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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
I never had an actual wet one And I'm a horny fucker :D
Btw went on mini-date - mini flower bouquet, children's meals, small lemonades, dessert, mini booze bottle with mini shots and mini playing cards in a small box (I'm a poker pro ). Then we came to mine, but it was no so much a mini date anymore. Some slippage occurred and we went to buy a plan-b pill at the pharmacy together then for dinner after the experience (I pay for pills, she paid for ribs, chicken wings and beer - sounds like a good deal to me)
And then when I saw her some 3 days later she was acting well strange, in a funny way, hyperactive, horny at first, then not horny at all when we got really tired, but was in a weird teasing mood - apparently these pills are hormone overload, I'm pretty sure there was a correlation even though she just said she acts funny when she's tired
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On October 31 2015 04:08 CJPD wrote:Show nested quote +On October 30 2015 11:33 The_Masked_Shrimp wrote:On October 30 2015 08:25 CJPD wrote: hi guys. Dont't know wtf is wrong with some girls, asked a girl if she wanted to go out, she's from another country and i thought to show her the city, she said yes and gives me her phone, but when i called her or texted her she didnt even answered me. Why did she gave her phone number if she didnt wanted to answer me. Im a straight shooter and when i asked her why didnt she give me a reply she said i was pressuring her too much, wtf 1 text msg and 1 unanswered phone call is pressure?! Please just tell me yes, no or fuck off why the hell dont some girls can say 1 of those 3. Asked another one if she wanted to go out but she said she has a boyfriend, but we can go out as friends.
How is my dating luck? My luck is in the gutter. Well it all depends on the timescale. When is that you messaged her after you asked her? How much time passed by before you asked why she didn't answer? If the later is less than 2 days (two full sleep nights after the message), then it would just be an insecurity problem on your part. A lot of girls are not straight shooters, they change their minds/emotions so fast it's kind of like small kids. It's very common for them to just stop contact without giving a reason (not that anybody owes anything to anyone; but it should be the adult way to spontaneously say something when you go back on a previous engagement, even if it's a small one like "yeah sure I'll hang out with you"). And any attempt to get a reason/explanation/adult discussion about that is perceived by them as bullshit/pressure. Also you should make sure you are actually not putting pressure. Asking up front "why don't you answer me?" is very aggressive especially after just a text, she could just have forgotten about your single text or could have been in a busy period, who knows. Obviously not on the same day as the first text you sent, instead of asking vindictively for answers right away, just check more casually "Hi, how are you today?" if she is really ignoring you or not. If no answer and you REALLY like her, give it another shot the following week and then be done with it. You should not want to have anything to do with that kind of girls, ever. And "girls" is the appropriate word, they are not women yet and need to grow up. If a girl ignores you for a sensible amount of time you should just move on and assume that, whatever the reason, she obviously don't want to speak to you (that is the reason, you don't need to ask why), so why would you want anything to do with someone that doesn't want anything to do with you? Then if she contacts you back after some time it is your call to go for it or not. I didnt pressured her tried to call and text 4 days after she gave me the phone number, and only asked her why she didnt answer 5 days after i phoned her, because it was my last day in the place she works (im a security guard/ private security) all i ever wanted was a yes, no or fuck off. when i called her i guess she was not doing nothing, because she left work earlier then me, tried it around dinner time 20h30m / 21h00. Sometimes chicks just can't figure out there minds. Show nested quote +On October 30 2015 16:51 bloodwhore~ wrote:On October 30 2015 08:25 CJPD wrote: hi guys. Dont't know wtf is wrong with some girls, asked a girl if she wanted to go out, she's from another country and i thought to show her the city, she said yes and gives me her phone, but when i called her or texted her she didnt even answered me. Why did she gave her phone number if she didnt wanted to answer me. Im a straight shooter and when i asked her why didnt she give me a reply she said i was pressuring her too much, wtf 1 text msg and 1 unanswered phone call is pressure?! Please just tell me yes, no or fuck off why the hell dont some girls can say 1 of those 3. Asked another one if she wanted to go out but she said she has a boyfriend, but we can go out as friends.
How is my dating luck? My luck is in the gutter. Why even bother with her then? Because shes hot and i dont really know if she wants side action or just be a friend.
You might come off as pressuring/intimidating so she was not sure how you would react if she declined you on the spot?
Your posts here seem rather annoyed/frustrated and adding onto the fact you're probably larger than her (as a security guard) so perhaps her accepting and changing her mind is her way of avoiding a potential dangerous situation that happens if she declines you on the spot.
