tell, mainly because I've never even tried :/ I'm not sure what to think, but maybe one of you has some good thoughts on this? if youre attracted to her and she is what youre looking for in a partner then make a move. judging by the amount of talking and other activities you have done with her you should already have an idea of whether she enjoys your company and would like to take it further. worst case scenario you get friend zoned | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
On February 07 2017 08:16 DickMcFanny wrote: Hookup culture is really starting to get me down. It's all just so soulless.. Between Tinder and OKC I've now lain with about 80 women, give or take five, and there is no more joy in it. You read these OKC profiles and it looks like all girls are either in open relationships, looking for ONS exclusively, or looking for non-monogamous relationships. Which I don't mind, but which isn't my cup of tea. I think I'll be a bit happier once I delete my OKC account and focus on myself for a while. Once I'm a bit less miserable, things should get easier. Just out of curiosity but how long have you been 'taking part' of the hookup culture? I occassionally splurge but when I see some of my friends who have been doing that shit for years on end all I can think is better make sure that's me in a couple of years... What's stopping you from not doing it though? Nobody that's completely happy/satisfied lives like that (me included) IMO. Oh and Twofish: make a move man. You're in doubt now but I promise you'll regret it once it's no longer an option. | ||
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DickMcFanny
Ireland1076 Posts
On February 07 2017 12:28 B.I.G. wrote: Just out of curiosity but how long have you been 'taking part' of the hookup culture? I occassionally splurge but when I see some of my friends who have been doing that shit for years on end all I can think is better make sure that's me in a couple of years... What's stopping you from not doing it though? Nobody that's completely happy/satisfied lives like that (me included) IMO. Oh and Twofish: make a move man. You're in doubt now but I promise you'll regret it once it's no longer an option. Hmm, about four years maybe, though with a break. I should just stop as long as I don't have any STDs or gotten someone pregnant. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On February 07 2017 07:10 twofish wrote:The following might now sound very arrogant, but one thought that has been nagging me now is that I've never really tried to figure out my market value so to say. Am I now just falling for the first girl due to sheer laziness? Would it be equally simple with other girls? I simply can't tell, mainly because I've never even tried :/ I'm not sure what to think, but maybe one of you has some good thoughts on this? I don't think you should "find out your market value". Sounds a real bullshit "the grass is greener on the other side" thing, simply because you have started to get attention from one girl. I definitely think you should keep seeing her. When/if it goes bad you can find out your market value. However that entire thing is kinda messed up, date people who you think are attractive and have a awesome personality! | ||
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Dark_Chill
Canada3353 Posts
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Pipes
9 Posts
Three months ago I posted here that my girlfriend for 3 years just broke up with me. The next two months was one hell of a roller-coaster ride of me trying to get back with her, giving up, then her trying to will me on winning her back and me not caring anymore, then try to win her back "again". We never did get back together and now after 3 months (kudos to her for following the 3 month rule of not getting a boyfriend after a breakup), she now has a new boyfriend. Mind you, I only found out because one of our mutual friends sent me a picture of her with his new guy kissing her. To be honest, I'm surprised at myself for not being affected emotionally anymore and I just genuinely wish for her happiness and hope that it works out for her. I've also been on tinder the past 2 weeks and got dozens and dozens of matches. However, the tinder scene here in my country is so very lame and I only got to meet four girls, and none of them were my type after the 1st date. (I was duped by their pictures, LOL) Right now, I'm seeing this girl who I've known from my previous work but really just got to know her for the past week. The sad thing is, she's going back to her hometown 500 miles away from here at the end of the month and she's never coming back. So there's no point committing in an LDR. I decided to continue to see this girl until she leaves, because I like her a lot, and the sex is amazing. After that though, I'm not sure what to do next. Sorry about the rant, just needed to get this off my chest. | ||
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twofish
15 Posts
. Since it's pretty clear that we enjoy each others company I guess I'll just continue meeting her, probing a little bit further, and see where that leads to.@Pipes: Sounds like you're already mostly over the hill, so I suppose that things will probably start improving really soon. Hang in there! | ||
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Titusmaster6
United States5937 Posts
On February 08 2017 07:16 Pipes wrote: Hey guys. Three months ago I posted here that my girlfriend for 3 years just broke up with me. The next two months was one hell of a roller-coaster ride of me trying to get back with her, giving up, then her trying to will me on winning her back and me not caring anymore, then try to win her back "again". We never did get back together and now after 3 months (kudos to her for following the 3 month rule of not getting a boyfriend after a breakup), she now has a new boyfriend. Mind you, I only found out because one of our mutual friends sent me a picture of her with his new guy kissing her. To be honest, I'm surprised at myself for not being affected emotionally anymore and I just genuinely wish for her happiness and hope that it works out for her. I've also been on tinder the past 2 weeks and got dozens and dozens of matches. However, the tinder scene here in my country is so very lame and I only got to meet four girls, and none of them were my type after the 1st date. (I was duped by their pictures, LOL) Right now, I'm seeing this girl who I've known from my previous work but really just got to know her for the past week. The sad thing is, she's going back to her hometown 500 miles away from here at the end of the month and she's never coming back. So there's no point committing in an LDR. I decided to continue to see this girl until she leaves, because I like her a lot, and the sex is amazing. After that though, I'm not sure what to do next. Sorry about the rant, just needed to get this off my chest. GL brother everything sounds chill! Stay happy! | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
Make a move bruh | ||
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