Side note. If a girl told every guy she was disinterested to 'fuck off' how long do you think before she gets hit, stalked, harassed, or otherwise negatively affected by being 'straight forward'.
Not saying you would (or wouldn't) harm a girl. Although the fact there are others out there that would is enough for them to have to worry about it.
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On November 01 2015 23:48 Yoz wrote:Show nested quote +On October 31 2015 04:08 CJPD wrote:On October 30 2015 11:33 The_Masked_Shrimp wrote:On October 30 2015 08:25 CJPD wrote: hi guys. Dont't know wtf is wrong with some girls, asked a girl if she wanted to go out, she's from another country and i thought to show her the city, she said yes and gives me her phone, but when i called her or texted her she didnt even answered me. Why did she gave her phone number if she didnt wanted to answer me. Im a straight shooter and when i asked her why didnt she give me a reply she said i was pressuring her too much, wtf 1 text msg and 1 unanswered phone call is pressure?! Please just tell me yes, no or fuck off why the hell dont some girls can say 1 of those 3. Asked another one if she wanted to go out but she said she has a boyfriend, but we can go out as friends.
How is my dating luck? My luck is in the gutter. Well it all depends on the timescale. When is that you messaged her after you asked her? How much time passed by before you asked why she didn't answer? If the later is less than 2 days (two full sleep nights after the message), then it would just be an insecurity problem on your part. A lot of girls are not straight shooters, they change their minds/emotions so fast it's kind of like small kids. It's very common for them to just stop contact without giving a reason (not that anybody owes anything to anyone; but it should be the adult way to spontaneously say something when you go back on a previous engagement, even if it's a small one like "yeah sure I'll hang out with you"). And any attempt to get a reason/explanation/adult discussion about that is perceived by them as bullshit/pressure. Also you should make sure you are actually not putting pressure. Asking up front "why don't you answer me?" is very aggressive especially after just a text, she could just have forgotten about your single text or could have been in a busy period, who knows. Obviously not on the same day as the first text you sent, instead of asking vindictively for answers right away, just check more casually "Hi, how are you today?" if she is really ignoring you or not. If no answer and you REALLY like her, give it another shot the following week and then be done with it. You should not want to have anything to do with that kind of girls, ever. And "girls" is the appropriate word, they are not women yet and need to grow up. If a girl ignores you for a sensible amount of time you should just move on and assume that, whatever the reason, she obviously don't want to speak to you (that is the reason, you don't need to ask why), so why would you want anything to do with someone that doesn't want anything to do with you? Then if she contacts you back after some time it is your call to go for it or not. I didnt pressured her tried to call and text 4 days after she gave me the phone number, and only asked her why she didnt answer 5 days after i phoned her, because it was my last day in the place she works (im a security guard/ private security) all i ever wanted was a yes, no or fuck off. when i called her i guess she was not doing nothing, because she left work earlier then me, tried it around dinner time 20h30m / 21h00. Sometimes chicks just can't figure out there minds. On October 30 2015 16:51 bloodwhore~ wrote:On October 30 2015 08:25 CJPD wrote: hi guys. Dont't know wtf is wrong with some girls, asked a girl if she wanted to go out, she's from another country and i thought to show her the city, she said yes and gives me her phone, but when i called her or texted her she didnt even answered me. Why did she gave her phone number if she didnt wanted to answer me. Im a straight shooter and when i asked her why didnt she give me a reply she said i was pressuring her too much, wtf 1 text msg and 1 unanswered phone call is pressure?! Please just tell me yes, no or fuck off why the hell dont some girls can say 1 of those 3. Asked another one if she wanted to go out but she said she has a boyfriend, but we can go out as friends.
How is my dating luck? My luck is in the gutter. Why even bother with her then? Because shes hot and i dont really know if she wants side action or just be a friend. You might come off as pressuring/intimidating so she was not sure how you would react if she declined you on the spot? Your posts here seem rather annoyed/frustrated and adding onto the fact you're probably larger than her (as a security guard) so perhaps her accepting and changing her mind is her way of avoiding a potential dangerous situation that happens if she declines you on the spot. Side note. If a girl told every guy she was disinterested to 'fuck off' how long do you think before she gets hit, stalked, harassed, or otherwise negatively affected by being 'straight forward'. Not saying you would (or wouldn't) harm a girl. Although the fact there are others out there that would is enough for them to have to worry about it. Several years ago I stopped trying to get girls numbers when I was interested. Instead, I give them mine. I put the ball in their court. It's an easy way to know if they're interested in any way or not, because if you never hear from them again, you know they weren't interested at all.
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So the date went well, talked had fun over crepes, and after it ended she said she wasnt looking for a relationship 'cause work (senior year, jobs, projects, etc. etc.) but that she'd be happy to go out on more dates so I dunno what any of this means.
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Met a chick at a halloween party while I was drunk and high out of my mind. We danced and talked a bunch but she actually seemed interesting to talk to, really smart and insightful, and now that I'm sober I actually want to get to know her normally. Not a humblebrag. I'm really confused about what to do when my first impression was alright (least in my eyes) but not too... coherent.
Any advice on whether I should and what to do? I remember about half the conversation. Mostly the big bullet points.
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On November 02 2015 04:29 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: Met a chick at a halloween party while I was drunk and high out of my mind. We danced and talked a bunch but she actually seemed interesting to talk to, really smart and insightful, and now that I'm sober I actually want to get to know her normally.
Any advice on whether I should and what to do? I remember about half the conversation. Mostly the big bullet points. Ask her on a date?
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On November 02 2015 04:30 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On November 02 2015 04:29 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: Met a chick at a halloween party while I was drunk and high out of my mind. We danced and talked a bunch but she actually seemed interesting to talk to, really smart and insightful, and now that I'm sober I actually want to get to know her normally.
Any advice on whether I should and what to do? I remember about half the conversation. Mostly the big bullet points. Ask her on a date? I guess my real question is, is there anything I should be aware of when she's only seen me on the verge of blacking out.
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@CJPD Don't bother hoping/asking/waiting for any clarification from most women. Unless you guys have been together she doesn't owe you any either. All you need to know is if she is in to you or not.
I know how frustrating it can be if a girl seems to lose interest out of nowhere but that's just the way it goes. 'Pressuring' her is going to get you naught but frustration and frankly will only make you look desperate. Girl suddenly wants to get off the CJPD train? Fine. Swallow your anger. Next. Choo chooooooo
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On November 02 2015 04:32 [UoN]Sentinel wrote: I guess my real question is, is there anything I should be aware of when she's only seen me on the verge of blacking out. Well I don't think it really matters. If she has a bad impression of you I don't think you can say much to change that. Maybe a joke like "Although I was almost blacking out I remember you were 'your compliments here' and I would like to take you on a date" could work but on the other hand that could make it worse too.
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Hit her up. Apparently I'm actually nicer when I'm drunk! So we'll see how that unfolds.
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On November 02 2015 04:22 Zambrah wrote:So the date went well, talked had fun over crepes, and after it ended she said she wasnt looking for a relationship 'cause work (senior year, jobs, projects, etc. etc.) but that she'd be happy to go out on more dates so I dunno what any of this means.  that means shes probably just looking to fuck tbh
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I made the choice of laying of tinder when I had my exam period due to not enough time but as I felt like it would be annoying to date multiple people at the same time. I have reconsidered a bit.
Although I really want to date the girl I've gone on two dates with now I don't want to put all of my eggs in the same basket. I tried setting up a another date with her yesterday but I haven't gotten an answer except that she couldn't the day I suggested. I'm not sure if this "only talking in real unless you are setting up a date" is for me either, the pace is really slow for my taste. Maybe that is how some girls are but I'm not sure I want that.
My friend has mentioned that her girlfriend said she had a "wife" for me (inside joke about me "trying finding a wife") . She had the same name as the last girl they talked about so I'm not sure if it's the same one or a new one. I will try to lurk more about it.
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On November 02 2015 04:22 Zambrah wrote:So the date went well, talked had fun over crepes, and after it ended she said she wasnt looking for a relationship 'cause work (senior year, jobs, projects, etc. etc.) but that she'd be happy to go out on more dates so I dunno what any of this means.  Sounds like you're 100% in!
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On November 02 2015 07:50 arb wrote:Show nested quote +On November 02 2015 04:22 Zambrah wrote:So the date went well, talked had fun over crepes, and after it ended she said she wasnt looking for a relationship 'cause work (senior year, jobs, projects, etc. etc.) but that she'd be happy to go out on more dates so I dunno what any of this means.  that means shes probably just looking to fuck tbh
I think its more about making sure she spends enough time on work since shes an insanely dedicated worker and everyone around here is at least mildly panicking about making sure we're all hirable and can land solid jobs, but I dunno for sure, lol.
Well, if shes open to more dates all I can really do is oblige right? I'd like to go see Crimson Peak since I havent seen a movie in... months.
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United States43967 Posts
See The Martian instead. You won't regret that choice.
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On November 02 2015 08:59 KwarK wrote: See The Martian instead. You won't regret that choice.
Im so loyal to 'ol Guillermo though, plus we're art students and I've heard its a really gorgeous movie.
Honestly there are a bunch of movies I wanna see right now, which sucks cause I can't see most of 'em. :/
Crimson Peak Goosebumps (dont judge me) Sicario The Martian Bridge of Spies
Eh, well, if she doesnt wanna see a scary movie (evidently shes easy to scare) there are plenty of options at least.
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On November 02 2015 08:07 bloodwhore~ wrote: I made the choice of laying of tinder when I had my exam period due to not enough time but as I felt like it would be annoying to date multiple people at the same time. I have reconsidered a bit.
Although I really want to date the girl I've gone on two dates with now I don't want to put all of my eggs in the same basket. I tried setting up a another date with her yesterday but I haven't gotten an answer except that she couldn't the day I suggested. I'm not sure if this "only talking in real unless you are setting up a date" is for me either, the pace is really slow for my taste. Maybe that is how some girls are but I'm not sure I want that.
My friend has mentioned that her girlfriend said she had a "wife" for me (inside joke about me "trying finding a wife") . She had the same name as the last girl they talked about so I'm not sure if it's the same one or a new one. I will try to lurk more about it.
soooo for these apps how fast do things usually go? kinda curious
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On November 02 2015 10:59 ticklishmusic wrote:soooo for these apps how fast do things usually go? kinda curious Depends on how hot you are to be honest. If you're really hot you can probably match with a girl and get laid the same day.
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On November 02 2015 08:07 bloodwhore~ wrote: I made the choice of laying of tinder when I had my exam period due to not enough time but as I felt like it would be annoying to date multiple people at the same time. I have reconsidered a bit.
Although I really want to date the girl I've gone on two dates with now I don't want to put all of my eggs in the same basket. I tried setting up a another date with her yesterday but I haven't gotten an answer except that she couldn't the day I suggested. I'm not sure if this "only talking in real unless you are setting up a date" is for me either, the pace is really slow for my taste. Maybe that is how some girls are but I'm not sure I want that.
My friend has mentioned that her girlfriend said she had a "wife" for me (inside joke about me "trying finding a wife") . She had the same name as the last girl they talked about so I'm not sure if it's the same one or a new one. I will try to lurk more about it. If that's an issue for you you can either 1) Get busy: gym, self-development, hobbies, cool projects, friends, trips... So that you always focus on your passions and you don't give a fuck if she takes a few days to reply... you're an awesome person and have always something going on
Failing that, and if you are insecure/needy for constant attention (you are, trust me I was there you seem to copy my pattern from some 1.5years back ) you won't be able to have a happy stable long-term relationship anyways before you get to that state so definitely 2) Date more women
It's not annoying, I'm not sure what gave you that Idea. Just cut out texting completely besides setting up dates,(there won't be time for that as you'll always be on a date or having sex 3x per week+). Always start off with 1 date per week, give more time to girls that try harder/that you are starting to like more.
Also I don't get why you mind not setting up 100% dates - think of all the cool stuff and places you wanted to go to but didn't have people to join you, and just combine it with a date, be selfish, go to places you'd enjoy even without a girl! 
If one of the girls asks if you're seeing other people say honestly "yes" "I'd love to get to know a person a bit before I commit" then tell her what's special about her. It just automatically takes away the neediness out of you, and when you do choose a girl to commit to, it will be because she's just better than anyone else and you'll choose her despite having sex with 2-3 other women on a regular basis because she's just that special once you got to know her and gives you everything you want.
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On November 02 2015 10:59 ticklishmusic wrote:Show nested quote +On November 02 2015 08:07 bloodwhore~ wrote: I made the choice of laying of tinder when I had my exam period due to not enough time but as I felt like it would be annoying to date multiple people at the same time. I have reconsidered a bit.
Although I really want to date the girl I've gone on two dates with now I don't want to put all of my eggs in the same basket. I tried setting up a another date with her yesterday but I haven't gotten an answer except that she couldn't the day I suggested. I'm not sure if this "only talking in real unless you are setting up a date" is for me either, the pace is really slow for my taste. Maybe that is how some girls are but I'm not sure I want that.
My friend has mentioned that her girlfriend said she had a "wife" for me (inside joke about me "trying finding a wife") . She had the same name as the last girl they talked about so I'm not sure if it's the same one or a new one. I will try to lurk more about it. soooo for these apps how fast do things usually go? kinda curious Most dates I went on through tinder/badoo have been after 2-4 messages (+1 fast phone call). I don't like one night stands personally, but people are getting laid directly on the same day apparently.
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